Other Character Email Airstar Flyer/Zachery
From Umcom
{Cut to Airstar in his blimp at his Skypy.}
AIRSTAR:Give me a good email, because I don't want no spam, hangin' out the side of his best friend's ride.
MarzipanHomestarFan66Hi there, Airstar.
Zachery W.
Have you ever met Homestar Runner?
After all, you are cousins.
Sincerely,
AIRSTAR:What? Of course i've met him! Like a million times! You should really read some other emails. I mean, look at these photos.
{Cut to a picture of Airstar and Homestar on a roller Coaster.}
AIRSTAR:That was summer of 07'. We were riding, the Awesome-inator.
{Cut to a photo of Airstar and Homestar with jackets on in the snow with Snow sculptures of themselves right next to them.}
AIRSTAR:That was Winter of 08'. Those sculptures looked awesome until rumors started going around that we were white supremasists.
{Cut to a photo Airstar and Homestar playing cards on a fold out table in Airstar's blimp with dim lighting.}
AIRSTAR:That was Autumn 0f 06'. I took like, one thousand of his dollars during one game.
{Cut to a photo of Airstar and Homestar in black outfits robbing a bank.}
AIRSTAR:That was, that was n-nothing.
{He takes the picture down. Cut to a picture of Airstar and Homestar right next to the Skypy.}
AIRSTAR:That was Spring 0f 08'. The point is, i've met him lots of times. For example, remember the 90's? Well i'll give you a flashback to the 90's you'll never forget. Hit it!
{Cut to a "Homestar Enters the Strongest Man in The World Contest"-esque book, with the title "The Airstar Flyer meets The Homestar Runner" and a picture of Original Book Homestar and Original Book Airstar, who looks like original book Homestar but with a blue shirt and a star and not a duck, plus he has orange soles and a larger propeller, standing in the original book field meeting each other.}
AIRSTAR:Airstar meets Homestar! Copyright 1996, MikeControl inc. Even though MikeControl was one years old in 96'.
{The page turns to Airstar in his blimp dancing.}
Once upon a 1996, a 19 1/2 year old Airstar Flyer was dancing wildly.
"Dancing is great!" Said The Airstar Flyer.
Then, his blimp crashed and he limped out, with a head injury.
"Oh no! That's the second blimp i've broken!" Exclaimed The Airstar Flyer.
Just then, The Homestar Runner walks up to him.
"Are you alriiiiight?" Babbled The Homestar Runner.
"Yeah, i'm fine. Just help me rebuild my blimp, Mysterious Stranger." Retorted Handsome Airstar.
"I'm The Homestar Runner!" Jarganed The Homestar Runner.
Then, Strong Bad and The Cheat walked in.
"I guess you are flying abilities are limited!" Heckled Strong Bad.
"That's not good/nice, you take it back!" Wailed The Homestar Runner.
"No I am not going to do that." Snapped Strong Bad.
"I guess we have to fight, th-then." Suggested Airstar.
So they all went to the Stone Bridge for some good/awesome times that involve fighting. They grabbed their knives and started fighting.
"Cut me, Homestar, Cut me!" Shrieked Airstar.
Airstar was pinned.
"Stay down, Airstar, Stay down!" Cracked Homestar.
But did he stay down? No! He gets back up and runs away with Homestar. The end.
{Cut back to the computer.}
AIRSTAR:See? SEE?! And if that's not proof enough for you, then how about this 1998 flashback?
{Cut to 21 1/2 year old Airstar in a dormroom writing a paper. He's wearing a blue Turtleneck shirt with a star on it.}
AIRSTAR:Hmmm...
{22 year old Homestar comes in.}
HOMESTAR:Hey, man.
AIRSTAR:Go away, man. I'm trying to work on an essay.
HOMESTAR:Oh, that's nice! I walk up your freakishly long stairs to be rejected away!
AIRSTAR:I have land-phobia!
{Il Cartographer Strong Bad comes in.}
IL CARTOGRAPHER:Are we gonna have this fight or not?
HOMESTAR:Oh, right.
{He puts on the Jack Em' Up kid outfit.}
HOMESTAR:Let's do this!
{Airstar jumps up.}
AIRSTAR:I wanna be the fight and stuff.
STRONG BAD:What's gonna be your gimmick?
AIRSTAR:Hmmm...
{Cut to the orange door of the Gymatorium from Sbemail 183.}
ANNOUNCER:And hailing from parts known, The Mad Pilot!
{Airstar dressed as a pilot with a stubbly chin comes out.}
SINGERS:It's the mad pilot! (He's crashin' the plane!) It's the mad pilot! (He's screamin' in the rain!) It's Gardenboy, I mean The Mad Pilot!
{Cut to Mad Pilot in the ring being interviewed by The Announcer.}
MAD PILOT:WELL YOU KNOW THAT GUY IS MAKES MAD AHHHHH!!!! I'm gonna pin him through the ground, all the way down to China! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
{Cut to The Jack Em' Up Kid being interviewed.}
JACK EM' UP KID:Well you know that's just some baloGna! HOO YEAH! I'm gonna-do-gonna be the greatest person to ever step into the ring and fight the Angry-Style-Pilot-Type down to Florida! HOO YEAH! Keep on you bad hats, 'cause i'm gonna blow the way for, HOO YEAH!
{Cut back to Airstar.}
AIRSTAR:So, I won that match by a hair. Literally. I poked him with some hair and he fell down. Wasn't because of the hair, he had just eaten some bad P.F. Chang's earlier. Then, there's the Millenium Party The King Of Town held.
{Cut to a ball drop right next to The KOT's castle with "1999" and "2000" at the bottom at night time. The King Of Town is at a podium while the rest of the town is just socializing. Cut to Airstar and Homestar holding Martinis talking.}
AIRSTAR:So, only five more minutes the year 2000. Excited?
HOMESTAR:Yeah. By the year 2000, I bet there'll be flying cars and holograms and space travel and Cheez-Its and Cheerios in the same box!
AIRSTAR:I doubt that they'll have Cheez-Its and Cheerios in the same box. All your other predictions might happen, though.
HOMESTAR:No chance they won't happen.
{Strong Bad walks over.}
STRONG BAD:Well, 3 minutes ti'll 2000.
KOT:{Offscreen} Citizens!
{Cut to him at the podium.}
KING OF TOWN':2000 is upon us! We will call the volunteers that agreed to wear the ridiculous outfits!
{We pan to the right to see Strong Sad, Homsar, Coach Z and Schoolstar in costumes. Strong Sad is wearing a "Two" costume while Homsar is wearing a "0" costume, and so is Coach Z and Schoolstar.}
STRONG SAD:How did I agree to do this?
{We pan to the right to see Strong Bad.}
STRONG BAD:Like you always agree to do humiliating things. Me hitting you over the head with the Tandy 400!
STRONG SAD:Right.
COACH Z:Alright, gors. Let's bes doin' this. The sorng!
ALL:2000 is a time of joy, unless Y2K obliterates us all.
STRONG BAD:How was that a song?
KOT:15 seconds! Get in place!
{All the guys in costumes rip them off and jump into the audience.}
ALL:TEN!
{Cut to Strong Bad with his two brothers and The Cheat.}
STRONG BAD:NINE!
{Cut to Homestar and Marzipan}
HOMESTAR:EIGHT!
{Cut to Homsar.}
HOMSAR:SLEVEN!!!
{Cut to Coach Z and Bubs.}
COACH Z:SORX!
BUBS:FIVE!
{Cut to The King and The Poopsmith.}
KOT:FOUR!
{The Poopsmith holds up a sign that says "Four". Cut to The Chuck.}
THE CHUCK:THREE!
{Cut to Schoolstar.}
SCHOOLSTAR:TWO!
{Cut to Airstar.}
AIRSTAR:ONE!
{Cut to Airstar at his computer in 2008.}
AIRSTAR:See? The 90's weren't just about good sitcoms and monitors so big you could fit several families of illegal immigrants in it, they were also about turtlenecks and flashbacks! So, until next time, keep on-
HOMESTAR:{Offscreen} A-em.
{Zoom out view. Airstar turns around to see Airstar.}
AIRSTAR:What you want?
HOMESTAR:Oh, nothing. Just this.
{Homestar holds out a camera and takes a picture. Cut to an old Airstar sometime in the future sitting on a park bench with crumbling cities behind him, holding the photo Homestar just took, talking to a mysterious alien with a green, spikey face and a cape. In the background you can hear bombing and sirens.}
AIRSTAR:That was Spring of 08'. Man, those were the days.
ALIEN:SHUT UP AND GET BACK TO WORK, SLAVE!
AIRSTAR:Sorry, Supreme overlord Voznothhx!
{Airstar runs off.}
VOZNOTTHX:YEAH YOU BETTER RUN! It's a beautiful day.
{The paper comes down, on fire.}
