Piggy's Day/To a dark place
From Create Your Own Story
The elevator stops after going up for what feels like ten minutes. It makes a *ding* sound and the doors open into a very dark room. Only the elevator is lit by a spotlight.
Piggy: "Uh... Hello?"
The lights come on, and you see that you are in fact, in a television studio.
Host: "Let's give a round of applause for our new contestants!"
There is a studio audience composed entirely of angels right next to you. On the back wall you can see a large logo reading: "My Escape from Helt".
Captain: "Ah-HAHAHAHAAAA! Oh wow, this turned out silly."
Marine: "What?"
Captain: "We're on TV, and this is my favourite show: "My Escape from Helt!"
Piggy: "Are we still in Hell?"
Host: "Not quite. Come over here and I'll explain how this works."
The three of you sit down on a chouch with three more people. One of them is an obese woman, one of them is a young child and one is apparently a demon.
Host: "'My Escape from Helt' is a show that's only broadcasted in Heaven, and on Earth on christmas day. The contestants have nothing to lose. You are one of the, on average, half a dozen of people who manage to escape from Helt each day. We want you to share your experiences, before we let you in Heaven."
You look over your shoulder.
Piggy: "If there's nothing to lose, then how come there's a gigantic obstacle course behind us?"
Host: "That's just to expand the running time of the show. While we wait for more contestants, please share your stories - how did you escape?"
Captain: "Piggy, would you start?"
You go on telling your entire story, from the moment you woke up today to the point where it all went to shit and you fell out of a window on a four-dimensional wall. At the point you mention your meeting with Michael Bonbons, the captain interrupts you.
Captain: "Wait, WHAT!? Michael Bonbons? You mean to tell me that the man had a tank of sea monsters under his office?"
Piggy: "That's what I just said! What, aren't all world leaders horribly corrupt in this day and age?"
Captain: "But I work for the government and Michael is my employer! He personally asked me to participate in this mission, and I almost refused. I can't comprehend what might've happened if I had done that!"
Host: "But in what point did you die, then?"
Marine: "We're not dead. We tried digging into the core of the Earth and accidentally struck Helt. Then we simply found a map showing where the exit was."
Host: "Whoops. It seems we've made an error. Sorry, you don't have to participate to our show. But you can still try the obstacle course if you wish."
You:
