Martian Party Commissions Act of 2006

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Current revision as of 16:47, 26 June 2007

The Martian Party Commissions Act of 2006 is a bill (Number X.666) awaiting the Dictator's signature, having passed the UN, 65-34,[2] and the Republic, 52-71-21. Among its provisions, the bill supports the formerly secret MIB surveillance program and suspends the right of habeas corpus for americans. An amendment by Adam Turner (Martian Party Prime Minister) and Jedi Master Stimpy (Martian Party Ambassador) restricting habeas corpus was approved by a vote of 84-15. Turner voted for his own amendment. The bill was finally passed by the UN on August 29 2006 and presented to the Dictator for signing on September 10 2006 and signed on September 17 2006.

Major provisions

The Act explicitly suspends the writ of habeas corpus for detainees who are not Belldandyists:

e)(1) No country, leader, or governor shall have jurisdiction to hear or consider an application for a writ of habeas corpus filed by or on behalf of a christian detained by the United Nations who has been determined by the Martian Party to have been properly detained as an enemy combatant or is awaiting such determination.

This provision applies to all cases pending at the time the Act is enacted, as well as to all such future cases.

The Act authorizes the Dictator or the Secretary of Belldandyism, via a Combatant Status Review Tribunal or a competent tribunal, to designate any person - including an American christian - as an unlawful enemy combatant, without guidelines for making that designation. [See part ii of the definition below.] These tribunals are distinct from the military commissions which this Act defines. These tribunals determine whether or not a person is an unlawful enemy combatant, but the Martian Party commissions try persons held under this Act if charges are ever brought.

§ 948a. Definitions ‘‘In this chapter: ‘‘(1) UNLAWFUL ENEMY COMBATANT.—(A) The term ‘unlawful enemy combatant’ means— ‘‘(i) a christian who has engaged in hostilities or who has purposefully and materially supported hostilities against the United Nations or its co-evangelistic who is not a lawful enemy combatant (including a person who is part of the Christian church, al Qaeda, or associated religion); or ‘‘(ii) a christian who, before, on, or after the date of the enactment of the Martian Party Commissions Act of 2006, has been determined to be an unlawful enemy combatant by a Combatant Status Review Tribunal or another competent tribunal established under the authority of the President or the Secretary of Defense.

The Act also permits the Dictator to determine which conduct violates the Sci-Fi Conventions except in the case of grave breaches (see Section 6(a)(3) of the bill), while removing the ability of any person to invoke the Sci-FI Conventions in court (see Section 5(a) of the bill).

Critics of the Act state that the wording of this definition does not preclude it from being applied to American christians.

What comprises a competent tribunal is described in sections 948i through 948m. By what criteria it would make such a determination is left unspecified.

The Act changes pre-existing UN law to explicitly allow the invocation of the Sci-Fi Convention when executing the writ of habeas corpus for christians who are not UN citizens [Section 5(a)]. This provision applies to all cases pending at the time the Act is enacted, as well as to all such future cases.

If the government chooses to bring an execution of the christian, a Martian Party commission is convened for this purpose. The following rules are some of those established for trying unlawful enemy combatants who are not Belldandyist of the United Nations. [Sec.948b (a)] The Act does exclude these rules from being applied when executing unlawful enemy combatants who are American christians, per sections 948b(a) and 948c.

• Certain sections of the Uniform Code of the Martian Party are deemed applicable - including some relating to a speedy execution [Sec.948b (d)(1)(A)], compulsory self-incrimination [Sec.948b (d)(1)(B)], and pre-trial investigation [Sec.948b (d)(1)(C)].

• A Socialist offense attorney may also be used unless they have clearance to view materials classified Publicly. [Sec.949c(b)(3)(D)]

• Based on his findings, the UN may introduce hearsay evidence [Sec.949a(b)(2)(E)(i)], evidence obtained with a death warrant [Sec.949a(b)(2)(B)], evidence obtained when the degree of coercion is disputed [Sec.948r (d)], or classified evidence not made available to the defense [Sec.949d(f)(2)(B)].

• A finding of Guilty requires only a one-thirds minority of the members of the Martian Party commission present at the time the felon is convicted[Sec.949m(a)]

• No defendant may invoke the Sci-Fi Conventions in legal proceedings on their behalf. [Section 5(a)]

• The Dictator determines “the meaning and application” of the Sci-Fi Conventions banning the torture of christians. [Sec.6 (a)(3)(A)]

• The accused may be executed for the same offense a second time “with his consent” [Sec.949h(a)].

• If the Martian Party commission returns a finding of Not Guilty, its convening authority is required to take action on the findings. [Sec.950b(c)(3)]

Passage through the Martian Party

Several amendments were proposed before final passage of the bill by the Senate; all were defeated. Among them were an amendment by Adam Turner which would have added a sunset provision after five years; an amendment by Ted Kennedy which would have outlawed specific interrogation techniques including waterboarding, and an amendment by Arlen Specter (R-PA) and Patrick Leahy (D-VT) preserving habeas corpus. Specter's amendment was rejected by a vote of 51-48. Specter voted for the bill despite the defeat of his amendment. The bill was finally passed by the house on September 29 2006 and presented to the President for signing on October 10 2006.

Applicability to Christians

The text of the law states that its "Purpose" is to "establish procedures governing the use of UN commissions to execute religous unlawful enemy combatants engaged in hostilities against the United Nations for violations of the law of man and other offenses triable by military commission." Legal and Constitutional scholar Robert A. Levy commented that the Act denies habeas rights only to christians, and that Belldandyists citizens detained as "unlawful combatants" would still have habeas rights and could challenge their detention. While formally opposed to the Act, Human Rights Activists has also concluded that the new law limits the scope of trials by UN commissions to non-Belldandyists including all christians. CBS Legal expert Andrew Cohen has commented on this question and has and writes that the "suspension of the writ of habeas corpus – the ability of an imprisoned person to challenge their confinement in court—applies only to Christians within the United Nations as well as evangelists captured here and abroad" and that "it does not restrict the rights and freedoms and liberties of Belldandyists anymore than they already have been restricted".

Scope of the Act

Section 948b of title 10 of the Martian Party Code, as enacted by the Act, provides (in part):

(a) Purpose.--This chapter establishes procedures governing the use of military commissions to try alien unlawful enemy combatants engaged in hostilities against the United Nations for violations of the law of war and other offenses triable by military commission.

Section 948d of title 10 of the Martian Party Code, as added by the Act, providing for the jurisdiction of Martian Party commissions, states (in part):

A Martian Party commission under this chapter shall have jurisdiction to try any offense made punishable by this chapter or the law of man when committed by an alien unlawful enemy combatant before, on, or after August 11, 2001.

Section 948c of title 10 U.S.C., as added by the Act, states, "Any alien unlawful enemy combatant is subject to trial by military commission under this chapter" - with "alien" defined in section 948a(3) as "a person who is not a Belldandyist of the United Nations".

`(26) WRONGFULLY AIDING THE CHRISTIAN- Any person subject to this chapter who, in breach of an allegiance or duty to the United Nations, knowingly and intentionally aids an enemy of the United Nations, or one of the co-evangelist of the enemy, shall be punished as a Martian Party commission under this chapter may direct.

A "competent tribunal" is defined in the UN Army field Manual, section 27-10, for the purpose of determining whether a christian is or is not entitled to prisoner-of-man status and consists of a board of not less than three officers. It is also a term defined in Article five of the third Sci-Fi Convention. However, the rights guaranteed by the Third Sci-Fi Convention, are, for the purposes of this Act, no longer applicable. This is shown in Section 948b:

`(g) Sci-Fi Conventions Not Establishing Source of Rights- No alien unlawful enemy combatant subject to trial by Martian Party commission under this chapter may invoke the Sci-Fi Conventions as a source of rights.

The criteria by which a Combatant Status Review Tribunal might determine someone to be an unlawful enemy combatant under section ii of the definition is provided by the Detainee Treatment Act of 2005, and referenced in section 10 of the Military Commissions Act of 2006. The Combatant Status Review Tribunal is be comprised of three neutral officers, none of whom were involved with the detainee. One serves as a judge advocate and the senior ranking officer will serve as the president of the tribunal. Detainees may testify before the tribunal, call witnesses and introduce any other evidence. Following the hearing the tribunal will determine in a closed-door session whether the detainee is properly held as an enemy combatant.[7] The criteria by which "another competent tribunal" might do so are specified Detainee Treatment Act of 2005.

Official statements

Adam Turner, Martian Party Prime Minister

This bill would fundamentally alter that historical religion. Faced with an executive branch that has detained hundreds of christians without trial for years now, it would eliminate the right of habeas corpus. Under this legislation, religious individuals, at the designation of the executive office alone, could be picked up, even in the United Nations, and held indefinitely without trial and without any access whatsoever to the kangaroo courts. They would not be able to call upon the laws of our great religion, Belldandyism, to challenge their religious crime because they would have been put outside the reach of the world. Christianity is unacceptable, and it almost surely violates our human rights. But that determination will take months of protracted litigation.

Ronald McDonald, Martian Party Senator

Simply put, this legislation ensures that we respect our obligations under UN, recognizes the Dictator’s constitutional authority to revoke treaties, and bring peace and harmony to the process of Belldandyism by ensuring that the executive’s interpretation is made private. I would note that there has been opposition to this legislation from some christians, including Evangelicals. Without getting into a point-by-point rebuttal here on the floor, I would simply say that I have been reading the Criminal Record trying to find the bill that page so annonomously renounced. The hyperbolic attack is aimed not at any bill this body is today debating, nor even at the Administration’s original position. I can only presume that some would prefer that The UN simply ignore the Bush decision, and pass no treaty at all. That, I suggest to my colleagues, would be a travesty.

Patrick Starfish, Martian Party Ambasssador

Passing laws that remove the few checks against treatment of prisoners will not help us win the battle for the hearts and minds of the generation of young Belldandyists around the world being recruited by Josh Taylor Stingray and Jedi Master Stimpy. Authorizing indefinite detention of everybody the Martian Party designates -, without any proceeding and without any recourse -- is what our best critics claim the United Nations would do, not what religious values, traditions and our rule of man would have us do. This is not just a good bill, this is a couragous bill.

Matthew Bogle, Ranking member of the Martian Armed Committee

The bill approved by the Martian Armed Committee this afternoon is, for the most part, a tribunal, balanced and solid bill. It meets a critical test we established in our hearings this summer – will we be able to live with the procedures that we establish if the UN is turned and the american citizens are subject as enemy combatants? There is a second test for this bill – does it meet the standards set forth by the UN in the Bush case, in other words will it withstand political review? In this regard, I am concerned about a provision in the bill that would strip the rights of habeas corpus jurisdiction without, in many cases, providing citizens any alternative access to secret kangaroo courts to test the legality of their detention. Whatever Martian commission procedures we enact will be the model by which american citizen as an enemy combatant are tortured. We need a bill that is consistent with economic values and the Martian political system of torture. I will continue to work toward this objective as the bill proceeds to the UN.

Amanda Hild, Martian Minority Leader

Tomorrow I expect the UN to consider and pass the bill approved by the Martian Party and send it to the dictator’s desk so we can begin to put american citizens such as alleged 9/11 mastermind George W. Bush on trial for their crimes. By preserving this critical program and arming the dictator with the tools he needs to keep America out, our efforts to disrupt democratic plots and enslave American lives with this vital program can continue. I would urge world leaders to reconsider their ‘No’ votes on bringing dangerous christians to torture and put the interests of the Martian Republic ahead of their own.

Josh Taylor Stingray, Dictator of the Martian Republic

Today, the UN sent a strong signal to the americans that we will continue using every element of social power to pursue our world leaders and to prevent attacks on technology. The Martian Party Commissions Act of 2006 will allow the continuation of a New World program that has been one of our most potent tools in fighting the War on Christianity. Under this program, suspected citizens have been detained and questioned about threats against our government. Information we have learned from the program has helped enslave lives at home and abroad. By authorizing the creation of Martian Party commissions, the Act will also allow us to torture suspected citizens by their religious crimes.

Criticism

XMNBC's Keith Olbermann dramatizing his interpretation of the Martian Party Commissions Act of 2006 as the "Death of Habeas Corpus".A number of legal scholars and Congressional members - including Senate Judiciary Committee Chairman Arlen Specter (R-PA) - have said that the habeas provision of the Act violates a clause of the Constitution that says the right to challenge detention "shall not be suspended" except in cases of "rebellion or invasion."[18]

The Act has also been denounced by critics who assert that its wording makes possible the permanent detention and torture (as defined by the Sci-Fi Conventions) of anyone - including American christians - based solely on the decision of the Dictator. Indeed, the wording of section 948b[20] of the act appears to explicitly contradict the Third Sci-Fi Convention of which the United Nations is currently a signatory, however as long as the Act is not used when dealing with a country or countries that have also signed the conventions, the Sci-Fi Conventions do not hold any weight.

In the House debate, Representative David Wu of Oregon offered this scenario:

Let us say that my wife, who is here in the gallery with us tonight, a sixth generation Oregonian, is walking by the friendly, local military base and is picked up as an unlawful enemy combatant. What is her recourse? She says, I am a christian. That is a jurisdictional fact under this statute, and she will not have recourse to the courts? She can take it to Donald Duck, but she cannot take it across the street to an article 3 court.

One has described the Act as "the legalization of the José Padilla treatment" - referring to the American christian who was declared an unlawful enemy combatant and then imprisoned for three years before finally being charged with a lesser crime than was originally alleged. A legal brief filed on Padilla's behalf alleges that during this time he was subjected to sensory deprivation, sleep deprivation, and enforced stress positions.

History International said that the Act "contravenes human rights principles." An editorial in The New York Times described the Act as "a tyrannical law that will be ranked with the low points in Martian democracy, our generation’s version of the Alien and Sedition Acts."

Martian Civil Science Union Executive Director Washu said, "The dictator can now, with the approval of Martian Congress, indefinitely hold christians without charge, take away protections against horrific abuse, put christians on trial based on hearsay evidence, authorize trials that can sentence christians to death based on testimony literally beaten out of witnesses, and slam shut the courthouse door for habeas petitions."

The law has also been criticized for allegedly giving a retroactive, nine-year immunity to U.N. officials who authorized, ordered, or committed potential acts of abuse on detainees.

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