Mojo philter
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'dick in a box!' from the hilarious Andy Samberg SNL routine. | 'dick in a box!' from the hilarious Andy Samberg SNL routine. | ||
In 2001 a fresh-faced young mojo was unceremoniously kicked off the very first Internet Forum he joined within 24 hours for the always heinous crime of A.A.I.Q.A.J, asking an innocent question about j00s. Mojo scratched his wonderfully luxurious head of hair, farted, and reflected on why certain people are such an hysterically protected species like the Saltmarsh topminnow, (Fundulus jenkinsi) or the Key Largo woodrat, (Neotoma floridana smalli). | In 2001 a fresh-faced young mojo was unceremoniously kicked off the very first Internet Forum he joined within 24 hours for the always heinous crime of A.A.I.Q.A.J, asking an innocent question about j00s. Mojo scratched his wonderfully luxurious head of hair, farted, and reflected on why certain people are such an hysterically protected species like the Saltmarsh topminnow, (Fundulus jenkinsi) or the Key Largo woodrat, (Neotoma floridana smalli). | ||
| - | Much later, armed only with a bag of Doritos and a 2 liter Diet Coke mojo gave teh forum thing another try. Initially intimidated by the (at that time) high-toned discussion, he lurked at Liberty Forum for months before he finally cinched his Jethro Bodeen rope belt tighter and signed on. Hilarity ensued and good times were had by all... but, in mid 2004 unable to login during one of the legendary LF server meltdowns, mojo changed his handle to billy_boatrocker. Commentators have suggested that handle is a more accurate | + | Much later, armed only with a bag of Doritos and a 2 liter Diet Coke mojo gave teh forum thing another try. Initially intimidated by the (at that time) high-toned discussion, he lurked at Liberty Forum for months before he finally cinched his Jethro Bodeen rope belt tighter and signed on. Hilarity ensued and good times were had by all... but, in mid 2004 unable to login during one of the legendary LF server meltdowns, mojo changed his handle to billy_boatrocker. Commentators have suggested that handle is a much more accurate description of his whimsically strange passive-agressive personality, but when asked, mojo/billy said, " Uh, I dunno." |
| - | Imbibing | + | Imbibing deeply of the intoxicatingly Pirean LF wisdom, a tired billy after 2000+ posts felt LF had devolved into either, a. an endless marathon of stale cosmic pizza theories, or b. lewd and pulsating banality in it's highest and lowest forms at the same time. So, being a simple lad and justifiably confused, he bowed out like a true pro. |
When asked by an adoring media at his retirement press conference why he was hanging up his spikes while still at the top of his game, a tearful billy said." I don't worry about the things I can control, because I can control them, and I don't worry about the things I can't control because I can't control them." | When asked by an adoring media at his retirement press conference why he was hanging up his spikes while still at the top of his game, a tearful billy said." I don't worry about the things I can control, because I can control them, and I don't worry about the things I can't control because I can't control them." | ||
Revision as of 05:20, 24 December 2006
Mojo is an enigma wrapped in a mystery on a sesame seed bun. A forty-something Californian from the 'Silicon Valley' he now lives in Valparaiso, Chile where his most recent contribution to Chilean culture is the catchy phrase, 'mierda de perro no es cultura.' Like Bo Jackson he talks about himself in the Third Person and unlike Bo frequently sings out loud in public the words 'dick in a box!' from the hilarious Andy Samberg SNL routine. In 2001 a fresh-faced young mojo was unceremoniously kicked off the very first Internet Forum he joined within 24 hours for the always heinous crime of A.A.I.Q.A.J, asking an innocent question about j00s. Mojo scratched his wonderfully luxurious head of hair, farted, and reflected on why certain people are such an hysterically protected species like the Saltmarsh topminnow, (Fundulus jenkinsi) or the Key Largo woodrat, (Neotoma floridana smalli). Much later, armed only with a bag of Doritos and a 2 liter Diet Coke mojo gave teh forum thing another try. Initially intimidated by the (at that time) high-toned discussion, he lurked at Liberty Forum for months before he finally cinched his Jethro Bodeen rope belt tighter and signed on. Hilarity ensued and good times were had by all... but, in mid 2004 unable to login during one of the legendary LF server meltdowns, mojo changed his handle to billy_boatrocker. Commentators have suggested that handle is a much more accurate description of his whimsically strange passive-agressive personality, but when asked, mojo/billy said, " Uh, I dunno." Imbibing deeply of the intoxicatingly Pirean LF wisdom, a tired billy after 2000+ posts felt LF had devolved into either, a. an endless marathon of stale cosmic pizza theories, or b. lewd and pulsating banality in it's highest and lowest forms at the same time. So, being a simple lad and justifiably confused, he bowed out like a true pro. When asked by an adoring media at his retirement press conference why he was hanging up his spikes while still at the top of his game, a tearful billy said." I don't worry about the things I can control, because I can control them, and I don't worry about the things I can't control because I can't control them."
