Try to reason with the thugs
From Create Your Own Story
"Why, helloooo there!"
You try to smile engagingly, but a fruit fly chooses this moment to fly into your throat, causing you to hack and cough in a rather unladylike and decidedly un-engaging manner.
"Now, I'm sure we can *HACK* find some kind of *COUGH* common ground," you choke out, stumbling backwards as the thugs draw uncomfortably near. "The world is *HORK* full of so much *SPIT* violence, why don't we just..."
You trail off in mid-sentence; one look at their faces tells you that they see no problem whatsoever with making the world a more violent place. This may not have been the best plan.
Putting as much space between you and those very solid clubs as possible, while still trying to clear the disgusting taste of bug from your mouth, you stagger down the hall until you find yourself backed against your fat neighbour's enormous, immovable gut, with the goons poised to strike. Tears sting your eyes as you realize the hopelessness of your predicament. What was the point of surviving infancy and several outbreaks of the plague just to have your head bashed in by these Neanderthals?
Your relatively brief, unproductive life flashes before you eyes as you: