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"Yo," I said, entering the stage, wearing a black tuxedo as my green tail slugged along behind me, "I'm Yoshizilla, or more preferably, Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus. And I'm here today to tell you folks...how to write a racing fanfic."
"We already know, genius!" Ness shouted, being dragged off the stage by Toad and Kirby.
I sighed and cleared my throat. "Poor, ignorant boy. Now where was I?" I cleared my throat and pulled out a blank document, it being a simple, piece of paper. "First, you'd have to have played at LEAST one of the many awesome Mario Kart games, or DIddy Kong Racing on the N64 or DS to say the least, to be able to fully understand the lenghts of what Yoshi Kart may be going. Second..." I turned to the right side, sitting down on a chair with a small desk in front of me. "Yoshi, get out the chart!"
"Roger!" Yoshi shouted, as he and Pikachu walked onto the stage, holding a chart and placing it behind me. "All set down for ya, Yoshizilla!"
"Thanks, boys," I said smiling, as Yoshi and Pikachu walked off the stage, and I turned around to face the camera. "Right then, where was I?" I snapped my fingers. "Oh yes. CHaracters...first off, you have to have characters who the audience reading the fanfic will like. For example, having the Super SMash Brothers as major characters, or preferably the MAIN CHARACTERS, is a good idea, especially considering that Yoshi Kart is named after one of the original twelve Super Smash Brothers from the N64 game of the same name. Second..." I took out a blue pen. "If you are to add any other characters, give them potential and don't throw them aside, or you might as well just left them out from the beginning." I glanced angrily at the chart, pointing to barely used characters like the Yu-Gi-Oh crew, Eliwood/Lyn/Hector, the Simpsons, and plenty others. I turned around to face the camera agin. "Third, about the Sonic characters. I like them, but I have and always will prefer the Nintendo characters to them. That's why I rarely use them. Their biggest roles usually come from the effort that my buddy, Heartless Nobody, formerly known around here as Milleniumon the Sonamy Freak, puts into the fanfic, and I gotta say, he does a good job at giving them personality." I then chuckled. "Of course, if he could ACTUALLY LEARN HOW RACING WORKS, then I'll respect him even more."
"Really, though?" Bowser asked, stomping close to me. "You know just how nutty that guy can be..."
I sighed, shaking my head. "Yes, with his references and sick, twisted perverted mind...and of course, the curse words." I shrugged. "Hey, it's the reason why Yoshi Kart is spleficially rated Teen. That, and the fact that he tries to get the ladies' clothes off so-"
"TOO MUCH INFORMATION!!!" Bowser roared, running off the stage.
I sweatdropped. "Whoops...did I say too much?" I laughed and rubbed the back of my head. "I guess so. Anyway..." I cleared my throat again and turned to face the camera. "On the topic of how racing fanfics work, you have to know the racing standards in races. Especially considering that this is based off on mario Kart and, to a certain extent, Diddy Kong Racing. First and most importantly, you HAVE to let the reader feel as if they're actually in the action, racing alongside their favorite characters. Second, you must include zooming, revving, speed boosts, power slides, and minu-turbos. Second, having small bounces makes a good reference to the Mario Kart games, and just adds more detail to the rtace. Also describing the race course helps as well, as it lets you, the readers, know what the course will be like for the racers. Notice how that my latest race, the Turbo Traffic City race, is far more detailed and filled with lots more racing action than my very first race, the Sauropod Forest. I have also grown with the Yoshi Kart fanfic, and as you may have noticed, I've been constantly updating, adding, and even changing chapters. Heck, I'm planning on adding a chapter before the 2nd and 3rd chapters to explain on some of the racers who are here now, but weren't when the first race started (and that's primarily going to Bowser, Ganondorf, Mewtwo, Donkey Kong, and Wario). So-"
"Yoshizilla, your cup of coffee is here," Princess Zelda said, tapping me on the shoulder.
I sighed, putting my pen down and interrupting my writing. "Zelda, please, I'm in the middle of explaining Yoshi kart to the audience here."
Zelda blushed a bit, and she rubbed the back of her head nervously. "Oh. Sorry, Yoshizilla." She walked off the stage.
I only muttered as he held my pen and resumed writing on my piece of paper. "Anyway, where was I? Oh yes, of course." I looked at the camera again. "As I was saying before Princess Zelda interrupted me, I'm planning on adding a chapter before the 2nd and 3rd chapters to explain on some of the racers who are here now, but weren't when the first race started (and that's primarily going to Bowser, Ganondorf, Mewtwo, Donkey Kong, and Wario). So that you will all understand better, and the entire fic would be better understood and the main and major characters will have more detailed development. Note how all of them were almost exactly the same, but some had their quirks. Well, with Yoshi being the typical stereotype hero, I'm planning on making him act a bit like Spongebob, but also being learned to be a better driver by his best friend and mentor, Dr. Hoshi. Peppy will also be getting a character development, and as the stories go on, he will become a bit stupider and more funnier, but nontheless, he'll be as friendly as ever. And Birdo is certainly the cautious one who is also sweet and kind. And...am I going off topic here?" I look at my piece of paper. "Oh..." I shrugged. "Well, what I said pretty much sums up Yoshi Kart and its perks. As well as the chapter's main point - to tell you how to write PROPER racing fanfics." I then slapped my forehead. "D'oh...I should have added that to the title..."
"GET TO THE POINT!!!" Angrily shouted the cries of Ganondorf, Link, and Roy in unison, standing on the right side of the stage.
I sighed, and got up from my chair. "All right, then. I guess that means you have to continue reading Yoshi kart for more, folks." I grinned, showing off a shine in one of my teeth. I then bowed to the camera and walked off the stage, dragging behind me my big, gnreen, sluggy tail.
And the Moral of this Chapter: That's pretty much how Yoshizilla writes Yoshi Kart.
