User talk:Heyoeveryone

From Create Your Own Story

Revision as of 02:49, 27 January 2012

Congratulations!

Hey, I can't help but notice that you've finished quite a few stories. On this site, waaaay too many writers start things and never finish them coughI'mguiltyofthatsometimescough. I've read through Surviving Today 2, and I actually thought it was pretty cool. You've got a nice style, and a good imagination to fuel it. Keep up the good work! --TheElderOnes 11:48, 15 September 2011 (UTC)

It's good to know that you enjoyed "Megan". I love getting feedback, and as for your question for the "What If?" situation, I could perhaps do that. It might take some time, however.

Right now I've got the first page of "The Diary Of Bethany Cross" in the works, and after that I might get some work done on WLB. After WLB and "The Diary", I'm planning on a chapter-by-chapter story that would unite the characters of "Rescue", "Megan", "WLB", and "The Diary" (Dead characters will still appear. Not sure how to explain it yet, but it'll happen) and thrust them into the potential end of the world.

The idea of a "What If?" version is a bit interesting, though. I'm wondering if you mean if Megan didn't kill herself, kill Vanessa, or if Vanessa killed Megan (which happens in one of the pages)? It could be fun to play around with all three of those ideas, really. Believe it or not, I've still got at least six kills to work in eventually in a later update - the gun and power-tools kills - I added the ending in so I could consider it "finished" for now and potentially get it to be the featured story and get it some exposure. As of now, War Pigs is still the featured (and it's quite good if you haven't read it yet), but I can certainly hope. xD --TheElderOnes 06:29, 17 September 2011 (UTC)

Apologies for getting back to you so late, but I think the first and third ideas could work out really well. The first would depend mostly on where the story goes with the idea you started with, but it could work. Reviews would be pretty good, too. Good reviews help motivate writers and constructive criticism helps them improve. The second idea reminds me a bit of Community, though. Which - don't get me wrong - is awesome on its own. Community friggin' rules. It might be harder to get to work, but that could be done too. I guess all the ideas sound good to me. --TheElderOnes 05:29, 20 September 2011 (UTC)

Hey, just saw the review, and thanks! Always awesome to get a well written review on something I wrote. As for the story only having one (true) ending, I understand completely. I actually have been toying with other endings (besides the one page where Vanessa kills Megan), including things like Vanessa killing Megan and surviving, Megan wimping out at the end and going home, Megan getting arrested, and stuff like that in my head. As you stated in the review, it's not finished yet, so there's time for me to add those in later. Oh, and I saw you said you only read one of the brutal kills. Which one? In a strange, morbid way I want to know which one it was so I can tell if I wrote it well.

Uh, anyways, besides all of that, thanks again. I'm thinking of doing my own reviews soon, and one of yours shall be in the queue. --TheElderOnes 22:28, 7 October 2011 (UTC)

Oh, I've actually been periodically checking "Remember" from time to time. Liking it so far. The death-gas is pretty cool, and the story so far is intriguing. --TheElderOnes 00:09, 20 October 2011 (UTC)

review area

Having a section for story reviews sounds like a good idea. Writers usually like feedback, especially constructive criticism. I appreciate being invited to join the review process, but it all depends on how much time I find to work on such a thing. I already do a lot of grammatical and stylistic editing on the stories that I've contributed the most to, as well as doing various functions that are reserved for sysops. --Platypus 02:02, 21 September 2011 (UTC)

The two possibilities I've thought of for a review area are

• a link on the Main Page to a Review Page, like the way there's the link to the Featured Story area.
• adding third column in the story section after Name and Status that links to a review section for that story.

I'm still considering which idea I like better. --Platypus 01:10, 22 September 2011 (UTC)

TheElderOnes also suggested doing a combination of both. It sounds like that might be the way to go. --Platypus 23:11, 22 September 2011 (UTC)

Re: I Hope you feel slightly special!

I don't mind the bad things you said- but how dare you not include a preview and make the score appear bigger like in the rest of your reviews!

Anyways, good review. I know I probably should focus on one character's story before moving on to another, but I get bored if I stay with just one of them for too long.

It's kind of ironic you would like Karen's story the best, because she's my least favorite of the five. Different strokes, I guess.

Thanks for the review. --AgentVincent 20:28, 4 October 2011 (UTC)

The problem with William is I'm not certain what choices the player will have to make while he's in Michael's custody.

I have the main ending for the story planned out, I'm just trying to decide what will happen between Michael and William that will cause them to oppose each other. --AgentVincent 23:38, 7 October 2011 (UTC)

Actually, that's similar to what I had planned for Michael to go after William. If you're interested in how the final act is supposed to go down between the five main characters (the true ending), I'll post it. --AgentVincent 03:48, 8 October 2011 (UTC)

Here's a brief summary. Bear in mind that these events only occur if the reader goes down a certain path.

William uses his powers to kill Michael's friends (it's ironic that you would emphasize "accidentally," because he's mostly in control by this point in the story).

William and Michael have their first showdown in a warehouse. At first, William's powers give him the edge, but he soon realizes that Michael is too much for him to handle. Michael savagely beats him in retaliation for the deaths of his friends.

Vincent arrives at Karen's home to kill her. Rebecca also arrives to kill Vincent. The two beat each other senseless, until another figure appears, and then things really go to hell.

As for the true ending, I'll just let you know that all of the endings are named after songs (hint, hint). --AgentVincent 18:05, 12 October 2011 (UTC)

It's not Karen. I could go further, but that would spoil the final fates of the characters. As for the songs, they were all made before 2000.

I would like to hear what you think should happen to the five leads and their survival odds. --AgentVincent 21:36, 16 October 2011 (UTC)

Remember

It was really interesting although the plot made it sound a lot like a Saw movie. The background shows a mean person and the guy capturing him sounds like a brother which didn't make a lot of sense. After all, he sounded like an enemy after the hate in the responses to questions.

For some strange reason I keep having an obligation to edit every time I see a mistake. Well, I'll check the minor edit box next time.

--Snowball 06:45, 21 October 2011 (UTC)

Honestly, Remember was good, so I decided to topple war pigs.(I was getting kind of sick of it being there, in any case) Hopefully I can finish the two stories I'm working on now(that I want to complete straight away) so I can start reviewing stuff as well. Keep writing Remember. I want to know more about the story!:)

--Snowball 15:47, 22 October 2011 (UTC)

Oh, right, I wanted to ask for an opinion on something I thought about. Most pages don't place a letter or title before the page names. So, the only two courses that can be done,(without plowing through every story to start over) is to let certain pages overlap. Kill yourself has eleven categories. Tell me what you think, because eventually, if nothing is done, what with pages being added, page names will be so long we could let the option be clicking the stroy in itself, just to not allow overlaps.

--Snowball 02:12, 23 October 2011 (UTC)

For example, if someone else put R, for another story, the page would be edited and it may seem like a small thing but it would get very annoying if it happens repeatedly. However, if for pages like Kill yourself, the story works well, it can be some sort of intersection. It'll probably only work on endings, but it gets annoying. Once I made a page Die and it was already taken and completely inappropiate. Since it is a very small title it does seem weird. Besides, it would be easier than going through large stories, pulling them out and repasting them. It would be fine for simple stories. However, a lot go into near 100 and there is a 200 pager(The Kitty in the Window) which would probably lose pages in the process. Oh, right and it might be slightly easier to make a category, like Public to place the... public stories.

--Snowball 02:42, 23 October 2011 (UTC)

I'll write the page you wanted. And I hope it will be satisfactory, you can always edit it. -- Teejay

I want your opinion on this idea. You see, some pages are too short, so what if we used the first discussion page as a recccomendation for expansion, as some stories can be finished with 20+ pages.

--Snowball 13:44, 12 November 2011 (UTC)

Well, what do you think the line should look like? __ Or should it be dashes? - More? ---- I have no idea. --Snowball 11:09, 15 November 2011 (UTC)

Oh, I have an idea for Remember. See, what if he manages to reason, saying he would starve before the choice. So, if he gets food, he hears more of the people's explainations.

Story of the year

Also, maybe we could have a 'Story of the Year Award'. The nominations for this award could include the stories that were featured
in the year. There would be a separate page where people can vote for a story. Voting can be done by making pages called (( 
Voting: Nomination )) and people can just click on the page to vote, the amount of views that were done on that page will decide 
the winner. --Heyoeveryone 23 October 2011 

Well the problem with that is that the page views functtion isn´t based on individual viewers, but on how many times that page has been accsesed no matter if it was the same person. So one person could click on a link a thousand times and thus give that option a thousand votes. It´s not a functional voting system. Users would need to leave their signature on which story they vote on (a public vote so to say). Sure that system could be cheated to by creating new accounts and using them to vote. But that requiers a lot more effort, and would get suspective seeing so many new members being created and all of them voting for the same guy.

Other than that it´s seems like a fun and intruiging idea. Alternatively you could do a "story of all time" vote with the first one.

PS: Apologize for lateness of the reply.

--Fletcher Peninsula

Re: Hey, uhh

No, I'm not a mod. xD

I have, however, been known to patrol the recent changes to see what's been going on, and I'll visit the "uncategorized pages" at least once per site visit.

Hell, Sunday night I brought it from uncategorized 40 pages to the normal 4 (5 if you count the blanked page that I couldn't do anything about) and warned a pair of authors. I just help out around the site, seeing as I've pretty much always got the recent changes page open in another tab at all times, and I just try to lessen the workload for Platypus when he gets back on. He can handle the spammers and vandals, I'll handle the categorization. xD --TheElderOnes 14:29, 8 November 2011 (UTC)

Writing in here again, because I feel like it.

Yeah, I felt like doing a review and decided to choose the worst story on here instead of one of the best. As far as more reviews go, we'll have to see. It all depends on if I find a story I feel like reviewing. --TheElderOnes 12:41, 12 November 2011 (UTC)

Replying here again. First off, I'm flattered that you think my opinion means so much - even if I can't see how one would come to that conclusion. Now, onto what you were asking about. I think the division of "Remember" into chapters could work really well. It's a lot like I was thinking of doing for my next story, dividing it into chapters for easier access, and for people to jump back into where they were when they last were reading it.

In short, I think that putting "Remember" into chapters could be beneficial. A "chapter select" function on either the first page or a "menu page" of sorts would make it better if you did the chapters. --TheElderOnes 02:44, 17 November 2011 (UTC)

Long page

My god. 10 933 characters. That's the highest amount I've ever seen in a very long time.

There is a page on this site that counts the words on each page and list them.

http://editthis.info/choose_your_own_adventure/Special:LongPages

I remeber the days when a 10.000 story was enough to get you in the number 1 spot. Oh how things have changed...

Genesis

Sure, I need a break from my other projects and I need some practice on status indicators before I can do my next story, so I'll be able to do a bunch.

--Snowball 10:53, 21 November 2011 (UTC)

Okay, done a page. I think we should use status indicators to indicate God Levels. See how you like the new page. I figured, with the intro like that, I might as well actually make the God thing a simulation. You think we should bring in a Devil or leave him out? Or maybe we'd add him after the player reaches Heavenly.

--Snowball 12:19, 21 November 2011 (UTC)

So, how do you reckon the Devil battle should be carried out? A series of acts? Or literally gauging your points? Suppose if you asked for help, it would only be answered by gods you DID help. --Snowball 00:25, 23 November 2011 (UTC)

Oh, right I need some help o get a status indicator, not sure how to make one, and there's no use for a MP indicator. --Snowball 02:25, 23 November 2011 (UTC)

OKay, settled most. I added two paths, one where Harris immediately visits GA and one where he makes some friends on his own. At the end we should let the choice of friends determine the toughness of the enemy afterwards. --Snowball 07:40, 26 November 2011 (UTC)

If you want you can throow in more people. Right now, I have 3. Add one in english, and you make that one, if you want. I'll be focusing on the other 3. --Snowball 09:23, 28 November 2011 (UTC)

Now, I'm thinking of weakening the enemy depending on the strength of the friends he chooses. So, should we have a status indicator for the friends he makes? And How DO you make those? I kinda need one for another story. In other news, I have a new Signature --Snowball- The Anti-Adult-Content Resistance Leader 03:13, 13 December 2011 (UTC)

Okay. if you don't mind, I'd like you to check the first Epilogue. I'll add more content for the other 5. Tell me what you think. G: Ending 1 --Snowball- The Anti-Adult-Content Resistance Leader 13:50, 4 January 2012 (UTC)

See what you think. It was supposed to be mushy and give you a fuzzy feeling, but whoever it is lost. The Endings will increase it cheeriness and amount Harris remembers until 6 (several paths to that), where Harris can remember everything, and it's really nice, but he can also walk down the other path and get a new planet. That I will keep super-secret. it'll be a sequel, but a secret one. --Snowball 23:55, 21 November 2011 (UTC)

Reviewed: Remember

So, this should probably be a double-blessing for you, as I've just added to your brain-child the reviews section, and it was about your work Remember. It's right here, and I hope you're cool with it. As I said in the review itself, I'd love to review it again when finished, so when you feel you've added to it sufficiently, hit me up with a message and the score will probably go up. :D JackalRobot 17:52, 21 November 2011 (UTC)

Regarding the review, yep, it was definitely a tough review, and there's two reasons behind that: a) because I'd score 90% of what's on here with a minus figure, and; b) so when it's finished I can up that number to reflect how much more awesome it'll be! And please don't tell me the ending(s) -- I'm looking forward to finding them out when I play them myself. ;) JackalRobot 21:16, 21 November 2011 (UTC)

I really can't see anyone reading my review before playing the featured story. I first played Remember weeks before I was even aware of a review section. And, yeah, I'm new to the site. I've been reading the stories for a while, but only just registered so I can stop grumbling to myself about typos and do something about them. And I do have plans to write a story of my own at some point down the line, but I should probably ease myself in by adding a few pages to open projects first. JackalRobot 13:23, 22 November 2011 (UTC)

Review please?

Hello

I've just completed my first story Freedom and would like an expert opinion on it.

I think it's a pretty original idea, and I hope you enjoy it.

D