Ajax Smith

Part-old, part-man, all-American teacher who happens to be sometimes drunk. Or perhaps oftentimes.
Possesses old man nipples, and hair in every place that doesn't need it, to boot.
Despite his appearance, is a remarkable fighter with his two fists, Love and Peace.
- His record as displayed so far in the story has been 1-0; winning almost effortlessly.
- He has stated that he has taken down enemies of the state with his pelvis. Given his observed proficiency in fighting, this may actually be true.