Talk:Adventures in Space
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Please add your comments and ideas here, or just add/edit the story directly if you have a good idea. Thanks for reading! [[User:Haruz|Haruz]] 22:32, 5 January 2011 (UTC) | Please add your comments and ideas here, or just add/edit the story directly if you have a good idea. Thanks for reading! [[User:Haruz|Haruz]] 22:32, 5 January 2011 (UTC) | ||
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| + | == Good, solid story, needs more personal hook == | ||
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| + | The story is shaping up very nicely, but could use a few more things to make it seem a bit more personally engaging. I don't mean you need to define the protagonist any more (though that suggestion with the parents seems to have a lot of potential), but you might want to put in a little bit more description, maybe make the dialogue a little more personal. Show the protagonist to have a relationship with or bias to the characters around him/her. Otherwise? Awesome. Please write more! :D [[User:JackalRobot|JackalRobot]] 18:10, 20 November 2011 (UTC) | ||
Current revision as of 18:10, 20 November 2011
Hi and welcome to my story, Adventures in Space!
Feel free to edit/add. If you want to make the headings better, go ahead. I haven't quite got the hang of it yet. They look like: Adventures in Space/AiS Wait etc.
The background of the story is that you are commanding some space ships that go and investigate a distress call. You are representing a group of three planets, amongst 46 known human colonies. When the colonies were created there was not enough inter-planetary infrastructure so the planets fragmented into small groups. This bred space piracy and war, starting a techno "dark age". This allows a certain amount of mystery in the story. I don't think humans have met any aliens before, although there might be rumours of aliens encountered by other planets, from traders that stopped at the Local Group (LG).
I was thinking that maybe the "you" character's background could be that your father/mother was on a ship captured by space pirates 20 years ago and you have never seen them since. This could add personal interest to the character and lead to some plot motivation. I haven't decided what they will encounter when they meet the distressed ship - this may vary from storyline to storyline or may follow a loose consistency.
Please add your comments and ideas here, or just add/edit the story directly if you have a good idea. Thanks for reading! Haruz 22:32, 5 January 2011 (UTC)
Good, solid story, needs more personal hook
The story is shaping up very nicely, but could use a few more things to make it seem a bit more personally engaging. I don't mean you need to define the protagonist any more (though that suggestion with the parents seems to have a lot of potential), but you might want to put in a little bit more description, maybe make the dialogue a little more personal. Show the protagonist to have a relationship with or bias to the characters around him/her. Otherwise? Awesome. Please write more! :D JackalRobot 18:10, 20 November 2011 (UTC)
