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From Unmariowiki

For those without comedic tastes, the so-called "experts"at MarioWiki have a real article on Mario.
Mario's First Apperance as a Cookie.

Mario was once a character who appeared as a cookie, during the 1600s. He was made into a lot of cookies, and becuase kids liked the cookies so much the Super Mario Cookies later made Luigi cookies, starting with the game Jumpman.

After Mario and Luigi got much fame, they made short comics about them through the internet which inspired the creators of the Mario cookies to put short Mario comics on the newspapers. Later as he became more famous he got his own videogame series.

However problems started. Another company who had made Sonic Cookies and another company who made Pacman Cookies also started making Pacman and Sonic videogames and started getting more fame than Mario. Then came the Videogame War where Mario Fans, Pacman Fans and Sonic Fans fought everywhere.

What kids would show in school as well as adults in work.

Kids fought in school arguing who was better Mario, Pacman or Sonic, many got kicked out of schools for fighting, and not only did kids fight but adults too so many of them got fired. The Videogame Wars lasted for 30 years, when the creator of Sonic died and everyone forgot about Sonic, while Pacman's creator forgot about Pacman and instead made Mairo games.

While the Videogame War was on, videogame makers were afraid of making Mario and Sonic games so instead they created Luigi games. To this day, Mario videogames are now becoming less famous and they're instead making Mario foods-cookies, lollipops, sodas. The production of these products stopped when Mario was eaten by the Evil Guy.

New Mario was Mario's replacemeant, he was not a cookie, which was plus. He loved to breakdance though, and was fired. Later, he was hired again as an old man, until he died in the 1880s in a "freak ruber ducky accident."

Hitario, New Mario's replacement has so far only starred in one game, the Japan only title called Hitario the Great. The game was originally going to be called "Mario the Great", however after Nintendo discovered that they got Mario's face wrong and got instead the face of Hitler, they changed the name to Hitario. Thought the game does not have Mario, it mentiones Mario many times.

Hitario later died soon after the game was made, and Hitario's replacement was a guy named Wario.


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