Page 190: Stories 4-6
From Accct Wiki
Long time ago, somewhere in a place known as Unnamed Countryside, there lived an old couple named Link and Zelda (imagine them with white hair and wrinkles).
Link used to be called the Hero of Time, but now he’s y our everyday old geezer. Well, not so everyday, since he still keeps himself fit. Zelda is your everyday housewife who does house works and keeps her husband busy at bed during nighttime.
One day, Zelda went down to the river to take a bath. Don’t worry; she’s wearing a bathing suit so you do not get to see anything titillating, and plus, she’s supposed to be an old woman in this story. Do you really want to see an old woman who is in the buff? No, right?
So anyway, while Zelda is enjoying herself in the cool water, she spots something coming down the current. At first glance, it looks like a pink butt flowing down the river, but after closer inspections, it turns out to be a giant peach! “What a big peach!” she exclaims. “I’ll take it home and eat it all by myself without letting Link know!” So she got the peach and walks up to the bank.
Since the peach is so big (about the size of a human), it’s naturally quite heavy. Zelda is having a hard time lifting it, but manages to pull herself straight. Things seem to be going quite well when she suddenly slipped on a banana peel left behind by some ape named Donkey Kong. She falls face first onto the ground and the peach drops onto the ground and rolls forward like a bowling ball. “MY PEACH!!!!!!” she screams.
The peach keeps on rolling and rolling and rolling and rolling and rolling until it reached her house.
“What’s that noise?” asks Link, stepping out from the house to see what’s going on. “Whoa!” He sees the giant peach coming, but was too late to dodge it and gets hit by it and they both went crashing back into the house.
CRAAAAAAAAAAAASH!!!!!!!
Zelda finally caught up and runs inside the house, and sees that the whole place is ruined and the peach is on the far end of the house, with Link having his head stuck into the side of the peach. “I was hoping Link wasn’t home to see this…” says Zelda with a sigh.
“Ooomph! Ged me owd!!!!” screams Link with his head in the peach while trying to pull himself out.
Zelda grabs his leg and tries her best to pull him out. After some struggling, Link finally pops his head out from the peach, but they both are sent shooting backwards from the momentum.
CRAAAAAAAAAAAASH!!!!!!!
Link shakes his head and wipes the juice of his face. “Phew… I thought I’m gonna get smothered…”
They both got back up and went to the peach. “Now that’s the biggest peach I’ve ever seen!” says Link.
“I found it at the river,” explains Zelda. “I was thinking of making some desserts out of it so we can enjoy it.”
“Good idea! I’ll cut it open.” Link got his sword and unleashes a swipe at the side of the peach, cutting out one-third of it.
Then they saw the strangest thing in their life. There is a little baby inside the peach! Zelda pulls the baby out and made it stop crying. “What a cute little baby!”
“So this is where baby comes from…” says Link.
“Your parents never told you the truth?”
“Nope.”
To make a long story short, they adopted the baby and named him Pit, because he was found where the peach pit (another term for peach seed) should be.
-
Pit proved to be a very different boy from all others. He has wings! It was either amazement to everyone else or a subject teasing to those nasty bullies.
“Nya! Nya! Look at da birdy boy!” laugh Pokey and his evil bully minions as they pull his wings.
Or maybe…
“Oh lookie! A birdy boy! How awesome!” exclaims Crazy Hand as he touches his wings excitedly.
But Pit, being a very good boy that he is, never bothered to fight back or cry. He just let everything slide off.
Everyone’s view towards him changed as he grew older. He proved to be a very helpful at home, helping his foster parents with everything that doesn’t involve in bed during night time. Zelda and Link are, to say, very happy about having such a nice child. “Now I can relax my old age body for once,” says Zelda happily.
“Don’t make him push himself too hard, Zelda,” Link reminds her. “He’s still young and has his limits. We should teach him everything we know before retiring.”
After he’s done on his current job, cleaning the yard, Pit goes to his foster parents and asks, “I’m done, father and mother. Do you need my help anymore?”
“Of course,” says Zelda with some sort of a not-so-pleasant-looking smile. “Now you should clean the house, mow the lawn, wash the clothes, go shopping, tend the garden, and fix that hole on the roof! I’ll give you more task after you’re done with those.”
“Yes, mother,” says Pit, and he goes off to his job.
Link looks at Zelda strangely and says, “You’re pushing him too much, aren’t you?”
“Who cares?” And Zelda went off to take a snooze.
“Jeez… She’s not like what I use to know her anymore…” says Link while shaking his head sadly.
-
Pit is now shopping out in the market. “Let’s see… Onions, carrots, potatoes, curry powder…” he says to himself (he’s reading the shopping list).
Everywhere he went, people would greet him.
“Hello, Pit!”
“How are you today?”
“Out shopping for your parents? Good boy!”
“Come buy here! I’ll give you a discount!”
“Nice to see you again, Pit!”
Pit is very well known all over the town because of the way he was born and his appearance. Plus, being a very attentive and good boy makes everyone adore him and even his enemies became his friends!
To make a long story short so we can skip to more exciting parts, Pit bought the stuffs and is at the counter paying the money. All of a sudden, an explosion is heard and people’s scream can be heard too.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! THE THIEVES ARE HERE!!!!!!” they scream.
Indeed, the well known band of thieves called the Gerudo, which consists of all female except for their leader Ganondorf, is raiding market! Ganondorf must be lucky to be living among tons of girls. “Steal everything and show no mercy to anyone who opposes us!” he commands his followers.
The Gerudo thieves charge into the marketplace and run down everything that got in their way. They stole, plunder, destroy, kill, do stuff, and many thing more, and it is certainly not a pleasant sight. Ganondorf just stood there and laugh at everything is happening evilly.
While he is laughing, Pit shows up in front of him and says, “How can you do that?”
“Because I’m a thief, brat!” replies Ganondorf meanly.
“You are not allowed to do this kind of thing! You should be like everyone else!”
“Why should I follow the rules of normal people? Get lost, brat!” Ganondorf slaps Pit in the face and sends him rolling aside.
“Ow!” However, Pit got back up and tried to fight back, only to get beaten up again and again.
“You’re getting on my nerves, kid!” says Ganondorf angrily. He got out his sword and readies to kill him. “I will kill you!”
Suddenly, some of Pit’s friends show up and hop onto Ganondorf and bind him. “Run for your life, Pit!” shouts one of them, Ness. “You have been so nice to us, so now it’s our chance to repay you!”
Pit hesitated, because he doesn’t want his friend to be left behind. However, after much convincing from the friends, he finally turned around and ran. “I’ll come back to help you all again, everyone!” he said to himself.
-
Pit ran back home and told his foster parents everything, so Link quickly got his sword and hopped onto his old horse, but is unreliable by now, so he just ran on his foot to the marketplace instead.
When he got there, all he saw was the remains of the market. There are dead and injured people everywhere, and houses are all ruined. “This is terrible…” says Link.
Pit comes up to this place and gasps at the horrible sight before him. “Everything’s destroyed…”
-
After a while, the dead are buried and the injured people are being treated. The town council arranged a meeting to discuss what must be done, for this is not the first time this has happened and long have they suffered these attacks. They must prevent this from happening again!
However, everyone is afraid to face Ganondorf and his band of thieves, for they are really powerful and the last person (played by Barney) who went to challenge him never came back.
-
Back at home…
“Aye… We’re almost out of food, but the market still isn’t rebuilt…” says Zelda.
“The thieves really stole a lot this time,” says Link. “It can take a while for things to recover.”
“But can we last until that time? I’m afraid we won’t have breakfast tomorrow morning…”
“No…”
Pit saw that everyone is depressed and the whole place is devastated. He really wishes that he could be of more help. After much pondering, he finally came to the decision.
-
“WHAT?! You want to go fight Ganondorf and bring back everything he stolen?!” gasp his foster parents.
“Please let me do it, father and mother!” says Pit. “If we do not put an end to him, we cannot live a happy life! I must put an end to this once and for all!”
“But it’s too dangerous!” says Zelda. “The last warrior that we sent, Barney the Dinosaur, did not come back, and we all assumed that he’s dead!”
“But…”
“Let him try, Zelda,” says Link.
“Are you insane?!” asks Zelda in shock.
“This is good opportunity for him to prove himself. After all, I did pass down my swordsman skills to him.”
“But it’s still too dangerous!”
“Let me do it, mother!” says Pit. “I will come back alive for sure! I will surely put father’s skills to use!”
After much convincing, they both agree to let Pit go and defeat to Ganondorf. After this, Link went off to make a brand new weapon for him while Zelda went to make some foods for him to take along.
-
The next day, Pit is outside the house, armed with the new weapon Link made for him. “This is not only a bow,” explains Link. “You can also break it into twin knives to use.”
“Thank you, father,” says Pit politely.
“Furthermore, these are not ordinary arrows. These arrows have been passed down through my family for generations. It has mysterious powers and is effective against evil people.”
“I will use it wisely, father.”
Then Zelda comes out of the house with a bag in her hand, which she offers to Pit. “Take this with you, my son. It contains delicious foods made from secret ingredients passed down from my family for generations. It is said to give people huge boost of strength and will surely aid you in your quest.”
“Thank you, mother.”
After saying good-bye, Pit finally sets off to fight the evil Ganondorf and his minions.
-
So Pit is walking down this long road that leads to the harbor, for the thieves’ hideout is out at sea and he would need a boat to get there.
Then he sees someone furry lying on the road, so he quickly runs to it. “Are you all right, mister?” The person turns out to actually be a fox.
“I’m so hungry…” says the fox weakly.
“You can have some of my food,” says Pit, reaching into his bag. He gave a bit of the contents to the fox, who eats it happily. Instantly, as if by magic, the fox springs back up with lots of energy.
“I have never felt much better than this!” says the fox.
“Wow! Mother was right when she said it gives people lots of power!” exclaims Pit.
-
Back home…
“What was the secret ingredient that you put in the food?” Link asks Zelda. “I’ve never heard about any secret ingredients passed down in your family generation.”
“Actually…” says Zelda, “it’s energy-boosting steroids…”
-
Back to Pit…
“My name is Fox,” the fox says to Pit.
“I can tell that just by looking…” replies Pit.
“For your kindness, I will follow wherever you go and do whatever I can to help you.”
“But I’m going to fight Ganondorf and his thieves. It will be hard.”
“I will help you all I can! Please let me lend you a hand!”
“If you insist…”
And so, the dog… I mean the fox, joins Pit in his voyage to save the day.
The duo continues on the road when suddenly an ape drops down from the tree. “Get back, master!” says Fox, getting in front of Pit.
The ape gets up and sniffs the air, and then heads towards Pit. “Food…”
“You must get pass me if you are planning to harm the master!” says Fox.
But the ape didn’t hear him and keeps on moving forward while mumbling about food in his mouth. “Are you hungry?” asks Pit. “I can give you some if you want to. It’s all right, Fox. He’s just hungry.”
“If you say so…”
So Pit offers the ape a bit of his food, and he accepts it happily. “I am Donkey Kong,” says the ape. “I want more! Please!”
“But I only have a limited amount,” says Pit. “How about this, Mr. Donkey Kong? You help me fight Ganondorf and his minions and I will tell my mother to make more for you!”
“Okay!” And so, DK joins him too.
So the team of three keeps on going forward when all of sudden a motorcycle pulls up in front of them. The rider of the bike is a bluebird in leather jacket and shades, and he certainly acts cool. “You’re Pit, I presume,” he says.
“Um, yeah?” asks Pit.
“I heard that you’re challenging the great Ganondorf. If that’s the case, I’ll lend a hand if you want to. But first, I want a taste of the food that you have, for I have been following you since you left home and saw everything.”
Fox whispers into Pit’s ear. “He looks suspicious, master. I think we shouldn’t trust him.”
“I don’t think he’s really someone evil,” says Pit. “He wants to fight Ganondorf too, so he must be a good person.” So Pit offers the bird a bit and he eats it.
“Ah! The perfect kind of food that I like!” says the bird with delight while acting even cooler than before. “In that case, I shall lend you my manly powers of the great Falco! Follow me; I will create the way to the hideout!” And he got onto his bike and zooms towards the harbor before them.
“He’s a strange guy,” says DK.
“Should we trust him, master?” Fox asks Pit.
“Why not? He sounds sincere,” says Pit. So they all go in the direction of the harbor.
-
When they reached there, they see Falco beating up the boat owner, so they quickly run to stop him. “Falco! What are you doing?” asks Pit.
“This guy won’t give us a boat!” says Falco. “So I’m solving things through violence!”
“That isn’t good! We should just ask him politely!” Pit rescues the boat owner from Falco’s hand and asks him politely. “Sir, we would like a boat so we can go to Ganondorf’s hideout.”
“Never, you brat!” grumbles the grouchy owner (played by Cranky Kong). “Ya have to get over my dead body if ya want my boat, ya stinking little twerp! It’s gonna a million years if ya wanna beat me, loser!”
Pit said nothing, but simply walked away and gave a simple command. All three of his companions jump on the boat owner and beat him up cruelly.
BANG! CRASH! CRASH! POW! BANG! WHACK! KICK! SMACK! TRASH! SMASH! KAPOW! POW! WHAM! BLANG!
After beating the boat owner, they got themselves a boat and so, they set off into the sea and towards the hideout, which can be easily seen at the end of the horizon.
-
Meanwhile, at the hideout, Ganondorf is sitting on his throne, enjoying his food and girls. While he is in the middle of having fun, one of his servants came to tell him about someone out there in the sea and heading towards them. “Someone dare comes to my island?” asks Ganondorf. “Let him have it then!”
At his command, the guards prepare their cannons and aim it in the direction of the boat.
-
On the boat, Pit and his three companions are preparing themselves for landing, for the island is not far already. “Are you all ready?” asks Pit. “This will not be a cakewalk.”
“I am ready to help you, master!” says Fox determinedly.
“I’m ready!” says DK while beating his chest.
“Bah! I can beat up every one of them even if I’m not ready!” says Falco proudly. “That’s how good I am!”
Suddenly, they hear the sound of explosion and see a cannonball flying towards them! “Watch out!” gasps Pit. DK got in front of the cannonball and amazingly caught it with his bare hands, and using all his strength, hurls it back to the island again! “Whoa!”
“You’re strong!” exclaims Fox.
“Bah! I can do better than this!” says Falco.
The cannonball flies back directly into the cannon it was shot out of, and then explodes, blasting away the guards near it.
KABOOOOOM!!!!!
“Darn it! We must not let them reach the island!” says the guard leader. “Fire all the cannons!” And all the cannons on the island are fired simultaneously.
“Ah! More are coming!” gasps Pit.
“I’ll handle it myself!” says Falco. He steps onto the front part of the boat and pulls out his laser pistol and takes aim. He pulls the trigger and fires a laser beam, which directly hits a cannonball and blasts it into piece. “Heh! How do you like that?”
“There are more coming!” says Pit.
But the proud bird is too late to notice that there was more than one cannonball. The remaining cannonballs hit the boat and an explosion consumes it.
KABOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!
“Yes! We did it!” exclaim the guards. After the explosion, the boat is nowhere to be seen, so they assume that the people onboard are dead, so they went back to do their duties.
After a while, Pit and his companions emerge at the shore of the island and got onto there secretly so that nobody will notice them. “We made it anyway…” says Pit. “I’m glad we survived…”
“And you said you could do better than me!” DK says to Falco.
“At least it was cooler than what you did!” snaps back Falco.
The group carefully sneak through the island, careful not to raise any alarms. They successfully made it to the front gates of the hideout, where they see two guards protecting it. “I will handle them, master,” Fox says to Pit.
“Be careful,” Pit tells him.
Fox runs towards the gate at a very speed, and though the guards saw him, they had no time to make their move. Fox got in between the two of them and performs a jumping split kick and midair and knocked them both in the head. However, the guards are yet to be down and they try to hit him with their spears. Fox ducks under one of the spears and grabs it, and then forcefully pulls it out the guards grip and hits the one behind him using the back of the spear before swinging at the guard in front of him and knocking her out. The guards at the back got back up and charges at Fox, who jumps into the air and lands behind the guards and kicks her up the butt and knocks her out. After this is taken care of, Fox signals for the others to come, and they did.
“You’re great!” says Pit.
“I can do better!” says Falco.
“I’ll open the door!” says DK. He places his hands at the door and begins pushing, and the others help him also. With all their strengths combined together, they are able to move the massive gate until it is wide.
“Okay! Let’s charge into the hideout and fight the thieves!” says Pit.
“OKAY!” shouted the others. And they all charge toward the building in front of them, ignoring anything in their way.
They got to building and kick down the door forcefully, and found themselves standing in front of several guards and Ganondorf himself. “We’re here to get you, Ganondorf!” says Pit.
“You’re that kid who messed with me at the market,” says Ganondorf. “Quite a surprise that you would come all the way here just to take my head!”
Pit pulls out his bow and places an arrow on it, and aims it in his direction. “I’ll put an end to you here so my country can have peace!”
“You sure talk big for a little kid. I admire that in you! However, your attempt will be futile, as everyone who faced me in the past did no return alive! The last challenger, who was a purple dinosaur, ran off before the fight even started; he was the biggest cowards I’ve ever seen!”
“I have friends on my side! I will not lose to you!”
“I will protect my master!” says Fox.
“I’ll beat you all up!” roars DK while thumping his chest.
“You’re all gonna fall before me!” says Falco.
“Very well; you shall have what you wish for! Guards, get them!” At Ganondorf’s command, the guards all charge forward to fight them.
Fox swiftly runs pass the guards and confuse them with his blinding speed. In fact, he runs so fast that he left behind an illusion! “Fox Illusion!” Then he dashes through the guards very fast and knocks them down one by one.
DK unleashes a huge punch and it single handedly knocked out a huge number guards. Another guard managed to get near enough to him and thrusts her spear forward, but DK caught the spear and broke it in half, and then grabs the guard and uses her as a bludgeon to knock out the other guards before throwing her away.
Falco is facing a single guard. The guard swings her sword around and around to hit Falco, but he easily avoided all the hits by simply walking and moving around his body. Then Falco lifts up his feet and kicks the guard ‘weak spot’ before punching her straight in the face. More guards appear and surround him, but Falco remained calm and got out his laser pistol and performs a quick spin. After he spun, the guards all drop onto the floor and Falco blows the smoke off his gun. “You small fries are no match for me!” says Falco proudly.
Ganondorf watched the whole battle from his throne, and he is quite surprised that their ability to fight. After Pit took out his opponents, and walks toward to Ganondorf and challenges him. “I’ll take you down!”
“Your company sure knows how to fight,” says Ganondorf. “But you guys are still no match for me!” He got up and took out his sword and steps down to accept Pit’s challenge. “It’s too late to run, boy. You’re going to regret that there’s no turning back!”
“I’m not going to turn back!” Pit breaks his bow into two daggers and clash his weapons his Ganondorf’s sword. However, Pit’s strength is not so big and Ganondorf easily knocked him back several steps from a single sword clash.
Pit got onto his foot and dashes forward, once again clashing swords with Ganondorf. Though they both are locked together, Ganondorf is easily gaining the upper hand. After a while of pushing back and forth, Ganondorf knocks Pit back again and then raises his hand and creates an energy ball. “Behold my dark magic!” says Ganondorf, and he hurls the energy at Pit. Pit got up in time and avoided the energy ball.
“I won’t give up here!” shouts Pit determinedly. He swings his daggers around in a fury and dashes at Ganondorf again.
Ganondorf easily blocked the violent attacks by simply holding forward his sword. Pit stops attacking and flies to his sword to strike from there, but Ganondorf also blocked it. “You’re no good enough to face me, kid!” says Ganondorf. He swings his sword violently and knocks Pit backwards, leaving a medium-sized gash on his body.
“YA!”
Then Ganondorf hurls another energy ball and it hits Pit and consumes him in a bright explosion, leaving Pit burned up on the floor.
“Master!” gasps Fox.
“You’ll pay!” Falco says to Ganondorf angrily. He runs at Ganondorf and performs a flying kick, but Ganondorf stood to the side and easily avoided it, and he also bonks Falco in the head as he is passing by. Falco quickly gets up and throws several swift kicks at him, but Ganondorf easily blocked them all using his hands, and he also grabbed his leg and swings him around and around before throwing him away.
DK runs to Ganondorf and throws a punch forward, but Ganondorf easily stopped it with hand, and using his other hand, he smacks DK several times in the face before slamming him onto the ground. DK growls angrily and tries to grab his legs, but Ganondord jumps up and lands on top of the ape and stomps him hard, making the poor ape howl in pain.
Fox uses Fox Illusion to charge at Ganondorf very fast. Ganondord didn’t have time to avoid it, but he did manage to block the attack, and it only pushed him back a few steps. Fox then attacks with punches and kicks that are all useless the king of thieves.
“You all are too weak!” says Ganondorf, and he throws a violent punch into Fox’s face and sends him crashing backwards.
After taking them all out, Ganondorf turns his attention to Pit and sees him standing back up. “I will not lose to you here!” says Pit. “I promised my parents I will return safely!”
“You shouldn’t have made that promise in the first place,” says Ganondorf. “You know very well you have no chance of winning!”
Pit got back up and charges at Ganondorf again, but he is easily stopped in his track when Ganondorf grabbed him by the head. Ganondorf then pulls back his fist and it begins to glow, and then he throws forward the most powerful punch ever into Pit’s body. “Warlock Punch!”
The impact from the punch is so great that it released an energy that caused the whole place to tremble. Pit is sent shooting backwards in a burst of dark energy resulted from the punch and is smashes right through the wall and continues flying until he hits a big rock.
SMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH!!!!!!!!!!!!
“PIT!!!!!!!!!” gasp his companions. They angrily charge at Ganondorf and attack him all at once, but Ganondorf easily overcame them all by avoiding all their attacks at once and then hurling an energy ball at them.
BANG!
And the three of them are burned up in a pile. “Hahahahaha! You guys are too weak to fight me!” laughs Ganondorf evilly. “You guys aren’t enough to satisfy me!” Then he stopped laughing, for he felt a presence behind him. He turns around and is shocked to see Pit still standing! “Still alive?!”
Though severely beaten and bleeding badly, Pit is standing up like he’s never been hit. He remembers what his foster mother told him about the food giving people strength, so he reaches his hand to the bag and ate the whole content instantly, and then he reaches for his bow and arrow.
“I’m going to kill you this time!” says Ganondorf! He runs towards him at a fast speed and throws a punch forward, but to his surprise, Pit moved out at a fast speed! “What?!”
Pit appears behind him and kicks him in the back of the head hard, knocking him onto the rock. Ganondorf quickly turns around, only to get hit several times in the face. “Why are?!” He throws another punch at Pit, but misses again.
Pit flies back several steps and then places an arrow on the bow and pulls it back as far as he can. When pulled, the arrow begins to emit a bright and blinding light. “Father said this arrow contains mysterious powers great for fighting evil,” he thought.
“You have made me really angry!” growls Ganondorf. “I’m going to kill you!” He charges up an energy ball and hurls it forward.
This is when Pit lets go the arrow and it shoots forward like a ball of light. The arrow hits and pierces through the energy ball and continues heading for Ganondorf. Ganondorf is too late to avoid the light arrow, and it hits him in the body and engulfs him in a bright light.
“GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!”
Then an explosion occurs and Ganondorf is blasted high into the sky where he disappears over the horizon.
Pit drops onto his knees and sighs. “At last… I won…”
And so, Pit and his companions recovered the stolen things and returned to their country. Everyone is happy at their heroic accomplishment and they have become the most famous heroes of the country.
And thus, the country is at peace…
Long, long ago, in a faraway land called Unnamed Land, there is a castle where King Master Hand and his wife (played by a female wireframe) live. They live happily ever after.
The end…(Ran Out of Money, Couldn't End the Show there)
So anyway, the queen gave birth to a daughter which they named Samus, even though it doesn’t exactly sound like a girl’s name.
To honor the birth of the princess, they invited the king of a neighboring country called Neighboring Land to come over to have a party. And so, the king Mario came, bringing along his baby Marth.
Besides inviting the King Mario over, Master Hand also invited some fairies and the three most important guests, the Fairy Godmothers. Three of the fairies, Aeris, Tifa, and Yuffie (imagine them to be small in size and with wings) arrived first, but the fairy godmothers are obviously late.
But anyway, they began the party. Mario walks over to baby Samus’s cradle and plays with her for a while. “What a cute little girl! I hope-a she will go well with my son Marth in the future!”
“I sure hope so!” says MH. “I can’t wait to see what kind of beauty my daughter will grow into in the future!”
“I also can’t-a wait to see what kind of handsome man my son will grow into in da future!”
The three fairies fly over to Master Hand and say to him, “If it is okay, o king, that we offer our presents to your daughter.” MH happily accepts there kindness, and so the fairies offer there magical gifts to the baby.
The first fairy, Aeris, flies above the baby and sprinkles flower petals onto her while saying, “May you grow to become a beautiful woman in the future and also find a handsome husband.”
“That’s just what I wanted her to have!” says MH delightfully. “You have given a good present!”
The second fairy, Tifa blows a kiss towards the baby and says, “May you grow up to become a good barten… I mean cook…”
“I’ll be waiting to eat her cuisine when that day comes!” says MH.
The third fairy, Yuffie, flies in circles above the baby and sprinkles glittering powder. “May you grow up to become a strong, hyper, and athletic woman!”
“That wasn’t necessary…” Aeris tells her.
“Why not? Every woman should know how to protect herself!”
Suddenly, the baby reaches up her hand and grabs Yuffie, and then shakes her around while laughing happily, and then hurls her across the room and she splats into the wall.
SPLAT!
“Ow…”
“Well, she sure is becoming a strong girl!” says MH.
Suddenly, a strange presence fills the room and magical dust begins to gather in one spot, and then a bright flash occurs and when it died down, three people can be seen standing in where the flash was.
“It’s the Fairy Godmothers!” said the people.
“And they’re late!” grumbles MH.
And they are! The Fairy Godmothers: Peach, Zelda, and Crazy Godmother, who is in fact Crazy Hand cleverly disguised as a fairy godmother.
“We are sorry, your majesty,” says Zelda. “Crazy Godmother took too long to dress up, so we were a bit late.”
“No problem,” says MH. “As long as you can make it here, that’s good enough!”
“Now let us offer our splendid gifts to your newborn child!”
Peach goes over to the baby and touches her face playfully. “She’s so cute! My gift for her is that she will become a beautiful…”
Aeris flies next to her and says, “But that was my gift for her already!”
“Oh really? Then I have another one for her. She will have a beautiful voice that will attract people! Her songs will be so sweet that anyone who hears it will be soothed!”
“That’s a good one!” says MH.
Crazy Godmother goes to baby and says, “Aw… Look at that little cutie! Such a cute little girl will surely come across perverts who will try to get some of her, so therefore I will give her the gift of being very strong and able…”
Yuffie, a bit injured and limp, quickly flies to him and says, “That was my gift to her, and boy… Was it a painful one…”
“Oh really? If that’s the case, then I will give her the gift of being a nice and kind woman even though she is very strong. But of course, she should be able to protect herself when the time comes.”
Finally, the last godmother Zelda goes to the baby, and was about to say her wish when suddenly the sound of thunder is heard. Everyone sees dark cloud appearing in the room, and it gathers in one place and slowly, Mewtwo appears out of it!
“It’s the Fairy Godfather!” gasps everyone.
“Why is it that nobody invited me?” asks Mewtwo angrily.
“Because you’re neither a fairy nor a godmother,” says MH.
“Is that the only reason? That sounds just like discrimination! You do not know my fury until you saw it!” shouts Mewtwo angrily. His voice is so powerful that the whole room shook violently and everyone cowered into the corner. “As a punishment for not inviting me earlier, I will offer the baby a gift, or rather, a curse!”
“GASP!!!!!!!” gasps everyone.
“On the princess’s 18th birthday, she shall touch a ball and then drop dead!”
“GASP!!!!!!!” gasps everyone.
“EEEEEEEEEEEYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!” shrieks Crazy Godmother like a little girl.
“How dare you curse my daughter!” growls MH angrily. He sends his guards to get Mewtwo, but the fairy godfather disappeared before they could get him. “Oh no… My daughter… Does she have no future now?”
Zelda goes over to the king and comforts him. “Don’t worry, king. I will do something about this.” Then she goes over to the baby. “I’m afraid my powers are not enough to prevent the curse from happening, but I can lighten it up a bit. When the day comes that she touches a ball, your daughter will merely fall into an eternal sleep, only to wake up from the kiss of a true love.” And she chants some magical words and sprinkles glittering dust onto her.
“Thank you a lot, fairy godmother,” says MH.
“Don’t worry, king! We will protect your daughter all we can!” Tifa says to him.
“Count me in too!” says Yuffie. “Ow! My back still hurts!”
Still, the king is worried about this, so he made sure that Samus stayed away from balls of all kinds.
-
As time went by, Samus grew to become an adorable girl. Since Unnamed Land and Neighboring Land are so near each other, Marth would sometimes come over to play or Samus would go there. They are really good friends meant for each other, just read below:
When they were 5, Marth would throw rocks at Samus until she bleeds, and then Samus would proceed to stone Marth with the largest rock she could find.
When they were 10, they would gather gangs and then beat up each other violently to the point where someone is crippled greatly.
When they were 12, Marth would use his sword skills to hit Samus with a stick, but Samus would fight back using karate and beat the snot out of Marth, though not before getting bruises on herself.
When they were 15, they would get into violent near-death fights. They shout at each other, strangle each other, beat up each other using dangerous stuffs, and do even more dangerous stuff.
As you can see, they really are good friends, right?
-
Soon, the time came on Samus’s 18th birthday…
Samus is walking through the streets having her own time while the three fairies fly behind her to keep an eye on her. “Make sure Samus doesn’t come in contact with any balls,” says Aeris.
“Right, or else she’ll fall asleep until her man of her dreams comes kiss her,” says Tifa in a rather sweet voice. “Aye… I wish I have a boyfriend some times…”
There happens to be some kids playing soccer in a nearby field. One of the kids (played by Young Link) kicked the ball out the field and it flew towards Samus! The ball is coming from behind her back, so she didn’t notice.
“Oh no!” gasps Yuffie, and she quickly gets in between the two. Then Samus spots something on the ground and so ducks down to get it, and the soccer ball smacks into Yuffie and they both fly over Samus and crashes into a tree.
“I thought it was a coin,” says Samus, looking at the thing that she picked up. “But it was just a bottle cap.”
Aeris lets out a sigh of relief. “That was close…”
They continue moving until they come near a baseball field. One of the kids (played by Ness) swings at the ball and it flies in the direction of Samus! Tifa quickly flies in front of the ball and throw a punch at it, and the ball explodes into pieces. “That was close…” she says.
“The ball just blew up!” gasp the kids.
Aeris flies in front of Samus and says to her, “I think you should return to the castle. Your birthday party might be starting soon! You’re the star, so you shouldn’t be late!”
“You have a point. All right; I’ll return to the castle,” says Samus, and she runs towards the direction of the castle.
“That should keep her safe…”
As Samus is running, she accidentally trips on the cobblestone pavement and falls onto the ground.
BANG!
“Ow! Curse these cobblestones!” And she tries to hold onto something to get up.
Unknown to her, there happens to be a bull in front of her and the bull has its back towards her. When Samus got up, she reached under the bull’s legs and grabbed his ‘balls’, and the moment she did, Samus drops face first onto the ground and stops moving.
The three fairies fly into the scene and gasp at what they saw. “Oh no! We’re too late!”
The bull lets out a moo and takes a dump, and the smelly brown stuff falls on top of Samus’s head. Eew…
At this moment, a dark cloud gathers in the sky and Mewtwo appears out of it. “Hahaha! What did I tell you? The princess will surely drop dead on this day from touching a ball! But that accursed fairy godmother made it so that she will fall asleep instead. If that’s the case, I will kill the man of her dreams to ensure that she will never wake up again!” And then he disappears.
“Oh no! What do we do?” asks Yuffie. “If the king learns about this…”
“We have no choice but to tell him…” says Tifa.
-
The news reached the king very fast, and he is obviously not pleased to hear this. “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!! CURSE THAT MEWTWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” screams MH at the top of his voice. He goes rampage around the castle and crashes around the walls, making the whole place shake violently.
“Please calm down, your majesty!” his advisors told him.
“HE’LL PAY FOR EVERYTHING!!!!!! SUMMON THE GUARDS!!!!!! WE’RE GOING AFTER HIM!!!!!”
Meanwhile, the fairy godmothers are watching the whole scene from the window. “This is bad,” says Peach. “There is no way the king can triumph against Mewtwo like this.”
“We have to stop the king!” says CG.
“We have no choice but to do this…” says Zelda. “C’mon, we will cast a spell that will put the whole country to sleep so that they will not be struck by this news. The only way for them to wake up is when Samus herself wakes up first. This is the best we can do for now.”
So the three fairy godmothers fly up into the air above the country and cast a magic spell that covers the entire place. One by one, the citizens of Unnamed Land drift to sleep in the middle of whatever they’re doing, and Master Hand himself fell asleep too.
“That’s done,” says Zelda. “Now we will go to Neighboring Land and tell Prince Marth about this.”
“I knew those two were meant for each other!” says CG.
“Actually… I made a mistake when I tried to change the curse a little bit…” says Zelda strangely.
-
The fairy godmothers told the news to King Mario, and he is struck by it. “Mamamia! I can’t-a believe theez happened!” he gasps. “Quick-a! Sent-a my son Marth to awaken Samus! Surely he eez da true love of her! Only he can wake-a her up!”
“Thank you so much, your majesty,” says Zelda.
Marth is summoned here and is told everything. “Why should I kiss that wench?” he asks.
“Deez eez for da good of da world!” Mario tells him. “You must-a do eet even if you don’t-a want-a too!”
“Fine! But I’m not doing it because I love her, but because I don’t like what Mewtwo is doing and I’m going to teach him a lesson!”
Suddenly, a guard (played by a male wireframe) runs into the room and speaks to the king in a language only he can understand. “What-a?!” gasps Mario. He runs to the window and looks through a telescope. “Mamamia!”
“What’s wrong?” asks Peach.
“A barria has appeared over Unnamed Land!”
Indeed, a barrier made of dark energy has appeared over the country, blocking it from outside force. “It must be Mewtwo!” says Zelda. “He is trying to stop our plans from going smoothly. However, he did not know that our holy powers are able to pierce through his dark barrier. We can still make the way in!”
“Hurry up, Marth!” CG says to the prince. “We’re counting on you!”
“Okay,” says Marth. And so, Marth the fairy godmothers head off towards Unnamed Land.
-
The godmothers and Marth are now in front of the dark barrier protecting the city. “How do we enter into there?” asks Marth.
“I’ll handle this,” says Zelda. She cups her hand in front of her and gathers holy energy into her palms, and after she’s done charging, she shoots out a blast of beam that hits the barrier really hard and tears a hole right through it. “There!”
“That move looks clichéd…”
Nevertheless, they step into the town, which is the same as before, except everyone has fallen asleep in the middle of what they’re doing, be it playing, working, eating, or driving.
“We put everyone in this town to sleep for they will not cause panic,” explains Peach.
“I don’t care; let’s just find the princess and get it over,” says Marth.
“You don’t have to be in a rush, do you?”
As they walk in the direction of the castle, several black creatures emerge from the ground and surround them. “Darkling! They are evil beings created by Mewtwo and can only be smite down by the power of light!” gasps Zelda. “Leave them to us! You head onto the castle yourself!”
One of the Darkling jumps towards Marth to attack him, but CG quickly slaps it away. “Go, Marth!” says CG. “We’ll cover you!”
“Take care of yourself too!” says Marth, quickly making his way through the Darkling and towards the castle in the distance.
Some of the Darkling turn towards Marth and begin to follow him, but Peach swings her magic wand against the air and shot out several glowing hearts that immediately eradicated the Darkling.
-
Marth made it to the castle by himself safely. He slashes the castle gate using his sword and easily cut out a large hole on it so that he can enter. The sight inside the castle is the same as the town; everyone is asleep in the middle of whatever they’re done. The guards are either sitting down or standing in their positions while asleep. The maids were in the middle of the cleaning of the house when they fell asleep.
Marth made his way into the throne room, where he sees Mewtwo sitting on the throne. “So you’re here, prince,” says Mewtwo.
“I’m going to put an end to you, Mewtwo!” says Marth while pointing the tip of his sword at him. “Prepare yourself!”
“I will not let you mess with my business! The princess and her kingdom shall sleep until they rot! You will die here!”
“You’re the one who’s going to die yourself!” Marth charges forward and attempt to stab Mewtwo with his sword, but the fairy godfather teleported to the other side of the room behind him. Marth turns around in time to see Mewtwo charging up energy balls and hurling them at him, so he quickly rolls to the side to avoid them.
Mewtwo continues to hurl energy balls, and Marth keeps on running back and forth around the room to avoid them. When he got the chance, he runs towards Mewtwo and swings his sword, but Mewtwo once again teleports to safety.
Mewtwo appears in the air above Marth and then fires a laser beam from his hand. Marth quickly brings up his sword and let the beam bounce off the shiny surface of his sword, and then he jumps up to Mewtwo and slashes, but once again missing.
Mewtwo appears on the far side of the room and says, “You have great skills, but physical power cannot beat my magic!” He lifts up his hands and electricity gathers in his palms, and then he fires a huge blast of thunderbolt in Marth direction.
Marth tries to get away by jumping to the side, but the speed of the electricity is too fast and he got zapped. “YAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!” Then magically, the electric pulls Marth up into the air and swing him around for a while before hurling him back onto the floor.
“Haha! What did I tell you?”
Marth got back up and says, “It’s not over yet!”
“Then take it again!” Mewtwo once again fires the thunderbolt. Marth holds up his sword and the metallic surface absorbs the electric into it and protected him. Luckily the handle of the sword isn’t metal, or else…
As the sword is absorbing the electric, Marth runs towards Mewtwo while shouting a war cry, much to the godfather’s surprise. When near enough, Marth swings his sword and it amazingly shot forward a ball of electricity! The attack came unexpectedly and Mewtwo was shot before he teleported away.
“Ugh! You sure caught me with that!” growls Mewtwo. “But the game ends here!” He stretches out his hand and a spoon forms magically out of thin air and right in his hand.
The two dash at each other and clash weapons, and begin a furious close range combat. Being a master in swordsmanship Marth easily gain the upper hand on Mewtwo by knocking him backwards with each strong blow. “This kid is strong with the sword!” thought Mewtwo. “I must change battle plans!” He quickly teleports away again just before Marth unleashed a stronger than usual slash.
“Is that all you can do? Teleporting around like a coward?” asks Marth.
Suddenly, the whole place begins shaking violently, and the entire ceiling gets ripped away by Mewtwo! “You shall face my true terror!” growls Mewtwo loudly. “Psychic Meteor!” He lifts up his hands and a large ball of energy appears above him and begins to grow.
“I don’t care what you’re going to use! I’ll beat you for sure!”
When the energy ball is large enough, Mewtwo hurls it high into the air, where it explodes and then several small energy shots rain back down like meteorites. Marth pulls his cape in front of his face in hope of protecting himself, but the energy shots ripped through his cape and hits his body and burn him severely. “GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!”
-
Back in town, the godmothers just finished off the last of the Darkling. “We must get to the castle quick!” says Zelda. “Marth needs our help fighting Mewtwo.” So the three of them wasted no time in flying to the castle.
When they got near, they saw Mewtwo floating above the castle and shooting down energy shoots at it. “Mewtwo is up there!” says Peach, so they three quickly fly up there.
“Mewtwo! Give up at once!”
“You will all die!” shouts Mewtwo in anger. He turns to them and fire several energy shots, but Zelda created a crystal-like shield and it easily blocked the shots. Meanwhile, Peach and CG fly down to attend Marth.
“Are you all right?” Peach asks him.
“I’m all right,” says Marth with burns all over his body. “I’m going to teach that villain a lesson!”
“You can’t fight him without any special powers,” says CG. “You need our holy powers!”
Suddenly, Zelda gets blasted by Mewtwo’s shot and falls onto the floor next to them. “Ah!”
“Zelda!” gasp the other two godmothers.
“I’m all right,” says Zelda. “We must lend Marth our strength so that he can defeat Mewtwo! C’mon! Let us transfer some of our holy powers into Marth’s sword!”
“Okay!”
“I will not let you do whatever you want!” shouts Mewtwo as he continues to bombard them with shots, and the four at the bottom quickly got out of the way.
“Argh! This won’t do any good!” says Marth. “I’ll show him!” He bravely runs forward and uses his sword to knock away any incoming energy shots.
“We can still transfer the power to him even like this,” says Zelda. “Now!” So the godmothers point their wands at Marth and shot out a cloud of glittering dust. The dust surrounds Marth and then gathers around his sword, and his sword begins to glow brightly.
Marth takes another swing at his sword, and this time it shot out a large sword-shaped energy beam. The beam easily sliced through the shots fire by Mewtwo and heads towards him.
“What?!” gasps Mewtwo, and he quickly teleports out of the way. He reappears in a nearby place and says angrily, “I’m going to kill you all for this!” He pulls back his fist and energy surrounds it, and he flies towards Marth at high speed. “Psychic Punch!” But Marth easily avoided it by stepping to the side, and Mewtwo’s fist hits the floor instead. “Oh no! I missed!”
“Too bad for you,” says Marth, and then he proceeds to slash Mewtwo rapidly, not giving him a chance to fight back.
SLASH! SLASH! SLASH! SLASH!
“AAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH!!!!!!!”
Finally, Marth performs a Shield Breaker move, in which in performs a powerful downward strike; because of the holy powers infused in his sword, it released a huge blast of light that engulfed the whole room.
SLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The light is so bright that even the godmothers had to cover their eye. Mewtwo is severely hit by the move, and slowly, he disintegrates within the holy light.
Finally, the light died down and the evil fairy godfather is nowhere to be seen. “You did it!” exclaims CG.
“Quick! We must go to the princess!” says Zelda.
They quickly into the next room where they see Samus lying on a bed, and lying on her blanket are those three fairies. “So that’s where those three went,” says Peach. “I was wondering where they were.”
“So I have to kiss this wench and everything’s over?” asks Marth. “Is there another solution to this?”
“Actually…” says Zelda uncomfortably. “I used the wrong spell when I tried to lighten the curse…”
“What’s wrong?”
“To break the spell, the princess must be slapped across the face by her worst friend… Seeing how you always fought with her, you are without doubt her worst friend…”
“Ah, I see… I’m gonna enjoy this!” says Marth with a mischievous smile. He walks over to the sleeping Samus and looks down at her lovely face, and then he lifts up his hand and…
SLAP!!!!!!
To make a long story short, Samus woke up in an instant, and so did everyone else in the country. And so, everyone is happy that the curse is broken, and they lived happily ever after, and Samus and Marth continue to live their same life.
In some town I’m not going to bother mentioning, because in almost every tales, they never mention the town name. So anyway, in the town lived a happy but poor family. The father, Crazy Father, who is in fact Crazy Hand not disguised as a woman for once, is a hopeless loafer who got kicked out of his job, and spends the rest of his day acting like a bum.
The mother, Zelda, is a very hard working woman trying her best to keep the family alive. They also have a son named Ness, and he is also a hard working boy.
Life is not easy for the family, because Zelda is a woman and at that time, women aren’t suitable for most jobs, and their father is totally useless… In hope of looking for a job, Zelda searched many places to look for one, until…
Dear Zelda, We have heard about your family problem and how you really want to look for a job to support your family. If you don’t mind, you can come to my place and work as a maid. I will take care of you and give you enough salary to support the family. The location is The Town, The Country.
From Master Hand
-
And so…
“Mom? Do you really have to go?” Ness asks her mother.
“I’m sorry, son,” replies Zelda. “I have no choice, as this is the only hope left to support our family. Don’t worry; I will keep in contact with you no matter what. Take good care of yourself and your useless father.”
“I will, mother.”
“You can count on me to take of Ness!” says Crazy Father.
At last, the ship is departing for The Country, so Zelda quickly boarded onto it. As the ship departs into the sea, Ness runs along the harbor waving good-bye to his mother again. “Mom! Don’t forget to write back letters!”
“I will, son!” shouts Zelda. “And watch out!”
And Ness reached the end of the harbor and accidentally falls into the water.
SPLASH
-
A few days after Zelda left, a letter arrived at their home.
Dear son and husband,
How are you two doing? I have reached the rich man’s house and am working very well. The master is a very kind man and he treated me very well. Life is very good here! Still, I hope to come back to you as soon as possible!
From your mother, Zelda
“Good to hear that she’s all right,” says CF while reading the letter and drinking beer.
And so, letters came to their house every few days. Ness is very happy to be in contact with his mother.
But on that certain day…
“Dad, it’s been a whole month already and there’s been no letters coming!” says Ness.
“Sending letters isn’t easy, son,” CF tells him. “The mailman has to go through several dangers to get the job done.”
“But no matter what danger there is, the letter would always arrive within a week!”
“Who cares?”
The days went on again, and no letter has arrived. Ness would love to send a letter there, but he doesn’t know Master Hand’s home address…
Soon, the lack of letters is bothering him greatly, so he came to a decision.
“What? You’re going to The Country to find mom?” asks CF in surprise. “Are you for real?”
“I’m for real, dad!” says Ness determinedly. “Something must have happened to mom! I must go see her no matter what!”
“You have made a brave decision, son. But we do not have enough money to buy ourselves a ticket to go there! We only have enough for one person!”
“In that case, I’ll go alone! Please, dad! I really want to see mother!”
After much convincing from Ness, Crazy Father finally decides to let Ness go find Zelda alone. So he bought him a ship ticket and gave him some money to take along, and so, Ness packed his stuffs and set off for the long journey.
-
“Take care, son!” shouts CF from the harbor.
“I will, dad! I will find mother and we will come back home together!” shouts Ness from the departing ship.
And so, the journey to search for the mother has begun…
-
That night, Ness is sitting on his bunk in the sleeping room. Since this ship ride is rather cheap, the sleeping rooms are rather small. Ness is sitting on his bed while drinking tomato juice. “I hope mother is all right,” he thought. He looks out the window to if there’s any sight worth watching, but since it’s pitch black out there and has no lights, he couldn’t see anything. “Aye… I’m bored… I wish something would happen…”
Then the ship begins rocking back and forth due to rough waves, and Ness slides around on his bed and accidentally spills some tomato juice onto his shirt.
“Whoa! This is bad! I got to clean this up!” So he got tissue papers and quickly cleans up the wet spot. Soon, he is done, but the juice’s color had already dyed onto his shirt, but he simply shrugged it off. “Boy, I feel tired… I think I’ll sleep now.” So he dropped his head onto the pillow and immediately went to sleep.
About an hour later, the ship rocked around again and Ness is tossed out of his bed and onto the floor, and he didn’t even wake up. The rolls around on the floor and towards the door that leads outside (he forgot to close it), and stops at the deck.
Then some hobo (played by Reed) steps out from his room to go to the toilet. “Toilet…” he mumbles slowly. Then he sees Ness lying on the floor and also the red spot on his shirt, and he begins to tremble with fright. “Blood… Someone died… HELP!!!!!!! MURDER!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!”
And everyone on the ship is awakened.
“What happened?!”
“Fire?!”
“What the?!”
“YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!”
“Have we struck an iceberg?!”
“Godzilla?!”
-
The next day, the ship finally reached The Country. Everyone steps down from the ship, and every single one of them has really tired and sleepy faces. “Is everyone all right…?” asks the harbor guard.
-
Ness wasted no time in making his way to The Town, and since it’s very near the harbor, he got there in a about an hour. In that place, he asked around her directions to Master Hand’s house until he is lead to a large mansion.
“Mother is in there!” he thought excitedly. “At last! I’m going to find her!” He marches up to the door and knocks it, and the owner of the house, Wario, steps out.
“What is it, kid?” asks Wario.
“Excuse sir, is this the house of Master Hand?” asks Ness.
“Sorry, kid, but he moved already.”
Ness is shocked to hear this. “What?!”
“He moved out about a month ago to a better place. This town is getting worse by the minute.”
Ness drops onto his knees and begins to cry. “No… I went through all the trouble to come here, but…”
“What’s wrong, kid? You want to see Master Hand so much? I can tell you where he moved to if you want to.”
“Thanks, mister!”
So Wario gave him the address of Master Hand’s new home, and so Ness once again set off to find his mother.
“Let’s see… The new place is Another Town, also in this country… It seems very far from here.”
Nevertheless, Ness made his way out of The Town and into a forest. Luckily, it’s not an uncharted forest, but a well known hiking place, so there are lots of hikers and tourists around here.
The place is also very beautiful, so Ness took his time to marvel at the wonders of the nature here. “Wow! I have seen such beautiful trees and flowers!” he exclaims. Because he is too busy sightseeing, he bumps into Cranky Kong.
“Watch where you’re going, ya brat!” shouts CK. “Don’t you have eyes or are you blind, ya brat!”
“I’m so sorry, mister…”
After some lecturing from the cranky old ape, Ness continues moving through the forest until it’s evening. Luckily, there is a traveler’s lodge built in the middle of the forest for hikers, so Ness goes into it.
Ness went inside and asks the front desk for a room, and the person at the front desk (played by the landlady of 10 Lives Apartment) replies, “We’re in shortage of rooms, so you’ll have to share with some other people.”
“That’s all right,” says Ness. “I’m happy as long as I have a room.”
“Then follow me.” So the landlady led him through the hallway and towards the room.
While they are on the way, Ness notices that most of the hikers here are young women. “Wow! This place sure is popular with girls!” he thought. “What if I have to share a room with several girls?” His mind begins to wander as he imagines the landlady telling him that he has to share a room with several other beautiful women. “Hehe! How nice would that be!” He begins to drool at the thought of this.
But in reality…
“You’ll have to share a room with these people,” says the landlady.
Ness looks into the room and sees that the roommates aren’t the nicest kinds of people you would expect: Cranky Kong (the same guy who lectured him), some clown named Buggy, Mr. 1, Dr. Eggman, K. Rool, and K. Omplain.
“Uh… Thanks…” says Ness, not wanting to sound disappointed.
-
That evening, dinner is being served at the lodge’s café. Ness got his meal and sees an empty spot at a table with several girls, so he decides to go over and sit there. But when he got near, some fat female dragon (played by Ms. Lump) comes over and bumps him away and took the place, so Ness had no choice but to sit with his roommates on the same table. They really don’t look like the nicest of the bunch.
-
That night, the lodge has closed down and everyone is asleep. Ness woke up in the middle of the night and wants to go to toilet. “It’s so dark…” he mumbles. He reaches into his bag and got out a flashlight to help him light the way. He shines around the room to find a way to the door and careful not to wake up any of the people in this room. They’re not the kind of people you want to wake up.
As Ness carefully tiptoes through the room, Eggman turns around in his sleep and his hands hit Ness in the leg, causing him to fall over and land on top of the fat scientist, who immediately gets up and Ness is sent falling backwards and lands on top of Buggy. Soon, everyone in the room is awake, but Ness quickly zipped under his blanket and pretended that nothing happened.
“Who stepped on me?!” shouts Eggman.
“Who’s trying to kill me?!” shouts Buggy.
“Would you guys shut up?!” shouts K. Rool.
“Who wants to die?” asks Mr. 1 coldly.
“I hate these kinds of lodge! They are the worst! People always kick around and drive me insane!” complains K. Omplain, and he proceeds on to give pointless ranting and grumbling.
“Nobody disturbs my beauty sleep!” shouts Cranky. Fortunately, none of them knew that it’s Ness who started this.
After everyone has settled down again, Ness slowly got back up and got his flashlight, and this time successfully made it out the room. “I have to use the toilet no matter what…” he says to himself.
Suddenly, a door opens and Ms. Lump walks out, and not being human and the fact that her face looks quite scary half-asleep, Ness lets out a shriek. “GHOST!!!!!!!!!”
Immediately, Ms. Lumps jumps awake and shouts, “WHERE?! GHOST!!!!!! HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
And everyone got frightened up from sleep.
“Fire?!”
“Ghost?!”
“What?!”
“Thief?!”
“Argh! These kinds of lodges are the worst!”
“Who wants to die?”
“Can’t you youngsters keep your mouth shut and let old grandpa have a sleep?!”
“YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!”
-
The next morning, everyone had breakfast and left the lodge, and they all have tired and sleepy faces as if they didn’t sleep last night.
“What a night…” mumbles Ness. “I have to get on the road to find mom again…” So he continues to journey to look for mother.
He walks through the forest path, asking directions from passersby and relying on road signs. Eventually, he came to Another Town. “At last…” he says. “I can find mother here…”
He begins asking around the place for Master Hand’s house, and he learned a shocking revelation. “What?! Master Hand moved again?!” he gasps.
“Yeah, he didn’t like this place very much, so he moved,” explains the current owner of Master Hand’s former house, Mr. Game & Watch. “I think he moved to Yet Another Town.”
“Oh… This is bothersome…”
“That place is really far from here. It takes at least 5 days to get there from here.”
“Thanks for telling me… I have to move out…” And so, Ness begins to leave, but G&W stopped him.
“Wait, kid! How about I hire some people to give you a lift there?”
“Why thanks! That would be great!”
So G&W hired a driver named Captain Falcon. “C’mon, kid! Hop aboard!” CF says to Ness. “I’ll take you to Yet Another Town in a jiffy!”
“Thanks, mister!”
So they board onto CF’s expensive car found nowhere else in the world and zoomed off at an unimaginable speed.
The ride went smoothly and it seems that Ness will reach Yet Another Town very soon. When night came, CF stopped his car at a small inn for a break. “It’s not safe to drive at night, so we’ll rest here,” says CF. “Go rest at that inn; I’ll take you again tomorrow morning.”
“Thanks!” says Ness, and he heads to the inn. Inside, he asks for a room, but the innkeeper (played by Susanna Luvly) told him that all the rooms are full, so he may have to share a room with other people. “Um… That’s okay…” Ness begins to worry that the room will be filled with not so nice people again, like at the forest lodge.
So the innkeeper lead him to his room, and to Ness’s surprise, it’s full of girls in there! (Tifa, Yuffie, Ms. Valentine, Tayuya; to name a few)
“Wow! Thanks! I like this room!” says Ness excitedly. So he spent a happy night with the girls.
Okay, the night isn’t so happy. The girls are the wild type, and they spent the whole night drinking and getting drunk, and so acting very wild and doing crazy stuff. Poor Ness had to suffer the whole night in the corner of the room trying to sleep, enduring the laughing, screaming, catfights, and beer bottle hurling. He preferred the night at the lodge with those evil-looking men.
-
The next morning, Ness had his breakfast and went outside to find Captain Falcon, but to his surprise, he did not see the car! “Where’d he go?” Then he notices a notice taped on a nearby electric pole.
I hate to tell you this, kid. But I had to rush back home because my grandma is very sick. You’re on your own, kid.
From Douglas J. Falcon
“This sucks…” grumbles Ness, but he had no choice but to walk along the only road towards Yet Another Town.
-
The trip is not easy, as there are no stores or resting places along this really long and seemingly endless road. Sometimes he would take a break or he would try to call for cars to pick him up. He managed to pick up a truck ride, but then the truck driver (played by Samurai Goroh) took his money and kicked him out, so Ness was left without any money, and his supplies are running low.
Still, he managed to stay up and tried his best to keep moving, despite the hardships he had to face. Now isn’t this so touching?
-
After 5 days of tireless walking, Ness finally reached Yet Another Town, and he is wearing ragged clothes and is really skinny and beaten up. “Mom… Where are you…?”
Then some kind passersby saw him and immediately took him under their care. When Ness recovered, he told them the reason he is here, and the people are touched by his story. Wasting no time, the people tracked down Master Hand’s house and they finally found it, and Ness is sent over there.
At long last…
“MOM!!!!!!!!!!!” shouts Ness with joy as he jumps into Zelda’s arms, who is lying sickly in bed.
“My son! I never thought you would come find me!” says Zelda happily.
The others watch from the side happily and not to mention with tears. “How touching… The boy went a long way to find his mother,” says MH. “I’ve never heard a more touching tale than this…”
As it turned out, Zelda got sick during her work, so she couldn’t write letters. MH, worried about her health, kept on moving to new places to live in, hoping Zelda will recover.
To make a long story short, Crazy Father is called over to this place, and the whole family lived happily ever after in Yet Another Town.
