SSAP

From Popwiki


This super-secret page contains tools for use by Uncyclopedia administrators only. If you are not an admin, please close your browser NOW.

Template:Wilde

Contents

Article deletion

Template:Tl This tool is used as the first step to decide whether to huff individual newly-created article stubs on sight:

heads
deface
tails
delete
edge
nominate on VFH
Template:Coin

Editing and page protection

Template:Tl If an article survived the previous step, decide here how to deface it beyond recognition:

and:

  • Clubs - club the user into unconsciousness
  • Hearts - take 'em and break 'em *blush*
  • Spades - shovel some more rubbish in there
  • Diamonds - sell 'em out to the highest bidder
Template:Card

Random bannination

Template:Tl This tool is used to decide the fate of individual editors on Uncyclopedia after randomly trashing their fine contributions:

  1. - ban user for life and revert all posts
  2. - arbitrarily ban user for life
  3. - ban user for some random duration and go back to sleep
  4. - replace user's posts with Template:Random Swearing swearwords
  5. - seek out and and revert all of user's edits
  6. - ignore user completely and maybe they'll go away
Template:Die

Featured article

Template:Tl This tool is used if any text is left intact, to decide whether to nominate what's left of the article for VFH or VFP:

File:Slots-cherry.gifFile:Slots-cherry.gifFile:Slots-cherry.gif Nominate for VFH
File:Slots-pineapple.gifFile:Slots-pineapple.gifFile:Slots-pineapple.gif Nominate for VFP
File:Slots-bar2.gif or File:Slots-bar3.gif Just kidding, go ahead and ban user forever!
Template:Slots

Misc cabal actions

Template:Tl Instructions for interpretation are on Admin Secret Form E-317a, pages 17-338.

A non-admin user is always represented as a white pawn. Admin pieces are black.
If surrounded by pawns, user has been PWNED.
If surrounded by rooks, user must go to jail. Go directly to jail.
If surrounded by knights, user has been SLAIN and fed to dragons.
If surrounded by bishops reciting last rites, user is to be blown back to Gosh.
If user is surrounded by queens, s/he is to be handed over to the fashion police.
If user is surrounded by burger kings, would you like fries with that?
Template:Chess


If all else fails

Ban the user for vandalising a protected page. Seeming as though you have (almost) absolute power, no-one will ask how the user managed to do this in the first place.


This super-secret page contained tools for use by Uncyclopedia administrators only. If you are an admin from some other site or a spy from Template:C and you read this page anyway, oh boy, you're in for it, eh?

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