Stay at the party, but leave her

You walk away from her and try to enjoy the party.

"Come on, Jeffey," she comes back.

All of a sudden a guy who's 5'1" comes over to you and tries to act macho. "Is this asshole hitting on you, Annie?"

"Oh hi, Jeffey!" she says happily.

"Listen, little man," you tell him. "I don't have any Clearasil to clear those pimples by the Freshman Prom, so get the fuck away."

"Get away from my woman," he sneers.

"She's DRUNK! She thinks that I'm you."

"Don't you talk about Ann like that!" he screams. He dives at you.

You stick out a stiff arm and slam him to the ground. "Ahhhhhh," he moans.

I'm getting the fuck out of here, you tell yourself.