MNCAN
From Egs Mayhem
MNCAN (full name Mayhem News and Current Affairs Network) is Mayhem's premier (in fact, only) 24-hour news channel. It reports news from RPs as it breaks, thanks to its dedicated team of ace reporters all over Mayhem. It was for a while under ChibiVOR's control, after he defected to the side of the Evil Overlords United, hijacked the signal and nuked the studio from orbit. As of 29 January 2008, the station is now back in the hands of its original owners, and broadcasting all the news that's fit to broadcast.
The logo.
Contents |
Slogans
- WE REPORT. YOU DON'T.
- TODAY'S HOPE. TOMORROW'S OUTLOOK. YESTERDAY'S NEWS.
- MORE NEWS THAN EVEN WE KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH.
- NEWS YOU CAN WRITE HOME ABOUT.
- WHEN NEWS BREAKS, WE FIX IT.
- ALL THAT AND A BAG OF NEWS.
- COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS, AT LEAST WE'RE NOT FOX.
- BROADCASTING MIND-CONTROL SIGNALS INTO YOUR BRAIN SINCE 2007.
- IT'S THE NEWS. THAT'S IT. GET USED TO IT.
- And many more.....
Staff
- Artmoogle - Does occasional field reports.
- Benjamin Dover - MNCAN's most prolific and probably most famous reporter. Currently filling in for Richard Head until he is rescued.
- Brick Butterwalk - MNCAN's man about town.
- Cortanya - AI form of Anya. Field reporter.
- Crispy Baines - Sports, also hosts a talk show.
- Hugh R. Watching - EGS Main correspondent.
- Jack R. Lope - Another man about town.
- James Dandy - Field reporter.
- Joel Robertson - RL correspondent.
- John Fro - Field reporter.
- Justin D. Nickerthyme - Outer space correspondent.
- Kate Defoe - Field reporter.
- Kenneth Wefixit - Portal Central correspondent.
- Miles Sinkau - Field reporter.
- Richard Head - Anchorman.
- Robert Ferapples - Reports on Let's Count to a Million!!!
- Rodger van Mortis - Obituaries.
- Squirt Mudbottom - Gossip reporter.
- Stanley Duppanshout - Reports on MY ROCK!!
- Theresa Green - Fort Mayhem correspondent.
- Toni Zerranati - Field reporter.
Programs and Subsidiary Channels
- Crispy Baines' unnamed talk show.
- The KyGreg Show.
- Mayhem Tonight - A current-affairs program. "For when you just don't give a damn about real news."
- MSN - Mayhem Sports Network. "Not just an IM client anymore!"
Rivals
- Channel Nine BSNBC
