The Bronwyn Incident

From The Extended Group

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The Bronwyn Incident took place in the Summer of 2002 and was widely regarded as very ridiculous by most members involved.

Contents

The Premise

Earlier that year, Jamie had begun online relations with a girl who had attended Shorecrest High School, but then had moved to Portland, OR. The girl, Bronwyn, had wanted to meet with Jamie at some point, as up until that point, they're conversation had been confined to AOL Instant Messanger conversations and the occasional phonecall made with a calling card purchased at 7-11. Logistically, it was more difficult to pull off than had previously imagined, driving to Portland would take the better part of a day, and his parents, ever suspicious of his activities, would certainly not approve. An elaborate ruse was set up, claiming that Jamie was required to show up for work at 7:30 AM and after his shift, would be attending a BBQ with his friends. Jamie needed company and navigational aid, so he asked good friends Terry and Lukas to join him. Thinking of the possible adventure, the pair readily agreed. Unfortunately at the last minute, Terry's mom put a stop to his ambitions and the expedition was narrowed to just Jamie and Lukas.

The Trip

True to his word, Jamie showed up at Lukas's house in his white Toyota Corolla around 7AM. Lukas had to avoid questions by family friend Mark who was staying with the Peter's at the time while on job training. (Mark, a 20 year Navy veteran always got up early to jog) Lukas packed a large freezer bag of doritos as well as some bottled drinks. Southbound the pair drove at speeds approaching 90mph at times. Making excellent time, the Corolla crossed the Willamette River into Portland before 10 AM, arriving in less than 2 hours and 45 minutes. Following hasty mapquest directions, Jamie and Lukas drove past PGE Park and to the "Portland Towers" apartment complex.

The encounter

Jamie assured Lukas he would be back for him soon, worked up his courage and went to the callbox and was let in. Lukas sat in the car on the chilly morning listening to the radio and occasionally eating chips. After 30 minutes or more had passed, Lukas became wary that Jamie may have temporarily forgotten him. Not really knowing what to do, he went to the call box and scrolled through names until he found a last name that sounded correct. Calling up, he inquired if Jamie was there, and if he could come down. A pleasant sounding woman answered and said that they would be down shortly. After several more moments, Jamie and Bronwyn emerged from the apartment and Lukas was introduced to her.

Lost in Portland

It was decided that Lukas should go see some movies whilst the couple carried out their activities and so directions were solicited from Bronwyn and Lukas was given $5 by Jamie for the movie. Lukas took Jamies keys and began to drive off unfamiliar with the new car (and still on a temporary drivers license) Following the directions to the best of his abilities in this strange city, Lukas could not find the theater. Driving up and down one-way streets he became more and more disoriented. Just wanting to park so he could get his bearings, he followed a main arterial by the river, which appeared to be headed out of town. Circling back, he drove through the industrial district where he noticed workers eating their lunches and realized how hungry he was. Stopping at a Burger King, Lukas got some fries and ate them thinking about where he should go next. He decided to drive back into the main part of downtown and try to find a theater, any theater, which was open. At long last, Lukas found a movie theater in the downtown after more than 2 hours of searching.

The next problem was finding parking in the congested area. He tried to park on the street several times but could never find a space big enough and his fledgling parallel parking skills were not up to par. Finally, he found a parking garage and pulled in to park. He left and entered the theater to watch the already in progress "Bourne Identity". The movie was better than expected and Lukas left somewhat relieved that he had killed 2 hours or so, but knowing there was more to come. He left the theater and returned to the parked car and drove to the gate of the garage. The attendent told him that the bill was $9 which panicked Lukas somewhat because he wasnt sure he had that much, after coming up with about $5, he began frantically searching Jamies ash-tray, eventually resorting to nickels and dimes as a line of cars formed behind him. Finally he was able to pay and left.

Lukas thought he would locate a park where he could relax, and so he drove back in the direction of the apartment to locate a park. Driving up a steep hill, he finally located the Rose Garden park and found a place to park. Walking alone on this now sunny and warm day, Lukas felt calmed. He found a nice grassy spot to lay down and rest looking up at the sky. He sat there for approximately an hour until deciding it was time to return and collect Jamie at the agreed upon 5PM. After almost getting lost again Lukas showed up a bit early and sat in the sun eating doritos for a while, listening to 94.7 FM (the local alternative rock station). Minutes ticked by and he didnt know where Jamie had gone.

Finally around 5:15, he called the call-box but to no avail. (This was in the days before cell phones became widely used) Lukas waited until 5:40 when Jamie finally arrived. The pair then left town, pausing to fill the gas tank, and then driving North back to Seattle. Jamie, claiming that his leg was sore from "Bronwyn sitting on it" insisted that Lukas drive, which he did. Jamie refused to discuss details, but sufficed to say that he had kissed her, but had not had sex. The pair continued on and finally returned home after a long, adventerous day.

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