Alex and Kati's Bet
From Rom Com
LOCATION: Cemetery
CHARACTERS: Alex, Kati
During this scene, Alex and Kati come up with a bet to see which one of them can seduce the most people. In this scene, Alex and Kati make the bet that will drive the majority of the film. We must really believe that they are rivals and will do anything to show each other up. Probably there should have been some of that in the previous scene.
Everyone will have left. They are still in the cemetery. (I think they should reference a lot of past competitions and ridiculous exploits during the course of this conversation.) I think they should also make it obvious that they've noticed Hallie's attraction to Nick (something like "but she won't cheat on him ["him", being Dylan.]." "She'd cheat on him with me." "She'd cheat on him with me." "Want to bet?")
So what's your assessment?
There's a reason I win every time.
We tied.
Tie counts as winning.
And three weeks ago Carmen won, and before that I had won twice in a row.
Okay. My point. Carmen: still crazy. Toby: still boring. Olivia: still nice.
What did you think of Will?
The new guy? Gullible.
Yeah. I can't believe he fell for your fake crying bit.
I thought it was convincing.
For anyone who doesn't know you.
Anyway, my point is that essentially nothing's changed with us. (She ticks them off on her fingers. This is not in "list" form; after the first two she says them as if they were separate statements.) We've gotten--hm--a little older, a little taller, we're going to college, Olivia and Toby went out--
Remember Brian?
Brian who?
Olivia's ex. Before Toby.
Ew. How could I forget. (Long pause.) Toby is Mark Wahlberg in comparison. (She thinks about it.) Okay, more like Nicholas Cage. With the, y'know (she makes a gesture towards her head as if to indicate that Nicholas Cage is balding. Pause) Poor Brian.
Poor me, you mean. He just had to be him. I had to talk to him.
How did she start with Toby?
You know, I don't remember.
Because, Olivia's not bold enough to break up with anybody.
Oh, I don't know. If the right person came along.
Speaking of which...
(Excitedly.) The new guy?
(almost at the exact same time) I know.
But she won't make a move.
Yes?
No, she won't.
Want to bet?
Always.
How much?
Fifty dollars--
You're on.
I'm not done yet. Fifty dollars, and the winner gets to write a personal ad for the loser
Oh god, not again. Are you not tired of that yet?
Studly 18 year old white male seeks hot tongue lashing from anybody willing to give it a try
Ugh...You know, I didn't even think that was funny.
Hairy a plus. Call Greg.
No personal ads.
And you have to respond to every call.
Then no bet.
You're just scared.
The odds aren't good enough. Now, if William were more attractive...I mean, if William were more like yours truly...
She wouldn't cheat with you. Why would she want to be with you? (Long pause.) But I bet I could get her to cheat.
Yeah?
Yeah.
I'm pretty sure she's heterosexual.
That's not even the point. I have a superior technique.
Like hell you do. (Pause.) Look, I know, let's go to a club and see who can get more numbers.
Would you pick the club?
I'm not letting you pick the club.
Then no deal. I'm not going to trust you--
Oh please, the poker thing was a long time ago
Those scars are permanent.
Just a couple of minor scratches, and you won't trust me to pick the club.
(Over the last part of his statement) Neither of us trusts each other.
How about we go to two clubs; one of mine and one of yours.
Maybe. But it's got to be more personal than phone numbers. You can get a number from anywhere.
Yeah?
I want documented evidence. I want pictures.
How the fuck am I going to take a picture of...?
Cell phone camera.
All right. We take pictures of our...our what, our seducees?
I'd call them victims.
In compromising positions.
Yeah. And anywhere, not in a club.
Adds an element of chance.
And we get access to each others' pictures.
Should we say the first one to take fifty photos wins?
Why not a hundred? Or two hundred? Why do we need to stop?
Slightly disorienting close shot of Kati. Her head is in much more of the left side of the frame, but she is looking almost directly face-on at the camera. She is quite grave.
This type of game doesn't end with a number. I wouldn't be satisfied.
All right. First one to break?
They shake hands.
First one to break.
Previously: Opening Next: Alex/Hallie Seduction
