David Hessen

From Dash Mcwiki

Hello my name is Dave Hessen and I am really really gay. I like to fist men and do cleveland steamers with Broken cyde. I am in a one man band called Death Destroyer and all I do in that band is repeat banjo chords and grunt out my gay fantasies which involve me, Broken side, Bill Belichik, Tom Brady, Randy Moss, Nickleback, Hinder, and of course Drew Pickles all going into a gay bar and ordering a gay porno on Paper view and all of us masturbate to the gay porn and we swim in our giant sea of splooge and drink it all and piss it out into each others eyes, ears, and noses. Then we all take a massive shit all at once and we play in it for a whole week, until it is all dry and crusty and then we make them into poop chips and eat them and we go to the dildo store and we buy 1 million dildos and we shove them up each others asses and get them all covered in poopy and we lick the shit off and we get boners from all of our scat porn and we masturbate for hours upon hours then we lick up all the cum and we assrape each other and then I invite the members of The Jonas Brothers, Brokencyde, Nickelback, My Chemical Romance, Coldplay, Fall Out Boy, and Modest Mouse to quit their current bands, and join Death Destroyer, and they all do, and we record a song. It goes like this: Hello my name is David Hessen and I'm a big smelly homo Hello my name is David Hessen and I'm a big smelly homo Hello my name is David Hessen and I'm a big smelly homo oh shit i'm gay I'm gay because I like it that way bree bree I love to shove dildos up my rectum bree bree I like to rape men in the ass and give them cleveland steamers because it gives me a big pig boner and I rub it out to drew pickles porn. skin flute solo. bree bree im extremely fucking gay and I like it that way.