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Adventure 1

{Dylan is sitting on the couch reading the paper. Brooks comes in from the front door with several grocery bags.}

BROOKS: I'm ho-ome!

DYLAN: Did you get the milk?

BROOKS: ..whoops, I forgot.

DYLAN: GOD DAMMIT

the end

Adventure 2

{Dylan is using the bathroom in his and Brooks' apartment. He hears his front door open.}

BROOKS: Dylan? Where are you?

DYLAN: I'm taking the browns to the super bowl!

BROOKS: I get it!

{There is a pause}

BROOKS: Hey, is it okay if we get a cat?

DYLAN: Dude, bills are enough as is. We can't afford a cat right now.

CAT: meow

DYLAN: GOD DAMMIT

the end

Adventure 3

{Dylan and Brooks are looking at their new cat}

DYLAN: What should we name him?

BROOKS: I'm not sure...

{The cat barfs up some loose change.}

BROOKS: I got it! We'll name him Coin!

DYLAN: Hey yeah, that's a swell name!

COIN: baw

DYLAN: GOD DAMMIT

the end

Adventure 4 (FAN ADVENTURE)

{Dylan and Brooks are watching TV together. They are sitting in different chairs because they're not gay okay?}

DYLAN: Man, I haven't watched TV this exciting in a long time!

BROOKS: Yeah, this is pulse-pounding!

{Coin gets on Dylan's lap.}

DYLAN: Aww, hey Coin!

{Coin sits on the remote control and changes it to Oxygen.}

DYLAN: COIN GET OUT OF HERE

BROOKS: COIN GET OUT

{Coin leaves and cries.}

DYLAN: GOD DAMMIT

the end

Adventure 5

{Dylan walks in the apartment, with a loosened tie. He has a goofy grin on his face.}

DYLAN: Hey, Coin! That was a great first date I just went on! Where's Brooks? Broo-oks?

{silence}

DYLAN: Oh, well. Hey, my date is probably about to call me and invite me out for a second time! I can't wait!

{Dylan walks over to the phone and sits next to it. Time passes. One hour later, the phone rings.}

DYLAN: Yes! {picks up the phone} Hello?

BROOKS: I totaled the car.

DYLAN: GOD DAMMIT

the end

Adventure 6

{It is Sunday morning. Dylan is asleep in bed, and Brooks is all dressed up.}

BROOKS: We're going to church!

DYLAN: GOD DAMMIT

the end

Adventure 7

{A charming young man with a >:I face walks in the doorway. He is wearing gingham and Adidas shoes.}

bluebry: i think this sucks

{Dylan and Brooks look at each other.}

{They bukkake all over bluebry.}

bluebry: gosh darnit