Other Character Email Red/Yellow
From Umcom
{Red is sitting at his red dinner table with the Reddy 733 on it. He types in "Redmail.redd" on it. An email pops up.}
RED:Everything in the world should be green. JUST KIDDING!
Yo RED! You're dead! Yellow forevar! With love and nothing else, Yellow. Impasse, Ohio
RED:You don't need to tell me where you live! I LIVE IN THE SAME PLACE! The only color I hate worse than green is yellow! So you are gonna be dead! Not me. In fract, you are threatening me! That's illegal! I'll talk to Old Man Watchitt!
{Red gets up and walks out the door. He walks outside pass the mailbox and into a tube and then comes out another tube and goes across a little bridge. The bridge dissapears after he's done and then walks pass a couple buildings and goes inside the last one. Cut to an old man with blue clothing sitting on a green chair in a small house reading a book. Red walks in.}
RED:Um, sir?
OLD MAN WATTCHIT:What?? Who are you? Get off my rug!
{He turns around.}
OLD MAN WATTCHIT:Oh, it's you Green!
RED:I'm Red sir.
OLD MAN WATTCHIT:{Angry} WELL IT'S NOT MY FAULT I'M COLORBLIND! NOW GET OFF MY RUG AND GET OUT!!
RED:But sir-
{Cut to outside Wattchit's house. Red flies out of the chimney and lands on the ground.}
RED:That guy's a pshycotic! I won't let him do that! I'll disguise myself as...Green! No...I can't wear that horid color. I'll just be Red!
{He goes back inside. Cut back to Wattchit's house. Wtchit is reading on the couch again. Red comes in.}
RED:I'd like to report a threat sir!
{Wattchit turns around.}
WATTCHIT:Oh, hello Green! Tell Red I hate him and i'll never talk to him again!
RED:Uh...yes sir. I am being threatened! By Yellow! He's gonna kill me!
WATTCHIT:We can't stand for this! I well go to your house and protect you with my guards!
RED:Uh...{Nervous.} yeah. By the way, I redid my place. It's still green, but it's different.
WATCHITT:Okay then, Green.
{Green comes in.}
GREEN:Hey sir.
WATTCHIT:IT'S YOU RED!! I'LL KILL YOU!
GREEN:What?!
{Wattchit picks up Green and stuffs him up the chimney. He shoots out the chimney.}
WATTCHIT:Let's go so you can get off my rug!
{Cut to the place where the bridge was.}
WATTCHIT:Don't you live over on that side of Impasse?
RED:No sir. You're jost getting old and forgetful.
WATCHITT:Oh.
{Red takes out a switch and he puts his spear in it and the bridge appears. They walk across it. Cut to Wattchit and Red upstairs in Red's house.}
WATTCHIT:I thought your bed was over there, Green.
RED:No sir. Old and also forgetful sir.
{A yellow clothed guy with a backwards hat and spear crashes through the window.}
YELLOW:I'm gonna kill you Red!
{Red's eyes widen.}
WATTCHIT:RED?!
RED:No sir. He meant Green.
YELLOW:No, I meant Red.
WATTCHIT:I KNEW IT!! YOU'RE RED!! GREEN IS TALLER! I'LL KILL YOU!!!
{Wattchit picks up Red and stuffs him up the chimney. Cut to Red flying out the chimney, except this time he flys away from the camera. Cut to a yellow house that looks like Green's except it's yellow, and the bedroom is on the first floor and a kitchen is on the second floor on the left. The stairs are on the right, like Green's.}
RED:Ohh...ow. Look at this ugly yellow house. The bedroom is on the first floor. Pff...
{Ding dong!}
RED:Who's there?
VOICE:Blue!
RED:Blue who?
BLUE:Are you okay?
{Laughter from sitcom audience.}
RED:That was lame. Come in.
{A blue clothed guy with a spear and a blue tophat comes in.}
BLUE:Hello!
{Red comes downstairs.}
RED:Hey.
BLUE:WHA WHA?! WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE?!
RED:What?
BLUE:I was coming here to see my brother Yellow when I see a a burgular in his house!
RED:No! I'm not a burgular! I'm just here because Yellow tried to k-
BLUE:Save it Red burgular!
{Blue takes out a blue cell phone and dials something. He then holds it to his ear.}
BLUE:Hello? Impasse police?
{Red's eyes widen.}
BLUE:Yes, there's a burgular in Yellow's house in North Impasse.
{Red runs to the door but Blue holds the spear to his throat.}
BLUE:Okay. Bye.
{He hands up the cell phone and bars come down on all the windows and doors.}
RED:What the craps?
BLUE:That's something that automatically happens when there is a robber or murderer so they don't ecscape.
RED:But what if there's a murderer and he murders you because you can't leave the house and run away?
{Blue's eyes widen.}
BLUE:DON'T HURT ME!!
RED:What?
{The police bust the door open, breaking the bars.}
COP:IMPASSE POLICE! DON'T MOVE!
BLUE:HE THREATENED TO KILL ME!!
RED:Yeah!
{Red grabs Blue and puts a spear to his throat.}
RED:If you come near me or arrest me, Blue gets it!
{The police drop there guns. Red runs out of the house. The yellow paper comes down.}
