Sex in Ancient Rome:Hercules

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Hercules (or Heracles if you're into his original, greek title); perhaps one of the greatest, most famous heroes of ancient days ever remembered! Originally a son of Amphitryon and Alkmene, you had been given divine origins, and it's been said that Jupiter disguised himself as your father and fucked your mother (to add some godly juices to your conception), which of course attracted the fatal attention of Jupiter's wife; Juno. She decided to have you killed and sent two snakes to kill you as an infant. Of course, being the god-like little bugger that you were, you killed them with ease, which only pissed her off worse.

Juno decided to mess your life up a bit more. So once you were adult and married to the foxy girl Megara; Juno drove you mad so that you in your insanity murdered your wife along with your six children. Crushed by guilt, you saught the advise of Apollo who told you to place yourself at the service of King Eurystheus. Unbeknownst to you however: Juno told the king to give you twelve impossible tasks in hope that they'd kill you. The tasks would forever be known as the "Twelve labors of Hercules".


It was an early morning in July when the king called you into his throne room, where he was sitting on his throne next to his wife; both wearing brightly colored togas as beautiful-looking slave girls fanned them with massive, tropical leaves. You kneel before both of them respectfully, as is expected from you as a person in his service

"Hercules!" Eurystheus said in-between being fed with grapes by his wife. "I've called you in here today because there's a terrible situation going on in Nemea. "A lion is terrorizing the townsfolk, and my guards can't do squat to stop him. I need you to kill it."

"My king!" you replied. "I will cut the beast's head off with a mere swing of my sword, and bring it to you!"

"Yeah, no, I don't think that'll be possible." he scuffed and opened his mouth as the wife playfully fed him another grape. "The Lion is invulnerable to weapons. Otherwise I would've just sent a regiment of soldiers."

"For crying out loud, my lord! You're sending me alone, without any help, to kill a foe that can't be killed?"

"Ayup. But I have faith in you, Hercu-leeze. Take your time.". Eurystheus gave you a thumbs up, twirled his moustache and then started to fondle his giggling wife. You take the hint, and ready yourself to go.

Do you:

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