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[edit] Episode 1

[edit] World 13: The Holy land of Noir

[edit] Let's Get ready for Letdown!

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: In a twist we probably didnt see coming, The Witches, The Puella, Nox Nyctores, Even Xehanort's Myriad Forms turn out to all be possessions of a single being known as...

(The Sluttiest Cosplayers we could find are lying on the ground as Climax Jump Sword Form plays in the Background. A literal body of Nickelodeon slime jumps up with impossible acrobatic skill and uncovers to reveal:)

SPACE GUY: Lets Prepare 4 Letdown!

(Enter Metataros)

EZ RIDER: Eeeyup! They tossed everything that mate Xehanort Unique and Turned him into, Get this, An Artificial Imagin Created by the Nostalgia Critic to erase all of existence from existence! God, I hate verbalizing that...

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: I already killed God in this Universe and yet It's Still Going!

RAGE RIDER: Maybe you shouldn't have said "Erase Existence from Existence"

[edit] Epilogue

[edit] True Love's Kiss?

[edit] Did you read it out loud?

Madoka: should you wish to erase the story of Fate, then through true love's kiss the spell shall break

NASH: Really, Moffat... Did you read that little tidbit... Out Loud, D-Did you read that new detail of the powers of the Embodiment of Hope out loud?

LINKARA: Oh, he read that fact out loud, see that face? that's a telltale sign of pain and misery...

SWEDE: According to my sources, It appears that Gen has read it aloud as well. But let's not fool ourselves, he's kinda like the Frank Miller of Japan.

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: That leaves the mastermind himself. It's clearly cannon, so he clearly couldn't have done it. He just went with the flow while Moffat opposed the plot point, And Gen must have been the guy who proposed the Idea to the executive morons Because the game has just stated that the source of all cybertronian life can grant a guy temporary godhood through true love's kiss!

[edit] How? True Love's Kiss!

NASH: How can he alter the age gaps of the various characters in the franchise, even going as far as recasting them outright?

Madoka: Through true love's kiss the spell shall break

LINKARA: How can he grant a select 100 lifeforms the memories that he has had over the course of his 1300 years of life from the good times to the 80s?

Madoka: Through true love's kiss the spell shall break.

JESUOTAKU: How will he purify his enemies?

Madoka: through true love's kiss the spell spell break.

EZ-RIDER: How will he save Adric?

Madoka: through true love's kiss the spell shall break.

SWEDE: He is at the point in his life where he brashly believes that he has the right.

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: He seems to have skimmed the part where his fourth incarnation stated that if he did what he was going to do... Then he'd be just like the ones that he was going to erase...

NASH: A single thought, and that's it. They are no more, Countless lives and countless civilizations will spared from death without even knowing the word "Dalek"

LINKARA: But Hooooooooow?

Madoka: through true love's kiss the spell shall break

[edit] Scrambled Outfits

(Linkara is Dressed up like 90s Kid. 90s Kid is Dressed up Like Boffo the Clown, Boffo the Clown is Dressed up like Dr. Linksano who is dressed as Harvey Finevoice and he's dressed in Linkara's familiar outfit)

LINKARA: You cant be this insane! You can't! You've just stated out loud why this McGuffin Wont Work! What are you, A Moron?

HARVEY FINEVOICE: A Yutz?

90s KID: AN ASSJACK!?

DR.LINKSANO: Any Magic that can be dissected and analyzed is worth calling a new form of science but...C'mon That Magic is Simply Too Outlandish to even exist, It makes no sense and simply states "It's Magic, I dont have to explain it, Duuuur."

[edit] Charlie Sheen...RIGHT ABOUT SOMETHING!?!

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: Look I hate to borrow stock footage from a subpar comedy, let alone redub it but...

NASH: Take it, Two and a Half Men!

NC!CHARLIE HARPER: Geez, the way to solve anything in a disney...well, ANYTHING seems to be getting to first base.

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: You see what you did there, Gen ___? You just made my protrayal of Charlie Sheen right about something! You did that, Gen-Baka! You Did it, That's how batshit crazy you've gotten! Now, I'm not one to reference such a shitty ass show that is filthy, racist and overall unfunny...

NASH: Not to mention the shocking lack of Dave Chapell

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: But it's truuue... the Doctor will be reduced to a kawaii four year old toddler after rearranging time and space by kissing a five year old girl he barely even knows at this point in his life, Automatically making them an Item... You know where this is going!

[edit] Next Stop: Cleared Game!

CINEMA SNOB: After some Zord Travel following...whatever the hell I just missed, The Brothers Kadoya land the Ultimazord in the Holy Land of Noire. Why does the Holy Land look like an entertainment center with the seven dragonballs on top of a flatscreen, because the story of this otherwise great game to play was written by Monkeys.

[edit] Still 42

Roxas!Tsukasa: It's A-A Fake?

BEN STEIN: Yes, but it's a good fake...

Ahiru: ...42 (Dissolves into paint)

YOGERT: I found it in a Cracker-Jack Box!

[edit] Scripts

NASH: So he beats up Saburo in Many Forms before reaching Fate and Relaunching the Whoniverse liberated from fate and becoming God.

EZ RIDER: and by God, I mean a Kid. And by Fate I mean the BBC. Yeah, Remember when they stopped at 4Kids to Moon them, When they stared at the stars and Andy said he'd wanna Touch one? Yeah, that was code for "If I show up here, the Whoniverse is Permanently Reset!" Y'know if you were to give better exposition, say "Hey, If fate is a place I go to then Toei has complete control over the Doctor Who Franchise" It has no fourth wall foundation but at least it'll alarm the audience as to what's going on with production!

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: Scripts, they're not just for Movies anymore!

[edit] The Wrap Party

SAGE: We even get a fancy new TARDIS Interior to house a Wrap Party of the Franchise while the old set is being dismantled in front of his very eyes, The party Includes the Meta Guy from before because why the F--- not!

Andy: Didn't know I touched this many hearts...

Wreck-It Ralph: I got the Word out.

LINKARA: After a little scene Mami, Her other and Mamiya. Andy meets the last three Incarnations of the times when he was not a witch.

Kyoko: By the way, you've got to try this (Hands Andy a Banana)

Velenex Fayed: It's called a Banana, Bananas are cool!

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: River, being a clone of the TARDIS, Will sadly not exist thanks to his undone adventures but she gives Fayed her Complete Diary for him to keep in the new universe. Sure, Why Not!

Atomisa: you've become the concept of free will itself, just as I became the hope of all life

SUEDE: Why is there A Goddess Madoka and a Human Madoka?

(Shots of the Reviewers looking dumbfounded)

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: Starscream Cookies!

(They all agree)

JO!SLIPSTREAM: Starscream Cookies are as good as any other answer!

NC!STARSCREAM: Hey, That my line!

JO!SLIPSTREAM: Says the guy who cloned himself as his own personal dream girl!

[edit] Orion

LINKARA: So the Doctor Punches the Cosmos to restor the Continuity and that's all there is now... there isnt any more... (Goes to the Orion System of Stars) I AM A MAN! (Punches the stars that forms the Orion Pictures Logo) While you are a failed movie company!

[edit] Gay Twincest

SUEDE: After a recap of the consequences of Andy's Godhood. Sure, Why not! We get a few complaints from Terra...

Terra: That's a ridiculous way to end a franchise!

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: No...(Insert Poster of Alien Ressurection) this is a ridiculous way to end a franchise!

Walt Disney: So, All this bruhaha is about this pickle being worse than death, eh?

LINKARA: Seeing as how our writers are tearing apart the whoniverse, then yes, yes it freaking is!

Walt Disney: I felt all the pain and suffering that they have endured...

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: (Mocking William Hartnell) especially their harsh treatment from that Margret Thatcher bitch and that Michael Grade moron...I'm Acting!

(Terra cries in the Doctor's Arms)

MARZGURL: Actually, I think that how the script reading for Birth by Sleep went when Jason Dohring got to Terranort.

CINEMA SNOB: As his final wish before his memories vanish from his neck and Noggin, He asks older brother Terra to take care of him.

Walt Disney: As you can see, it's probably too late for me

NOSTALGIA CHICK: Too late? I may see some middle age on your face, but it's not too late!

JESUOTAKU: Remember, he's growing younger...

NOSTALGIA CHICK: Which means that the Yaoi fest will get steamier as it rolls along?

JESUOTAKU: Sure, Why Not!

(Nostalgia Chick undresses as Walt Disney regresses to the svelte young Andy Davis, she is in nothing but her jeans and panies as she slowly undos her bra when...)

Andy: (Regresses to a young boy) I hope that one day we'll meet everyone again, And you have to dream about the neverending story...

(Nostalgia Chick looks at herself and at the male reviewers)

JESUOTAKU: Want another Sonic Says?

NOSTALGIA CHICK: (Covers her Chest with a blanket) God yes!

NC!SONIC: Hey, Kids! Japanese Animation seems to be daring than American Animation, ranging from Dyed Hair and Giant Jigglies to Yucky Yaoi and Skanky Yuri and lots of other horseshit. But, If you and your older or younger brother are caught within a spacegina without any clothes, that's just Tetsuya Nomura ignoring Gen's Actions that ultimately imply that you want to touch each other's bathing suit area! That's called Incest and that's no good! So if you find yourself in the sight of a stranger who want to at least have your brother touch your Chilli Dog and it the same guy who tortures his least favorite Puella Magi on a regular basis, Just get outta there!

[edit] Puppy Love!

NASH: And so, Air Kadoya Ends his role by kissing a Dalek and causing the omniverse to completely reboot! Yeah, that was the connection from earlier, Remember when Lady Atomisa said 'through true love's kiss the spell shall break' earlier? That seems to be code for 'kiss a Dalek and you undo the entire franchise altogether!' and It would have been a better resolution if she said 'Dude, If the Doctor kisses a Dalek, The BBC looses Doctor Who to the Sequel Monster!'

EZ RIDER: It wouldn't make sense, but at least it would have warned us about the Deal that brought this game into existence in the first place.

LINKARA: Scripts, They're not just for movies anymore!

[edit] BBC

NASH: Back in reality, Moffat is showing his Employers the game, before he assures that the Doctor will come back, a certain someone decides that this is an event flag for cleaning the slate for a new, Toyetic take on the Doctor, complete with a cosmic reboot of continuity with no returning monsters whatsoever!

JESUOTAKU: He even brings in that CGI Spider from Lost in Space to stare down his actor Gary "I fired my Agent" Oldman.

Todd: I'm sorry, Moffat. - I Quit!

LINKARA: Rumple is delighted by this new direction for the franchise, and scraps everything Doctor Who related for the new swag he'll be collecting... but then he realises what we figured out about the relaunch the second we learned that there ever was a relaunch

Rumplestiltskin: I might end up missing this whoniverse.

LINKARA: (in a Seventh Doctor outfit) Join the Club.

JESUOTAKU: After a sneak peak at the sellout Anime that Toei will be using to fill the Old show's tennis shoes as well as One of the six pairs of Tennis shoes Toonami's got, Ralph appears one last time to re-assure us that this is final end to our greatest sci-fi light of our time

Wreck-it Ralph: there's barely any room for Nicktoons or Transformers in a shonen show like this - Adios, Partner (poof!)

Rumplestiltskin: That's all, F--ks! (Poof, Again!)

[edit] "He's Dead, Too..."

EZ RIDER: He's Dead, Too? He's Dead, Too? (Repeats and goes faster and Faster) Yes, Aqua... Yes, he is. After more than 50 years, this is his life's final broadcast. He has passed on. The Doctor's memories of being, you know, the Doctor, is no more. They have ceased to be existant! The Time Lord's Future has expired and gone to meet his maker. he's a twerp. An Empty Shell. If he hadn't jumped into the All-Spark His Timeline would be pushing up daisies. He's OFF THE TWIG! HE'S KICKED THE BUCKET! HIS EXISTANCE AS THE DOCTOR IS NOW HISTORY! HIS MANY ADVENTURES ARE MERELY A FAIRY TALE NOW AND FOREVER! THIS...IS AN EX-GROWNUP!

HARVEY FINEVOICE: And your plans for dealing with this loss, Is one of the most insanely Idiotic plans I have ever witnessed, At no point in either Davies' Rambling Incoherent Run, or Moffat's Omnisidal Toast Story were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought...We would rather watch the paint dry on the cels of the Digimon 02 epilogue than sit through this edreich Abomination. Everyone who has ever seen Doctor Who at least once in it's 50 years of continuity is now dumber for having this game up to final boss and paying money for the very moment where Madoka grants the Doctor temporary godhood through kissing a little girl who fell in love with him. I repeat, the Doctor can channel a goddess through true love's...KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSS (Gasps) KIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-(Gasps)-IIIISSSSSSS (Faints.)

LINKARA: You Okay...

HARVEY FINEVOICE: (in a hourse voice) just peachy, kid...Just have to cancel a show or two, or five...

LINKARA: So, yeah...I award you negative five points, and may god have mercy on your soul.

Billy Madison: Okay, a simple wrong would've done just fine...

[edit] Speed it along

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: We have wonderful news, We've transitioned through Namine's Improving artwork and Talents into present day and that ultimately means the game's almost over.

CR: The Nostalgia Critic wakes up to hear about a Poker Game, The Critic ponders this, Moffat talks some more and Xehanort decides to Toss one, two and three of the Alice Games into the realm of Darkness and apparently burns the Original Book before it bites any more smucks in the black ass! I mean Jesus, it wiped out all existence a hundred and nine times in this one!

(Insert SPD Endings Parody)

TITANIC MOUSE: Wait a minute! Wait a minute! Where are you going! The game's not over yet!

ALL REVIEWERS: (Complaining)

[edit] A New Adventure

[edit] You paid Money for this!

-

CR!GEORGE LUCAS: See what I mean? And for our secret ending, we've got a sneak peak of our Bleach Replaceme-I mean Hottest New Anime on the Block: Fullmetal Alchemist: You are (not) alone Thanks Again for Playing and remember: You Paid Money for this!

[edit] Outro

Kingdom Hearts: Dream Drop Distance/Review <- ??? -> XXX

Kingdom Hearts III/The Review