Die Hard

From Bluesockapedia

This page is loved by the Ninja Corp. Ninjas love this page, usually because it's just totally odd and or awesome. Tampering with this page in a major way will make the Ninjas unhappy. Ask the Piratees what that feels like.

Die Hard is a film about John McClane, the gun-toting, beer-swelling, potty mouthed rockstar, who goes and beats terrorists up, after they hatch a fiendish plan to blow up his recording studio. It's made me excited just telling you about the synopsis, I tell thee!

Contents 1 Plot 2 Reception 3 Quotes 4 Trivia 5 See also

Plot

John McClane (Mike Squires) is jammin'. Jammin' in his recording studio, when he receives an email from Grubby Hands (Hans Gruber - Grubby Hands, geddit?) informing him that he plans to blow up his recording studio, after he felt slightly disappointed about the 'pop' feel to McClane's latest album. McClane grabs his gun, and steps into the world, a world full or death and war - his kind of world.

McClane basically beats shit into every terrorist, with the usual funny one-liners, and uses heavy amounts of C4 to blow shit up. Finally, he duels on Guitar Hero II against Hands, and wins, when Hands gets friction burns on his knees from sliding across McClane's brand new nylon carpet. McClane then kills Hands, by shooting him in the head, whilst saying "Hurrah koom-bah, daddy fornicator!".

Reception

The film is applauded for it's non stop action, and blowing up of shit. Over 20,000 tonnes of C4 were used in the film. It is in fact God's favourite film.

Quotes

John McClane: "Okay Hands, you can choose the song I'll melt your face with on this Xbox 360 version of Guitar Hero II".
Grubby Hands: "Okay, McClane, I choose Wolfmother".
McClane: "NO!" [slaps] No over-rated Aussie music here, motherfucker!"

John McClane "Yippee-Ki-Yay Motherlover".

Trivia

• Based on a real story, based on the saga between Rich Costey and Muse over their album, Black Holes and Revelations.

See also

• Die 'Ard - a cockney film, starring Nick Pollard.