Episode 426b: Bubblestand

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SpongeBob: Ah, what a wonderful day. The sun is out, the water is shimmering, scallops are chirping. So peaceful.

SpongeBob grabs wood, hammer, and nails, then starts building a bubblestand.

Squidward: Can we lower the volume, please? I can't work with all that racket going on!

SpongeBob: Oh, sure thing, Squidward.

Squidward: Ha, yeah right.

SpongeBob: Okay.

SpongeBob taps on the nail lightly, then looks up at Squidward's window, and repeats this 5 times.

Squidward: And now, some soothing sounds from Squidward's clarinet. Thank you, thank you.

Squidward starts to play. SpongeBob looks up and sees that Squidward is playing his clarinet, so he decides to finish building the stand quickly. Squidward looks out at SpongeBob.

Squidward: I thought I... wha?

SpongeBob: Hey Squidward! Wanna blow some bubbles? Only 25 cents.

Squidward: Oh, right. Like I would spend a moment of my time blowing bubbles.

SpongeBob: Uh huh!

Squidward: Oh please! I mean, who in the world would pay to blow bubbles ?

Timmy appears near Squidward’s house.

Timmy: Hey, Squidward.

Squidward: Oh, boy.

Timmy walks over to SpongeBob.

SpongeBob: Good morning, Timmy. Would you like to blow a bubble?

Timmy: Hmmm, how much is it?

SpongeBob: Only a quarter.

Timmy: Sounds reasonable. (checks his pockets) Um, I'm going to need to borrow a quarter.

SpongeBob: Sure thing, Tim.

SpongeBob pulls out a quarter and gives it to Timmy.

Timmy: Ah, one quarter.

Timmy hands SpongeBob the quarter. SpongeBob bites it to see if it's real, and it bends.

SpongeBob: Thank you.

Squidward: Ha, business is booming. How did I ever get surrounded by such losers? Heh.

SpongeBob: One bubble wand, dipped and ready to go.

Timmy grabs the wand from SpongeBob, inhales deeply and begins to blow, but nothing happens. After a while, SpongeBob puts up a lessons sign.

SpongeBob: Could I interest you in some lessons? Only 25 cents.

Timmy: Uh, very well then. Hey, Sponge, can I borrow another quarter ?

SpongeBob hands Timmy a quarter.

Timmy: Thanks.

SpongeBob: Okay, Timmy, it's all in the technique! First go like this (lifts his left leg), spin around. Stop! Double take three times. One ! Two ! Three ! Then pelvic thrust. Whooooooo, whooooooo. Stop on your right foot, don't forget it! Now it's time to bring it around town. Bring-it-a-round-town. Then you do this, then this, and this, then this, then that, then this and that, and then...

SpongeBob blows three bubbles: one big duck and two small ducks.

Timmy: Oooooh.

SpongeBob pops out of nowhere and blows a box. Timmy giggles as SpongeBob blows a caterpillar.

Timmy: Ahahaha.

SpongeBob blows a boat bubble. It floats off, then pops and makes a foghorn noise.

Squidward: Huh ?

Squidward looks at his clarinet.

SpongeBob: And now... with two hands!

SpongeBob inhales deeply, and blows an elephant bubble while circus music starts playing. Timmy starts laughing.

Timmy: It's an elephant !

Timmy stops laughing as the elephant floats into Squidward's house and explodes. Squidward angrily walks outside and goes toward the bubblestand. SpongeBob and Timmy hide. SpongeBob leaves a closed sign.

SpongeBob: Excuse me sir, but we are clo...

Squidward: Don't give me any of that! How can you two possibly make all this noise just blowing bubbles?

SpongeBob: We're not just blowing bubbles, we're making bubble art! Watch carefully. First go like this (lifts his left leg), spin around. Stop! Double take three times. One ! Two ! Three ! Then pelvic thrust. Whooooooo, whooooooo. Stop on your right foot, don't forget it! Now it's time to bring it around town. Bring-it-a-round-town. Then you do this, then this, and this, then this, then that, then this and that, and then...

SpongeBob blows a butterfly which flies over to Squidward, lands on his head, and finally pops.

Squidward: That's not art! That's just ANNOYING blowing bubbles, that's the lamest idea I have ever heard!

SpongeBob and Timmy put their head down as they walk to SpongeBob's house.

Squidward: You should be ashamed of yourselves! Bubbles. Ha. Art.

Squidward mumbles, then picks up bubble wand, sniffs it, and inhales to blow a bubble. SpongeBob and Timmy pop up out of nowhere.

SpongeBob: That'll be 25 cents, sir.

Squidward: Ah, whoa, what? Oh, who would pay 25 cents to blow bubbles?

SpongeBob: We also offer lessons for beginners.

Squidward: Beginners? What could be more simple than blowing a stupid bubble? Here's your 25 cents!

Squidward hands SpongeBob a quarter. SpongeBob bites it to see if it's real, and it bends.

Squidward: Watch and learn.

Squidward inhales deeply and begins to blow, but nothing happens.

Squidward: Uhh, wait, wait, wait. One more time. Wait.

Squidward inhales and blows again. A small bubble comes out and quickly falls to the ground and pops. Squidward looks over at SpongeBob and Timmy. They gulp then whistle. Squidward places another quarter on the stand.

Squidward: Just a mere warm-up.

SpongeBob: Hey Squidward, remember the technique.

Squidward keeps trying while SpongeBob and Patrick are trying to show him the technique.

SpongeBob and Timmy: Technique, technique, tech-

Squidward looks at them annoyed.

SpongeBob: You're not… doing the… technique.

Squidward: Technique? Technique? Technique, technique, technique, technique, TECHNIQUE ! First I do this (lifts his left leg), spin around. Stop. Double take three times. And here we go... pelvic thrust. Whooooooo, whooooooo. Oh, stop on your right foot, don't forget it. Then bring it around town. And a little of this, a little of that, a little of this, a little of that, this, that, and this. And that and this. this that this that. Then ahhhhh! Ahhhhh!!

Squidward blows huge bubble that lifts him off of the ground.

SpongeBob and Timmy: Wow!

SpongeBob: All right Squid! That was so good!

Timmy: Squid is number one!

Squidward: I really did it, didn't I? You guys didn't blow anything like that!

SpongeBob: No.

Squidward: Now that's a bubble!

SpongeBob: You said it, Squidward. See, it is all in the technique!

Timmy: Yeah, technique.

Squidward: Technique? Ha! SpongeBob, you don’t think I created that...

Squidward kisses one of his tentacle.

Squidward: ...beautiful work of art with your help? Come on, it's in my genes.

SpongeBob and Timmy: Squid's got genes! Squid's got genes!

Squidward: Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you.

Squidward goes back in his house.

SpongeBob and Timmy: Squidward, Squidward, Squidward, Squidward, Squidward, Squidward, Squidward, Squidward, Squidward, Squidward, Squidward, Squidward, Squidward, Squidward, Squidward...

Squidward: I rock!

Squidward starts playing on his clarinet when Squidward's bubble flies over them, covers Squidward's house, and pulls it out of the ground and up towards the surface of the ocean. SpongeBob notices then stops Timmy.

SpongeBob: Squidward!

SpongeBob and Timmy: Squidward! Squidward! Squidward!

Squidward: Hello my friends, you are looking at a...

Squidward looks down and sees Bikini Bottom getting farther and farther away.

SpongeBob and Timmy: Squidward!

Squidward: ...genius.

The bubble explodes.

SpongeBob and Timmy: Wow!

As house falls to the ground, SpongeBob and Timmy run towards SpongeBob’s house. Squidward's house lands in its old spot, and he plays his clarinet.