Page 186: Cartoon Riders
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We fade in on a shot of Peach Creek, the home of Ed, Edd, and Eddy. The camera zooms in until we're in front of a red house. This is the home of Eddy, the self-proclaimed leader of the trio of him and his 2 freinds, Ed and Edd. Two 13 year-old boys approach Eddy's front door, both carrying large, yellow envelopes. One is tall, has one eyebrow, and no chin. He wears a green jacket with a red-and-white stripped shirt underneath, a pair of blue-jeans, and black shoes. He is Ed. The other boy also is tall, wears a black sock over the top of his head like a hat, a red t-shirt, purple shorts, red socks, and red shoes. His name is Edd, but he is called "Double D" by almost everyone. Ed then kicks Eddy's door to get Eddy's attention, but do to his immensis physical strength, jams his foot right through the door. "Um, Ed?" Edd said to him. "Try the doorbell."
"Okay!" Ed declared with a stupid grin. Ed removed his foot from the door and rang the doorbell. A second later, another 13 year-old boy answered it. He was short, had 3 hairs on his head, wore a yellow t-shirt with a red verticle stripe on it and purple around the colar, light-blue blue-jeans, and red shoes. This is Eddy.
"Hey guys!" Eddy said to his freinds. "What's up?"
Well," Edd stated, holding up his envolope. "Edd and I just got these strange envelopes in the mail, and we were wondering if you got one, too."
"Buttered toast!" Ed blurted out randomly.
"You know," Eddy said, pulling a yellow envelope from behind his back. It was opened. "I did get an envelope like those. I opened it, and it had a DVD inside that said 'Play me'. I was just gonna play it. You guys wanna watch with me?"
"Sure!" Edd and Ed said in unison. They both went inside and plopped down on Eddy's couch. Eddy pressed "Play" on his DVD player, (the disk was already in and the TV was already on) and sat down on the couch with his freinds. The TV showed an image of a 13 year-old boy, with a screen floating in mid-air next to him. The boy had black hair that was a little long, and wore a black cloak with a white t-shirt and a pair of blue-jeans underneath.
"Greetings, Eddy McLarson," The boy on screen said. "If you're watching this, then let me be the first to say 'Congradulations"! You, along with your freinds, Eddward Tomson and Edwin Farns, (A/N:Made the last names up) who have receaved letters indenticle to this, have been invited to compete in the 1st anual World Air Board Racing Tornament."
"The World Air Board Racing Tornament?" The Eds asked in confusion.
Yes," The boy on screen said, as though he could hear them. "The World Air Board Racing Tornament. A special racing competition hosted by me, Gravekeeper's Fanfic Author. (A/N:That's me! Yay!) In this tornament, you'll be racing against other teams on speacily designed hover-boards called Air Boards." As GFA said that, on the screen next to him, a scematic of a devise that looked like a sooped-up snowboard appeared.
"Intriging," Edd said, looking closely at the skematic.
"You'll be racing these Air Boards on specially designed race-tracks located around the world," GFA told them. As he said that, the skematics on the screen next to him dissapeared, and multiple images of race-tracks set in different locations around the world began appearing. "I'll explain more about these corses, the Air Boards, and the contest in Boston."
"Boston?" The Eds asked, again confused.
"Yes," GFA said, again like he was right there with them. "Boston. Look inside the envelope you receaved."
Edd and Ed quickley open their envelopes. The 3 freinds reach inside their envelopes, and each one pulls out 2 slips of paper.
"One of the 2 slips of paper in your envelope is a plane ticket," GFA explained. "Take them to your local airport on the date of June 26th, and you'll be put on a plane to Boston. From Boston, go to the Tipton hotel (lol), where you, your freinds, and the other competetors will be staying during the tornament, and present the other slip of paper to the man at the front desk. He'll then show you to the lounge, where you and your team will meet the other competetors, and I'll explain more about the contest."
"Cool!" Ed exclaimed.
"Indeed," Edd added. "Shall we go, Eddy?"
"Eh...I don't know," Eddy said.
"Aw, come on Eddy!" Ed begged.
"And, Eddy," GFA continued. "If you, Eddward and Edwin are the lucky team that wins the tornament, you'll each recive $10,000 in cash as a prize."
As soon as GFA said that, Eddy pulled a suitcase out of nowhere.
"Pack your bags, boys," Eddy told his freinds. "We're headed to Boston!"
"Hooray!" Ed and Edd both declared happily. They then both left to get packed for Boston. They all knew that this racing thing was gonna be fun...
We see Ed, Edd, and Eddy walking through the streets of Boston, all carying suitcases. The date is June 26th, and the Eds had just goten off their plane, and were currently searching for the Tipton hotel. "Hey, what are we looking for again?" Eddy asked Edd.
"The Tipton hotel, Eddy," Edd told him. "The author just said that."
"Gravy!" Ed shouted.
Edd quickley scanned the area, searching for their hotel.
"Hey guys!" Edd said. "I found it!" He pointed in a general direction.
"What makes you so sure that that's the Tipton?" Eddy asked, looking to where Edd was pointing. They were looking at a huge building. A "T" in a circle was on the green awning above the front door, and next to the building was a huge sign that said "Tipton".
"I don't know," Edd said. "Lucky guess."
The 3 freinds ran down to the hotel and entered it. It looked like a plain old 5-star hotel inside. They quickley went up to the front desk. An african-american man in a grey suit who was pretty much bald (A/N:In my opinoin, he's bald) was at the desk looking at some sort of book or something. His name tag said "Mr. Mosbey. Maneger."
"Excuse me sir," Edd said to get the Mosbey's attention.
"Hmm?" Mosbey looked up from his book thing. The Eds showed him their cards they got in their letters last chapter.
"We're here for the World Air Board Racing Tornament," Eddy told him.
"Right this way," Said Mosbey, stepping out from behind the desk. He led the Eds down the left hallway until they got to an archway that was roped off by a velvet rope. A bald man in his late 50s stood in front of the rope, holding a clipboard. He was obvisouly a security guard. Beyond him, in the lounge, the lights were dim and a bunch of other people, presumably the other contestants, were dancing to loud music.
"Whoa!" Exclamined Eddy, looking beyond the gaurd at the party. "What's going on in there?"
"The Pre-Race Party," The gaurd told them. "It's just to give the contestants something to do while we wait for your host, Gravekeeper's Fanfic Author to arive. He'll be here in about 10 minutes. Names, please."
"Eddy McLarson, Eddward Tomson, and Edwin Farns," Eddy told the gaurd. "AKA The guys who are gonna win this thing and walk away with $30,000 bucks!"
"AKA cocky knuckleheads," The gaurd joked. He looked at his clipboard, then stepped aside from the velvet rope and held it open. "All right, go ahead in."
The Eds went into the party. Everyone was dancing or talking. On stage, there was a large screen TV, and behind it was a closed velvet curtain.
"What should we do now?" Edd asked.
"Well, that gaurd said the host wouldn't be here for 10 minutes," Eddy replied. "And this is a party. Which means there's only 1 thing to do!" He then pulled a pair of sunglasses out of his pocket and put them on. "Let's Mambo!" With that, Eddy jumped into the crowd.
"This is not my strong suit," Edd said, getting nervous. A goofy grin formed on Ed's face.
"I'm the ice-cream man!" Ed declared happily, jumping into the party.
Edd, however, decide to do the whole wallflower thing. He stood up against the wall, looking around at the other competetors. There sure were a lot. Looking out to the dance floor, Edd saw a yellow humanoid sponge in a suit and a bowl of water on his head, a bird, airplane, plant thing doing an odd dance while saying "Coco" repeatedly, a miniature pink elephant wearing a camping uniform, a mutant alligator girl in a camping uniform, but a different one from the elephant's, a blue thing that looked like a mutant koala, ect.
A few minutes, the music stopped and the lights came back on. A 13 year-old boy, with black hair that was a little long, wearing a black cloak over a white shirt and a pair of blue-jeans came out from behind the curtain.
"Welcome, my freinds," He spoke to the crowd in a loud voice. "I am Gravekeeper's Fanfic Author, the one who invited you all here for the first ever World Air Board Racing Tornament! Now, first, I'd like to explain a little bit more about the contest. In this room, we have a total of 16 different racing teams from all around the world. Some teams have only 3 members, while some teams have more then that. Now, when it comes your team's time to race, if your team has just 3 members, all 3 of you will be in the race. If your team has more than 3 members, you'll select 3 members of your team to be in the race. The contest will be held in tornament ladder style. That means that we'll first have 8 races, with 2 teams competing against each other in a race. The 8 winners of those matches will move on to the next round, we're they'll race against other winning teams, and so on until there's only one team left. That team will win the grand prize of $10,000 for each team member. Now, let's talk about what you'll be racing on."
As soon as GFA said that, a section of the stage next to him opened up. A table rose out of the opening. On the table was a high tech yellow-and-white board, with a little lever on the side, a blue pad near the front of the board, and a red bad near the back. GFA picked it up.
"This," He said. "Is what you'll be racing on. It's called an Air Board. A special hover board desinged and built by the top scincetists from around the world. Watch."
GFA set the board on the ground and stood on it. He kicked the lever on the side with his foot, and the bottom of the board started glowing blue! And then, the board rose up into the air, with GFA still on top! "Oohs" and "Aahs" were heard from the crowd.
"Oh, too cool!" Ed shouted.
"Nice board!" Someone else shouted.
GFA kicked the lever again, and the board went down to the ground with a thud. He got off the board.
"I'll be giving a demonstration on the Air Board at this practice track," GFA said. As he said that, on the TV behind him, an image of a racetrack appeared. The track was set in the middle of a field somewhere. By the track, there was a small building.
"And how are we gonna get to this track?" Somone in the crowd asked.
"That is where these come in," GFA said. The curtain behind him opened. Behind it were 12 translucent blue pods connected to a strange machine with a keyboard and a lever on it. "These are special teleportation pods that'll be used to get to the practice corse, and to the other corses around the world. Here, I'll demonstrate." GFA walked over to the machine, typed something into the keyboard, then pulled down the lever. A humming noise was heard. GFA quickley stepped inside one of the pods. There was then a blinding flash of blue light. When the flash subsided, GFA was gone!
"Whoa!" Some people in the crowd exclaimed. Everyone then turned their attention to the TV. On the TV, GFA stepped out of the building, completley fine!
"I told you," GFA said on screen. "All right John, start sending em' over!"
The security guard the Eds saw at the entrance, who's name was John, stepped on stage and walked over to the strange machine, his clipboard still in hand.
All right," John said. "When I call your team name, all members of that team will come up, step inside the pods, and will be teleported to the building on screen." John looked at the clipboard and cleared his throat. "Team Squarepants."
The sponge Edd saw earlier, a humanoid pink starfish wearing green shorts with purple flowers and a water bowl on his head, a humanoid blue-green squid wearing a brown shirt and a water bowl on his head, and a female humanoid squirrel wearing a cowboy hat, a yellow shirt, and a pair of blue-jeans, all steped on stage, each went inside a pod, and John pulled the lever on the machine. There was another flash of blue light. When the flash subsided, Team Squarepants was gone.
"Team Ed," John read.
"That's us!" Eddy shouted. He, Ed, and Edd all stepped on stage and went into the pods. John pulled the switch, and there was a blinding flash of blue light. When the flash subsided, the Eds were still in the pods, but no longer in the Tipton lounge. They were now in some kind of laboratory. To the left of them, a bunch of men in white coats were working on Air Boards. To the right of the Eds, there were a bunch of Air Boards laid neatly on the ground, and shelfs with helmets, elbow, and knee pads. In front of them, there was a large open space, with doors on the far end. Near the doors were Team Squarepants, and GFA, who was holding an Air Board.
"Ah, glad to see you made it!" GFA said to the Eds. "Here, step out of the pods and let the others come through."
The Eds stepped out of the pods and walked over to GFA. Soon, the other teams began arriaving. After a few minutes, everyone was in that small building.
"Okay, now," GFA said. "Everyone follow me."
GFA led the group outside to the racetrack. Along the sides of the track were a bunch of ambulances, just in case of an accident. A man holding a camera was standing near the side of the track. He was on an Air Board. GFA walked over to the track, set his Air Board down, and got on it.
"Now," GFA started. "To activate your Air Board, simply kick the lever on the side like this." He kicked the lever and his Air Board started up. The cameraman did the same. "Now, I'm gonna go once around this track, explaining more about the Air Board. The cameraman will follow me, and what he records will be shown on the screen behind you." Everyone turned and saw a large screen on the wall of the building, just above the doors. It was currently showing GFA on his Air Board. "Now, to make your Air Board go, simply press the blue pad on front with your foot, like this!" GFA on screen raised his foot, slammed it down on the blue pad, and he sped off down the track! The cameraman followed.
"Whoa!" People in the crowd gasped, amazed at how fast GFA was going on the Air Board.
"Now to keep going," GFA on screen continued, "Just keep your foot on the blue pad. If you take your foot off, you'll slow down and eventually stop. To accelerate, just keep tapping your foot on the pad like this!" GFA tapped his foot repeatadly on the blue pad, and he fent faster and faster. The cameraman still followed. "To stop, simply take your foot off the blue pad and press the red pad on the back of the board." GFA then motioned for the camera guy to turn and look ahead. He did, and a U-turn was shown on screen. The camera guy turned back to GFA. "Okay, we're coming to a turn. To turn, simply lean in the direction you're turning." As GFA approached the turn, he leaned left slightly. His board began to turn. He skillfully made it around the turn onto the second strech, after which he staigtened back up. The camera still followed GFA through this, showing the crowd everything.
Once again, GFA motioned for the camera to look ahead. It did so, and we see that there is a rail going across the track ahead. Beyond it are some steel boxes scattered around on the track. The camera turned back to GFA.
"When racing, you will come across obsticles," GFA told the crowd of competeors. "Some of them, like this rail, you can jump over!" As he said that, he came close to the rail. When he was close enough, he and the cameraman both jumped over the rail, Air Board and all, resulting in some cheers from the crowd.
"Some obsticles, however, you won't be able to jump," GFA said, reffering to the steel boxes, which he was approaching fast. "Simply avoid those obsticles, like this!" GFA then skillfully manuavered through the small group of crates, with the camera capturing every move. The crowd continued to cheer.
GFA made it through the second turn with no problem. He and the cameraman were now coming down the home stretch. GFA again motioned for the camera to look ahead. It did, and this time, there was a huge ramp ahead with blue arrows on it. The camera turned back to GFA.
"Okay, one last thing to talk about, and that's speed boosters," GFA told the crowd. "Those are blue arrows on the track. Sometimes they're on the ground, and sometime's they're on ramps. Now, I'm gonna go off this ramp, getting a huge boost. And for this, the camera will go off and the cameraman will stop. Just look down the track and you'll see me." With that, the screen blackened.
Everyone quickley looked down the track and saw the ramp. A half a second later, GFA hit the ramp and went soaring through the air. In the air he did a melon grab (A/N:That's a skateboard trick) with a 360 degree spin, landing back on the track with no problem. When GFA neared the crowd, he took his foot off the blue pad and pressed his other foot down on the red pad. He came to a stop right in front of the crowd. The crowd cheered and applauded at GFA's performence. GFA then kicked the lever on the side of his board, switching it off.
"Looks like fun, huh?" He said to the crowd. "If anyone wants to try, then go back inside, grab an Air Board, a helmet, some elbow and knee pads, and come back out. We'll allow 6 people to race at a time."
Everyone immeadiatly ran inside the small building and came out with Air Boards, helmets, knee pads, and elbow pads. The rest of the day was spent with everyone practicing racing on the Air Boards. There were no injuries, except for when a grey hamster wearing a camping uniform like the elephant from earlier colided with one of the steel crates. Ouch. At the end of the day, the teams were teleported one by one back to the Tipton, where they would stay during the contest. GFA told everyone to get a good nights rest, for tommorow, the first anual World Air Board Racing Tornament would begin!
The next morning, all the contestants had gathered in the Tipton lounge. Gravekeeper's Fanfic Author and John stood on the lounge stage. Behind them was the big screen TV and the teleportation pods from the day before. "Welcome, everyone, to the first day of the World Air Board Racing Tornament!" GFA said to the crowd. "First off, we'll see which 2 teams will race against each other in the first race of the day."
As he finished saying that, John turned on the TV. Team names began flashing across the top and bottom of the screen. After about 10 seconds, the flashing stopped. "Team Turner" was at the top of the screen and "Team Squarepants" was at the bottom of the screen.
"All right," Said GFA. "Looks like the first race will pit Team Turner against Team Squarepants! Now, to see where they'll be racing."
As he said that, images of different racetracks set in different locations began flahing across the TV. After 10 more seconds, the flashing stopped, and the TV showed an image of a racetrack in the middle of a desert.
"All right, Team Turner and Team Squarepants will be racing on the desert track!" GFA told the crowd. He walked over to the machine attatched to the pods and typed something into the keyboard. "All right, John. Start sending 'em."
"Right," Said John. "Team Squarepants and Team Turner, you guys come up first."
The humanoid sponge, squid, starfish and squirrel from before stepped onstage. 3 10-year old boys also stepped on stage. The first wore a pink shirt, blue pants, had HUGE buck teeth, and wore a pink hat. The second was african-american, was bald, wore a blue sweater vest with a white shirt underneath and kahki pants. The last had blond hair, braces, wore an olive green jacket over a black shirt with blue pants. All 7 stepped into the pods and GFA pulled the3 switch. There was a blinding flash of blue light. When the light subsided, Team Squarepants and Team Turner were gone.
"All right, let's start sending everyone else over," GFA said to John.
John nodded and looked at his clipboard. "Team Ed."
"Am I it?" Ed said from the crowd. He, Edd, and Eddy quickley climbed on stage and stepped into the pods. GFA threw the switch, and there was a flash of blue light. When the flash subsided, the Eds were still in the pods, only the pods were in a room exactly like the one they were teleported to yesterday. Team Turner and Team Squarepants stood by the doors. The Eds quickley stepped out of the pods to allow the other teams to come threw. Soon, all the other teams came threw the pods. Finnaly, GFA himself came threw.
"Okay, everyone who's racing, grab an Air Board, a set of elbow and knee pads, and a helmet," GFA said. Team Turner did that, as well as the sponge, star, and squirrel. Clearly, the squid wasn't racing. "Good. Now everyone follow me."
He led the crowd out the doors, and everyone was hit with a blast of heat. They were in the middle of a huge desert. In front of them was a racetrack and the starting line. Across the track was a huge screen. To the left and right of the building were some bleachers. On the track, there was a man holding a camera who was on an Air Board.
"Okay, all racers suit up and get on the track," GFA said to everyone. "Everyone else, take a seat on the bleachers."
Everyone did that.
As the sponge, starfish, and squirrel of Team Squarepants gots their helmets and pads on, the squid sat near them on the bleachers.
"I still can't belive you guys forced me to come to this stupid competition," The squid, who's name was Squidward, complained.
"Aw, quit yer belly achin', Squidward," The squirrel, who's name was Sandy said in her thick Texan accent. "Beside, I told ya me, Spongebob, and Patrick will do all the racin'."
"That prize money is as good as ours!" The sponge named Spongebob said.
"Money!" The starfish Patrick repeated.
Meanwhile, on the other side of the bleachers, the pink hatted kid, who's name was Timmy, sat on thge first row. He allready had a pink helmet, knee pads, and elbow pads on. His board was next to him. Suddenly, a pink soda can and a green hot dog in a green bun appeared out of nowhere next to Timmy. Both had faces on them. The pink one's name is Wanda, and the green one is Cosmo. They're Timmy's magical Fairy God Parents, and both are in disguise.
"Hey there, sport," Wanda greeted Timmy. "Good luck in the race. Are you sure you'll be okay?"
"Relax, Wanda," Said Cosmo. "He just racing on an Air Board 2 feet off the ground going 50 miles an hour around dangerous turns, loops, and obsticles."
"Cosmo's right," Timmy said. "This race is gonna be a snap."
We now see GFA sitting inside an anouncer's booth on the roof of the small building. He is in front of a small table with a microphone on it.
"Racers, to the starting line!" GFA said into the microphone. His voice was heard by everyone.
"Gotta go!" Timmy said as he ran onto the track with his board.
"Good luck, Timmy!" Cosmo and Wanda called. Then, Ed walked by them. He stopped when he noticed Cosmo.
"Ohh, a green hot dog with a face on it!" Ed said with a smile, picking up Cosmo. "That's the best kind of hot dog!" He then swallowed Cosmo in one gulp and sat down.
Timmy, his 2 freinds, named Chester (the blond one) and A.J. (the bald one), Spongebob, Sandy, and Patrick all lined up in front of the starting line. They all stood on their boards. Timmy's was pink, A.J.'s was silver, Chester's was brown, Patrick's was pink, Sandy's was blue, and Spongebob's was yellow. They all had on elbow and knee pads, along with helmets.
"The first race of today will pit Timmy Turner, A.J., and Chester McBadbat of Team Turner, against Spongebob Squarepants, Patrick Star, and Sandy Cheeks of Team Squarepants!" GFA said into the microphone. "The rules are simple. One lap around the track. The first one to cross the finish line will move onto the next round with their team. Also, if you bail, try not to get your blood everywhere. We just cleaned the track yesterday. Now, racers, start your Air Boards!"
Timmy, A.J., Chester, Spongebob, Sandy, and Patrick all started their Air Boards. The cameraman did as well and turned on his camera. The huge screen on the other side of the track showed the racers from the camerman's veiw.
"On your mark..." GFA said.
The racers balanced themselfes on their boards...
"Get set..."
The racers held their left feet above the blue pads on their boards...
"GO!"
The racers slammed their feet on the pads and sped off. The race is on.
<Ran Out of Money, Couldn't Afford More Parts>
