Lost Butterfly Maiden
From Lavosbyssals
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(→i live no more to shame nor me nor you;) |
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Bought: <br> | Bought: <br> | ||
==i live no more to shame nor me nor you;== | ==i live no more to shame nor me nor you;== | ||
| - | <b>Cynis Falen Jalide | + | <b>Cynis Falen Jalide</b>- Air Aspect sorcerer of a little over half a century in age, Sarien's most hated sibling, subject of his nightmares, and pretty much THE biggest influence on him. Sadistic, cruel, manipulative, obsessive, possessive and just all around a horrible person, Jalide has basically made his younger brother dance on his puppet strings for almost two decades. Rape, manipulation, threats, and carefully applied psychological torture are just a few of the tools he's used against Sarien over the years: and as bad as it's been, it's only going to get worse. |
| - | <b>Cynis Falen Lianna | + | |
| - | <b>Cathak Gaius Gan Ning | + | Jalide is a little over six and a half feet tall, handsome yet cruel-looking, with long (somewhat past his shoulders) white hair and green eyes, very obviously an Air Aspect of impeccable breeding, physically imposing and powerful in build, with a rich, confident baritone voice, carrying himself with perfect, unshakeable confidence. His main resemblance to Sarien comes in the startling color of his eyes: otherwise, the two siblings don't resemble one another. He dresses finely, in dark colors, tasteful and elegant. |
| + | |||
| + | <b>Cynis Falen Lianna</b>-One of Sarien's younger siblings, a recently Exalted Wood Aspect of about fourteen, who is now being groomed to attend the Heptagram, she is the only one of his immediate family who Sarien actually likes-in fact, he is quite protective of her, and while he is willing to let bad things happen to him, for being used to it, he <I>will</I> react violently should he find out anyone has harmed her, or tried to harm her. Soft-spoken, kind, sweet, yet strong-willed, Lianna has strangely been not afraid of her publicly unstable older brother, and Sarien has never learned why. | ||
| + | |||
| + | Lianna is a slim, willowy girl with blond hair and green eyes, white roses growing entwined in her long hair, fairly pretty, a Wood Aspect of impeccable breeding, of slender yet wiry build: while she hasn't reached her full growth yet, she promises to be quite tall once she's done growing. She smiles and laughs frequently, sings often-she is a masterful singer-who dresses in white and pink (especially pink) very often. | ||
| + | |||
| + | <b>Cathak Gaius Gan Ning</b>-best/only friend, lover, and unfortunately apparently quite deceased, Gan Ning was two years older then Sarien, who was one of the few people who cared about him-in fact, loved him. Gan Ning's death, which happened a relatively short time ago, shattered Sarien and from which he has never recovered. However, things may not be just as they appear... | ||
==sing what you can't say;== | ==sing what you can't say;== | ||
Revision as of 16:23, 6 July 2007
Lost Butterfly Maiden is a Daybreak Caste played by Lynne.
died for the beauty the one in the garden;
Age: 19
Birthdate: Calibration, RY 749
Birthplace: The Imperial City
Hair: Red
Eyes: Green
Skin: Ghostly pale
Height: 5' 11"
Weight: 130 lbs (including hair).
Image Song: Nightwish, "Dead Boy's Poem"
failed in becoming a god;
He was never quite good enough. Small and fragile, wide-eyed and too pretty for his own good, Sarien was never particularly good at anything as a child. Except, that is, for warming his elder brother Jalide's bed: his sadistic, manipulative sorcerer of an elder brother took a fancy to him, and took what he wanted, bending and breaking his younger brother to his will, shattering his self-esteem and self-worth, and to this day, that is part of how Sarien defines himself. To add to this, despite his impeccable breeding, despite the fact that every single other one of his siblings Exalted, Sarien was a child that not even the Dragons could love: he was never touched by the Dragons, never Exalted, remained a mortal. A crazy, broken, lost little mortal child, whose mental weakness, who was unable to be strong and stand up to his brother had made him remain merely mortal, without even the minor protection that the Exaltation would have given him from his brother.
The family knew.
And no one, no one with any power to stop Jalide, intervened. Because a broken mortal child meant nothing, nothing at all.
But mortal and insane as he was, Sarien was still, nonetheless, a very intelligent child. And so he could have had some use (other then being his brother's de facto concubine). Sarien was, therefore, sent to the House of Bells in hopes that he would somehow turn out worth something, that his death would bring the honor that his life didn't, knowing the entire time that he was a child that not even the Dragons could love. Ironically, his greatest gift, his extraordinary gift for tactics, was discovered, purely by accident. He understood tactics as easily as a fish swam in water. But it did not matter: he was merely mortal, no chance to prove himself.
During his time at the House of Bells, he was befriended by a boy about two years older, a fellow mortal Dynast by the name of Cathak Gaius Gan Ning, who had gained admission in a similar fashion as Sarien, with a combination of bribes, passing the tests, and his tactical genius. The two were close friends during those years, fellow outcasts: Sarien being both unExalted and insane, though less crazy then during his childhood, and Gan Ning being unExalted, who kicked ass with their collective tactical genius. Gan Ning was the first person Sarien slept with other then Jalide, the first who showed him pleasure instead of pain, one of the few people who truly loved him: however, while Gan Ning suspected a great deal about Sarien's past, he got no straight answer out of the younger boy.
Unfortunately, Gan Ning was later sent to Greyfalls post-graduation from the House of Bells through the machinations of an unknown party but who was most likely Jalide, where he fought lots of evil things...and apparently died fighting an insane Anathema known as the God-King. His body was not found, while the Anathema was found with a separated head, decapitated with a broken straight sword. The news sent Sarien, whose new semi-sanity was only tenous, back into a downward spiral from which he never recovered, retreating back into madness. With nothing left to hold onto. Nothing left to keep him.
It was the last loss in a life of losses and pain, a life that did nothing but take and take and take and take without giving back anything, that the one time he did have something bright and beautiful it was taken from him, and it was this last loss that finally sent him over.
On his nineteenth birthday-Calibration, RY 568-Sarien attempted suicide, while temporarily away from the Blessed Isle. But the chance for death, too, was taken from him, when he Exalted as a Daybreak Caste, one of the Psychopomps. He accepted this new fate like he had come to accept everything else, with a sweet empty smile, went through the training, and took up his duties.
The name he took-Lost Butterfly Maiden-has more then a touch of irony about it, especially since he is not a maiden, even as a girl, except in the sense that he is unmarried. But he flutters through the shadows, lost beautiful and mad, a lost broken butterfly-doll-child.
this dying music my loveletter to nobody;
Most people see only the outside shell that Sarien presents to the world: the hedonistic, sybaritic Cynis, so typical of others of his House, a pretty little wanton slut, as well as drunk most of the time. Often childlike in personality, and so very out of it, he seems as though he is either high on bright morning or had his mind fried by too many drugs, all the time. Part of that is true: Sarien is indeed drunk, or attempting to get drunk most of the time, as well as a hedonist (of sorts), but he's nowhere as shallow as he seems. Or even happy. He hates himself, deep down inside, lacks inner peace or even a focus most of the time. He cannot stand the idea of anyone else being hurt like he was, surprisingly compassionate for a member of House Cynis, a master of the laughing mask. He is too gentle and too compassionate for the world he was born into, more sweet then he ever should have been, and it breaks his already-broken heart into shards to witness the suffering of the world.
An unstable genius and expert tactician, Sarien's moods swing wildly, and he tends toward melancholy and depression, with no self-esteem or self-worth, with too much compassion besides: he puts more value in others then he does in himself. He knows that he is pretty, and sometimes down deep, believes that's all he is, the pretty shell (pretty yet never shone, only barely glowed). To try to erase the emptiness and depression he feels, he turns to alcohol and sex, though consciencely, he tries to deny that being the reason and tries to simply explain it as that he likes pleasure. Part of his desperation to bury himself in sex and have as many lovers as he can, is to try to erase, somehow, his memories of being a child, of being his elder brother Jalide's plaything.
He can enjoy it for a little while. And then, sometimes, afterwards, he weeps, when his partner(s) are asleep and cannot see him cry.
Sarien is also weak-willed, impulsive, prone to outbursts and behavior dangerous to himself, innately self-destructive, passively suicidal and with a clear submissive streak: he cannot say no, do anything for you he would, especially if it's related to sex, unless it involves hurting another person or those he cares about, is basically almost, if not completely, incapable of informed consent. Because, after all, he reasons, his body doesn't even really belong to him anymore, if ever it did in the first place, so what does it really matter? He's also incapable of setting outside limits for himself, sexually speaking: unless a partner puts their foot down and insists that enough is enough, he could be sore and bleeding and in no physical shape for sex, and yet try to seduce them into more. He has, and does, fake pleasure when he is not enjoying himself but believes it would please his partner(s) to think that he was enjoying himself: he relies on acting and facades a great deal.
At his worst, most melancholy, he cannot even summon up the will to get out of bed, though he disguises it by simply pretending he's lazy. He profoundly believes at the core of him that he is not only weak and worthless, but that it was his fault for everything that happened to him, that he is a whore, good for nothing but gratifying others' every desire, that what was done to him wasn't rape, that he consented somehow, that he wanted it. In many ways, he is still the frightened wounded child who both never grew up and grew up too fast, all at the same time. Lost, fragile of mind and heart and soul, he truly is Ophelia, wandering down secret halls and corridors, all alone.
He is an extraordinarily affectionate young man, especially considering everything that has been done to him, with an extraordinary amount of love to give, and equally affection-starved: however, he does not want to be loved or cared for, believing that he does not deserve it. That any chance he ever had for love was taken away from him, because who would ever want him if they knew what Jalide had done to him?
never sigh for better world;
Sarien is a slender, slight, young man, who looks to be about fourteen or fifteen, of about 5'11" though with such a slight build that he appears smaller, delicate-looking and not at all physically imposing. He looks to be a Dynast of impeccable breeding, and is unusually pale, with almost translucent, alabaster skin, easily bruised and marked, rather ghostly-looking with very long, thick, silky bright red hair that he usually keeps tied back into a long ponytail (unbound it falls to the ground), and deep, wide, startlingly green eyes, dressing most often in green, favoring fluttery, delicate, translucent, filmy silk robes that conceal barely anything and leave almost nothing up to the imagination, and a dark cloak, with both ears pierced: he wears delicate, finely worked earrings. He possesses a soulsteel chain shirt and a slim, light soulsteel reaper daiklave, crafted in such a way as to suit his delicate frame, and not overwhelm him. While tall, he is tiny of frame, with small hands and feet, far too thin for his own good, but proportioned in such a way that his slenderness only adds to his appeal, rather then subtracts, long-limbed and graceful. Delicately lovely, with breakable, otherworldly beauty, but surprisingly strong for someone who seems so fragile and frail (not to say that he is very strong, because he isn't), he is usually to be found smiling, a sweet smile: what most people don't see is that it's a false smile, that never seems to quite reach his eyes, because he long ago forgot how to really smile, a sweetly broken childlike smile. He carries himself with perfect, floating grace, somehow a vulnerable grace, attempting to project a false confidence and easygoing nature that is nothing but a facade.
He looks more like a porcelain doll then anything real, hauntingly beautiful and breakable and oh so delicate, a pretty toy more then a person, the sort of looks that could inspire dark thoughts of posession and covetousness in a good number of people, and have. He has the 'break me, use me, shatter me' look written all over him. Sweet-voiced, with a soft, musical low alto voice, he is easily mistaken for a woman. Or would be, if it wasn't for the fact his clothes reveal his lack of womanly curves.
As a woman, he appears much the same: too thin to have much in the way of breasts, with narrow, boyish hips, Girl!Sarien is just as androgynous as her usual self. Her lack of curves is less a masculine tendency, then simply the fact that she is much too thin for her own good, both as a girl and as a boy, and there just isn't enough there to have curves.
so much to live for so much to die for;
Name: Cynis Falen Sarien/Lost Butterfly Maiden
Caste: Daybreak
Concept: little child lost
Motivation:
Intimacies: Cynis Falen Lianna, belief that no one will ever want or love him if they knew about his past, belief that it was his fault and that he deserved all the abuse that he got, belief that he is weak and worthless and that he does not deserve to be loved or cared for, the innocent and helpless
Anima banner: shimmering black and shadow-silver wings that spread from his shoulders
Theme: "Dead Boy's Poem", Nightwish
Attributes:
Str: 2
Dex: 5
Sta: 2
Cha: 2
Man: 2
App: 4
Per: 2
Int: 5
Wits: 4
Caste Skills: Investigation 3, Occult 4 (Necromancy +1), Lore 3, Craft 2 (Craft: Air and Craft: Water), Medicine 1
Favored Skills: Melee 3, Awareness 5, War 5 (Tactics +3), Performance 4, Dodge 5
Other Skills: Linguistics 3 (Native: High Realm, Low Realm, Riverspeak, Old Realm), Martial Arts 1, Resistance 3, Archery 1, Ride 1, Presence 1, Socialize 3, Athletics 3
Virtues:
Compassion: 5
Conviction: 1
Temperance: 1
Valor: 4
Virtue Flaw: Heart of Tears
Limit: 0/10
Willpower: 5
Essence: 3
Essence Pool:
Backgrounds:
Whispers 3
Artifact 3 (soulsteel reaper daiklave (Daylight Falls), soulsteel hearthstone bracers, soulsteel chain shirt, soulsteel collar of dawn's cleansing light)
Manse 3 (Stone of Gender-Transformation)
Necromancy 1
Merits:
Tactical Instincts
Flaws:
Nightmares
Derangement: Melancholia
Derangement: Delusions
Enemy: 3 (Cynis Falen Jalide)
Addiction: alcohol
Addiction: sex
Conviction Vice: Cynis Falen Jalide (autofails Conviction rolls when he is confronted by his brother/in the same area as him)
Valor Vice (-2 to Valor): again vs. Jalide.
JB: 9
DDV: 9
PDV: 6
MDV: 4
MPV: 3
Charms:
Resistance: Ox-Body Technique x 1
War: 2nd War Excellency, Mob-Dispersing Rebuke
Dodge: 3rd Dodge Excellency, Shadow Over Water (Abyssal equivalent)
Melee: 2nd Melee Excellency
Performance: Second Performance Excellency
Occult: Shadowlands Circle Necromancy
Necromancy: Iron Countermagic, Shattered Void Mirror, Dusk Eyes, Gentle Call of Lethe, Midnight Shadow Sun
if only my heart had a home;
Total XP: 5
Unspent: 5
Spent: 0
Bought:
i live no more to shame nor me nor you;
Cynis Falen Jalide- Air Aspect sorcerer of a little over half a century in age, Sarien's most hated sibling, subject of his nightmares, and pretty much THE biggest influence on him. Sadistic, cruel, manipulative, obsessive, possessive and just all around a horrible person, Jalide has basically made his younger brother dance on his puppet strings for almost two decades. Rape, manipulation, threats, and carefully applied psychological torture are just a few of the tools he's used against Sarien over the years: and as bad as it's been, it's only going to get worse.
Jalide is a little over six and a half feet tall, handsome yet cruel-looking, with long (somewhat past his shoulders) white hair and green eyes, very obviously an Air Aspect of impeccable breeding, physically imposing and powerful in build, with a rich, confident baritone voice, carrying himself with perfect, unshakeable confidence. His main resemblance to Sarien comes in the startling color of his eyes: otherwise, the two siblings don't resemble one another. He dresses finely, in dark colors, tasteful and elegant.
Cynis Falen Lianna-One of Sarien's younger siblings, a recently Exalted Wood Aspect of about fourteen, who is now being groomed to attend the Heptagram, she is the only one of his immediate family who Sarien actually likes-in fact, he is quite protective of her, and while he is willing to let bad things happen to him, for being used to it, he will react violently should he find out anyone has harmed her, or tried to harm her. Soft-spoken, kind, sweet, yet strong-willed, Lianna has strangely been not afraid of her publicly unstable older brother, and Sarien has never learned why.
Lianna is a slim, willowy girl with blond hair and green eyes, white roses growing entwined in her long hair, fairly pretty, a Wood Aspect of impeccable breeding, of slender yet wiry build: while she hasn't reached her full growth yet, she promises to be quite tall once she's done growing. She smiles and laughs frequently, sings often-she is a masterful singer-who dresses in white and pink (especially pink) very often.
Cathak Gaius Gan Ning-best/only friend, lover, and unfortunately apparently quite deceased, Gan Ning was two years older then Sarien, who was one of the few people who cared about him-in fact, loved him. Gan Ning's death, which happened a relatively short time ago, shattered Sarien and from which he has never recovered. However, things may not be just as they appear...
sing what you can't say;
forget what you can't play;
time will tell (this bitter farewell);
sing what you can`t say/forget what you can`t play/hasten to drown into beautiful eyes/walk within my poetry, this dying music/- my loveletter to nobody
