Haganah AZA (GMR)

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Revision as of 20:11, 11 April 2011

Haganah AZA #2379 or Haganah for short is an AZA chapter located in Skokie, Illinois. It serves the suburbs of Skokie, Evanston, Wilmette, Lincolnwood, and Glencoe, an area that is collectively known as Skevanstonettewoodcoe, around Chicago as part of the Great Midwest Region. Its chapter mascot is Scooby Doo and its chapter colors are black and silver. Its website is haganah.webs.com

Leadership

Chapter Officers

• Aleph Godol: Alex "Sincy" Sincere
• Aleph S'gan: Josh "No drinks" Whitsil
• Aleph Moreh: Ross "Look at me I'm Ross" Drucker
• Aleph Shaliach: Daniel "Chief Minister of Coolness" Thirman
• Aleph Mazkir: Judah "Give me my green pen" Schvimer"
• Aleph Gizbor: Yoni "Better yet Wacka Flacka" Solomonow
• Aleph Sopher: Jon "Not Here"Soifer
• Aleph Kohen Godol: Eric "Biggie" Miller

Advisors

David Stock is one of Haganah's advisor. He is a volunteer who gives of his time to help interpret BBYO policy as well as work with the elected officers to guide the chapter. David attends a majority of chapter events and is available as a resource and mentor to all Haganah's members.

Zach Wachs As Haganah’s Kohen Godol Sam Zuckert once said, “Look at him he is uneducated, he doesn’t have a penny to his name, and he spends his weekend hanging around with teenage boys.” That is a mostly partially accurate description of why Wachs should be advisor of the year. Clearly, there are better things he could be doing; he could be going somewhere where people don’t laugh at the words poop, vagina, penis, and any derivation off any of those words. However, he chooses to spend his time hanging around with us. He puts aside his social life and everything else, to come join us every so often. However, even if he can’t make it he’ll always make sure there is a parent there. But mainly he is able to connect with us and speak our language as he said in his own words, “Where’s the meeting at, g”, clearly he goes the extra mile, not only is he there, but he talks in a manner that today’s youth speak in. In doing so he is able to establish a deeper rapport between him the rest of Haganah. This is most important because any one armed blind monkey could come and sit and watch us making sure any of us are seriously killed, however it takes a special kind of advisor to keep us alive and be our friends, or perhaps even a brother, though he would be that brother who is like ten years older than you, but he still lives in his parents’ house and it seems that he is never going to actually get his life going.

History

Haganah has a history of being complete penises. It is said that no one in all BBYO inc. enjoys hanging out with Haganah. Since 1993, the chapter has been a virtually annual Henry Monsky Honor Roll award winner. and at International Convention 2001, Chapter Aleph Joshua Garfinkel was elected Grand Aleph Godol. It has been said that everyone in Haganah highly enjoys sucking on large penises :).In addition to this, Haganah won GMR's Invite competition for the eleven years prior to 2009, when the judges thought that Haganah was too good and would never be beaten, so they let another chapter win. Because of these reasons and many more, Haganah is widely known as the undisputed most annoying chapter in the history of GMR.