Staplers in the Night

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Revision as of 16:11, 6 July 2007

First of many.

Cast: Derrek MacKnox, Orville Smith, Thomas MacKnox, Janice MacKnox, Mr. Whiskers, Leroy Jennings, Charles Jennings, Bob Spatel, The Staplers, Margaret Unoparola, Brenda Roberts, Jimothy Muller, Steakhouse Guy

Running Time: 7:00

Locations: Sidewalk, MacKnox House, Mayor's Office, Schoolyard, Classroom

Page Title: Staplers in the Night!

Transcript

(a foot steps on a bag of Funyuns which moves across the screen to reveal Derrek walking down the street, cut to front view of Derrek)

DERREK: Huh, Banjo City. Why would anyone name an entire city after banjos?

ORVILLE: {walks in} Well son, I can answer that! You see, when the founders of this town moved away from Indianapolis in 1950, they were obsessed with banjos for some reason I do not know. And so they started a town. They were prob'ly insane. And they started a town and they named it Banjo City, even though it has no suburbs and it's twenty miles from all other civilizations.

DERREK: That makes absolutely no sense.

ORVILLE: Don't you sass back at me, you young whippersnapper! {hits Derrek over the head with a banjo}

DERREK: Augh!

(cue intro)

(cut to MacKnox house, doorbell rings)

DERREK: Here comes the welcome wagon!

TOM: {runs through living room, opens door}

ORVILLE: Hello there, neighbors! {holds out hunk of tinfoil} Would you like a plump, Christmas goose?

TOM: Um... Okay... {takes hunk of tinfoil, unwraps it to reveal a potato with "GOOSE" carved into it}

JANICE: Who was it, Tom?

TOM: Oh, just the neighbors, Janice. They gave us a plump Christmas potato.

(cut to dinner table)

DERREK: Uh...

JANICE: Derrek, just eat your goose.

MR. WHISKERS: {walks in, meows}

DERREK: We need to feed Mr. Whiskers.

TOM: {hops out of chair, runs out of the room} I'm going out to look for work now! {opens and closes the door offscreen}

(cut to zoom in of mayor's office, cut to inside)

LEROY: {waves} Hey there, son. Welcome to my workplace! Now son, {points to stapler} this is a stapler.

CHARLES: I know what a stapler is, Dad.

LEROY: Now staplers can be very handy tools or they can cost you the use of your legs. {holds hand up to mouth} Bob, come here and show my son what happened to you in the stapler mishap.

(pan to Bob standing on knees)

BOB: Using me as a means of safety education makes me uncomfortable in my working environment.

(pan back to Leroy)

LEROY: {sighs} I need a new assistant. Things just haven't been the same since your accident, Bob. I wish life were like one of those sitcoms where you say something like, "I need a new assistant," you know, and one just shows up, you know? Too bad life's not like that. Man, I need a new assistant.

TOM: {opens door} Hi, I'm here to inquire about your "Assistant wanted" sign.

LEROY: {holds out documents} Ooh, fantastic! Sign here, sign here, here, here, here and possibly here!

BOB: {offscreen} Um... Could I get a slight raise considering that my calves are stapled to my thighs?

LEROY: Hush Bob.

(cut to stars and moon with lettering reading LATER THAT NIGHT, comet hits moon and moon falls, cut to Charles' closet, staplers come out and crowd around Charles' bed)

CHARLES: What do you- What do you want from me?

STAPLERS: We want your legs!

CHARLES: AAAAAIIIEEEEEEEE! {pulls blanket up over head}

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Notes

• "Staplers in the Night" is a parody of "Strangers in the Night".
• This is the only episode that doesn't actually have a plot.

Easter Eggs

• During the intro sequence, click Orville to see a redone version of the opening scene.
• During the intro sequence, put your mouse over and press your mouse down on Jim's Nintendo DS to see different things take its place.
• At the end, click the banjo to hear Derrek's debut album.

External Links

Watch Staplers in the Night