From Accct Wiki

Contents 1 Gags 1.1 Because x________ 1.2 Clips 2 Unsorted Shows 2.1 Thin Crust Loves KINGDOM HEARTS (TheKHRP) 2.1.1 (1-Davis Family, Bonnie Anderson) 2.2 Step 1: birth by sleep 2.3 Step 2: Kingdom Hearts 2.4 Step 3: Chain of Memories 2.5 Step 4: 358/2 Days 2.6 Step 5: Kingdom Hearts II 2.7 Step 6: coded 2.8 Step 7: Dream Drop Distance 2.9 To The Future (KHRP Game) 2.10 Mario Party 6 2.11 RebelTaxi NiGo Season 2 (How I Spent my Supper Vacation) 2.11.1 Intro 2.11.2 Piñata Island 2.11.3 Poké-Paradise 2.11.4 <FE:A Country> 2.11.5 Epilogue 2.12 The Downfall of CAPCOM 2.13 RebelTaxi Loves TURNER BROADCASTING (Donald Trump) 2.14 Top 10 Star Wars DI Figurines: Original Trilogy 2.15 Top 10 Star Wars DI Figurines: Prequel Trilogy 2.16 Top 10 Star Wars DI Figurines: Expanded Universe 2.17 RebelTaxi Hates STEVEN MOFFAT (#Trump4Who) 2.18 RebelTaxi Hates LET'S KILL HITLER (WtFaiz, River!?) 2.19 RebelTaxi Hates THE WEDDING OF RIVER SONG (Isn't It All Pointless?) 2.20 RebelTaxi Hates THE DOCTOR, THE WIDOW AND THE WARDROBE (Androzani, What!?) 2.21 RebelTaxi Hates ASYLUM OF THE DALEKS (Just Cameos!?!) 2.22 RebelTaxi Hates THE ANGELS TAKE MANHATTAN (Predictable) 2.23 RebelTaxi Hates THE SNOWMEN (Old Monster Desecration) 2.24 RebelTaxi Hates THE BELLS OF SAINT JOHN (Frankenstory) 2.25 RebelTaxi Hates THE NAME OF THE DOCTOR (OMGWTFGENIUS!) 2.26 RebelTaxi Hates THE DAY OF THE DOCTOR (TYLER!) 2.27 RebelTaxi Hates THE TIME OF THE DOCTOR (Pray for Petey) 2.28 RebelTaxi Hates .--. 2.29 RebelTaxi Hates GOSEI SENTAI AKIBARANGER (Humiliation) 2.30 5 reasons why TOEI must dump SABAN BRANDS 2.30.1 Prologue 2.30.2 5: Greed 2.30.3 4: The "Power Ups" 2.30.4 3: Nickelodeon's Greed 2.30.5 2: Disney's Changed 2.30.6 1: Gangnam Girls 2.30.7 Epilogue 2.31 Cartoon Network Pilots 2.31.1 Scedule 2.32 Exchange Student Zero 2.32.1 Recap 2.33 The Electric Piper 2.33.1 Thesis 2.33.2 Recap 2.34 South Park Kickstarter 2.35 Sonic Boom X (How we'd salvage Sonic Boom) 2.35.1 Step One: The Blue Blur Arc 2.35.2 Step Two: Return to Mobius 2.35.3 Step Three: The Child of Solaris 2.36 Top 5 Smashers untouched by Sakurai 2.37 Animated Atrocities Score 3 September 2013 3.1 Newcomer: DEEP DiSH 3.1.1 Arrival 3.2 The Downfall of Nintendo (#DInACE) 3.2.1 Intro 3.2.2 Animal Crossing: New Leaf 3.2.3 Wii U Woes 3.2.4 Out of Touch with the Internet 3.2.5 "Games, Not Art" 3.2.6 Phase One: The Resistance 3.2.7 Phase Two: The Offer 3.2.8 Step Three: The Rebuild 3.2.9 Outro and Events 4 Fandom Arson 4.1 3/7/15 4.2 5/4/15 4.3 Fandy Handy Dandy Guide Reverse: The Time Traveler's Guide to 2013 4.3.1 Step 1: Those Kooky Hipsters 4.3.2 Step 2: Party Hardy 4.3.3 Step 3: Time Lord Troubles 4.3.4 Step 4: 50 Shades of Lame 4.3.5 Step 5: Star Trek into Yaoi 4.3.6 Step 6: Waifu Warzone 4.3.7 Step 7: Twerk it Hard 4.3.8 Step 8: A Pokemon World 4.4 Fandy Handy Dandy Guide Reverse: The Time Traveler's Guide to 2014 4.5 Fandy Handy Dandy Guide Reverse: The Time Traveler's Guide to 2015 4.6 How I'd Fix Sword Art Online 4.6.1 1: Fleshing Out the Game 4.6.2 2: Party System 4.6.3 3: Asuna 4.6.4 4: Kirito 4.6.5 5: Tentacle Porn 4.6.6 6: A Balanced Cast 4.6.7 7: The Premise 4.7 How I'd Fix Sailor Moon 4.7.1 6: Time Shenanigans 4.8 MARVEL VS DC: The Other Guys 4.9 HDG-R: What to Expect Smash 5 4.9.1 Opening Comic 4.9.2 Thesis 4.9.3 Step One: Time to Cut the Cheese 4.9.4 Step Two: The comeback Kids 4.9.5 Step Three: This Stage is Just too Small 4.9.6 Step Four: Gotta Catch 'Em All! 4.9.7 Step Five: Trophy Tussle 4.9.8 Step Six: Tentpole Overdose 4.9.9 Step Seven: New Tentpole Overdose 4.9.10 Step Eight: Can't Beat the Classics 4.9.11 Step Nine: Spinning Off the Deep End 4.10 Smash Underground 4.11 Shorts 4.11.1 Thesis 4.11.2 Episode Zero: The Blinkers 4.11.3 Prologue 4.11.4 Episode 2: Alien8ed 4.11.5 Episode 1: The Wishing Rock 4.11.6 Episode 2.5.: Super Spurts 4.11.7 Episode 4: Big Bad Booger 4.12 GHOSTBUSTERS (2016) 4.13 Boy who Would be Queen v Just the Two of Us 4.14 Bionicle Legends of Metru Nui 4.15 Exchange Student Zero 4.16 Dr Eggman's Tomato Sauce 4.16.1 Recap 4.16.2 Conclusion 4.17 Size Matters 4.18 Late Fees Rogerified 4.19 Once Upon a Townsville 4.19.1 Opening Skit 4.19.2 Recap 4.19.3 Conclusion 4.20 Don't Judge Me 4.20.1 Recap 4.20.2 Conclusion 4.20.2.1 Horrible Mistakes 4.20.2.2 Final Words 4.21 Top 10 Reasons to Stuff Kingdom Hearts into Homestuck 4.21.1 Ditch Doze 4.21.2 Retcon Trolls 4.21.3 Artificial Identities 4.21.4 Character Prototyping 4.21.5 A Victory for the Midnight Crew 4.21.6 The Fall of English 4.21.7 Callie Ohpeee 4.22 Guilt Tripping 4.22.1 Bedroom 4.23 WTF is Care Bear Stars 4.24 The Lorax Fandom and You 4.24.1 Step One: Watching the Movie 4.24.2 Skit 4.24.3 Step Two: Count the Characters one, two and three 4.24.3.1 Skit 4.24.4 Step 3: The Askblog Cometh 4.24.4.1 Skit 4.24.5 Step 4: Camp -- 4.25 Step 5: Thneedville High 4.26 Step 6: Principle of Business 4.27 Step 7: The Truffula Flu 4.28 Step 8: Deoncelerization 4.28.1 Skit 4.29 Epilogue 4.30 Oncest 4.30.1 Recap 4.31 Rainy Day (My Bed Bugs) 4.31.1 Recap 4.32 #41: "Video Game References" (Teen Titans Go!) 4.33 #42: Super Smash Bros. 4.34 #43: Gadget 2.0. (Inspector Gadget 2015) 4.35 #44: Hose Water (Teen Titans Go!) 4.36 #46: Robopeck (Back at the Barnyard) 4.37 #47: Jimmy Timmy Power Hour (FOP) 4.38 #48: Disney Infinity 2.0. 4.38.1 Part 1: The Toy Box and its Games 4.38.2 Part 2: Playsets 4.38.3 Part 3: An Open Letter to John Vignocchi 4.39 #49: 4.40 #50: Sonic Boom X (Re-Imaginating) 4.41 #60: Arc Rise Fantasia 4.42 #Q: Marville Livewire 5 WHATCULTURE 5.1 7 things from the past ten years that will utterly depress you 5.1.1 7. Twitch Plays Pokemon has better writers than most children's cartoons 5.1.2 6. The Death of Saturday Morning Cartoons 5.1.3 5. Robocop's Reboot features barely any Robocop! 5.1.4 4. Duke Nukem Forever 5.1.5 3. Video Games have become a Floundering Industry 5.1.6 2. A World Without Toonami 5.1.7 1. The Hamburglar is a better Human than You! 5.2 7 Essential Tips for Kingdom Hearts to Pull its act together 5.2.1 Intro 5.2.2 7. Reboot that sonnabitch! 5.2.3 6. Two Worlds, One Family 5.2.4 5. A trip into the Toy Box 5.2.5 4. Greyer Morality 5.2.6 3. 5.2.7 2. 5.2.8 1.

Gags

Because x________

Clips

• Of Course!

Unsorted Shows

Thin Crust Loves KINGDOM HEARTS (TheKHRP)

<Pan Pizza: The Coach>

Pan Pizza: Okay, So what in godbear's name has you believing that you're Rebel Taxi Material?

<Thin Crust: Rookie of the Year>

Thin Crust: Well, I've got this Idea for a video segment It's called the 'Waifu of the Day'.

Pan Pizza: The What?

Thin Crust: My friend this is where I Select an Image of a chick that Turns me on rock hard and then Immortalise it on my Wall!

Pan Pizza: Do you have an Example of this new gag?

Thin Crust: Quite, do you know why they're going for a prequel instead of a sequel...

Pan Pizza: I'm sure they have a legitamate reason fo-(sees the Waifu) Ohh...Ohhhhhh!!! AW! YES!

Thin Crust: Think she's a better Idea than Monsters University...

Pan Pizza: Hell to the Yes!

Thin Crust: Thank you, As for my Segment Idea, Try this on for Size!

(Intro)

Pan Pizza: Ooohh... Pirated, I like that part in ya.

Thin Crust: And what do ya think of the set?

Pan Pizza: <Your Opinion of the Set>

Thin Crust: Alright, We've got a Show to do so let's get right to it. You and Me are gonna roll on through the entire Seeker of Darkness Saga for the Project, Run down an Elaborate Analysis of each of the Games and get into details of what we want to see. We add the Characters to our boster board that we've got there and plan out our story with you guys the fans. The first thing we gotta do is this... (drops the Xehanort Saga in the Garbage) with that said, lets dig into the leftovers.

(1-Davis Family, Bonnie Anderson)

Pan Pizza: uhhhh... Toy Story?

Thin Crust: yep.

Pan Pizza: the first ever CGI feature length film

Thin Crust: yep.

Pan Pizza: What? Are ya pulling my leg or somthin... huh?

Thin Crust: No Sempai, I'm ensuring Kingdom Hearts III becomes the first ever Interactive Motion Picture

Pan Pizza: What?

Thin Crust: It's a dream of mine... I'd be delighted to see this dream realised.

Pan Pizza: Yeah, Nobody Cares so... Why them?

Thin Crust: Why do I think the Davis clan and Bonnie Anderson are Important Characters? Well, in this story I'm setting up, Terra is Andy's Older Brother and Eraqus is the Father.

Step 1: birth by sleep

---

Next is Vanitas, a creepy mofo who spawns these Unversed creatures all over place.

And finally, There's Master Anthony Brian Xehanort. He's more or less a good guy who will ultimately reboot the franchise without that Rich Bitch Destiny Taking the wheel. He knows for a fact that nopony can die in this kind of Franchise, just ask Nomura!

Step 2: Kingdom Hearts

And this is where we get the Sora, Riku and Kairi we've come to know. Let's Add the Toys to our Box here

Step 3: Chain of Memories

Step 4: 358/2 Days

Step 5: Kingdom Hearts II

Step 6: coded

Step 7: Dream Drop Distance

---

And Reibranz makes it all complete! Give him a round of applause, for he's the last character we're gonna get in the games so far! Let us Cinnabrate!

To The Future (KHRP Game)

Mario Party 6

RebelTaxi NiGo Season 2 (How I Spent my Supper Vacation)

Intro

It's been one shell of a ride for my sempai and my comrade, A Gurren-Lagann Review, an interview with Maxwell Atoms, A subscription from one of our least enjoyable people... It's been a blast to see it unfold, But now's the time to ask: Doof, where have you been? Well, Now I'm ready to tell ya! Welcome, my friends, to Season 2.

Piñata Island

Poké-Paradise

<FE:A Country>

During Alph's time in the Pokémon world, I was with my Dragonauge... or at least, the young lady who used to be my Dragonauge...

Epilogue

Eventually, We reunited at another universe altogether. There was coffee as we saw a Curious Comet pass by which would be refined into the Cosby Comet you see before you by me and Deep Dish using a mysterious power embued upon us by a nebula of some sort. I think it gave the last guy cancer...

The Downfall of CAPCOM

Nintendo has gotten itself out of its sales slump when it comes to the Wii U... for now at least... But there's one target that I mentioned that may get Disney's Foot in the Door when it comes to the Japanese Market and, you guessed it, taking over the world.

<Cue Capcom clip>

But what can you do with a company as troubled as Capcom. Well for starters, we can breathe new life into Megaman since the last Megaman Game was a just a fanmade crossover with Street Fighter. Let's face it we did not expect the latest Megaman to come from Goddamn Box Art, Like, Dude, that may seem funny to some people but to the fans who trusted you to put Megaman in the Game, That's a dangerously low blow, dude!

Moving on to Dead Rising, the latest notable franchise on our list. The timeline and mythos now spans more than a Decade with it's third Installment, I see a bottle of Nerd Rage in your future.

Devil May Cry, badass hack n' slash adventure. Recently suffered just because the story was rebooted in a vain attempt to appeal to western audiences, although Raptor News has some potential. Not Disney's cup of tea but what can you do? Also unlikely to survive unscathed in the big Disney Buyout to come...

Resident Evil, A lesson from Don Bluth says: Children can take anything as long as there's a Happy Ending. You don't need to make it overly sappy, just have the goal of the game unsures that everybody lives, and that they're all in this Together, speaking of Sunday School Musical

Capcom Fighters are definitely a Packaged Deal, Especially when you count in the Capcom vs. Whatever Franchise, Which crosses over Street Fighter, Darkstalkers, All those Classic Capcom Fighters, even the other Capcom franchises out there and renders all deals to buy individual franchises entirely useless. I'm including Breath of Fire and Power Stone because I guess they're fighters, I dunno, I never even heard of 'em except for Power Stone for it is badass. According to a recent tweet from Yoshinoki Ono, the creator of Street Fighter, Capcom does not have enough resources to even port over Ultra Street Fighter 4, The money thing I get since they only have at most 152 million bucks left to spend, And they fired half their european staff. It's painfully obvious that Capcom's goin' Tits up in the months to come.

Bad Buisness Habits, Overreliance on bad DLC, Burying franchises, Milking only one franchise 'til it's bone dry, Needless to say, They're Screwed and you're in luck! Who's biting first, Midway, Arc, Dare I say... Disney? As you can tell by my collection of Disney Infinity Swag, The Answer is obvious.

Act now and you can relegate the very Management who got them into this mess to man the Ticket Booths at Tokyo Disneyland.

RebelTaxi Loves TURNER BROADCASTING (Donald Trump)

Pan Pizza: Welcome Back to Divorce Horse! If you are just joining us, Donald Trump needs to his Broadcasting Empire beyond Just the Apprentice.

---

Thin Crust: Pan, We wish to negotiate some terms for Donald Trump.

Top 10 Star Wars DI Figurines: Original Trilogy

3.0.'s coming up faster than a sweating bullet, and with it: Star Wars. We already know the guys from The Force Awakens will be well on their way to the Toy Factory, but there's no word on the Trilogy that started it all and that's what I'm counting down.

Top 10 Star Wars DI Figurines: Prequel Trilogy

Top 10 Star Wars DI Figurines: Expanded Universe

RebelTaxi Hates STEVEN MOFFAT (#Trump4Who)

RebelTaxi Hates LET'S KILL HITLER (WtFaiz, River!?)

---

The Doctor: Put him in the Cuboard.

Pan Pizza: What?

Pan Pizza: WHAT!? They have the oppritunity to explore a universe where World War Dos is freakin stopped and you shelve that plotline for-?

(Mels collapses)

Pan Pizza: Well, She was completely Pointless, Wasn't she...

Thin Crust: Actually...

Pan Pizza: Let's give a gihugic novelty hand to Mels the Most Pointless companion ever!

<Cue Party Scene from Wild Force>

The Doctor: We'll call your parents,

Mels:

<The same scene from Wild Force where everone stops partying>

Pan Pizza: *getting his pot out* huh?

Mels: Penny in the air...

Pan Pizza: Oh, no.

Mels: Penny Drops.

Pan Pizza: Thinny, Who names their kid "Mels".

Thin Crust: No one! It must be short for something like-

Mels: Melody.

The Doctor: You named your daughter... after your daughter.

Thin Crust:

RebelTaxi Hates THE WEDDING OF RIVER SONG (Isn't It All Pointless?)

RebelTaxi Hates THE DOCTOR, THE WIDOW AND THE WARDROBE (Androzani, What!?)

---

It starts with a spaceship exploding at the hands of the Doctor-Wait! I'm gonna need some Doritos and Mountain Dew, It's pretty obvious that this episode's gonna rely solely on Rule of Cool here... The Doctor survives the noisy fall from space to the serface of Early 20th Century London through a fancy Impact Suit-Hold Up! This just isnt the Right Size Bag and Bottle for the Job...(The Bottle and bag are replaced with a 20 oz bottle and a family sized bag) ...What? I needed something a bit more potent...

However, seeing the Doctor not only survive, but making sounds, in the airless vacuum of space is ridiculous. Further, the Doctor should have burned up in the Earth’s atmosphere, or been splattered into smithereens by the force of impact. But, it’s Christmas, and for once, Steven Moffat tried to offer an explanation for his seeming plot hole, so I’m gonna let this one slide – even if said explanation (the Doctor is wearing an “impact suit” that is repairing his damaged body, which is why he cannot remove the helmet, thus hiding his face from Madge, and leading to the events of the episode) is a bit contrived.

---

And Now, If you excuse me. I have a Six Hour Challenge to Run for Toonami and a Best Doctor Who Stories List to compile for the Campaign. And seeing as the Toonami Six Hour is Super Cereal because Cartoons, The Latter of the two (Pulls Snacks from under the Table) It's Gonna be all Your Fault! Pepsico Foodstuffs Wrapped in Kilbasa and Spicy Italian Sausages, Don't fail me now!

RebelTaxi Hates ASYLUM OF THE DALEKS (Just Cameos!?!)

Thin Crust: This Episode...Ugh!

Pan Pizza: What he's saying is... Ugh!

Both: It makes no... Gah!!!

Thin Crust: Asylum of the Daleks... I mean this is the lowest a Dalek story can possibly get, Lower than Destiny of the Daleks, Lower than Revalation, Evolution even! This thing looses to the one where a Dalek Rams a Guy up his Time Vortex to become...This!

---

Pan Pizza: This is by far the Jumping the Shark Moment of all Dalek-kind, Ruining them for the rest of the series and I hope to christ that the Daleks are soon Retired after this episode because we cant handle what kind of re-establishment Moffat would have in Store for the Show.

Thin Crust: With a Plot made of Swiss Cheese and wasted opportunities aplenty, this is by far the worst season opener since Warriors of the Deep. If you know what that is from whatever source you heard it from, please go take a few minutes with us... (He and Pan Pizza stare into the Mirror in tears)

-Transition-

Thin Crust: Now do you understand why we need this Masterplan?

RebelTaxi Hates THE ANGELS TAKE MANHATTAN (Predictable)

For this episode Moffat should be bringing his A-Game. He would ensure that the Ponds' Exit from the Show is a worthwhile adventure and perk up those who still have faith in him after the total train wrecks he wrote beforehand...

---

Ya know, This scene is not only pointless but it spoils the surprise you've got for Rory! Speaking of The boy who waited...

---

Ya see that tombstone that's over there If anyone in the audience does not see this thing being important later allow me to get you a number for a good psychiatrist.

---

(Bwaaaaa! Bwa-Bwaaa-Bwaaa!)

Rory begs the Doc- Wait, Ya Know what? I'm not even gonna call him that! Rory Begs Shinji the Slinky to try and fix this but Shinji the Slinky reminds him of fixed time. My god I can't believe I Live in a Universe where this is acctually Possible

Rory Decides to Commit Suicide to in order to change his future and cause a paradox against fixed time. He assures Amy that he could be ressurected and Joins him just as the Shinji the Slinky

(Bwaaaaa! Bwa-Bwaaa-Bwaaa!)

Thin Crust: See, The reason why we saw them get zapped right in front of their eyes which we commonfolk use to...you know, See Them... is Because Karen Gillan has made her desision about leaving the show Final!

Pan Pizza: So the Doc- Ya know what, I'm not even gonna call him that <Insert Insult name>

RebelTaxi Hates THE SNOWMEN (Old Monster Desecration)

I think I get it now, Moffat's Secret! I get why Blink didn't Focus on The Doctor and his companion at the time Martha Jones. I understand why Donna Noble was Trapped inside the Data Core away from the Doctor, I actually get the divorce subplot! River Song, Amelia Williams and Clara Ozwin Ozwald are all gimmick added to the show to keep < Rose Tyler > The Girl who Waited, The Doctor's quot-unquot "Wife", and now... the girl who died twice. They're merely gimmick to keep Rose around Moffat figured out how to cheat the system and let that bitch < Regeneraaaaaaate! >

Now do you see why this dickhole must be evacuated from the franchise...It's the Lucas Effect, he rocked then but he blows now...

RebelTaxi Hates THE BELLS OF SAINT JOHN (Frankenstory)

Hey, kids. Let's play Steven Moffat Bingo! Since we all know how ball-lickingly bad he's gotten at writing, I decided to create this Bingo Card with every element from Moffat's other stories each having a shot of an alcoholic beverage to help calm your nerves. There's a lot of contribance to watch and alot of Booze to Drink so let's take a look at The Bells of Saint John.

In the Prequel, The Doctor Encounters Clara as a little Girl...

It's bad enough when I have to take a shot this early, now Moffat's soiled one of Amy's few defining gimmicks! (Takes a shot)

The plot's kind of like the Idiot's Lantern, y'know the 2012 Olympics? As we see a warning from the Internet except the members of said internet is trapped with their computer webcam or something...God! A Blink reference, really? Your award winning story from when he didn't suck is getting shoehorned into this mess. Sorry, Steve-O... that's another shot against you. (takes a shot) Is copying your own work plagerism or fetish...

And that was the Bells of St John. (gets cross-eyed) Nope, need a minute. < Emergency Stomach Pump Session > it's shit! It plagiarised a story we have already seen in the idiots lantern, it spits in the face of River Song by all the flirting on screen with Clara, and the villains were a concept more suited for a 90s comic script for the Tick. And considering how many times actors return to Dr Who as new and more plot integral characters (the Brigadier, Gwen Cooper, Martha Jones, etc.) I don't really feel the impact of THIS COMPANION who died twice... Hell even Colin Baker was brought back to be the DOCTOR!!! the actress playing Oswin then goes on to play a character called Clara... I don't see a big deal to start bringing this up now. Also if was first named Oswin in her first life, then Clara in her second life, why is she Clara again? Her character concept is a plot hole in of itself...!!

RebelTaxi Hates THE NAME OF THE DOCTOR (OMGWTFGENIUS!)

This was Balls, This entire series of Doctor Who was flat-out Chicken Balls. To watch Moffat's earlier work especially Curse of Fatal Death knowing the shit I know now is just dissapointing. To even look at Steven Moffat's Face since the whole dang season has passed is painful to me. It is why I use the Image of Sayaka to represent him. She delt with stress and fell into darkness, Just like Moffat but at least she wasnt aware of what Octavia Von Sekkendoff has done in her existance.

Moffat has Made every story of series 7 its own blockbuster. And Moffat's Stories as of Late have been known for Angering the Fanbase in Three Ways, Jumping the Shark, Nuking the Fridge and Frying the Coke.

And the Moffat Era has been Very Crappy Thus Far with Walking Gimmicks, Inconsistant Time Lords and Plot Holes the size of the Grand Canyon but we have yet to experience the big moment series seven has been building up towards, The Moment Doctor Who Fries the Coke! I dont think It's gonna happen here tonight and Moffat's acctually being clever for -What's this?

Wait a minute, this could be it. The Doctor seems to be swallowing his pride.

He's standing there sadly...

Could this be the Frying the Coke Moment

Yes! Yes!

And we're safe! They did not reveal the Doctor's Name at all, and thank god. Cause that could have fried the coke big time.

Oh, dear... The Shark Chart's off the scale...

And there it goes, It hit the Highest Setting of Jumping the Shark, Coming Back to Shoot in the Nads, Rape it, Eat it's flesh, consume it soul, mount it's head on the wall and rinsing and repeating the process on twelve other goddamn sharks just to be safe! Johnny Hurt is living proof that Doctor Who Needs Saving! So keep tweeting the Hashtag #DisneyWho to ensure that No further Jumping the Shark Moments Occur and the Fans Have a say in the Production of the Franchise.

RebelTaxi Hates THE DAY OF THE DOCTOR (TYLER!)

You know what, I take it all back... Everything I said about... 'Mels' and the Rose Tyler Gimmick-Clones... All of it... I take everything back... Because I knew somehow it was gonna get worse...

and worse...

and worse...

and worse...

and worse...

and God-Jeaaabust! I'm sure you can forgive me for the hell I raised, Right Whoniverse... You're not gonna ruin the Anniversary for everyone right? Please... :(

And that was Day of the Doctor, Oh my christ... That certainly was a Wild Ride though Space and Time.

RebelTaxi Hates THE TIME OF THE DOCTOR (Pray for Petey)

Poor Matt Smith. He's proven to be one of the most Magnificent Actors to play the Doctor. He has had a stellar freshman year, but was screwed into a rather iffy sophamore year, an absolutely retarded junior year and a rather confusing Senior Year. But it all has to end somewhere and what better way to Graduate than in the confines of a Christmas Special. I kinda wanna see the Doctor Who christmas specials on the Isle of Misfit Christmas Specials on Platypus Comix. I also wanna see a fourth Policy Trailer Jamboree.

RebelTaxi Hates .--.

RebelTaxi Hates GOSEI SENTAI AKIBARANGER (Humiliation)

The Seventeenth Super Sentai, the one that was snubbed by it's American cousin Power Rangers and for good reason. We're taking a look at Gosei Senta-I F**king Hate Akibaranger!

5 reasons why TOEI must dump SABAN BRANDS

Prologue

Greetings, People of Youtube.

5: Greed

Budget Restraints.

• huh*

What this means is: they can choose to do just about anything to save some money for their bottom line.

• Huh*

4: The "Power Ups"

So, the nerdy Noah transforms into the badass Gokai Blue? And Jake into Green is kinda fitting, KINDA. Because Jake is the jokester, but he's not clumsy... Right, Don?

First off, A "Power Up" should enhance the look and the abilities of the current rangers. Second, Why do they have to change suits only to change to another suit? Third, Kibaranger with the Zyurangers pretty much worked out 'cuz they both have bestial motifs (dinosaurs for Zyuranger, mythical beasts for Dairanger). But Gokai Silver with the Goseigers? The pirate motif isn't really anywhere near to the angel motif... And the Main Problem, This version of powering up diminishes the well designed suits of the Gokaiger and essentially skips a full group of heroes! Henceforth, I Hereby Propose a new Law for adapting Power Ranger Teams to prevent this sheer lazyness, All Ranger Teams must be their Own Seperate Entity. I notice the Zordon Era has a special Problem. Dont worry, the Masterplan in this Bright Red Folder Donated from an Anonymous source has all the Answers. And Yes, This TARDIS Blue Folder also has a masterplan that will also be Important.

It's Funny because Toei Explicitly demanded that no Sentai shall be skipped, the fact that Saban Found this Loophole Agri-vates the Toku Faithful to no end.

3: Nickelodeon's Greed

Here's that first mistake that screwed everything up for fandom. I ran into a little kid in a Power Rangers T-Shirt one time at my Local Wal*Mart and said to me, "Where are the Power Rangers? Where did the go?" Guess which Red Ranger I spotted on said shirt, Jaden Shiba! I directed him to the local TV Tropes where he can get learned about The franchise beyond the Samurai Rangers and he would be humiliated and publicly insulted by Local Veterans of the Power Rangers Fandom. This is what two consecutive Twenty-Episode Seasons do to our generation. Why would they order only twenty episodes when clearly there's more than double that amount in Stock Footage. I'll give you a hint, Who's Bright Yellow, Peaked with a Movie, and Lives in a Pineapple Under the Sea. And that's not all el orange couch has done to add insult to injury, We also can also blame it for the Dissapearence of Power Rangers from Vortexx. Oh, Spongebob, Ruining the lives of his neighbors one day at a time.

2: Disney's Changed

And now, we have a new segment on the Show called < Kid-Vid! Slowly Dying, but still sorta okay > In 2001, they were given a choice, Ultimately Haim only wanted a huge pile of money to further his political goals and so he handed over the whole dang Ship to Buena Vista, One of the Walt Disney Company's Corporate Lap Dogs. We could have seen much better seasons in the Kalish Era, SPD would have been Epic, Mystic Force would have been Magestic, Operation Overdrive...would have been Watchable! But no, they Watered it down with explosions and Censorship, only letting up just so they could stuff it in the cupboard that they called ABC Kids.

But that's the thing with Disney, they didn't buy Saban for Saban. They Bought It for ABC Family, Everything Else they got was Junk to lock away into the vault, Even the Rangers! It was only saved from the void of obscurity by the Suggestion to film their Series in New Zealand where they Ironically ban Power Rangers, I might add. And to Top it all off, this half-hearted purchase became the catalyst for Michael Eisener's Removal from Office and the beginning of Iger's reign in the Magic Kingdom. If they were to give Power Rangers a Second Chance with Bob in control, They would welcome the franchise back with open arms and a clearer, Kalish-Free head.

1: Gangnam Girls

If the Internet is whining about how what the name would be applied to then you're officially Ruined Forever. The Name "Gangnam Girls" is More Freakin' Dated than a Transformer with an Afro, like, is it a disco ball? er... how do you transform with that thing? Huh? You'd think It would be one of those 4Kids-type dubs with that specific kind of Suck but clearly nothing good can come of their works when the name alone has the potential to doom the anime industry in America. Goodbye, Toonami ...again: Hello, World War III. I've said it before in the much less mature first draft of this video. Laziness can be excused, World-Threatening Racism cannot. The fact that we live in a world where the assumption that Asians are all the same could trigger the end of aforementioned world should be some cause for alarm. But if this Abomination comes in to ruin our day, We're History. Obviously something is wrong with the brilliant men who recruited five fantastic actors to portray that one group of Courageous Teenagers with additude since the day Murdoch left the Blokes at Buena Vista to gunt up his fridge and burn his house down with lemons, Because their age and the age of the rest of the fine folk at Saban Brands is as obvious as it can get with Gangnam Girls.

Epilogue

And those are my Five Problems with Saban Brands, But there is some good news, If you didn't hear me back with the Power Up Segment, A good fellow has handed me a Masterplan for Funimation should they get Motivation from the Fans and Rider Kick The 64-year-old virgins at Saban Brands back into the Nightosphere whence it came.

Cartoon Network Pilots

Scedule

Mars Safari fizzles out at 12

My Science Project disgusts the childrens at 12:15

Mystery Roomies echoes an old friend at 12:30

Steven Universe shows it's stripes at 12:45

Clarence drags us down at 1

Lakeford County Turbo picks us back up again at 1:15

Wolf's Rain sinks it's teeth into the 1:30 slot.

Super Pig slips through the cracks at 2

We'll top it all off with Fanime Selects at 2:30

--

Six Hours that are anything but wasted.

Exchange Student Zero

Recap

So, our story begins with

The Electric Piper

Thesis

Okay,

Recap

South Park Kickstarter

Do you like nickelodeon? Well, Have we got an Idea for you, a Roast of the first kids network from your favorite white trash redneck mountain town South Park! The Laziness and Racism of Saban, Overreliance on Spongebob, good shows being forgotten by the network and so much more will be covered by this episode. The title of the episode: Super Megasuck, But we need your help to make it happen. If you donate some money to fund this special episode of South Park or if you Tweet the hashtag #SuperMegasuck to Trey and Matt's Twitter Accounts and other Twittermen with strong ties to South Park and get the guys to actually acknowledge this movement, we could see a true game changer for Nick. I dont expect to see this be a success but if it ends up raising the $64,000 needed for a single episode, I will surely be amazed. I'll be doing extra incentives for this project, $86,000 - Tara Strong as Trini, The Original Yellow Power Ranger, as in the one with the vacant role, to sum up, she'll have a voice similar to Twilight Sparkle and Illana from Sym-biotic Titan as that's far closer to Trini than whover Saban Picked up for the show. $100,000 - Live Broadcasting not just on Comedy Central, but also on Nickelodeon where the sponge sleeps... Speaking of the Sponge, $128,000: Tom Kenny and company join the jamboree

Sonic Boom X (How we'd salvage Sonic Boom)

Alright, last time we visited the Blue Blur. They've been reduced to tending to mobius' elderly, with their franchise ultimately being the centerpiece which, due to Bill Friedberg's stellar writing and quality pedigree, has found sadly itself on life support. But there's a way to save the franchise from the mobile's nasty kiss. May I introduce Sonic Boom X: The starting point today's potential fans of the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise deserve! We'll be breaking down what needs to happen in the show, arc by arc, and figure out which of Sonic's comrades from throughout the franchise from the Games to the Comics. The Goal is to provide a great new jumping in point for incoming franchise newcomers and to pretty much succeed where Bill and his cronies beaten and bashed said franchise into a bloody lifeless pulp. With that out of the way, let's discuss potential showrunners.

DeeP DiSH: Personally, in terms of showrunners. I'd go with Ken Penders, He was one of the Sonic Writers I grew up with reading the Comics.

Step One: The Blue Blur Arc

Size: 3 episodes

THiN CRUST: So the first Arc is going to be a three episode introduction to Sonic's character as well as the Major Plot Device of the series, The Star Egg, an Interstellar Amusement Park that saw the earthbound area developed into Robotropolis, with more and more area being built over the natural landscapes the longer Robotropolis stands, the environment suffers because of it, but that's a minor detail here, wouldn't want this to go all Captain Planet on us, now would we. Sonic and Tails are relaxing in their island home with Amy Rose, but then along comes Sally Acorn, Princess of a Kingdom imperiled by the overgrowth of Robotropolis, to find Angel Island and see if it's untouched by Robotropolis' noxic spread. Sonic decides not to do that but to take the battle head-on by himself, Ending Episode One.

DeeP DiSH: Episode Two begins with a montage of the best levels of Sonic the Hedgehog 1-4 and Knuckles. Green Hill, -Ice Level-, -Ruins Level-, The Works. And it leads Sonic to Robotropolis where he meets the Freedom Fighters, Antoine, Rotor, Bunnie, -, and Nicole. The Band of Heroes venture across the Kingdom of Machines to reach the centerpiece of this Robot Apocalypse waiting to happen. We catch a glimpse at another couple Hedgehogs at the end of the episode, one pitch black with silver streaks, another who is silver all around. These two are members of the Cult of Lyric: A group of Mobians sworn to keep the eponymous Child of Solaris sealed away in a temple which was ripped from the Lost Hex to be the centerpiece of the Star Egg's hub area. We end the episode with a shot of the temple and the glowing red seal on the shrine.

THiN CRUST: Episo- no.

DeeP DiSH: But Boss!

THiN CRUST: No means No, I am not reading this!

DeeP DiSH: I promise it's not as convoluted as it is with their native games!

THiN CRUST: But the games you're referencing in this episode are nothing but Jokes!

DeeP DiSH: It'll work.

THiN CRUST: What?

DeeP DiSH: I wrote the scenarios from the memory I have from marathoning Sonic Let's Plays and Sonic Dissected, I have researched every wiki page in the Sonic News Network Wiki, I have read the Sonic Comic during the later part of Ken Penders' time with the comic. It'll Work.

THiN CRUST: ...fine. But don't complain if we lose subscribers. Episode Three's where the Major Character Conflict of the series comes into play, Sonic believes that Eggman's perfectly content with overcharging people for a vacation at a five-planets-in-one interstellar resort, while Tails is hesitant to trust 'Ol Egghead. They don't have time to think about this as two of the Deadly Six are pursuing Wisps in what appears to be an attempt to get a free annual pass at first because with prices this astronomical, who wouldn't want a decade pass to this park. But these clowns are actually seeking to use the wisps to break the seal placed upon their creator: wait for it... Lyric. Sonic rescues the wisps the two Ibla were chasing {Ibla? Oh, gimme a break...} and Sonic zaps out of their range and end up in front of Eggman whom they have chatted with during the start of the episode, he wants Sonic to surrender the Wisps to him in exchange for what amounts to two free years in Boom's version of Eggmanland, Sonic hesitates at first but Eggman insists that they'll be safe from the Deadly Six, but the tone is somewhat off, cluing Sonic into a more complex nature to Eggman's Facade. Sonic accepts the offer but the Lazer wisp warps him away again but makes a wrong turn towards the Tomb of Lyric, causing Sonic to slide brake himself across the floor... Smudging the seal that keeps Lyric in and the Deadly Six out.

<Cue Clip of Lyric's arrival>

Audio: Ah! Now you Fucked Up!

Step Two: Return to Mobius

size: 4 episodes

Long Story Short, Lyric curses Sonic with a special hex before shipping him off from the Western Galaxy, Which sets up our next segment of the Lyric Arc, which I have dubbed Return to Mobius where Sonic is Stranded on Earth for four episodes which is thankfully thirteen times shorter than the Original Sonic X. There we find out that Sonic is Cursed to walk the earth as a Warehog in the Moonlight while the rising sun grants him the form of the dominant species of this particular planet Lyric's sealed the blue blue away in. You already know what the dominant species is because you're watching this video, are you not? After wandering into the Thorndyke residence in the evening he meets Chris just as he does in the original series. When the Sun Rises, Sonic discovers the day part and gets himself dressed with whatever spare clothes he can find lying around. After a day at school where he meets Chris' friends, he tries to find a way back to Mobius, Going as far as drawing the same Rozmajin. Lyric inflicted onto him.

Step Three: The Child of Solaris

Size: 6 Episodes

Top 5 Smashers untouched by Sakurai

Animated Atrocities Score

• Gary Torture Porn: x$1 Billion
• Status Quo is God: x$1 Million
• Fatal Heart Attack Fuel: x$1 Million
• Mopey-Dopey Love Talk: x$128,000
• Patrick's A Prick: x$50,000
• Squidward Torture Porn: x$10,000
• Character Derailment: x$30-$3000 depending on importance of Character
• Hypocritical Moral: x$200

September 2013

Newcomer: DEEP DiSH

Arrival

EyEyEyEyEy! Which way do I go so that I can reach my home of-

DEEP DiSH: Who are you and what the Faiz are you doing in my grandma's TV?

Your Grandma's TV? Heh... I Applaud the RVT reference but...Your Grandma's TV?

DEEP DiSH: Yeah, I used to have this thing where I crashed at my grandma's place...Doin' it for old times sake so shut up!

Well, I won't till you point me to the way home, I got stuck in California by those Esquire Network bastards and I've been traveling ever since I picked up a few souvenirs from Texas as evidenced by my location in the previous review shown here.

DEEP DiSH: Wait, you're an Internet Critic?

Proud driver of the Rebel Taxi NiG0!

DEEP DiSH: How come I never heard of you?

Because I only have a subscriber headcount in the early triple digits...

DEEP DiSH: And you sure you can get me on That Guy with the Glasses.com?

I hope to get all the RT Bozos onto That Guy with the Glasses!

DEEP DiSH: How so? On that Inked Reality division they think they're gonna make?

Maybe!

DEEP DiSH: Yeah, guess it's better than nuthin'...

Yeah, If my Cinemark review doesn't get me on Pan's Good Side then the whole TGWTG business certainly-(sniffs) I sense a Disturbance in the force...and it coming from- Are you the DEEP DiSH guy I've been courting to add to my crew?

DEEP DiSH: You courted to join your crew, and it was unsuccessful 'til you managed to show up here with your magic trick. How'd you do that?

Well, I convert my body into electrical energy and I have to find a screen to stay on before I fizzle out of biomass and die so I usually recharge on any electrical gadget with a screen. That was where your Grandma's TV Screen came into the Picture! By the way for every state I made a video in, I pick up a few souvenirs so I hope you can carry them over.

DEEP DiSH: Well, I do all the Hard Work so... will do.

The Downfall of Nintendo (#DInACE)

Intro

This is going to be my most insightful video ever because I have a lot to say on this matter, I love Nintendo and I hope it'll stick around for 100 more years... But it won't unless we have some change upstairs, We're aiming to Kill the Beast ...metaphorically!

Animal Crossing: New Leaf

If you think Animal Crossing New Leaf is a satisfactory Game for the 3DS Lineup, you are sadly mistaken. Here's a Dissatisfied Customer who wants change in Nintendo's Kingdom in terms of her Animal Crossing adventures

The game was fun at the beginning when trying to unlock all the different shops and upgrading my house but once I caught or dug up everything, once all the shops were made, the game just got.... boring. Repetitive. Dull. I get there are people who like this game and I'm sure they probably still like it but I need more substance in the long run. I can't constantly play a game where I only get a few rewards of holidays and such threw out the year to make me want to keep playing. If this had more to do like mini games or some small manner of monster combat like if it was set in an RPG Fantasy world, it would be a lot more fun. As it is, its not my thing.

She Demolished her Town on a tuesday. Sad, All too sad...

Wii U Woes

You wanna know how many Wii U consoles have been sold so far... For the Chrystler, You already know this by now. I would love for Nintendo to make Mario games forever, but I also want the Wii U to be more than my Mario, Kirby or “Insert classic Nintendo character name here” console. I could quite honestly pop four AAs in my (still-working!) original Game Boy for that. I’m not the only one. Times have been tough for Nintendo. The company has been particularly hard hit by the rise of mobile games, which largely appeal to the same kind of lighthearted gamers as Nintendo titles. Comparisons to Sega, which had to switch from being a hardware company to a publisher after poor sales, are everywhere, especially after the company confirmed this week to GamesIndustry.biz that it’s selling the Wii U at a loss.

It's Current offering is Pikmin 3 and Let's face it, It isnt my cup of tea nor is it your. If I'm wrong and It is your cup of tea, I apoligize and more power to ya. But do we really want a new alliteration of Mario Kart or Smash Bros. Especially since all that's been goin' down upstairs. Games like The Wonderful 101, which was developed by Platinum Games and will be published by Nintendo, were great in demos. Nintendo’s also working to make using Wii U’s Game Pad controller a more integral part of the game, rather than the way it’s mostly been used up to this point, which is basically as a more convenient place to keep a map. And they're hoping to create a new franchise by aformentioned Mario Kart 8, That's a change that promises to get them back to Nintendo-like profits by 2014... That is, if it is in fact a new franchise...

Out of Touch with the Internet

Nintendo didn't want Smash to be at EVO at all, and the news that the broadcast was canceled came after a compromise with the EVO officials to at least allow the tournament to take place without the stream. Once the internet found out about this, the negative outcry was so great that Nintendo allowed the game to be streamed.

"Games, Not Art"

Star Fox Adventures is the result of this trope. Originally, the game was to be called Dinosaur Planet and had no ties whatsoever with the Star Fox franchise. Krystal and a male fox were the main characters. But since Nintendo was behind schedule with a Star Fox sequel, they forced Rare into changing the plot and characters around. The male fox was axed, Krystal was aged up and became the Distressed Damsel, and Fox McCloud became the hero of a game that had little to do with what he does best: flying around in space and blasting bad guys. Suffice to say many fans of the franchise still hate this game — even though it's not a bad game per se. But the meddling didn't stop at the concept phase. A rushed release date caused what could have been a climactic boss fight with General Scales to be completely cut. But the cut is extremely unnatural and jarring: the fight actually has its own arena and intro cinematic, and the fight itself actually lasts a second or two before it gets called off, and the player is left confused and wanting.

Super Mario Galaxy had a story built around the game that didn't interfere with the gameplay and gave players an insight on Rosalina's history. Most players liked the concept. However, when the developers tried to do it again for Super Mario Galaxy 2, Shigeru Miyamoto himself stepped in and wanted the story aspect to be scrapped because he wanted the game to be more focused on the gameplay itself like the NES games had done.

If that's not enough, He did it again with Paper Mario Sticker Star, saying a story wasn't needed (even though the RPG games have always been more story-based than the platformers) and requesting that they only use existing Mario characters rather than coming up with new ones. He also felt the game played too much like Thousand Year Door, which led to the battle system being completely revamped. Unfortunately, after the Base Breaking Super Paper Mario, many fans were hoping for a game that returned to the style of the first two games, so Sticker Star was dismissed by us, the fans.

Even the Zelda series has been victim of Miyamoto's story-phobia. Ever since Ocarina Of Time, the developers have tried to include more complex and detailed stories, only to be forced to stop and simplify the plot, even excluding major plot points (the whole point of the story of Four Swords Adventures was being the backstory of A Link To The Past, an idea that had to be scrapped, with the final product taking place sometime after Twilight Princess in the game's timeline (in the Child Link timeline branch) and having nothing to do with A Link to the Past (which is in a completely different timeline branch), which caused the series to have an even more convoluted timeline. Link's Crossbow Training is probably the most tragic example: the developers wanted to develop a full-fledged, epic Zelda game that would be to Twilight Princess what Majora's Mask is to Ocarina of Time, but Miyamoto forbid them from including a epic story—or a story of any sorts, bosses (sans a single one that the developers were allowed to put in after fighting for it), or large and immersive stages. This resulted in what's widely considered the weakest installment in the series (not counting the licensed CD-i games) both by fans and critics alike. Also, because of people uploading the Subspace Emissary cutscenes from Super Smash Bros. Brawl onto the internet, there will be no story cutscenes in Super Smash Bros. for Wii U and 3DS.

There were many Franchises that were aborted for their Icons. There was a game "Fluff's Yarn", starred a totally new character, Fluff. When the game didn't seem to be turning out very well, Nintendo suggested turning it into a Kirby game which we all know as "Kirby's Epic Yarn" and if that's not enough, Kid Icarus Uprising originally wasn't planned to have anything to do with the Kid Icarus series. Nintendo and Sakurai were just working on a Nintendo 3DS action game involving sky and land combat when they suddenly realized that Pit would be the perfect character for such a title. And once upon a time, an original fighting game with new characters by the name "Dragon King" was in the works. When they brought in Sakurai, he knew that fighting games at the time did not sell very well, he had the idea of using Nintendo characters. That Idea became the Super Smash Bros. Franchise... <Let it Sink in...>

Iwata carefully explained his position on development and Nintendo's role as an entertainment company. Saying that Nintendo makes Games, and that Video Games are not Art. As you can see, He's flipping retarded and he must be destroyed, at all costs. I plan to organize a little resistance movement called the Disney Infinity Allegence Committee of Exploitation or DInACE for short. We plan to hurt your bottom line not because we dispise the folks who rescued the gaming industry. Of course not, we just want you to get better!

<TOM explains Criticism>

And since Iwata-san cant take criticisim we must excrute him from his post and there is only one man to do it... or rather, one mouse.

That's Right, If it isnt obvious by the Acronym, We here at project DInACE Aim to have the Walt Disney Company perchase Nintendo so that they can:

1. Remove Iwata from the Company and get some new blood up in management
2. Have Disney start a Japanese Branch that will begin the Aquisition of a grocery list of Japanese Studios
3. Have Nintendo rise from the ashes of corporate cynacism and make commercially viable games again!

Phase One: The Resistance

The first thing we have to do here is to redirect all Nintendo-Based Investments to Disney Infinity, hitting Nintendo where it hurts. We all accept trading in Nintendo Stocks for Disney Stocks, Here's the Current Exchange Rate as of this Video.

Disney: $ 63.96

Nintendo: $ 15.83

Stock Rate: Around Four

Be sure to check every stinkin' day, the more Nintendo stocks you sell, the lower it's stock prices are gonna be. Back to Disney Infinity, Ranting Robots Bleep and Bloop explain how to get rid of that pesky Wii U fund.

<Disney Infinity Costs>

There are also Power Discs sold in blind packs for around five bucks eaches so boom! The emptied carcass of your entire Wii U Fund burninated one disc at a time. More figures and discs will be coming down the pipe and there are even retailers dealing out exclusive toys for this thing so buy the smeg out of this game, say it's for your kids, bring your actual kids for bonus points, Just buy into this great game because let's face it:

<Infinity Cash Cow>

You can also resist by going to Magic Kingdom Hearts, a special event at Walt Disney World's Not Quite Scary Halloween Party, specifically for fans of other ongoing Disney crossover franchise Kingdom Hearts. So yeah, Neither me nor Deep Dish will be attending for we have our own business to attend to. But we'll do a monthly DInACE Direct where we here at Rebel Taxi give you Information that shall Aid DInACE...Directly. Expect a few special guests from time to time as we dive into the Derp of Iwata San's mind and rescue Nintendo. It'll be greatly appreciated if any one of us were to star in and co-write an episode of South Park, It'll give us some exposure as to who we are and why we will not tone it down...

Phase Two: The Offer

Iwata has stated he'll try to get the company back to Nintendo-like profits by 2014. So if we foil his promise then he'll have to cave in to our demands, It'll take months for the deal to become legally stable so yes, you guys can still have your Kingdom Hearts III...I Hope. We're aiming for a $6.4 Billion dollar deal both in Cash and Disney stocks like in the Lucasfilm Deal and it must have Iwata leaving the company to move on to crack $#!- and I know the perfect place where you can stay when the deal happens... <Hobo Joe>

Step Three: The Rebuild

So now that Disney owns Nintendo, what happens now to all it's assets and properties? Simple, we flat out port 'em over to our ultimate tool that saved the day, Disney Infinity! We get Avalanche to develop a Developer's Kit for their game and ship them to All the 1st and 2nd Party Developers Nintendo owns and relegate them to Disney Infinity because they'd be better off making figurines than developing for an obviously outdated console they've been selling at a loss since it's launch day. I have a Masterplan for all Nintendo Properties should they go through with the big deal. After Nintendo finishes it's final farewell to the Console Market, It will be developing Playsets for Mario and two tastes of the Zelda Franchise (Ocarina and Wind Waker) Intelligent Systems will cook up Playsets for each country in Fire Emblem alongside a better Paper Mario Game. Hal will develop Kirby and Ice Climbers Playsets with Project Sora helping out whilst it Develops a Kid Icarus Playset alongside Smash Bros. for Infinity. Retro Studios would develop Metroid and Donkey Kong Country Playsets, Game Freak has six regions of Pokémon to port over as well as a Possible Seventh to Ring in the new Tools. Speaking of which, The Pokémon Company can develop a Playset for Pokémon's Rumble and Mystery Dungeon Series. Mario Kart, Mario Party, Warioware, the list goes on. But when the well runs dry, We've got Toy Boxes to Polish and a big old treasure trove of stories to adapt for new Playsets and such.

Outro and Events

I would like to thank you for sitting through my evil scheme and I hope you guys can assist in the Events I have planned, There's Magic Kingdom Hearts in October just as I previously mentioned...Then the release of the X-Box One and PS4 will be an event we call "Deep Hurting" In we explain the evils of Nintendo in excruciating detail to Nintendo fans, what little they have left, and sway them to Playstation, X-Box, Mobile Games, PC, anything but Ninty and for every Major Release Nintendo's got in store, we have Boycotts set up too. Pokémon X and Y wll have 'Pistols for Pokémon' Mario 3D World will have 'Rehash Relief' because let's all agree on this one, It's just Mario 3D Land with more Catnip. The Wind Waker HD remake isn't gonna sell consoles so lets call this one 'Heroes of Gaming' in honor of the one true hero of time! And I am afraid that 'The Smashtacular Battle' will be a Super Smash Bros. boycott and there's also a Mario Kart Boycott called 'Sidetracked' and the real punch to the nads here will be 'Occupy Hyrule'. Now that I have officially ruined the night <Awolnation - Kill Your Heroes> and you guys can join said fight not just with Disney Infinity but also with these T-Shirts I plan to make for each occasion. If you love Nintendo and think it could be better then hop aboard Rebel Taxi vs. Nintendo bandwagon and put Iwata-san back in his place!

Fandom Arson

3/7/15

• Food Fight: For being flanderized beyond all recognition and overall redemption, we condemn Mrs Turner to being re-tought the basics of cooking by Miss Akane Tendo. For the overuse of two unfunny jokes solely for the purpose of padding out the episode, we condemn writer -- to eat the results of said cooking. For the stereotypical notion that Fairies act like pop-culture spouting genies, we condemn the characters of Cosmo and Wanda to being sealed up in a slime lamp and an Orange couch respectively for representing everything wrong with Nickelodeon.
• Love Struck: For the homophobic overtones in the special's rancid morals, we condemn director Sarah Frost to be re-incarnated as the head-redded Stepson of Sir Jonathan Test. For the over-the-top clishe interpretation of the men and women of the world, writer Steve Marmel is hereby condemned to be re-incarnated as a blatant lesbian magical girl created as an inept attempt at replicating the awesome that is Homura Akemi. For spreading misaimed sexual behavior, we condemn this show's interpretation of Cupid to witnessing the fairly oddmovies' interpretation of Timmy Turner watching Tootie leave his life forever, whether it be in rage or death.
• Cosmonopoly: For not overseeing the regulation process of Cosmonopoly, the toy company who okayed the distribution of the game is hereby condemned to be taken over by Hasbro. For invoking the Spongebob style of Continuity, we condemn the writers to be guests of honor at a Spongebill YouTube Poop festival. And for not realizing how much Cosmo had ruined Wanda's life with that brief stint of Vehicular Manslaughter, we condemn Billy Crystalball to an episode of This is your Wish featuring Baltor.
• It's A Wishful Life: For storyboarding the purging of the good Timmy's non-existance had blessec the world, we condemn storyboard artist Dave Thomas to five years working at my local Wendy's. For not using the character of Miss Smartenhott in the final draft, we condemn writer -- to --. And for imagining Timmy Turner into existence, We condemn Butch Hartman, I mean: Number 1 to Solitary.

5/4/15

• Tentacollino: For keeping innocent lives away from their loved ones for the rest of time, King Ree is condemned to having the face of notorious Spongebob writer Zeus Cervas in my upcoming CGI sequel of Tentacollino. For trying and failing to recapture the same class of crazy as -rapper dog-'s rap solo in Titanic: The Legend Goes On, we condemn Cletus Razorteeth to become a main cast member of The Fairly OddParents from Season Twelve onward. And for Team Titanic, oh... You get the best punishment for a group with an ending such as yours. See, with your newfound immortality, you cannot grow old to tell your bastardized version of the tale of the Titanic, and without your crazy-arse framing device both movies are seemingly impossible. So you are condemned to helping the development of Los Angeloto on your fruity little Island so that the Doctor can have a badass parking space.

Fandy Handy Dandy Guide Reverse: The Time Traveler's Guide to 2013

Step 1: Those Kooky Hipsters

They like their bands hot before they're cool, so they blog it for the mainstream to see, just keep in mind that these hipsters might be Cultural Authoritarians in the later 2010s, so it's best to keep potential offspring from happening.

Step 2: Party Hardy

The Dark Knight Rises is a popular movie during the summer of this particular year and has naturally spawned a memorable villain, specifically for being a laughing stock in some way, shape or form... In this case, Bane's easily imitable voice.

Step 3: Time Lord Troubles

This is the year Matt Smith jumps ship from the Steven Moffat Lovey-Dovey Crazy Train of a Soap Opera Doctor Who has sadly become at this point in time. So whatever you do, do not spoil Peter Capaldi! Or else ripple effect-related bad vibes are gonna happen.

Step 4: 50 Shades of Lame

Stephanie Mayer's a Kinky little Cougar and an outright obsessive bitch, so avoid her at all costs unless you like the idea being the next shag puppet in her novels. And to be safe, run from anyone who considers 50 Shades of Grey as a work of literature.

Step 5: Star Trek into Yaoi

J.J. Abrams is known as the man who revived Star Trek, Star Wars, and Lyrical Nanoha. But the former of these three franchises were penned by the fuckers behind the Michael Bay Era of the Transformers Franchise and we all know its tied with the Xehanort Saga as one of the most intellectually bankrupt initial eras of a popular franchise ever to grace geek culture.

-Comic-

The answer, of course, is 9/11 Truther propaganda!

Step 6: Waifu Warzone

This is where Fire Emblem explodes in popularity due to the implantation of a Casual Mode, Shipping, Time Travelling Children who act as extra troops, Shipping, DLC featuring the three Smash Bros. Veterans of the Series, Shipping, and Avatar Customization... But mostly Shipping!

Step 7: Twerk it Hard

This is a fad that will be gone by 2020... that is, if you don't manage to fuck it up while you're stranded here! But the longer you recognize it as a thing kids today are probably doing makes you even more disgusted with the world with each passing recall.

Step 8: A Pokemon World

So the world leaders are gathered together in one place to discuss policies, refine trade agreements, and battle pokemon apparently.

Fandy Handy Dandy Guide Reverse: The Time Traveler's Guide to 2014

Fandy Handy Dandy Guide Reverse: The Time Traveler's Guide to 2015

How I'd Fix Sword Art Online

1: Fleshing Out the Game

Let’s make one thing perfectly clear, Aincrad is bland, repetitive and empty as Shit. No magic, no jobs, no long-range attacks, just a few axes and maces scattered across the many swords in the game. No gameplay variety whatsoever, you’re just a mook with a sword for Light Novel Boy to mow down in his travels. Without the cheap, VR gimmick in place, guys like Yahtzee, Jim Sterling, Angry Joe among others will tear it asunder as the Shittiest game of 2022. That proves that the writer knows jack shit about the golden rule: Show, don’t tell. Henceforth, I shall be fleshing out the systems of the Game.

Magic System: Elemental Spells, Status Buffs, You can enchant weapons with a weapon leveling system.

Other Weapons include guns, bows, whips, nunchucks, sai, tonfa, keyblades and all that shi-

Job System: Name as many final fantasy classes as you can.

And finally, a new feature called the Party System.

2: Party System

The Party System will be a huge incentive for

3: Asuna

4: Kirito

5: Tentacle Porn

Tentacle Rape.

Stop.

6: A Balanced Cast

7: The Premise

How I'd Fix Sailor Moon

6: Time Shenanigans

Let's not fool ourselves, Time Travel Stories are inherently impossible to get right, even the best out of any of the lot have their share of problems. Dragon Ball Z's Android Arc portrayed time travel perfectly in that time travel just does not happen but it's an alternative universe instead. So, we're just going to scrap the time travel aspect of Sailor Moon's lore altogether!

MARVEL VS DC: The Other Guys

Anakin: Hi! I'm a Lucas!

Mickey: And I'm...Confused as all hell? Anakin, what the hell is this-

Anakin: Hot Dog, was January a great month for movies like last January's 'Strange Magic' or what!?

Mickey: What! But that movie bombed at the box office!

Anakin: At least it ain't a Michael Bay Joint! {13 Hours}

Mickey: Seriously, Anakin, you're scaring me here!

Anakin: Of course I remember the Revenant! Why would I forget?

Mickey: You're not willing to talk to me unless I play along, huh?

Anakin: I have a date with a senator, some skittles, and a {The Boy} Six-Year-Old Boy

Mickey: Ugh, please master Jedi Skywalker, tell us what other films await us in January...

Anakin: {Ride Along 2} I wanna die, too!

Mickey: Of course you would feel that after watching {Norm of the North} Rob Schider Cartoons all day.

Anakin: At least it wasn't a gritty Hollywood remake of Uncle {Dirty-} Grandpa!

Mickey: Come on, I was just asking you to go see Kung Fu Panda 3, DreamWorks Really needs the Help.

Anakin: Not as much help as The 5th Wave's gonna need!

(Spiderman and Iron Man are sitting there, watching the mess go down.)

Spiderman: Geez, Tony... How long are they gonna keep this up?

Iron Man: Bout half an hour? Why?

Spiderman: Oh, my god...

Iron Man: Happy third anniversary of the Disney Infinity Announcement.

Spiderman: And Many Mooooore...

HDG-R: What to Expect Smash 5

Opening Comic

Thesis

Step One: Time to Cut the Cheese

Clones are often a No-No when building a Smash Game, so We'll be cutting Lucina and Dark Pit. Capcom's having its share of troubles so we might as well say goodbye to Ryu and Rocky Here... But there's always DLC, am I Right?

Step Two: The comeback Kids

People all over are super pissed that this O'Donnel Chap didn't make it back to Smash 4...

(Squirtle and Young Link Confirmed)

Step Three: This Stage is Just too Small

Ridley deserves a seat in the Roster like the Fine Brothers deserve Subscribers. The fact of the Matter is that if you try scaling him down, then all the fun of the guy would be lost... If you want a Rep for Metroid, I think I know a guy or two...

(Adam Malcovich and Space Marines)

Step Four: Gotta Catch 'Em All!

Step Five: Trophy Tussle

Step Six: Tentpole Overdose

Last time, Mario got two newcomers and a returning Vet. Now its the Zeldaverse's Turn in the limelight. Ghirahim and Demise for Skyward Sword, Young Link for Majora's Mask and for Windwaker, we have...

(Tetra in a realistic bod.)

Step Seven: New Tentpole Overdose

Step Eight: Can't Beat the Classics

Do you know what I miss in gaming, Fellow Kids?

(DK Jr. Confirmed)

Step Nine: Spinning Off the Deep End

Smash Underground

Smash Bros. Underground

Shorts

Thesis

Shorts is a magnificent butterfly of corny CGI and Adam West Batman-grade writing produced by Robert Rodriguez, director of one of the Spy Kids movies and Adventures of Shark Boy and Lava Girl. I got it at my Local Library when I went to renew my card there, and hopefully, the whole tradition of me reviewing random flicks I find at the Library on my monthly visits to Memere's will probably stick, I guess. It's about the wonders of childhood and how technology is kind of eating away at it, I guess... So it's up to a magical macguffin to tie us all back together! A moral you can find at the butt of a cereal box, how forfilling... Let's just get started.

Episode Zero: The Blinkers

The Movie begins with a segment with these two characters who have a stare contest and they go about their day during said competition, goin' to school, playing outside, playing inside, even sleeping with their freaking eyes open. I-Is this even safe? Are there going to need medical attention after this? The one time that it ends, they don't know who won so they keep it going throughout the entire rest of the goddamn movie.

Prologue

So, yeah. It's called Shorts because the film is told in little episodes shown 'Completely Out of Order', a novel type of storytelling, almost like a kiddie-version of Pulp Fiction. I guess I have to introduce you to the cast now, init. Jimmy Bennett plays 'Toe' Thompson, a lonely excuse for a human being and predictably the main character. Lug and Loogie, the Bulk and Skull characters who have a nack for treasure because movie. Helvanka, the Snooty rich girl you find in every form of media that has a school in it. Jake Short plays a germaphobe and also Steve Mobs is in this. The way he pitted a man and his wife against each other to come up with a big feature to edge out the competition. I have purchased myself a Purple Pyramid specifically to spite the man! So let's get this tube started, shall we?

Episode 2: Alien8ed

You have clicked on the first short to be showcased in the movie, Alien8ed, where we meet 'Toe' Thompson himself and his goofy braces which I can't afford since the corporate establishment running the political oligarchy doesn't want to pay for our healthcare. Also, turns out his parents are the captains of the opposing research teams, tightly tying it back to the bloody Black Box right alongside Mobs' young son Cole Black and daughter Helvetica.

Helvetica: because I hate you?

Toe: Because you love me. <Tsundere>

<FUCK THIS MOVIE>

Then she stuffs the kid into a trash can... twice. We get a scene with the blinkers where one kid offers him life advice and a Reeses Nutrageous Bar... out of infinity. Also, Cole overhears his narration and promptly chases him to a construction site where the bullies try to stone the smeg out of them. And this is where we first see the Rainbow Rock that inspired me to create an anime concept where Never Fairies shift to human size to become Xorcerers I guess and fight wish monsters or something. He wishes for friends and it triggers first contact with an alien species, One that can fit inside his backpack but still, their UFO vehicles use their tiny tractor beams to cook a gourmet buffet I would love to help myself to if the budget allowed me to... After a scene with the parents, we get to see a room cleaning montage that acts as a showcase of how far we've come since Disney's own Mary Poppins before the aliens move on to fix up his teeth. But not before we see the sister barking at her loser boyfriend, she makes a wish that will clearly bite us in the ass later. Toe squares off with the bullies on the following day, and delivers a prompt dunking to Helvetica before chemistry class.

Helvetica: Where are your braces?!

Toe: Up my nose.

{GET DUNKED ON!}

We get a rather hilarious bit of a Chemistry class scene, alien metalheads, Helvetica eating a failfish right out a fishtank, infinite Nutrageous bar kid shows up again, and the two twerps survive a fall that probably might have killed them in real life... I think this is a precursor to Sharknado. During their recovery in detention, Helvetica eats chicken noodle soup... with her feet. Holy Fuck, it is a Sharknado prequel.

Also Mr. Black intends to fire Toe's parents at the costume party because evil. If you want to see how that turns out, click on Mum and Dad. If you want to know how this shitstorm of a plot started, click on Infinite Nutrageous kid and his brothers.

Episode 1: The Wishing Rock

You've clicked on the first short in the movie's chronological order, The Wishing Rock. We start on a rainy day while Infinite Nutrageous kid is playing video games with his brothers, but he's bored out of his mind so it's outside they go... The storm having cleared up in Black Falls upon his suggestion. The trio make their way to the wishing rock at the end of a rainbow. This kid named Lougie wishes for an endless supply of candy and so begins the tale of Infinite Nutrageous Kid. His opening act is wishing up a Fortress, but the three fuck it up and loose the rock in the canyon of doom that was also wished up by Loogie, where a crocodile eats the rock and wishes for evolution... okay. Then they're 'Rescued' by a Pterodactyl, huh. And he wishes for... Telephonesis, Wut!?

Luckily Loogie wishes themselves home and wishes that one of them was Super Smart: Baby Lisa, who can now communicate with people with her mind. So the kids catapult the rock out of here before the idea for world peace crossed their minds... As baby Lisa put it, they'd find a way to screw it all up. This leads to Episode 2 and all the craziness that follows, so if you want to see a short that actually happened in the movie, click on the dork with glasses. But if you want to see a short that clearly didn't happen, click on Baby Lisa.

Episode 2.5.: Super Spurts

You've dived balls first into my fictional Short, 'Super Spurts' It starts with Infinite Nutrageous Kid and his brothers asking Lisa for lottery numbers since she was wished into being super-smart enough to see the future. She finds the wishing rock under her seat by wishing she was old enough to handle a Mr Potato Head, being aged up into a four year old by sitting on a magical rock. How inappropriate.

Lisa crawls a bit then waddles a bit, ages herself up again to Loogie's age to ratchet her walk to a sprint, which leads to her jumping through a window... which means nothing because she wishes that she could fly upon the jump. She has a brief chat with Toe upon his kind dunking Helvetica, telling him that revenge will get him nowhere but 'six feet underneath a hole in the ground'. She wishes for super strength when she has to look for something that some guy's missing, and a martial arts tournament

Episode 4: Big Bad Booger

GHOSTBUSTERS (2016)

2016's Ghostbusters is the worst movie ever. It's a full on centerpiece of the worst aspects of female-centric Reboots on par with Jane Foster becoming Thor, and the cast and crew are just the most generic paint-by-numbers worksuits hired onto a project simply to just 'Get it Done.' Penned as a sort of soft reboot where the events of the franchise happened, but they've faded into obscurity by ghost activity drying up or something, Yeah. That's what you get for not franchising at the end of the first movie, you lugnuts! So now we have a new team of Ghostbusters consisting of four independent young women, an engineer, a psychologist, a mathematician and a negro minstrel show with coltish legs and a Tyler Perry movie for a mouth. She is the worst character in the whole movie, her actress is a self-entitled whore whom I hope shall go to hell before she dies. But I'm getting ahead of myself, let's dig into the juicy stuff, shall we.

Amy Paskel, once the CEO of Sony Pictures at the time, always wanted an all girl ghostbuster movie being the #Messiah Slave that she is, and flogged it to any director that could take it, Director Paul Fieg only signed on if he would be given creative freedom over it. Emma Stone, Amy Shumer among others were eyeballed, but all they could get alongside Mellissa McCarthy from the scraps of SNL were Kristen Wigg, Leslie Jones and Kate McKennen. Two of which I never heard of until this movie, though I wish I could forget about the formermost one... Things were going smoothly despite the signs that it just shouldn't be. But then the Sony hacking hit the film division, leaking as many eMails as possible which revealed corruption of superiors and their bigotry towards their pawns. Paskel was fired and replacement Tom Rothman cut the budget by several millions right the fuck before filming, and the disaster scenario being recounted and showcased on 4chan in the same manner as Green Lantern and Fant-4-Shame for all to see...

Boy who Would be Queen v Just the Two of Us

Bionicle Legends of Metru Nui

Legends of Metru Nui is fucking awesome and that's a rarity for sequels.

Exchange Student Zero

DeeP DiSH: This year marks the 20th anniversary of an Iconic Monster Collecting series that influenced a generation, touched countless lives, and brought people of all races together... I am of course talking about Battle Day Zero! (thnx 5 watching)

Dr Eggman's Tomato Sauce

Last Week, I reviewed a Sonic Boom Episode that was actually good enough to swipe the top spot from BDFF. Try to wrap your head around that logic... Then again, Dino Posse's fucking horrible, so what do I know? Today, However, we're gonna blow that episode out of the water!

Having made its debut two episodes prior, Dr Eggman's Tomato Sauce was an episode my co-writer Robbie Walker has begged me to review since we started homing in our attacks on the show to begin with, and I figured I might as well get my piece out there since it is one of the few episodes Random actually enjoyed.

Recap

We begin our episode with Tails installing a stereo in his Plane.

Knuckles: Do you wuv your plane, Tails, do you wuv it!?

Well, Tails does need a helping hand to, y'know, work the shaft if he needs to.

Tails agrees to follow Sonic and his crew, but only to collect more parts for his Plane, and guess who they find selling Tomato Sauce.

Eggman: <Boasting>

Sonic: This isn't good...

So Sonic does his thing, but Eggman states that the Sauce isn't part of any evil scheme.

Eggman: (Tries his Sauce) See, It's Harmless and Delicious. You Try.

Sonic: I think I'll pass.

Oh, It's one of those episodes!

Eggman: I think I found Sonic the Hedgehog's weakness: He's Afraid of Tomato Sauce!

Actually, it's that Sonic cannot swim for beans, but that's not really the point here, point is his taste buds are taken for a ride and Tails goes to analyze for any devious tricks eggman might have up his sleeves based solely on assumption. And you all know the saying Robbie says about those things.

Sonic's watch appears to be on the fritz as well as Knux's Headphones, Amy's Artifact Tracker, Sticks' Flashlight and Tails' Plane. I wonder why?

<Eggman on the Comedy Chimp Show>

Well, I've heard worse career challenges for supervillains. (Donald Trump)

But it turns out it's not the sauce that he's using in his scheme, but the cans containing them, That's actually pretty intriguing!

<Sticks being Sticks>

Just wait til you see Sonic Dream Collection.

Predictably, Sonic and his crew manage to fend off the bots for a bit, But Tails starts to choke when he sees his plane... because of course he would. Tails tries to talk it out of the whole 'killer machine' thing... but... Take it, Michael Bein

<It cannot be reasoned with.>

Sonic and Company show up sans Tails to Square off against Eggman with a fancy new junk robot. Tails struggles to regain control and Sonic and Company struggle to tear apart the mech as it keeps pulling itself together

Eggman: Face it, ya blue blockhead, I've got this one in the bag!

Tails flies in to snatch the remote and deactivate Eggman's modifications.

<The final scene of the episode>

Conclusion

This episode is actually the closest to the whole action-adventure angle the show advertises itself towards that I've seen in the .7 years we've been reviewing this show. The choirography of the fight sequence was decent, the jokes hit hard and fast, the characterization's top notch and you can easily say that Alan Denton and Greg Hahn have proven themselves to be the best fit for the Sonic Franchise going forward. It doesn't grind to a halt like Late Fees or decicrate continuity like Tails' Crush, this is an episode that was made by people who, y'know, actually care about these characters! Why is it so hard to find people who care nowadays? (Politics of Marketing) Oh, yeah, that's why.

You know, speaking of Fans, There's this fanmake of a particularly terrible episode we reviewed one which was the death knell for the Sonic Franchise. And he's offered to be a guest on whoever's willing to get it out there! What a guy! Too bad I don't have a sort of soapbox to kinda express my emotions towards a particular subject I like and/or dislike.

Roger: Oh, Hey there!

(Glares at TV Screen)

Oh, cool. I actually have one of those, that's nice.

Size Matters

So, Yeah. I have just now realized that now was the time

Late Fees Rogerified

The Sonic Fandom has been a well of creativity on par with MLP, Steven Universe, and just recently, Undertale. But back to Sonic, one of it's biggest contributers and harshest critics is Roger Van der Wilde!

Renowned for his Disected series where we details whatever details he finds off about the Sonic Franchise... or japanese media as a whole, Roger's a pretty entertaining fellow to hang out with and toss around ideas.

Once Upon a Townsville

Opening Skit

DeeP DiSH: How nice of you to lend your talents to Team Plasma, Victor Vivisector. As the highest leautenant to the very captain of its current flying lair, our talents have worked non stop to defeat our most notorious target: a group of Andillites that shift from between Pokemon and Human Forms. The Seven Sabres, they are called. We've already had one of them time out in her Human Form, rendering her a Nothlit. Now all that's left is to destroy the others and the Andillite posing as their trainer.

Krump: So, we gonna get in their way? Fight em off or sumthin'?

DeeP DiSH: Actually, You're supposed to keep any sort of backup from coming to her aid, like Mimi who's flying in on a Skarmory as we speak.

Hip Hop: And If the Furry Force is on the Prowl?

Vivisector: Morsels compared to my latest creation: The Scaley Squad!

Hip Hop: Hope you're saving those crackers specificly for those overgrown critters, man. Anyone else wouldn't be as comfortable with fighting a dragon with junk like that. Hell, he won't even stop rubbin'!

Vivisector: Ugh, Hopefully, they'll just wipe each other out.

Krump: And after that, we can take the forest of both the worlds we're connecting here and turn them all into beautiful parking lots, right.

Vivisector: Nope, Probably just get a regular job, I'm not even a bad guy anymore, I just want the Furry Force to be dead!

FF Clip 0:27-0:47

DeeP DiSH: I know, Dude, I know, a whole smegton of toxic musk turns the whole world into fucking furries, everybody drowns in a sea of wolf cum and I am required to sit through an episode of the Powerpuff Girls Reboot.

-Thesis-

DeeP DiSH: Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, time to riot loose with a Fandom Arson of Powerpuff Girls 2016 Variety: Episode 17: Once Upon a Townsville. Belts Up, Vivisector?

Vivisector: It's too Big, Ugh, the tip is so red.

DeeP DiSH: Too Bad, Loser, We're about to land.

Recap

The episode begins in a faraway fairytale world where the first new character from the Powerpuff Reboot is fleeing from a dragon, Begging for a Prince that will clearly never come.

(0:32-0:38) DeeP DiSH: Dear Christ, you're going to be one of those princesses, are you?

She falls into a magic well and into Buttercup's Arms. After a sound thrashing of the aformentioned Dragon, the Princess, named Bluebell, shows irritation towards the person who she just- Oh God! Bad Touch! Send him in!

<Singing>

This is litterally someone singing her own made up lyrics over a freaking Disney Song! Belle's Song, to be more precise. This has got to be one of the most shameless pieces of Plagerism I've ever seen! It's amazing that Disney isn't watching this show, They'd sue their asses on the spot!

(3:28 - 3:35) DeeP DiSH: STOP! Just spit it out alright?

(3:50 - 4:06) DeeP DiSH: Actually, I think that's a metafore, a pretty shallow excuse for equally shallow behavior in the shape of a metafore but a metafore none the less...

So yeah, she keeps tossing herself in mortal danger in order to beckon her prince forward to her side. Even trying to dunk herself into a volcano before the Powerpuffs try to teach her the lesson of the episode: Being that you should be able to do whatever you want with your life beyond just waiting for something to happen.

DeeP DiSH: And how exactly do they express this lesson when it's clear she's dull as a sack of hammers?!

(5:10-5:22) DeeP DiSH: *Expression of Disgust.*

(5:25-5:41) DeeP DiSH: It can't get worse, this fucking hit job we've got cannot get any worse! (Alarms are blareing) What just happened to make it worse?!

Krump: Uh, Boss. There's a Pokemon zooming up there.

DeeP DiSH: Then try scanning her into the global Pokedex?

Hip-Hop: We tried that, but that piece of Plasma Junk can't find her.

DeeP DiSH: Then put it on screen. Cambot, can we at least get a stock image on the display screen (Looks at the screen to find a Lunala) My god, It's the fallen Andalite, Impossible, she's gone nothlit and yet she still manages to morph a Lunala!

Krump: Then that means that they aren't really andalites at all, right?

DeeP DiSH: Certainly, who else wouldn't get stuck in their pokemon morph when the morpher was a pokemon right from the start! (Is knocked off his seat by an impact)

Vivisector: Oh, My God! She Breached the Hull!

DeeP DiSH: We can't let a Lunala get here when their tech's two regions behind, They'll be walking into a slaughterhouse! Hip Hop, Krump, Attack!

<Hip Hop and Krunk Kill themselves>

(6:00) Also, Nice Disney Reference to the one that charted the course of evolution for the Animation industry you insensitve dick holes!

She's dead fucking set on being rescued by a prince to the point where she's delighted to see the dragon come back.

(6:57-7:00) DeeP DiSH: And clueless to boot.

(7:00-7:07) DeeP DiSH: Me neither... Knowing what this is going to set up, Bluebell here's got no choice but to... Oh no.

(7:14-7:16) DeeP DiSH: Sweet lord, No!

(7:19-7:31) DeeP DiSH: WHYYYYYYYYY?!

Repurposing 'Make a Man out of You' to your sexist self-objectification is not a way to make you endearing, Bluebell! In fact, that makes you an insult to all of Disney's Efforts to break those molds over the past few decades! You go to your room, Show, until you know what real satire is like!

(7:58-8:14) DeeP DiSH: Aiming for those Legasus Glutes, I see.

The Prince finally shows up again, but it turns out she is completely over the fool and leaves him in the dust to start her life independantly.

(8:55-9:10) DeeP DiSH: Smooth Fucking Move, Tenesson. (A Reference to Yuri Lowenthal)

Conclusion

Why the fuck hasn't Disney Sued their asses for this shit! Is it the parodic lyrics, is it the design conforming to Clarence's art style like the rest of the characters?! What is it about your abuse of animation as an art form that's allowed you to get away with being a shallow parody of what's popular? That's what it is, This show is nothing more than the exact personification of Tumblr from the memes to

Lion: You see, Vivisector, This is why we must teach the Scalely Squad compassion, So that we don't-

Vivisector: Fuck That! (Kills the Crocodile as DeeP DiSH Tramples on the Velociraptor)

DeeP DiSH: (Calls Ghetsis)

Ghetsis: Hello?

DeeP DiSH: Yeah, Ditto. Remember that whole 'manipulate Team Plasma into getting a Pokemon-Trainer Duo to sacrifice on both universes to ressurrect Demon King Demise' thing.

Ghetsis: Yes, my master, I am listening.

DeeP DiSH: Good, because we're angling to make the sacrifice of the other world be that universe's N and his Zoroa. How about you, V?

Vivisector: Just to be safe, I'm gonna burn this place down with all of us in it!

DeeP DiSH: So, Call back when you're the other half of Demon King Demise! Bye. *Hangs up* So, Wanna go to grillby's?

Vivisector: You're buying, right?

DeeP DiSH: Totes.

(Credits) And that concludes the final broadcast of the Cosby Comet, While we face the imminant combination of this world and the world of the original nuzlocke, make sure to click on our other videos if you want to see more of our shenanagans, like favorite comment and subscribe if you're a conformist, follow us on social media if you feel so inclined and hey! if you like what we do and want to see more of it, hop on over to our patreon page and drop a few dollars our way. Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, Thanks for RiOTing Loose with our Fandom Arson and until all are one, Good Fight, Good Night and remember, I'm DeeP DiSH... And I welcome Death!

Don't Judge Me

And now that you know how network meddling can fuck over a show. The episode we're talking about an episode that can rival franchise death nail Late Fees in terms of Shittiness whilst also reminding me of an episode which uses the exact same premise but much better. With that said, ladies and gentlemen of the Mob, time to RiOT loose with a Fandom Arson of Sonic Boom Episode 17: Don't Judge Me. Belts Up, Gang! We're about to land.

Recap

1:26 And You will not believe how Eggman worms his way out of this one.

1:27-1:34 *Facepalm* Dude, you are a worse actor than Adam Sandler, I can't believe that I'd actually be willing to say that...

2:17-2:28 There are words to describe how wrong this is, but I'm going to save it for the conclusion.

3:26-3:38 I can't believe it, this is actually more biassed than the Trial in Sonichu No.10, Oh god, something surpassed Sonichu in Shittiness.

4:00-4:10 Instead we have Knux. And thus, yet another nail in the coffin of Sega.

5:30-5:38 *Facepalm* You know what this reminds me of, Bubsy the Bobcat. You know, that Mascot that went nowhere designed by a video game dev that went nowhere. Yeah, he's the guy that appeared in progressively worse games, handled terribly in all of them, and he could never shut up no matter how much we all despised him. And thinking about Sonic after the genesis days, Barring a few rises in quality like the Dreamcast Trilogy post Sonic Adventure and the Hedgehog Engine Games like Unleashed, Colors and Generations... he's appeared in progressively worse games, handled terribly in almost all of them, and he never shuts the hell up! So we've got Bubsy ripping off Sonic only for Sonic to Rip off Bubsy. Market Research Inbreeding: Its where integrity and consistency go to die!

6:30-6:44 Hence why Eggman probably hired him for a lot of his politican-buying money.

6:55-7:09 Meh, I've seen better.

8:16 Careful Knux, you're testing Sonic's Patience and if you cause what I think you're gonna cause, I'm going to pull out a video to show fans what you're supposed to be!

8:16-8:32 Ugh, Go watch Knux's Episode in DiGi's Character Analysis 'Who Dat?' and leave comments as to how terrible his decay as a character has gotten over the duration of this god-forsaken franchise!

8:42-8:46 Eat a Dick Orbot.

10:56-10:58 Took the words out of my mouth CC.

Conclusion

Horrible Mistakes

For this one, I have to dig deep into the archives. Like, 'Earliest Arson Ever Produced' Deep. That's right, the similar episode we're talking about here is 'Krabs vs. Plankton' from the First show we ever aimed our scythe towards: SpongeBob Squarepants.

Our First Drop of evidence comes in with the crashing of the mothbot. In there, Plankton was taking the idea of being in pain (or pretending to), because he heard a customer saying he would sue Mr. Krabs, which gave him the idea of doing so to get the Krabby Patty Secret Formula. Why? Because Plankton slipped on the Wet Floor without any sight of a wet floor sign. The ironic thing is that when Mr. Krabs hired a lawyer being prepared for the trial, the lawyer slipped on the wet floor and actually got himself hurt. "WHOOPS!" Here, Eggman had no reason to fake the injury (shows Eggman in a neck brace) other than to make himself look like an idiot.

At least with KvP, He was too damn small for anybody to see right away, hence why Plankton

{Plankton: [whispering] I'll give you one last chance. I'll drop the charges if you give me the formula.

Mr. Krabs: [yelling] Never, you little runt! [The court audience gasps]

Plankton: [dramatically] Oww, oww! My wittle arm! [audience gasps]

Mr. Krabs: What? No. I didn't lay a claw on him.

Plankton: Oww! My other arm! [audience gasps]

Mr. Krabs: He's lying! Bah!}

However, Mr. Krabs has to go along with the case, because he has to defend himself until there's evidence.

"Don't Judge Me", on the other hand, had nothing to believe to the crowd that Sonic is harming Eggman by accident. It would've been funny if Sonic had a restraining order and cops attacked him, like in the Cartoon Network Shortie: HarrassCat (0:45 - 1:00) But NO, Bill wanted to make a boring court case.

Now compare the 'Evidence' from Don't Judge Me to the evidence from KvP, Sheldon brings in a visualized piece of evidence to prove his point.

Plankton: [presents a "wet floor" sign to Mr. Krabs] Mr. Krabs, can you identify this item?

Mr. Krabs: It's a "wet floor" sign.

Plankton: Do you own one?

Mr. Krabs: Uhh...well...umm...No, I don't. [everyone gasps] No, no! You don't understand! I had to make some tough business decisions and the sign seemed so superfluous?

Court Audience: Guilty. Guilty, guilty, guilty.

Plankton: No more questions.

With Sonic Boom's "Don't Judge Me", there's nothing to prove whether Sonic is Guilty or not! Hell, MatPat of Game Theory, even with all the hits and misses he often makes throughout his career, thought he was bad at doing his job... but at least from the start, he had some visuals to prove his point! And he just made a video about how Night Howlers were connected to Drugs! When you make MatPat look like the better presentator, you that something is wrong.

But the final comparison comes with how the heroes handle the situation. At least with Krabs VS. Plankton, the Krabby Patty Formula gave into Plankton's temptation of greed, lust, and gluttony. Heck, even the most famous of Court Cases, King Kong VS. Donkey Kong, had Nintendo as the Defendant and Universal as the Plaintaff; yet Universal lost, because they were in the wrong! Sonic Boom failed miserably because they don't care about Sonic's side of the story, and there was no Plot MacGuffin in the series for them to u- OH WAIT A MINUTE! YOU JUST MADE THE CHAOS CRYSTALS IN RISE OF LYRIC!!!! WHY DIDN'T YOU MAKE EGGMAN REALIZE HOW POWERFUL THEY ARE, OR MAKE SONIC AND HIS FRIENDS THE NEW GUARDIANS?!? And no, I'm not going to bother with the rest of episode anymore, because... {ISNT IT ALL POINTLESS}

Final Words

And that's only the comparison to one episode, think about Sonic Heroes and how much better it was with characterization, think about A Truman Scorned and how the solution was more creative than just 'Roboviolence', Think about JBX and how at least the lunacy of having Simon the Digger on the Director's Chair led to something interesting. Think about, yes, Freiberger's own Drawn Together and how it was at least more energetic in its shittiness. It's clearly one of, if not the worst Sonic Boom Episode we've reviewed thus far. You want to know why this episode deserves a good thrashing? My coworker, Robbie Walker, wasted his time on it, during the Men's Retreat in 2015, when he should've been focusing on God. He felt that because he was going to miss it at home, he should try showing it to the guys in the at gathering. After watching it by the time Eggman faked his injury, Robbie could not take it, but had to sit through it THE WHOLE... DAMN... EPISODE!!! It's as worse as Late Fees.

So the Dino Posse's turning this wild ride around with two terrible episodes from the Boom Catalogue. Will this keep their footprint on the Top Three after two of the good ones ganged up on 'em these past couple of weeks, tune in next week, Same Smash Time, Same Smash Channel, Back to you, Freeza.

Freeza: Zarbon, didn't your nephew fake an ailment to sue the school board for feeding him stuff he didn't like and didn't I come over to blow the entire school to smetherines for its trouble?

Zarbon: Ah! Yeeesss... (Sobbing)

Freeza: Still Ahead, The Glitter Force and their Precure comrades in Japan, we'll tell you how stupid the 'Glitter Force' name is after this.

Top 10 Reasons to Stuff Kingdom Hearts into Homestuck

Ditch Doze

(A3I Part 1)

What kind of person can say slowing down time for yourself is awesome power with a straight face? Think about it, think about it, Exactly! Hence why we need to swap out Doze with a new guy with a new power like, say preserving your existence when your past self has been killed off.

(Science Man explain the Terminator Timeline)

Maybe by this replacement touching future stuff with it's body, they won't get erased when the timeline edits itself upon its past self gets removed from its post. I dunno, just get rid of Doze

(A3I Clip)

Retcon Trolls

(Clip of the Trolls being the Trolls)

The trolls are one of the best alien creatures ever to be blessed with the gift of intelligent life. Taking Internet troll archetypes and molding an ecclesiastical cast of dynamic characters is no easy task especially when plenty of them have traits that make them outright unlikeable, Andrew Hussie should be commended for his efforts even though only three out of twelve remained alive to the end.

(Insert Troll getting Killed)

A solution would be to use Die's Voodoo Doll to warp themselves to a timeline where all the Trolls made it out okay akin to how the Felt bounced back from being dead in the fifth intermission of Act 6. We have the Technology

(More Troll Things)

Artificial Identities

(Young Xehanort)

Let's not fool ourselves, most of the original characters are absolutely wooden, Xehanort is right about Light and Darkness needing to co-exist in perfect balance, the conflict is racist and outright meaningless, and the mystery aspect that ties it all together is absolute bullshit.

(Demyx's Death)

How do you negate a convoluted mess that has stuffed time travel into in an effort to remain relevant, you completely negate its existence by saying the events and characters are digital ingredient to create a cosmic eraser for Lord English and thus, they don't really exist or even matter.

(Family Guy Reference)

Retconning the Kingdom Hearts Mythos to being mere fiction means that the Kingdom Hearts cast can be reborn when the Homestuck cast recreates the universe, the shallow personalities of 70% of the cast make a lot more sense, and the Heartless, Nobodies, Unversed and Dream Eaters are reduced to a singular category of Monst-no, Puppets, because that's what they're programmed to be: Grind Fodder.

(Level Grinding in Kingdom Hearts)

Sometimes we need a clean slate.

(Xemnas speaking)

Character Prototyping

A Victory for the Midnight Crew

(0:00 - 0:47 A3I Part 1)

I just love it when the politics of mobster rivalries come into play, especially when we get allies as glovely as the Midnight Crew. Having asserted themselves in the Intermission between Acts 3 and 4, they've become as well known as the iconic Trolls but with a less prominent fanbase.

(4:02 - 5:25 A3I Part 1)

Spades Slick has obviously been through too much just to be tossed aside like that in Collide, didn't he promise to take down english himself, and speaking of 'ol English.

(3:15-3:33 A3I-Part 4)

The Fall of English

(0:00-0:10 Paradox Space: Horse Play)

Another one of the things I find dissatisfaction with was the uncertain outcome of Lord English, like we get a peek at the utopia they build, but it stops without even bringing up Lord English's fate. Personally, I've thought up the perfect way to kill him off, Erase Caliborn from existance ala Doris from Meet the Robinsons.

(That Scene)

Severely weakened by the erasure of his past self but preserved via having Biscuits stuff himself and the rest of the Felt Clan into his oven, Lord English is now able to be finally killed off, and you can bet your britches that Spades Slick will be taking this opportunity to its logical limit with the cherry on top being what he plans for his Corpse, I'll show you a visualization of what will happen but Now is the time to ask: How the faiz is this gonna work?

(2:50-3:20 A3I Part 4)

Callie Ohpeee

Fin traces the future path of Vriska

Guilt Tripping

Bedroom

DeeP DiSH: Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, time to riot loose, with a Fandom Arson of Sonic Boom Season 1 episode 9... Guilt Tripping. Belts up Gang, we're about to Land.

DeeP DiSH: Well, Sonic HAS been losing his touch since Sonic Heroes gaves us bad pinball Physics.

DeeP DiSH: So you remember this guy here? He is the Gogoba Chief. We recognize him from the hours of sleep you had from watching Late Fees, but here in his debut episode, he's a main player in a plot that linked it to another show that did something quite similar but failed miserably: Adventure Time's the Silent King.

DeeP DiSH: Yes, we're litterally putting Sonic on the Backburner for something that was, for Robbie the Writer, a very long time coming.

DeeP DiSH: Says the guy who's scared of Vampires, was a thief at one point, and originally doesn't want Finn to be with Flame Princess.

DeeP DiSH: Marketing Overhype at its fuckest folks.

DeeP DiSH: You know what, we're going to save this scene for the conclusion. It's clearly something that will bite this series in the ass later.

{THiN CRUST and DeeP DiSH looked a bit displeased}

DeeP DiSH: There isn't a scene where the Gogobas regurgitate Sonic's Food, right?

DeeP DiSH: Thank God, then he'd face the risk of Goblin AIDS, Goblin AIDS makes your Teeth Go Gray.

DeeP DiSH: What Adventure Time did here just doesn't make any sense and to explain why it's outright nonsensical: We have Dr. Carrot Carrington: Adventure Historian and Bonne Certified Carrotologist. Dr. C: In the Medival Era of history, Kings would often go into battle to prove their bravery and courage. What they are doing by restricting Finn from even giving out a speech is enforcing cowardice, which is frowned upon in circles of nobility. DeeP DiSH: Geez, No wonder the Goblin Kingdom was frowned upon. They're making Glass Joe from Punch Out more braver than those guys.

DeeP DiSH: If you were the king in this type of situation, please do not turn around because if you did, you would see the establishment plotting out the next eight years of eroding rights and human extermination up to and including president trump nuking the earth into nonexistence with World War III.

DeeP DiSH: Can't believe I'm saying this but THANK NEPTUNE FOR THE 'STATUS QUO IS GOD' TROPE!

DeeP DiSH: I honestly did not know that it Nimh was a book.

DeeP DiSH: And it's all because Sega's marketing politics flushed Stephen Frost out the door.

DeeP DiSH: Considering how bad Sega's Marketing over Storytelling Mentality has been following Sonic's Inception, it's all the more depressing that it's obvious Sega's never going to learn.

DeeP DiSH: Why do you have to correct them? Isn't this kinda pointless?

DeeP DiSH: I'm sorry, but I have to agree with Roger on that one; it's dumb, pathetic, and downright sad for any Sonic Fan forced to see his homebase wither away like this.

DeeP DiSH: Why do you think these guys are good manipulators again, you ask? And why is the Chief's crown not falling off of his head?

DeeP DiSH: You're telling me, Sam Sheepdog and Ralph Wolf don't do weird stuff like that, unless it's a lunch break.

DeeP DiSH: Wait until they get back home.

DeeP DiSH: Gotta love that karma folks. One minute you're riding high as one of the few good things on the Fox Box, the next you're being filed for Tax Deductions in an act of Tax Fraud.

WTF is Care Bear Stars

DeeP DiSH: (taps the remote to cue three quotes) To review a fan-based passion project that was decimated by Corporate Brass before it was even able to see is often among the most depressing things to review, granted despite being the best job you can ever have, it ain't always easy. But every time I point out that some dude tried to make a magical girl show based around the Care Bears, It gives me a little bit of determination that any idea can work out in the end. But when I point out that its original creator was pushed out of Youtube upon the appearance of a Cease and Desist order, I die a Little Inside. The fact that this Joshua Click made the Care Bears intentionally Badass gives me the will to live every time I stumble across this show! So, Let's get to it, Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, Time to Riot Loose with a Fandom Arson of Care Bear Stars, The little Spin Off that should have been... Belts Up, Gang. We're about to land!

The Lorax Fandom and You

In the far edge of 2012 where the prickle grass grows and the corporate brass smells slow so sour as it goes and no good ideas fly except those scraped by internet crows layth the street of the lifting Comcast corporation. Adapting the works of Dr. Seuss into fine-tuned family pictures has a lot of elements that could go haywire with the drop of a hat. For every Jim Carrey cast as a 'Grinch', there was a Mike Myers Vehicle waiting to Crash and Bernstein.

Now keep in mind that most of this garbage actually happened, this is literally how Tumblr reacted to an unoriginal piece of animated shlock complete with annoying minion backwash. I have never felt more frightened of or dissapointed in you.

Step One: Watching the Movie

If you're going to consider yourself a fan of something, you're going to have to witness it for yourself to see what the hell the internet sees in this goddamn beanpole. How bad could this movie possibly be?

Skit

Step Two: Count the Characters one, two and three

Take a look at how little characters there are. We've got the Lorax, Onceler, And critters yes. But the characters beyond the Truffula Woods don't get a scent of screentime beyond the freakin' Onceler clan. And they're fucking terrible characters in their own right. At least an askblog or two can flesh out Audrey as a character beyond the bland piece of Who Ass she was in the film. Comcast just made the fatal mistake of not even giving Oncie anyone attractive enough, relevant enough, in-his-timeline enough or not-related-to-him for a stable ship. Who the hell are you going to ship him with, himself?! You already did that, didn't you.

Skit

Step 3: The Askblog Cometh

Vest Oncelers, Suit Oncelers (or greedlers if you want to forsake subtlety), Robot Oncelers, Pimp Oncelers, Old Oncelers. Young Oncelers! Hell, Even the Onceler from the 1972 animated special has an askblog! What could make you stand out from the nonsense that is Money on Wheels? I saw Ted kissing a box of Empty-Os that one time.

Skit

Step 4: Camp --

Step 5: Thneedville High

Step 6: Principle of Business

Step 7: The Truffula Flu

Step 8: Deoncelerization

At this point, you realized that The Lorax was utter garbage. So now you do the sensable thing and scrub any and all scent of Comcast's recent stink from your cast of characters so you can save them for a more copyright-friendly venture.

Skit

Epilogue

And with that, you have officially survived the mess that is the Lorax Fandom. Go forth and tinker with your newly rebranded cast of characters.

Oncest

Logo

Commercial: Banned Cheetos Commercial

DeeP DiSH: Oh Internet! Breakfast is on the way.

(Meanwhile)

Pumpkinator: Viacom CEO Philipe Dauman, Seven Seconds remain until the time comes for your weekly beating.

Phillipe Dauman: Is that you, Pumpkinator?

(Begins transmitting tonight's episode into his brain, causing his head to explode)

Pumpkinator: Ha! Ha! Ha! See you next thursday!

(Flies off)

Intro

DeeP DiSH: Well, Folks. I have some good news and some bad news, bad news is, despite being an overwhelming success, merging two worlds together has reduced the cosby comet and all the inconsequential background troops within it, myself included to mere atoms on the molecule. Good News Is I managed to synchronized my consciousness into another DeeP DiSH unit, thanks for keeping her toasty, Nanna DeeP DiSH!

Nanna DeeP DiSH: Keep up the Good Work, Bud!

DeeP DiSH: Anyway. On to the Review.

Recap

Lorax: The Following Transmission contains ideas you might find psychologically dangerous, observe with caution and please, do not try this malarkey at home.

(A finger aims for Onceler's crotch)

Lorax: No Really, Don't.

To be honest, I'm a little scared that this might act as a shot in the arm for this Fandom because whatever I say might inspire them to do more fanart of this tripe, I'm taking the risk just to see how completely ridiculous it is and how much a fandom can scrape the bottom of the barrel.

okay, context. Lorax is just... forgettable. There is no substance to this story, they try to give it substance what with the framing device of the book being bloated into a dystopia of commercialism which the companies merchandising the smeg out of it apparently failed to notice. The only relatively decent thing about this movie was the cult following of this gangly green noodle of a character.

---

And believe it or not, there was a version of this clown as the cat in the hat! Why the fuck is there a Cat in the Hat Onceler.

---

There was also this process of 'deoncelerization' where you change the oncelersonas into new, original characters. And believe it or not. The big names of this meme started this trend, probably the fandom realizing that the movie was utter garbage and are now re-habilitating their characters into more copyright friendly forms. They seem to be getting the right Idea.

I kept digging to interesting ask blogs, even going as far as to check the Internet Archive to see if those blogs were preserved because this Fandom just, well... It vanished.

---

I'll see you clods next week when '4-once' is a fucking meme.

Rainy Day (My Bed Bugs)

<Don't Hug Me I'm Scared>

(Tony the Talking Clock is laying in bed, Paige the Sketchbook and Geoffrey the Globe are looking down upon themselves, Colin is Sleeping)

Tony: What are we going to do? We're down to our last student.

Paige: I'm sure we'll get the others back, We've been through our share of scrapes.

Geoffrey: You paid the ransom to save Paige and the students! You managed to keep it together when laptop was out for repairs, and don't get me started on your 'thing' with Strignold.

Tony: That was before Manny Escaped, before Brendon showed up, before Crowley- Dear God...

Paige: Hey, DeeP DiSH came back to see us, maybe he can help!

Tony: That's... precisely the main distraction I have at the moment.

Paige: And why's that, Tony?

Tony: (Sits Up) Because for someone to have returned, they need to have left first...

Paige: And?

Tony: He never left.

Paige: oh...

(Beat)

Geoffrey: Well, at least it can't get any worse!

D: What's your Favorite Idea?

Mine is Being Critical

P: How do you get the idea?

D: I Just try to think Critically!

So take a look at this shlong!

Tell me, please, What do you see?

P: It's just generic ol' garbage.

D: Maybe to you, but not to me!

I see a shitty movie!

Breaking the rules of movie chains

P: I don't see what you mean...

D: Cause you're not thinking critically!

D: Now get a load of my shades!

I wear the shades to express myself!

T: That sounds very boring.

I wear the shades to express myself!

Tony: Alright, Alright, Stop the Music, we get it already! You're reviewing this thing for your show

-Thesis-

Recap

The Episode begins with Toofy and Gooby talking about the joke they intend on pulling on Woozy, but J. Edgar

#41: "Video Game References" (Teen Titans Go!)

THiN CRUST: I'm pretty sure you remember our rebuttle of Sonic Boom from the previous Arson... (shows clip from the previous clip.) Well, that's because... I hate bad reboots. "The Looney Tunes Show", "Sailor Moon Crystal", "Sonic X", "Teen Titans Go", "Yo Yogi", "Quack Pack", "New 52", "the Amazing Spider-Man". Heck, Not even Disney's Innocent in this trade, from Maleficent to The Jungle Book to the concept of the freaking Underland, they're under the delusion that they can recreate the Marvel Cinematic Universe out of their animated classics. You better hope to christ that the Night on Bald Mountain movie is your Avengers, Disney or so help me, I'll be praying for the devil himself, Churnabog, to eradicate every last one of those shit reboots. Especially the shitstains Viacom's left on the carpet for us to clean up from J.J. Abrams dissatisfaction with Star Trek to the acquisition of the Ninja Turtles building up to a Michael Bay Movie and a new cartoon that acts like Teen Titans but- (Clip of DonnieXApril) Yeah, we'll be tearing that show apart some day soon.

DeeP DiSH: But by far, the biggest offense is that a man who thinks that cartoons are stupid is given the keys to a comedy-oriented re-interpetation of a 2000s DC Classic: Teen Titans Go! And their hasty writing, cheap animation, and overall immature nature towards its periferary demographic who grew up with the Titans just goes to show why the DC Universe these days ain't giving us nice things... Like Action Cartoons. Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, Time to RiOT loose with a Fandom Arson of Teen Titans Go! Episode --: "Video Game References" Belts up, Gang! We've gotta get acquainted with our latest regular customer.

#42: Super Smash Bros.

Once upon a time, there was a boy by the name of Artemis Haze, he had a wide collection of Nintendo toys.

#43: Gadget 2.0. (Inspector Gadget 2015)

#44: Hose Water (Teen Titans Go!)

THiN CRUST: I'm pretty sure you remember our rebuttle of Sonic Boom from the previous Arson... (shows clip from the previous clip.) Well, that's because... I hate bad reboots. "The Looney Tunes Show", "Sailor Moon Crystal", "Sonic X", "Teen Titans Go", "Yo Yogi", "Quack Pack", "New 52", "the Amazing Spider-Man". Heck, Not even Disney's Innocent in this trade, from Maleficent to The Jungle Book to the concept of the freaking Underland, they're under the delusion that they can recreate the Marvel Cinematic Universe out of their animated classics. You better hope to christ that the Night on Bald Mountain movie is your Avengers, Disney or so help me, I'll be praying for the devil himself, Churnabog, to eradicate every last one of those shit reboots. Especially the shitstains Viacom's left on the carpet for us to clean up from J.J. Abrams dissatisfaction with Star Trek to the acquisition of the Ninja Turtles building up to a Michael Bay Movie and a new cartoon that acts like Teen Titans but- (Clip of DonnieXApril) Yeah, we'll be tearing that show apart some day soon.

DeeP DiSH: But by far, the biggest offense is that a man who thinks that cartoons are stupid is given the keys to a comedy-oriented re-interpetation of a 2000s DC Classic: Teen Titans Go! And their hasty writing, cheap animation, and overall immature nature towards its periferary demographic who grew up with the Titans just goes to show why the DC Universe these days ain't giving us nice things... Like Action Cartoons. Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, Time to RiOT loose with a Fandom Arson of Teen Titans Go! Episode --: "Hose Water" Belts up, Gang! We've gotta get acquainted with our latest regular customer.

#46: Robopeck (Back at the Barnyard)

#47: Jimmy Timmy Power Hour (FOP)

Well, if it isn't the Fairly OddParents Equivilent to Atlantis Squarepantis.

#48: Disney Infinity 2.0.

Part 1: The Toy Box and its Games

Disney Infinity 2.0. been in circulation for nearly a year now, which means it's time for our midseason tradition of dissecting the world of the Toy Box and its new offerings. We've nailed together... or rather, I've nailed together a format for these specific reviews. We'll be starting with the Toy Box this time around and all the New Toys it has to offer. Well, for starters, there are new road pieces, new blocks, new skydome-and-terrain combos, and new Non-Existance for the Toy Vault, Replaced with a fancy Toy Store because lets not fool ourselves. (Nostalgia Critic: I *Bleep* Hate Biodome) Though, granted, These Baby steps are to be expected, I do hope there's room for improvement in 3.0. just as there is for the new INteriors function from this particular version. What the Nuts, A separate Folder?! (BLEEP) Dat Noise, I'm goin' to Grizzlebees!

Well at least the Creativitoys are still operational indoors. And they've gotten themselves an upgrade.

-Assault on Asgaurd-

-Escape from the Kylm-

-Stitch's Tropical Rescue-

-Brave Forest Siege-

Part 2: Playsets

-Avengers Playset-

-Spiderman Playset-

-Gaurdians of the Galaxy Playset-

-Toy Box Exclusive Characters-

-Theoretical Big Hero 6 Playset-

-Theoretical Wreck-It Ralph Playset-

-Theoretical Toy Story that Time Forgot-

Part 3: An Open Letter to John Vignocchi

Hey, John. It's Alex. I decided to write this open letter to you and the rest of The Walt Disney Company as a loud cry to see if you'd be willing to lend an ear to our cause. Precisely one year ago, We explained why and How Disney Infinity can be used to tell a heartwarming story using the Don Bluth Principle of 'Kids can take Just about Anything as long as it has a happy ending.' while taking it to its logical conclusion. Its now one year on and you're ready to roll out the final major brand Disney has in its Arsenal of IP, Ready to move onto producing the next chapter. To be honest, one of your hosting First Party Companies, Nintendo, they're in talks to begin a new chapter themselves. And their definition of 'the next chapter' is anything but 'more of the same' unlike most companies. Because let's face it, there are more people in the industry that care more about selling toys than telling stories, but Nintendo is a company that's been there and done that longer than Uncle Walt has been alive. Think about that for a second. Nintendo has existed longer that Walter Elias Disney, let alone the concept of Video Games.

Nintendo's actually more like Disney than the actual company. The irony is... Nintendo was generations ahead of them. See, Each Generation of Disney ages like wine. It has a pretty stellar taste at first, but when it ultimately turns sour towards the end with horrible Idea after horrible Idea, It's safe to say it's time to swap out the head honcho in favor of a new kid on the block. We've seen it with Michael Eisner's Direct-To-Video Sequel Shenanagans. And as much as we don't like to admit it, the live action re-imaginings of Already Iconic Disney Classics. That's Mister Iger's cue to get out and make room for a new bossman. Let's hope Tom Staggs or whoever else might be capable of filling Rob's shoes because if you don't pull yourself together, You might just fade into the ether like you almost did with Cinderella. I don't want that to happen, you own Marvel, You own Star Wars, You own Mickey Mouse for god's sake! The bench you guys have is really fraggin' deep, and the fact that executives keep you away from fully taping into said deep bench and instead focusing more onto the new additions to the deep bench is really draining in the hope department if you catch my drift.

The Fact is that Nintendo is older than any American entertainment company, There's you guys, but then there's Warner Bros., Viacom, Screen Gems, Sony, Even Universal Believe it or not. Nintendo is the only company in the business of entertainment to have originated in the 1800s, try wrapping your head around that. and it's because of that sense of longevity that the Boss has pretty much decided to go 'Nintendotarian' and thus is only willing to play Nintendo Games and buy Nintendo Things and nothing else, he's even sworn off American movies entirely. because you followed the routine. You imitate, because you're afraid to innovate. Hell, Even Skylanders Innovates. You cobble together penis-envy explosions into a 90 minute toy commercial and you call it a feature film. Allowing Ariel to outlive the heroine of the original story by Hans Christen Anderson, Toys. Ignoring things such as natural character development in favor of aforementioned penis envy explosions, Toys. Ripping Off FoodFight and puking video games into it, Toys. The Paint-By-Numbers Plot of the Haunted Mansion Movie, Toys. The Cars Franchise Existing, Toys. Live-Action Re-Interpetations, Toys. Film Studios Act like Toy Companies in an effort to push ticket sales and keep the roof over their heads, Disney Used to be the exception to this, Making Money to make the movies he wanted to make... But not anymore.

There's no more personal touches in movies these days, the whole system's run by a corporate mass of shareholders who think they know what demographics want, and time and again with the backlash with 'Teen Titans Go!' 'Mr. Pickles' and 'Family Guy' and through the success of 'Gravity Falls', 'Steven Universe', 'My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic', and yes... Even the not one, but two massive multiplayer crossover franchises you have under your belt... The Customer has proved that it's always right and demographic charts are always wrong. It's not what they show on the outside with layers of special effects and, for lack of a better word, Pingas-Envy Explosions, but the memorable characters and the journey that these particular characters go through. Quality of Quantity, The Boss would often say. But you're pre-occupied these days with trying to top pigs with pigs and as a wiseman knew from experience, that's a bad idea if there ever was one. If Frozen 2's plot's as predictable as we've expected, You're probably going to learn the hard way. And with the world as our stage, the public will know how sour the company has gotten. Not because we despise this company, far from it, we want it to get better. (TOM: Criticism serves a healthy function, sometimes it can help you get better. That's because it comes from a good place.) People call out your shortcomings because we know for a fact that with the money you've got in your vault, you can do better. People rag on Time Warner because Disney needs viable competition because let's not fool ourselves, DreamWorks was never fit to be in the same ranks as you to begin with. We openly beat on Viacom... Because it does not deserve to exist. (Irwin: I have no Friends)

But the point of the matter is, There's a Way you can redeem yourselves, a way to use the Toy Box universe as the perfect tool for storytelling that it can potentially be. And I happen to have sent it to you guys already, by the time you watch this video. I conclude my message with the words of Another Wiseman, 'there's a storm coming in, you either evolve or perish'. It's your choice, guys. Because the Boss is more than happy to let you guys rot away into nothing like so many other companies out there. And It's not just for this very game, Its for the movies as well. I hear you're remaking the aformentioned Haunted Mansion Movie. It's a simple fix, really. You utalize the plot in the ride as a backstory and have the butler be a living decendant of the killer, Madame Leota. And for Maleficent 2, go balls to the wall and be creative with this character, prove to us that this Maleficent can at least be up to par with the Mistress of All Evil we've come to know and love. And in terms of keeping your animated classics relevant in the modern age, how about you just re-release them on Streaming Services so that when the corresponding Live Action Re-Interpetation fails to please, at least they can go back to it to watch again and again.

Because Like with this very game, Disney Infinity, The Possiblities are Endless. You guys are ready to roll out the third generation of the building blocks we have used to build our own adventures that you deem worthy of upholding the creativity of this company that has touched so many hearts, united so many families, created so many memories. To put it bluntly, Uncle Walt said this and said it well: 'If you can Dream it, You can Do it!' Again, I am praying that you look inside, and lord knows that plenty of fans are praying too, Remember the man who made you who you are, Because unlike the Boss, I still have hope for this deep bench of a conglomerate. After all, The success and fame you've garnered in the past, it was all brought to you by one man. One soul. One heart that acts as the drill to create the heavens, and as you always say, this entertainment company/heaven-creating drill started with a mouse.

#49:

#50: Sonic Boom X (Re-Imaginating)

#60: Arc Rise Fantasia

THiN CRUST: This Season was a whirlwind of Suffering, I sat through two of the shittiest shows that are still on the air today, our weekly schedule was comprimised by our co-head writer being screwed over by a freak rainstorm, I was kidnapped by my old boss who's somehow an angel of darkness now, And my relationship with Mr DeeP DiSH has been through hell and back merely through the limitations of my computer. But if there's one thing we've got, it's a light at the end, something to congratulate us on a season well done.

DeeP DiSH: And the game I decided to pick for our final dive into the abyss? Arc Rise Fantasia,

#Q: Marville Livewire

Issue 8: Lock and Key

• Young Xehanort and Eraqus joins the group on orders from Ted Turner VII to protect the universe from Remake!King Stephan's Ghost posessing his Wife Jane Fonda XIII via Bobsheaux's Box.
• Ted Turner and Jane Fonda are playing Duel Monsters on Motorcycles while the Rest of the Livewires are on A Skateboard (Haxidecimal), Snow Skis (Hollowpoint Ninja), Rollerskates (Social Butterfly), A Radio Flyer (Gothic Lolita), And a Unicycle (Cornfed)
• Thirteen Pages in, The Livewires arrive at Al's Camping Tent (The Mansion was lost to the crap economy.)
• A Giant Gunman with an enormous pointed phallic cleft follows them into the past.
• The comic ends with Eraqus realizing the true nature of their new mecha bodies and Hax trying to cheer him up with a thing the future does not have: "Clean Underwear!"

Issue 9

Issue 10

Issue 11

Issue 12

Issue 13

WHATCULTURE

7 things from the past ten years that will utterly depress you

7. Twitch Plays Pokemon has better writers than most children's cartoons

6. The Death of Saturday Morning Cartoons

5. Robocop's Reboot features barely any Robocop!

The Robocop you've come to know was red hot as the blood it splattered across cinema screens everywhere! It sported a colorful cast of characters and a strong moral message that makes it all the more awesome for the adults who were to consume it.

This newfangled Robocop is nothing more than a bunch of copypasted characters. The only absentee was the kickass girl cop who was required to be out of commission so that the lead can save her, since the only woman on the force was replaced by Axel Foley clone No. 1221. Robocop's Chrome plating was replaced with nothing but black with the occasional dark gray for the sake of contrast. And need we remind you of the PG-13 Rating they were forced to implement?

4. Duke Nukem Forever

Imagine if you will, you waited for the Force Awakens for quite a long time and you were promised an early glimpse at the new Star Wars feature, blindly believing it to be The Force Awakens... But it's revealed to be Jar-Jar Binks starring in a New Star Wars Holiday Special!

3. Video Games have become a Floundering Industry

2. A World Without Toonami

1. The Hamburglar is a better Human than You!

Imagine if you will, a quiet suburban home where a quite handsome man spends some quality time with his wife and son, meat patties on the barbecue, flipping 'em in a hammy fashion when he receives word that a recovering McDonald's is offering an Angus Third-Pound burger for a limited time.

Naturally, A man like him would want to try one during this rare opportunity. So he gears up in a trenchcoat, red gloves, striped shirt and a cheezy black Zorro Mask that might have made him look cute back in his portly 'ol childhood days but now makes him as menacing as you'd expect out of such a well-built person of his stature.

In case you were wondering, this man is the Hamburglar, having grown up and moved on with his life since last we saw the guy in 2002: Thirteen Years Ago! And now you realize that if you fall under the category of 'privileged white 30-something man-child weeaboo loser'. You have now realized that the Hamburglar, a freakin' HR Puffinstuf-esque character from a goddamn fast-food restaurant chain was treated nicely by puberty, got himself a wife, complete with offspring, and lived a pretty decent middle-class lifestyle while Anita Sarkeesian regularly yells at you to treat women in video games seriously atop the groaning bodies of the Gamers that don't fall into the aforementioned category of '-category-'. It's sad to see how low the bottom of the masculinity barrel has gotten over the past fifteen years.

7 Essential Tips for Kingdom Hearts to Pull its act together

Intro

Kingdom Hearts has proven to be one of Square Enix's biggest cash cow franchises under its belt that isn't either A)-Final Fantasy, B)-A European/American Franchise or C)-Final Fantasy Seven. But there's this looming problem that's basically acted as a thorn on the brand's side, not alot of new fans are getting into the franchise. Even with the two HD Collections they've developed, Nomura's favorite pet project is still facing stagnant growth.

7. Reboot that sonnabitch!

Kingdom Hearts has lured fans in with a sense of mystery, answers would be provided but the game would aimlessly throw in new questions to keep the ruse up. But It was when they utilized the concept of Time Travel that we realized the shtick wasn't funny anymore. So what do you do for a mindless rollercoaster of mindfuckery? Simple, Torch the canon and run!

6. Two Worlds, One Family

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There has to be an at least visible divide between the Disney side and Square Enix's cast of characters. I'd propose

5. A trip into the Toy Box

You may think it's a joke, but we are far from joking.

With Disney Infinity, it's possible to mix and match franchises in an internal storyline within the Safety of the Toy Box where the established canon is worth precisely dick.

4. Greyer Morality

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