You're Nicked!

From Pirate Bitch

'You're Nicked!' is a televison sitcom starring Nathan Page and Count Nicholaus Watson as two upstart cops in the Metropolitan Police Force. Forming an unlikely crime fighting duo, P.C Nick Watson and P.C Nathan Page blend right into the good cop bad cop formula. For instance where Nick would simply flash his biceps and use his handcuffs, Nathan would beat them with his baton relentlessly for calling him "Quick Finish", a name he's gained on the streets of London. The show follows their adventures on the beat, confronting drug dealers, mobsters, pimps, murderers, kidnappers, Gary Kirk, and the infamous leaders of the Piratey Bitchin' crew Leon "The Mace" Mace and Roberto "The Pixie" Paterson.

Pilot Episode

After he is mocked by the Piratey Bitchin' Crew, Nathan Page sobs and walks away extremely fast, after his standing still tactic failed. He turns to confront a yob who fiendishly pulled his bag strap, but Nick Watson defuses the situation, and gains Nathan's trust by walking very fast without ever breaking into a run. Upon discussion, they discover they hate everything about each other except their desires to become a policeman. A new, odd, and sexless partnership is formed, to stamp down the sexy boys upon the town, and rid them of their humour. "It is not funny," P.C Nathan says on the show, "Fun fuels happiness, and happiness prevents depression, and I'm having none of it!"


Quotes

"Oi, oi!"
- P.C Nick Watson, thigh grippingly fit
"Nick, run after them!"
- P.C Nathan Page, as Nick enters his long strides.
"Look lads, it's Quick Finish!"
- A deviant tart
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