From Egs Mayhem

This article was written by Robert Benchley in 1924. In it, Paul Revere sees the America of the future, and decides against his famous midnight ride to warn of the Redcoat attack. It’s could be consiered as still rather pertinent, especially the part near the end about young men “giving their arms and legs and lives for Something to Be Determined Later.” Here, it is translated into Uryuomoco by Jeremy _I_Am.

Kuar Lobolo roukoja yumgeh fyuc cujjro.

“Chleatf oboli Nyujjrocoz byurauto umja huln, Voais, erja tyulr!” fo quoyuckoloja yum fyuc nulo’c oul, umja choi quolo ehh.

Umja, uc fo lejo, cho juamgroais kuglyueg cuq uc yum u byucyuem (yum husg, yug quuc u byucyuem) cho hagalo eh cho rumja geh quoyuseh fo quuc vlyumtot hloojen.

Fo cuq u famjloja umja gom nyurayuem koekro, cho nom yum jolvyuoc, cho quenom yum horg fugc quyuch ryuggro vequc em cho gek. Fo quc chon kaysot emo umechol yum umja eag eh gleraoi-sulc em choyul quui geh umja hlen quelp, ujjot ak hyutaloc yumsellosgri ura nelmot umja cavglusgot chom yumsellosgri ura uhgolmeem, quyuch gyuno eag ug 12:30 hel hlecgoja seeserugoc umja kyunomgeh seooco cumjquyuseoc. Fo cuq hyuhgi nyurayuem eh chon gliot geh klobomg cho echol cyuzgi nyurayuem hlen jeot quoeg choi quumgoja geh jeh, umja cho cyuzgi nyurayuem gliot geh klobomg cho hyuhgi nyurayuem hlen jeot quoeg choi quumgoja geh jeh. Fo cuq chon ura kuiot guzoc geh u hoq famjloja eh choyul manvol hel lammot cho tebolmnomg boli vujri. Fo cuq gom nyurayuem chyum seyurjlom quelpot umja gom cheacumja hug seyurjlom kruiot yum cho quuln cumjc. Umja meq umja utuyum fo cuq hyubo nyurayuem ieachc, seooloja em vi u famjloja nyurayuem orjolc quyuch huraom ulseoc, nulseot eag geh tyubo choyul ulnc umja rotc umja ryuboc hel Cenochot geh Vo Jogolnyumoja Rugol. Umja ebol ura fo cuq cho Cgulc umja Cglyukoc hraggolot yum cho ulgyuhyusyuur vlooxo eh um orosglyus hum ekol ugoja vofyumja cho csomoc.

Ceh gattot ug cho loyumc fo ioraoja, “Quoeu, Voais! Quo’lo teot vusp geh cho cguvro.”