Don't be an idiot!
From Create Your Own Story
YOU: The Normandy's dead! Just like us if we don't get out of here!
YOU: Also, seriously, dude, look at this thing. There's a hole in the roof big enough for a cinematic planet backdrop to fit in. She's not coming out of this. Look at it, honestly.
You are interrupted by the arrival of LASERS.
Joker quickly decides to stop JERKING AROUND and you both race to the ESCAPE PODS. Joker is able to survive in THE PITILESS VACUUM OF SPACE with only a BREATHING MASK, possibly because he's voiced by SETH GREEN.
JOKER: They're coming around for another attack!
You get JOKER into the escape pod, but are suddenly thrown out by an EXPLOSION. The LASER blazes through your route to the POD and you heroically press a button to eject the pod and save SETH GREEN. Another EXPLOSION rocks you back as the NORMANDY falls apart. Buffetted by the WRECKAGE, you are thrown into THE VOID. Your suit leaking, your crew dead, you fall down towards the planet below.
You die. For a brief moment your corpse becomes a falling star, reflected on the cold planets surface, as the camera pans up and fades out to the title.
MESS EFFECT 2
A Choose-your-own Adventure parody.
Inspired by Mock Effect.
