BWBooks: Shin Chan's Book of Apologies/Apology Chapter 12

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Dear Mrs. Sakurada:

First of all let me say that I am really sorry you got angry. In fact I feel guilty about myself. I should have done nothing. No. Wait. That's actually right. Not only "I should have done more" but I should have done a while back. I've always been a bit of a brat - to concerned about what other people might think of me rather than doing what I knew should be done.

Let me tell you a little bit of information about what I have done and more instructions on what you need to do. Weren't those songs that someone else sang when we all make mistakes? We definitely heard the song, the voice of Forgiveness and the apology of a guilty brat. I'm not sure if you heard it or not; you may have mistook me for thunder, but I heard you and now I'm gone. It made sense. I saw my mother who had passed on and my father who had got home from work when she was fixing dinner. Some of my actions were bad; some were rotten. What is really sad is that the same goes for my mom. We all have different astronomical symbols. There are Sheep, Boar, Rooster, Dragon, Monkey, Crab and even a couple of Fish. (That was the joke, since I am of the Boar sign). I am the bad seed. I am the body of evil. We are the House of which myself is the low life. I am the Pride. I am the Pride's Broom.

There have been many trials of judgmental proportions where the accused and convicted witnessed a spectacle magnificent with their accusers, and rejoiced in a union that bound together different nations. I am having the worstest, grandest judgmental that I ever been remembering my entire life. I can hardly swallow. It's not a judgment to see if I don't belong here. I know I don't belong here because I have accepted guilt as part of my actions. It is not a punishment for everyone, but for "myself." It's more like a Kindergarten Fair. You remember the Kindergarten Fairs where the kids were given gold ribbons but I was given those "let me downs" for the great events and things I did during the year? It's going to be something like that. The Brick Testament mentions five days of rejection are to be given onto me as punishments.

You know, one of the worst things about being myself - in fact it's sad- there are no friends here, only loneliness. It's a little bit like when I was Hima's age and would watch Masked Fighter Hero and later Code Junkies. I didn't know what friendship was. Of course Penny and I were all best friends at one time before my acts messed you up.

I'm sorry. I'm trailing off about you again. I'm so depressed about being myself that I'm getting carried away. I can't get too deep here since I'm not Dr. Phil - heck - I can't even explain the geometric mean of Kermit and Cheech. After all the songs I heard I found the best chorus of Rock-afire was a little song I came across entitled:

The Infinity

All in One

And One in two

And the One in the back

I cried for you.

If you don't have the courage, you need to get hold of your daughter. I won't be around too much longer. I prefer writing personal notes but do what your heart desires. Go to Mr. Taylor's apartment and talk with him. After you listen to the whole conversation, talk with Penny and explain the instructions I gave you in this letter.

I'm already one of the worst brats in the suburbs. I know it all; figure it out, whatever your heart desires. I won't be here much longer. Think about it. Try to get the recommended essentials if you can, at least get the DVD "The Broodwich Project".

I need to mention the "Stay-Stuffed Battered Bunny". I'm sure you haven't heard about it. No one has heard about a 100-foot battered bunny - you know Happy Bunny. You won't be able to express your anger without it. So what! Don't beat up your stuffed bunny. Please, please, please, DON'T USE YOUR HAPPY BUNNY TO GET ANGRY. If you do it's all torn apart. You're losing your mind.

There is one more piece of info that I need to give you and I'm not quite sure. I have a tendency to "sugar-talk" with you but this can't be sour-proofed. The only way I can see for you to get from what you're doing now to where I am now is that not only will you have to pass through your hidden emotions, but also you will probably have to shed a child's tear for refusing to give up the "Happy Bunny." It's a shame. It really is. But you had your way, just like I had. It would have been so much easier back when Penny and I were in the park so that you can accept forgiveness into your heart. It's going to be hard at times, really hard to swallow, but you can do it. YOU HAVE TO LET FORGIVENESS IN YOURSELF. Imagine that I used to act like myself in your house. Even if I have to be 100 meters away, that compared to your daughter Penny would be like one tiny piece of chocolate compared to all the flavors. It's the same with you. Even if you have to shed 7 tears of pain and even if you have to shed a child's tear; compared to the harmonic universe is like a tiny star in the sky compared to all the stars in the galaxy.

Hope you see me soon.

Your daughter's friend in tears,

Shin