Piccolo

From Peckingorder

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[edit] Team Four Star

Piccolo is a demon who teams up with Goku to fight Raditz. Goku apparently thinks he's a Yoshi (Episode 2).

After the fight with Raditz, Piccolo takes Gohan into his care and trains him, mostly by beating him up while yelling "DODGE!" (Episode 5). Piccolo also calls Gohan a NERD when Gohan says something "nerdy". During this time, Piccolo destroys the moon (while yelling "MOON!!!" (Episode 10 part 1)) because he thinks the moon is mocking him (Episode 4).

During the fight with Nappa, Piccolo tries to get Gohan and Krillin to cooperate with him in a joint attack against Nappa. Piccolo warns Gohan to attack Nappa before he has time to DODGE; when Piccolo says this word, Gohan remembers his training and becomes frightened; Piccolo blames Ivan Pavlov for this (Episode 8).

When Nappa attacks Gohan, Piccolo runs in the way of Nappa's attack, but realizes too late that he could simply have grabbed Gohan and ran away. Piccolo's final words to Gohan are "Why didn't you DODGE???" (Episode 9).

[edit] WeeklyTubeShow

Piccolo is considered the central character of these dubs. His character here deviates significantly from the original; here, he talks like a stereotypical black man would and seems to be obsessed with his ding-a-ling (traits later extended to other Namekians in the series).

[edit] Childhood

Piccolo is the offspring of the Ding-a-Ling King Piccolo. Before his death, the Ding-a-Ling King spawned the younger Piccolo from an egg with the objective to find a "big ol' band-aid" for the hole that Goku punched through him earlier (DragonDub Z: The Prelude).

[edit] Beginnings

He first appeared interrupting the Z-Fighters' orgy at Kame House, where Piccolo ranted about how McDonalds put pickles on his cheeseburger. Piccolo challenged Goku to see whose dick was smoother, but Goku had an appointment and could not do it (Piccolo the Pimp). This never actually happens; when seeing Goku for the final time in hell, Piccolo remarks that "that day ain't ever gonna come" (DragonDub Pack).

Piccolo often talks about his shine - at one point, he fought another Piccolo (referred to at the end as the old Piccolo) who was more like the canonical Piccolo and did not possess shine (Respect Piccolo's Shine). Piccolo once borrowed some toys from Raditz, but ate them instead; as these toys were made of poop, Raditz called Piccolo a poop-eater; Raditz also claimed that his hair could "woosh" better than Piccolo's cape (Game Over For Piccolo). However, this incident was not truly game over for Piccolo.

Piccolo has tried to "lay a beating" on Super Android 13, claiming that green dick was better than blue dick (Piccolo Lays a Beating) and has had an altercation with Salza, who claims that Piccolo's ding-a-ling will "haunt his dreams forever" (Piccolo Stretches It). Freeza, in his second form, earned Piccolo's ire when he referred to Piccolo as "another lazy N-word" (DragonDub Pack).

[edit] Piccolo versus the Saiyans

Piccolo later teamed up with the Z-Fighters to face off against Vegeta and Nappa. Piccolo ridicules the Saiyans for wearing sunglasses over one eye; Vegeta replies that it costs $1,000 for "one of those fucking things" (Nappa paid $2,000). Piccolo says that Vegeta looks like Sonic the Hedgehog; Vegeta responds by saying Piccolo looks like a cucumber. Nappa threatens to squeeze Piccolo's balls, which, according to Nappa, would cause a small explosion because Piccolo's balls are tiny. In response to Nappa's claim, Piccolo got ready to pull out his dick and stick it in Vegeta's mouth, prompting Vegeta to say "ooooh" (Piccolo Meets Vegeta the Fabulous). Piccolo thinks Vegeta sounded like "he actually wanted that shit in his mouth". Piccolo stated that, if Vegeta really wanted it so badly, Piccolo would oblige him. Gohan whimpers "Mr. Piccolo..." before being told by Piccolo to shut up; Piccolo also tells Krillin to shut up, even though Krillin didn't say anything. Piccolo asks Vegeta and Nappa to "stop dickin' around", which makes Vegeta and Nappa laugh (Dickin' Around).

[edit] Absence

Piccolo was abducted by Android 20 as a result of his ding-a-ling obsession (Enough With Piccolo). Piccolo returned during a fight against second-form Freeza, but just as he was about to announce how happy he was to be back, he was interrupted by Kanye West (Welcome Back, Piccolo). Along the way, Piccolo met Nail, who gave him some "real spiritual shit", including a story about a frog being born out of its daddy's bootyhole. Piccolo fused with Nail and, as a result, saw a double rainbow all the way, across the sky (Piccolo's Epiphany).

[edit] Piccolo versus the Androids

Piccolo was with the rest of the Z-Fighters in Kame House when the Androids attacked. The Androids wanted Goku, but because Goku was not in Kame House, the Androids decided to just kill everyone. Piccolo tried to distract Android 17 by trying to get him onto another island so that he could "merc" 17's ass. When that failed, Piccolo invited 17 into the house for a bowl of Cocoa Puffs. Right after Piccolo's attempts failed, Krillin convinced 17 to move to the other island by saying 17 would get sand in his shoes if he stayed on the Kame House island (Piccolo: Master Persuader). On the other island, Piccolo calls Android 16 "Frankenstein" and, when 16 says that he is "sixteen", Piccolo misinterprets this (willingly or otherwise) as "sixteen years old". When 17 corrects Piccolo, Piccolo snaps at him because he "ain't but seventeen wit' [his] young ass". Piccolo asks 16 if he works at Chick-Fil-A and states that 16 reminds him of someone who works there who looked just like the large android, except without the clothes and with freckles. Piccolo states that he didn't want someone with freckles handling his food because he relates having freckles to having "pepper" on his skin. Piccolo pisses off 17 by saying that he has "sand in his pussy" and, when 17 says "Don't talk to me like that, I'm a grown man", Piccolo replies that he's only 17 (Thinkin' You Grown). Despite his disdain for Android 17, Piccolo thinks he looks "fine as hell" and is implied to have anally penetrated him (and went "straight to jail" for it). (Only 17, Pal).

During this time frame, Piccolo tells the Androids about a cripple that he knew "one time, in middle school" (Freeza in his first form). Freeza threatened to whoop someone's ass for attempting to put him in a full nelson and do him up the ass; Piccolo said Freeza couldn't do anything, because he was crippled (Piccolo Is Nonsense).

[edit] Relationship with Kami

Piccolo's relationship with his uncle, Kami, is usually tense. Kami paid Piccolo a visit and tried to convince him to become the new Guardian of Earth, but Piccolo told Kami to suck a fat dick (Kami Pays a Visit). Piccolo later visited Kami's Lookout to complain about how bad his Valentine's Day was. Kami asked Piccolo why he couldn't get a valentine and Piccolo says that it's because he's green. Kami has Piccolo play a role-playing game, where Mr. Popo plays the part of "the bitch" that Piccolo must seduce. Piccolo instead tries to convince the bitch to take a ride on his "horse" (which Mr. Popo thinks is a euphemism for ding-a-ling, although Piccolo assures him that "horse is a euphemism for horse"). Kami gets angry at Piccolo and tells him to get the hell off his lookout (Piccolo's Horse). When Piccolo returns to the lookout, Kami orders him to leave. Piccolo busts some rhymes about Kami being gay and having a floppy ding-a-ling, but Kami is furious and says that he is sick of Piccolo's shit. Piccolo states that he is sorry and appears sincere, but instantly reverts to his earlier behavior (Piccolo Is Not Welcome).

[edit] Rapeman

The Rapeman is a superhero who dispenses justice by penetration. As the Rapeman has the same voice, vocabulary, and catchphrases as Piccolo (both of them referring to themselves as the ding-a-ling man), it is very probable that the Rapeman is an alter-ego of Piccolo.

[edit] Catchphrases

Piccolo has several catchphrases, many of them shared amongst other members of his family:

  • "Shut the fuck up and listen", also used by the Ding-a-Ling King Piccolo and Kami
  • "Oh shit motherfucker!", also used by the Ding-a-Ling King Piccolo
  • "I'm Piccolo, motherfucker"
  • "Green dick is better than blue dick"
  • "Run run run, as fast as you can, you can't catch me, I'm the ding-a-ling man!"
  • "It's ding-a-ling time!" (as the Rapeman)
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