Piggy's Day/An Asag

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< Piggy's Day
Revision as of 18:03, 28 March 2016 by Hodari (Talk | contribs)

Gyorge: "An Asag! How intriguing, a very large and dangerous hellish beast, size of a small hill, and tough as nails, for sure."

Indiana: "Very well."

Indiana presses a button on a control panel that contains the names of all animals planted on Pluto. An asag appears on the battling field.

Indiana: "Now, this is an asag that I raised from a baby, so it isn't hostile to people unless provoked.

You look on from the comfort of the living room of the apartment.

Piggy: "No way in hell is John going to do damage to an asag!"

Fan: "Bah, John trains by punching through brick walls! That asag won't survive to the second round."

The asag eyes up John, who is preparing to strike at any moment. Fast as a lightning, John jumps up to the asag and strikes it straight on its leg with all his might.

John: "OW! Ow, ow ow ow!"

John hurts his hand, and has to retreat to gather his strength for a moment. The asag doesn't even seem to have noticed.

Fan: "WHAT!?"

Stakesholder: "Oh, that's gotta hurt."

Piggy: "Told you."

The other contestants look on in disbelief. John Timberman hurt his arm while punching this being! John looks over his shoulder at his rovals peering at him, and decides to give it another go. This time he climbs the torso of the asag, all the way to the top of its head. Then, he starts performing karate kicks against the asag's horn. The horn shakes for a very tiny bit, but doesn't seem to interest its owner even the slightest.

John: "Goddammit, what is this thing!?"

For one final attempt at gaining the attention of the asag, John climbs down on its face, and punches it in the eye. As John is about to throw the punch, the Asag focuses its five eyes onto John, and tenses up.

Asag: "EXCUSE ME, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

John: "Trying to start a fight."

Asag: "WELL CUT IT OUT. I'M TRYING TO HAVE A NAP."

The asag closes its eyelids. John tries to punch them, but they only give in slightly. He no longer gets any reaction out of the asag.

Ökerhj: "I think we've seen enough, John. Get down from that asag, you're not gonna get it awake."

A few of the contestants burst out laughing. John returns to the line, defeated.

Juflop: "Now, as you were unable to beat the asag, other contestants don't need to defeat it. Also, you can't challenge any more creatures until some other contestant has done so."

Piggy: "Ah, the ball is no longer in his corner! How about that."

Fan: "Hmpf."

A few rounds go by without either of them taking action. The rules state that if a stick-man defeats the creature of their choise, every other contestant must also do so. Two finalists are eliminated for losing to a svalbardian giant troll, and one voluntarily forfeits the competition after almost dying in a fight against a brain cloud. John and #10 defeat all of these creatures. Another contestant steps up. It's finalist #3, Ef Yorkesl, a new face on the comptetition who made it through the survival round by taming a permafrost worm and riding it for most of the round.

(Not done writing yet)

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