Nathan and the Wall Incident
From Pirate Bitch
This incident involved Nathan Page, also known as Pervy Page for good reason, rubbing his lower regions against a wall opposite a chip shop, which was closed down several minutes later in shame. The rubbing ended when he exploded. When reminded of this, he gets cross, stays silent, and either stops moving or walks really treally fast. But then he finds a wrought iron fence to relieve his anger.
Contents |
Allegations
Nathan attempted to say that this kaboomin' was due to Roof Warner being there too, but this was scroned by experts. "He did it with the wall for godsake!" cried disgusted Professor Jamie Tuffield.
Aftermath
Nathan toddled back to Chatham Grammar School for Gays, Lesbians, Bisexuals and Transgenders, legs tight together. "Just gotta use the toilet sir!" he informed the teacher.
"He asked me for a tissue!" confessed Leonardo Mace tearfully. Rob Paterson added "I heard him say, 'Ooh gawd it's down me leg... oh no, nooo, it's in me feckin' shoe!"
Chloétta Fourtrees said "He leered to me, 'I sat next to you in maths and I was moist!'" before becoming inconsolable. Victoria Streets, to Nathan's pleading cries of "I well love you Vikki!" said "What absolute filth he is."
David Latto added "Nathan asked me the very next day if I fancied a wall nearby. It had only been built two years ago, the child molester!"
Preferences
Nathan enjoyed a fetching terracotta front, but once mentioned a bit of breeze block never goes amiss. "I prefer painted walls," he added, "They are smoother to the touch." "He paints them himself!" giggled Garald S Kirk, commentator on perverted doings.
Historical Impact
- The Wall Street Crash was actually based on the Wall Street Splash, an event Nathan achieved single handedly.
- It is said Pink Floyd named their album The Wall after this incident.
