Stuff That's Wrong With Nick

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Revision as of 19:49, 14 June 2007

A currently incomplete list of things that are wrong with Nick, divided up into five categories. Enjoy.

I have cramps in my foot every once in a while. I think it's like, once a month or so, but that's just an estimate.
I have acne on my forehead, as well as a bit on my legs, arms, face, etc.
A shower door fell on my left foot a long time ago, crushing my big toe, so the toenail there is all gross and yellow and tender.
I'm very weak. I can't lift much weight at all. I can barely lift my one cat, Grayson.
Ummm, I'm ugly.
I have very low stamina, and can't run for very long. A few seconds at most, and then I need a loooooooong break.
I am unable to hold my breath for more than around 17 seconds (my record). I have very bad lung capacity, presumably from smoking pot, or from secondhand tobacco smoke.
On certain days, I have uncontrollable coughing fits. This is only on some days. There's no pattern, as far as I know. Apparently is has something to do with postnasal drip, because I keep coughing up mucus. It's really gross.
I have a scar on my right hand from this one time at an amusement park when I touched the side of this huge slide while I was going down it, and the friction ripped some skin off.
I wear glasses for being nearsighted. Apparently my vision has gotten even worse since I started wearing them.

I am failing all my school subjects, even Bible somehow. It is on purpose for the most part.
I have been diagnosed with ADD.
I'm writing a list of stuff that's wrong with me.
I believe that Kentucky Don't Exist.
Most of my friends believe I have Asperger's syndrome. I'm pretty sure I do, too.
I'm afraid of many, many things, mostly stupid stuff that nobody else in teh universe would be afraid of.
I'm stupid. I have some common sense, but not much. I also lack knowledge of pop culture, everyday terms, and lots of other stuff. I plan to keep it that way.
I can't stand certain noises, such as vacuums or styrofoam.
A lot of materials in clothing I can't stand, either. So I only wear loose-fitting, smooth clothes.
I'm a hypochondriac.
I talk to myself a lot. But in my defense, it's usually because I'm roleplaying and I don't have anyone to roleplay with, so I do it with myself.

I am more feminine than masculine.
I cry a lot. Though if there's people around I don't do it out loud.
I'm a sissy/wimp/coward, etc. and I have a very low tolerance for pain.
For some reason, my feelings have been hurt only three times in my entire life.
I'm generally apathetic aboot things that have nothing to do with me or Anna.
I like cats more than most humans.
I succumb to jealousy.
I get really pissed off easily, to the point where I pick up whatever object is lying around and bash people in the head with it. This usually only happens with Mom.

I'm a pervert. I have many, many fetishes, including BDSM, anal sex, panties, scatophilia, etc.
My penis is very small. It's only four and a half inches when fully erect. The average size for my age is six inches, meaning I'm an inch and a half too small.
It takes me a very long time to orgasm (somewhere around an hour or more). Rarely I can manage to do it in around twenty minutes, but only if I'm not distracted by anything, and I have to be really, really horny.
I do not like vaginas. They are gross.
I'm not gay, but I would like to be done up teh butt by a chick with a strap-on.
At one point, I wanted to be a chick, but then decided not to because I was afraid of periods and childbirth.
I'm a transvestite.

Despite being a Christian, I sin like, all the time. Stealing, lying, cheating, etc.
Often when I'm praying, I ramble on and on aboot stuff. Plus, I talk to God exactly like I talk to my friends, and saying "and like..." and "and stuff" all the time.
Also I'm probably not praying correctly anyway.
I get pissed off easily by people who are overly-religious, like Christians who say Halloween, Pokémon, jackin' off, video games, etcetera are against God. I often flame those kinds of people.
Most of my friends are atheists, I think. I don't know, I haven't really asked many people what religion they are.

@@ Line 33: / Line 33: @@
 *I'm generally apathetic aboot things that have nothing to do with me or Anna.
 *I like cats more than most humans.
+*I succumb to jealousy.
+*I get really pissed off easily, to the point where I pick up whatever object is lying around and bash people in the head with it. This usually only happens with Mom.
 ===Sexually===