Episodes

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Introduction

The following is a list of episodes in all seasons, presented in bite-sized formats which may be elaborated on. There are usually ten episodes in a season, with one hour-long episode and two fifteen minute episodes. As you may be able to tell, the two main characters, Onion Ring Jack and Grilled Alex are human at first.


Season 1

Season Episode Number Description Aired
Valetown Beginnings 101 At a gas station, two kids buy a chocolate and a slurpee each, seven and eight years of age. Alex and Jack go to pay up, but when the shop clerk heads to get the change machine, Alex heads into the storage room. He looks through for something he could sell. He finds a corked vial of thin, pale green liquid. Placing it on Jack's person so he won't get blamed, They pay up for their candy, have a snack, and head back to the car. to Jack's dismay, their parents are gone. --COMMERICAL BREAK HERE-- They go into the car -- a truck with four kids worth of seating. They place their backpacks in the tiny bit of storage behind their seat, and after a conversation in a locked car, they turn it on. Alex and Jack both drive horribly, whilst wrestling for the controls they head into the watery ditch below...


--COMMERICAL BREAK--
Jack is the first to wake up, and is in a rosy wooden cabin, inside a warm bed. a countryside villa of sorts. a mug of steaming coffee sits next to him on a woven bedstand. He gets up, and is in warm, red, very baggy clothing and hoods. He stands up. Alex doesn't appear to wake up. phased by this, he goes out to the patio to find a twenty-five year old girl and their seventeen and 11/12 son who's packing for college. she explains what happens, and that while Jack is free to leave, she'll send Alex out on a horse if he does. After a conversation about life, he heads just outside, picking ingredients for herbal medicine -- supposedly it should wake up Alex early. along the way, he finds the woman (Christina's) son, Terry. Terry takes him back and lets him know Alex has woken up. He goes to Alex's room, where Jack's backpack is beside him. Alex rolls out of the bed and squishes Jack's backpack. half awake, he hears the vial clank agianst the glass door. Seeing the vial, Jack says "You bastard!" and throws the pollens and herbs in Jack's half-awake face, dazing him. He takes the vial and tosses it in his bag, and heads out. After Jack is gone, Alex awakes fully, and is no longer dazed. Alex has already made his way back to the roadside. Wondering where his parents are, he heads to a comfortable, lush and bushy area of grass where he lies down with his security blanket. the lights in the street turn on providing a little light for him, but they flicker due to low maintenance. He examines the vial and considers taking a sip of it, when Alex comes tumbling down the hill. After a long conversation and a few punches are delivered, the vial shatters and a pint lands in both of their mouths. It fades for a few seconds, uses a bumper, and reappears. They began to grow muscular and taller. More mature and more masculine -- their hair grows and they age. Time passes and thoughts speed through their head, as if they fall asleep. when they finally "wake up" into consciousness they are exactly eighteen years of age. It seems the area around them aged, but not Christina's house in the distance. "Welcome to Valetown" is written, and they head in that direction...

Pilot episode @ website
Breaking and Entering 102 The first scene shows the two boys -- now men -- traversing the dark roadside, passing trenches, and llamas as they go. Alex falls asleep, and has a dream of being Tony Montana, they call him Aleu Robana. In the end of his dream, whilst Jack is tapping on his back to get him to wake up, he gets shot with a missile and the chunks of his body fly below. "The Pond is Yours" captions above. He wakes up to having hitched a ride with a redneck, and they arrive in a Market strip mall. Before getting out, Alex and Jack both give the redneck a finger -- Jack one finger, Alex two. They jump out and the redneck drives off. They find themselves in a strip mall of gas-guzzling SUVs, dark fog, and chinese resturaunts. Alex beigns to complain about being hungry. Jack says he's already fat enough, and Alex tells him to fuck off. They go to the chinese resturaunts. "CHINESE FOO! YOU WANT CHINESE FOO!" Jack says, "Umm, whatever," but the chinese man takes $4 from them almosti nstantly and gives them each a bowl of raw noodles. "Thank you, prease come again!" They leave, and find themselves stranded. Atfer they're stranded, and find a college through the thick fog, Jack blinks twice. And Alex goes, "Look, mofo! College!" Jack says, "What do you think I am, blind, fatass?" He goes like "I'm not an f'in' fatass, nark!" Jack says, "Yeah, you're just big-boned." and they walk past the cars, like a maze, and they show a bird's eye view, pacman-style. The ghosts are shopping carts. A college kid (Terry Tanman) asks "Do you wanna place to stay?" They end up staying, after persuasion, they end up in a four-dorm, and they walk into the school. January 6, 2009 @ website
A Substanial School 103 The episode begins with the two inside the college; The college itself is huge. Terry shows them around. The cafeteria, with giant foodfights, the empty classrooms, the full library, and most of all -- the outdoor areas, with fisticuffs and even gun travesties. but, he offers to show them the Liberty City (An actual term meaning an anarchy; freedom; the slums) of the school, and they accept. He takes the ladder down a well, but the two jump, but miracously don't break any bones. They notice Alex has more hair and grease on his chest, and is fatter, and Jack is getting taller, a little muscle (not much), and generally more like a basketball player. They follow Terry through the various areas; WOW 77, with dancing women and everyone acting like Arabians; The Mark-et, a market ruled by the College Mafia, the various dorm rooms, past wall-embedded microwaves and payphones, past dial-up internet boxes, and to a four-room dorm. They each get their own seperate room and a main hall. Jack chooses the quartz-filled one with a computer and a frier, plus a fridge and closet, but no bed, Jack chooses the messy one, and Terry and his girlfriend pick theirs. The main hall has a fireplace and several microwaves, and about twenty pounds of Witchcraft Dinner. They all go to sleep, save for Jack, whom ventures out to WOW 77 and does the matrix upon being shot, narrowly escaping to the mountainous dirt clumps of Hell's Point, and falling asleep there. January 11, 2009 @ website
Mumei 104 Summary: Jack gets addicted to the new MMORPG sensation, Mumei, as with the rest of the well, while the Republican house plays Solitaire over and over, in hopes to beat the college world record of 78,544 successive solitaire plays. January 16, 2009 @ website
Sergeant! 105 Focuses on Jack's life before Valetown, and a bit about him being in the war. January 19, 2009 @ website
The Time is Now 106 The only hour long episode in Season 1, shows how Jack and Alex met. January 22, 2009 @ website
Fillerbot 2000 107 The editors become madly desperate to stall time, and hire Fillerbot 2000 to create filler. he fails after 15 minutes of work, and the episode cuts off with the maker's contact information. January 24, 2009 @ website
The Drugs 108 After Fillbot is destroyed, the editors know they are defeated; they continue the story, but after they exit and are back in the thick of Valetown, it cuts off. January 27, 2009 @ website
Back at College 109 Documents a few flashbacks and they finally get back to the safety of their double-dorm. January 29, 2009 @ website
The Food 110 They try the drugs.. just one, maybe. but... January 31, 2009 @ website




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