Mario
From Crapedia
The Mario series is the second franchise from nintendope, and unlike DK's crap fest, it didn't suck. Instead of jumping over barrels, you had to jump into ceilings and knock off endangered species and other retarded concepts for pokemans. It starred to plumbers who got layed off from construction working because Mario was an ass to their boss in the past (cause we all know, never be a dick to anyone or else you're their bitches for the future). After much plumbing, they find their way into the wonderland where they find a princess of living ingredients for drugs, is in danger of being raped by a giant turtle with spikes. The rest of the series is pretty friggin random.
Characters
Mario = Fat pasta eating whore from nintendo. Lord knows you can't get a word out of him lest peach is giving him some lovin, in that case he would go "MAMA MIA!" Or "HEERE WE GO!!!" Other than that, he makes random noises like Link from Zelda.
Luigi = Crybaby who's always in some fat guy's shadow. Millions of freaks on the net just LOVE the understudy so they demanded that he gets his own mansion. Lulz ensued when it was infested with ghosts which scared the shit out of him, then he had to rip off ghost busters to save his fatass brother again.
Peach = The equivalent to Jessica Simpson, being that she is a complete tard and is annoying as hell.
Toad = Doesn't deserve to be bolded, obviously because he's fucking pathetic.
Yoshi = The best character EVER!
Bowser = Horny Gamera clone. Has seven kids that haven't seen the light of day since Super Mario World. Gets totally pwned in SSBM
Wario = Even more of a fatass, he was bullied by Mario at young ages, which why he tried to pwn him in "wrecking crew", Super Mario land 2, and Mario Party. Now he runs his own game company cause he's a pimp like that, jackin Ashely and all them hoes to be in his new joint: NOA BEACH VOLLEY BALL!
Waluigi = Mario brothers vs Wario Brothers! HURRR IT'S BRILLIANT!!!
Daisy = From Super Mario Land 1, she is the princess of a kingdom no one gives a shit about. Cept those damn Space monsters.
Baby Bowser = Who is this guy fuckin to get so many kids!?
Everyone else = Doesn't Matter.