From Accct Wiki

Revision as of 18:20, 11 August 2012

Part 1: It begins

Introduction

WTF

Steven Moffat

EZ-RIDER: (picks up the phone) what is it, Philip? He's gonna be voiced by whaaaaaaa

<BAKA>

EZ-RIDER: Holy stargina slag! Why would he-(Enter Moffat)Oh, there our hat is at! Steven Moffat, played by Yuuichi Nakamura in the land of the rising sun and played by himself in the rest of the universe! Give him a round of applause, he's gonna give us such joy in these hundred hours.

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: Wait, We're gonna be stuck here for 100 hours?

EZ RIDER: Yep!

(The Critic tries to dig his way out with a Spoon)

Plot No.1

EZ RIDER: Yep, that opening sequence was a video game pitched to Series Creator Tetsuya Nomura. But Unfortunately, the Rest of the Game isnt.

LINKARA: And these Doushebags, I am sad to say, are our first group of protagonists: The Creators of South Park, The Current Showrunner of Doctor Who at the Time and the High School Graduate from Toy Story 3. Moffat's Upset because while they wisely spent their money on an RPG Maker...Cool. While the South Park Guys blew their money on Batman and Makeovers.

Trey: These guys get tossed out of Premiere Parties. These guys get tossed into premiere parties.

World 13: The Holy land of Noir

Let's Get ready for Letdown!

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: In a twist we probably didnt see coming, The Witches, The Puella, Nox Nyctores, Even Xehanort's Myriad Forms turn out to all be possessions of a single being known as...

(The Sluttiest Cosplayers we could find are lying on the ground as Climax Jump Sword Form plays in the Background. A literal body of Nickelodeon slime jumps up with impossible acrobatic skill and uncovers to reveal:)

SPACE GUY: Lets Prepare 4 Letdown!

(Enter Metataros)

EZ RIDER: Eeeyup! They tossed everything that mate Xehanort Unique and Turned him into, Get this, An Artificial Imagin Created by the Nostalgia Critic to erase all of existence from existence! God, I hate verbalizing that...

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: I already killed God in this Universe and yet It's Still Going!

RAGE RIDER: Maybe you shouldn't have said "Erase Existence from Existence"

Epilogue

True Love's Kiss?

Did you read it out loud?

Madoka: should you wish to erase the story of Fate, then through true love's kiss the spell shall break

NASH: Really, Moffat... Did you read that little tidbit... Out Loud, D-Did you read that new detail of the powers of the Embodiment of Hope out loud?

LINKARA: Oh, he read that fact out loud, see that face? that's a telltale sign of pain and misery...

SWEDE: According to my sources, It appears that Gen has read it aloud as well. But let's not fool ourselves, he's kinda like the Frank Miller of Japan.

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: That leaves the mastermind himself. It's clearly cannon, so he clearly couldn't have done it. He just went with the flow while Moffat opposed the plot point, And Gen must have been the guy who proposed the Idea to the executive morons Because the game has just stated that the source of all cybertronian life can grant a guy temporary godhood through true love's kiss!

How? True Love's Kiss!

NASH: How can he alter the age gaps of the various characters in the franchise, even going as far as recasting them outright?

Madoka: Through true love's kiss the spell shall break

LINKARA: How can he grant a select 100 lifeforms the memories that he has had over the course of his 1300 years of life from the good times to the 80s?

Madoka: Through true love's kiss the spell shall break.

JESUOTAKU: How will he purify his enemies?

Madoka: through true love's kiss the spell spell break.

EZ-RIDER: How will he save Adric?

Madoka: through true love's kiss the spell shall break.

SWEDE: He is at the point in his life where he brashly believes that he has the right.

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: He seems to have skimmed the part where his fourth incarnation stated that if he did what he was going to do... Then he'd be just like the ones that he was going to erase...

NASH: A single thought, and that's it. They are no more, Countless lives and countless civilizations will spared from death without even knowing the word "Dalek"

LINKARA: But Hooooooooow?

Madoka: through true love's kiss the spell shall break

Scrambled Outfits

(Linkara is Dressed up like 90s Kid. 90s Kid is Dressed up Like Boffo the Clown, Boffo the Clown is Dressed up like Dr. Linksano who is dressed as Harvey Finevoice and he's dressed in Linkara's familiar outfit)

LINKARA: You cant be this insane! You can't! You've just stated out loud why this McGuffin Wont Work! What are you, A Moron?

HARVEY FINEVOICE: A Yutz?

90s KID: AN ASSJACK!?

DR.LINKSANO: Any Magic that can be dissected and analyzed is worth calling a new form of science but...C'mon That Magic is Simply Too Outlandish to even exist, It makes no sense and simply states "It's Magic, I dont have to explain it, Duuuur."

Charlie Sheen...RIGHT ABOUT SOMETHING!?!

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: Look I hate to borrow stock footage from a subpar comedy, let alone redub it but...

NASH: Take it, Two and a Half Men!

NC!CHARLIE HARPER: Geez, the way to solve anything in a disney...well, ANYTHING seems to be getting to first base.

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: You see what you did there, Gen ___? You just made my protrayal of Charlie Sheen right about something! You did that, Gen-Baka! You Did it, That's how batshit crazy you've gotten! Now, I'm not one to reference such a shitty ass show that is filthy, racist and overall unfunny...

NASH: Not to mention the shocking lack of Dave Chapell

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: But it's truuue... the Doctor will be reduced to a kawaii four year old toddler after rearranging time and space by kissing a five year old girl he barely even knows at this point in his life, Automatically making them an Item... You know where this is going!

<Drawn Together Babies>

Next Stop: Cleared Game!

CINEMA SNOB: After some Zord Travel following...whatever the hell I just missed, The Brothers Kadoya land the Ultimazord in the Holy Land of Noire. Why does the Holy Land look like an entertainment center with the seven dragonballs on top of a flatscreen, because the story of this otherwise great game to play was written by Monkeys.

Still 42

Roxas!Tsukasa: It's A-A Fake?

BEN STEIN: Yes, but it's a good fake...

Ahiru: ...42 (Dissolves into paint)

YOGERT: I found it in a Cracker-Jack Box!

Scripts

The Wrap Party

SAGE: We even get a fancy new TARDIS Interior to house a Wrap Party of the Franchise while the old set is being dismantled in front of his very eyes, The party Includes the Meta Guy from before because why the F--- not!

Andy: Didn't know I touched this many hearts...

Wreck-It Ralph: I got the Word out.

LINKARA: After a little scene Mami, Her other and Mamiya. Andy meets the last three Incarnations of the times when he was not a witch.

Kyoko: By the way, you've got to try this (Hands Andy a Banana)

Velenex Fayed: It's called a Banana, Bananas are cool!

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: River, being a clone of the TARDIS, Will sadly not exist thanks to his undone adventures but she gives Fayed her Complete Diary for him to keep in the new universe. Sure, Why Not!

Atomisa: you've become the concept of free will itself, just as I became the hope of all life

SUEDE: Why is there A Goddess Madoka and a Human Madoka?

(Shots of the Reviewers looking dumbfounded)

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: Starscream Cookies!

(They all agree)

JO!SLIPSTREAM: Starscream Cookies are as good as any other answer!

NC!STARSCREAM: Hey, That my line!

JO!SLIPSTREAM: Says the guy who cloned himself as his own personal dream girl!

Orion

LINKARA: So the Doctor Punches the Cosmos to restor the Continuity and that's all there is now... there isnt any more... (Goes to the Orion System of Stars) I AM A MAN! (Punches the stars that forms the Orion Pictures Logo) While you are a failed movie company!

Gay Twincest

SUEDE: After a recap of the consequences of Andy's Godhood. Sure, Why not! We get a few complaints from Terra...

Terra: That's a ridiculous way to end a franchise!

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: No...(Insert Poster of Alien Ressurection) this is a ridiculous way to end a franchise!

Walt Disney: So, All this bruhaha is about this pickle being worse than death, eh?

LINKARA: Seeing as how our writers are tearing apart the whoniverse, then yes, yes it freaking is!

Walt Disney: I felt all the pain and suffering that they have endured...

NOSTALGIA CRITIC: (Mocking William Hartnell) especially their harsh treatment from that Margret Thatcher bitch and that Michael Grade moron...I'm Acting!

(Terra cries in the Doctor's Arms)

MARZGURL: Actually, I think that how the script reading for Birth by Sleep went when Jason Dohring got to Terranort.

CINEMA SNOB: As his final wish before his memories vanish from his neck and Noggin, He asks older brother Terra to take care of him.

Walt Disney: As you can see, it's probably too late for me

NOSTALGIA CHICK: Too late? I may see some middle age on your face, but it's not too late!

JESUOTAKU: Remember, he's growing younger...

NOSTALGIA CHICK: Which means that the Yaoi fest will get steamier as it rolls along?

JESUOTAKU: Sure, Why Not!

(Nostalgia Chick undresses as Walt Disney regresses to the svelte young Andy Davis, she is in nothing but her jeans and panies as she slowly undos her bra when...)

Andy: (Regresses to a young boy) I hope that one day we'll meet everyone again, And you have to dream about the neverending story...

(Nostalgia Chick looks at herself and at the male reviewers)

JESUOTAKU: Want another Sonic Says?

NOSTALGIA CHICK: (Covers her Chest with a blanket) God yes!

NC!SONIC: Hey, Kids! Japanese Animation seems to be daring than American Animation, ranging from Dyed Hair and Giant Jigglies to Yucky Yaoi and Skanky Yuri and lots of other horseshit. But, If you and your older or younger brother are caught within a spacegina without any clothes, that's just Tetsuya Nomura ignoring Gen's Actions that ultimately imply that you want to touch each other's bathing suit area! That's called Incest and that's no good! So if you find yourself in the sight of a stranger who want to at least have your brother touch your Chilli Dog and it the same guy who tortures his least favorite Puella Magi on a regular basis, Just get outta there!

Puppy Love!

BBC

NASH: Back in reality, Moffat is showing his Employers the game, before he assures that the Doctor will come back, a certain someone decides that this is an event flag for cleaning the slate for a new, Toyetic take on the Doctor, complete with a cosmic reboot of continuity with no returning monsters whatsoever!

<cause toy sales will go through the ROOF!>

JESUOTAKU: He even brings in that CGI Spider from Lost in Space to stare down his actor Gary "I fired my Agent" Oldman.

Todd: I'm sorry, Moffat. - I Quit!

LINKARA: Rumple is delighted by this new direction for the franchise, and scraps everything Doctor Who related for the new swag he'll be collecting... but then he realises what we figured out about the relaunch the second we learned that there ever was a relaunch

Rumplestiltskin: I might end up missing this whoniverse.

LINKARA: (in a Seventh Doctor outfit) Join the Club.

JESUOTAKU: After a sneak peak at the sellout Anime that Toei will be using to fill the Old show's tennis shoes as well as One of the six pairs of Tennis shoes Toonami's got, Ralph appears one last time to re-assure us that this is final end to our greatest sci-fi light of our time

Wreck-it Ralph: there's barely any room for Nicktoons or Transformers in a shonen show like this - Adios, Partner (poof!)

Rumplestiltskin: That's all, F--ks! (Poof, Again!)

"He's Dead, Too..."

EZ RIDER: He's Dead, Too? He's Dead, Too? (Repeats and goes faster and Faster) Yes, Aqua... Yes, he is. After more than 50 years, this is his life's final broadcast. He has passed on. The Doctor's memories of being, you know, the Doctor, is no more. They have ceased to be existant! The Time Lord's Future has expired and gone to meet his maker. he's a twerp. An Empty Shell. If he hadn't jumped into the All-Spark His Timeline would be pushing up daisies. He's OFF THE TWIG! HE'S KICKED THE BUCKET! HIS EXISTANCE AS THE DOCTOR IS NOW HISTORY! HIS MANY ADVENTURES ARE MERELY A FAIRY TALE NOW AND FOREVER! THIS...IS AN EX-GROWNUP!

HARVEY FINEVOICE: And your plans for dealing with this loss, Is one of the most insanely Idiotic plans I have ever witnessed, At no point in either Davies' Rambling Incoherent Run, or Moffat's Omnisidal Toast Story were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought...We would rather watch the paint dry on the cels of the Digimon 02 epilogue than sit through this edreich Abomination. Everyone who has ever seen Doctor Who at least once in it's 50 years of continuity is now dumber for having this game up to final boss and paying money for the very moment where Madoka grants the Doctor temporary godhood through kissing a little girl who fell in love with him. I repeat, the Doctor can channel a goddess through true love's...KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSS (Gasps) KIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-(Gasps)-IIIISSSSSSS (Faints.)

LINKARA: You Okay...

HARVEY FINEVOICE: (in a hourse voice) just peachy, kid...Just have to cancel a show or two, or five...

LINKARA: So, yeah...I award you negative five points, and may god have mercy on your soul.

Billy Madison: Okay, a simple wrong would've done just fine...

All just filler

JO!UZURA: Wow, I'm so high up-zura!

CR!GEORGE LUCAS: Yes. Yes, you are. Sorry bout the puppet, folks. I figured that I'd give her a tour of the workplace when I'm not on screen. After all, Studio Bones was very specific on a 42-minute OVA. You basically beat the game, this entire ending is just filler, you can leave now if you like.

CR!GEORGE LUCAS: Really, Every character will live, they're in the manga that'll be adapted into an Anime Seven Weeks after the Game's Release...We're not building up to anything.

(shot of young Fakir)

CR!GEORGE LUCAS: See, Told ya! Shell, we even tossed our old memorable opening score with the english pop song theme from the Japanese Animated Series Wolf's Rain! Thanks for playing Kingdom Hearts III! Stick Around for the Post-Credits scene he are required to have by law and dont forget to watch the new kickass anime adaptation of our popular Weekly Shonen Jump Manga series that faithfully tells the tale of the new Whoniverse: Fullmetal Alchemist: You are (not) alone

A New Adventure

You paid Money for this!

-

CR!GEORGE LUCAS: See what I mean? And for our secret ending, we've got a sneak peak of our Bleach Replaceme-I mean Hottest New Anime on the Block: Fullmetal Alchemist: You are (not) alone Thanks Again for Playing and remember: You Paid Money for this!

Outro