Act 17: Subspace Shutdown
From Accct Wiki
“Time for Teletubbies! Time of Teletubbies!’ declared a speaker as it rose out of the ground.
The Teletubbies jumped out of their hillhouse, which is a rip-off of a hobbit hole and began dancing around to their dorky theme song.
“Teletubbies! Teletubbies! Say hello!” said the guy who was singing. “Eh oh!” said the four pests. They then wandered off to do something stupid like usual.
"One Day, Something Appeared from far away" Suddenly, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles appeared in a valley somewhere in Tubby Land. “Whoa, what the shell happened to us?” said Michelangelo as he looked around in confusion. “Apparently, it seems to me that there was a flux in the time-space continuum which launched us into this children’s television show,” Donatello replied.
“Uh in English, Donnie?” asked Leonardo. “We got sucked into an episode of Teletubbies,” said Don. “Of all the lousy junk on TV, we had to end up in this piece of crap?” demanded Raphael as he twirled his sais in agitation. “Raph, I don’t think it makes any difference,” said Leo. “The Will of the Writers on this Show can’t be determined. It’s harder than trying to figure out if the Olympics are rigged.”
“Well just being trapped here makes me want to kill something!” growled Raph. “Raph’s got a point,” said Mikey. “I totally hate those stupid Teletubbies, they’re so gay! Let’s kill ‘em!” “Sure!” agreed Donatello. “What are we waiting for?” asked Raph. The three looked at their brother, waiting to hear his reservations about killing characters from a kid’s show. “Alright guys, let’s go!” said Leo.
“COWABUNGA!” all four shouted as they ran off to kill the fat dorks.
Tinky-Winky was bouncing around while swinging his handbag in the air, proclaiming that he was a homosexual, when Leonardo popped up.
“Eh oh ninja turtle!” said Tinky-Winky to the turtle. “Your days won’t be so gay anymore, Teletubbie!” proclaimed Leonardo as he cut off the purple blob’s antenna. He then stabbed Tinky-Winky in the head and drew an L in the Teletubbies’ fat gut.
Tinky-Winky fell over and Leonardo bowed.
Dipsy was wearing his zebra-skin hat and was doing a karaoke of the Teletubbie theme song when a bo staff smashed his karaoke set.
Dipsy gasped as Donatello approached him. “Sorry weirdo,” said Donatello. “You won’t be the next American Idol!” Dipsy was knocked unconscious and the turtle beat the living shell out of him.
Po was riding her scooter through the countryside when she suddenly ran over a pizza box in the middle of the road.
The little Teletubbie flew into a windmill, only to be impaled in a wonderful way. “Die Teletubbie!” shouted Michelangelo as he whacked Po with his nunchucks.
After Po was finished getting beat up, the windmill began spinning and tore her into pieces.
Laa-Laa was doing aerobics on her bouncy ball, when a sai went through her head. Raphael stepped forward and repeatedly stabbed Laa-Laa.
“Well, we killed those freaks,” said Raph. “What do we do now?”
“It’s easy,” said Don. “After I killed Dipsy, I raided the Teletubbies’ house and swiped this ugly vacuum-thing.” He held up the Noo-Noo. “I think that if we shoot it at that weird sun we should go back to our world.” “Let’s hope so,” said Mikey. “I need pizza!”
Donatello fired the Noo-Noo at the sun, the baby let out an amused giggle as it made impact. The sun went nova and the turtles suddenly teleported back to Earth.
Tubby Land was covered in flames while the rabbits ran ablaze, the windmills burned into dust and a speaker was covered in flames.
“Time for Tubby Die Die!” it shouted before it was completely destroyed.
