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Revision as of 00:10, 12 March 2018 (edit) 162.158.63.52 (Talk) (→#A-5:) ← Previous diff		Revision as of 00:15, 12 March 2018 (edit) (undo) 162.158.63.52 (Talk) (→#R-α: Doctor Eggman) Next diff →
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	===#A-1: Original Characters===		===#A-1: Original Characters===
-	===#R-α: Doctor Eggman===	+	===#R-α: Bandana Dee===
-	THiN-CRUST: What's left to take?	+	DeeP DiSH: Captain?
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		+	THiN-CRUST: (Looks to the screen to find that Bandana Dee in SSF2) IT'S EVERYWHERE! IT'S EVERYWHERE! IT'S EVERYWHERE! IT'S EVERYWHERE!
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	===#R-Ω: Simon Belmont===		===#R-Ω: Simon Belmont===
	===#J-χ: ===		===#J-χ: ===

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Revision as of 00:15, 12 March 2018

Contents 1 Gags 1.1 Because x________ 1.2 Clips 2 Unsorted Shows 2.1 Thin Crust Loves KINGDOM HEARTS (TheKHRP) 2.1.1 (1-Davis Family, Bonnie Anderson) 2.2 Step 1: birth by sleep 2.3 Step 2: Kingdom Hearts 2.4 Step 3: Chain of Memories 2.5 Step 4: 358/2 Days 2.6 Step 5: Kingdom Hearts II 2.7 Step 6: coded 2.8 Step 7: Dream Drop Distance 2.9 To The Future (KHRP Game) 2.10 Mario Party 6 2.11 RebelTaxi NiGo Season 2 (How I Spent my Supper Vacation) 2.11.1 Intro 2.11.2 Piñata Island 2.11.3 Poké-Paradise 2.11.4 <FE:A Country> 2.11.5 Epilogue 2.12 The Downfall of CAPCOM 2.13 RebelTaxi Loves TURNER BROADCASTING (Donald Trump) 2.14 Top 10 Star Wars DI Figurines: Original Trilogy 2.15 Top 10 Star Wars DI Figurines: Prequel Trilogy 2.16 Top 10 Star Wars DI Figurines: Expanded Universe 2.17 RebelTaxi Hates STEVEN MOFFAT (#Trump4Who) 2.18 RebelTaxi Hates LET'S KILL HITLER (WtFaiz, River!?) 2.19 RebelTaxi Hates THE WEDDING OF RIVER SONG (Isn't It All Pointless?) 2.20 RebelTaxi Hates THE DOCTOR, THE WIDOW AND THE WARDROBE (Androzani, What!?) 2.21 RebelTaxi Hates ASYLUM OF THE DALEKS (Just Cameos!?!) 2.22 RebelTaxi Hates THE ANGELS TAKE MANHATTAN (Predictable) 2.23 RebelTaxi Hates THE SNOWMEN (Old Monster Desecration) 2.24 RebelTaxi Hates THE BELLS OF SAINT JOHN (Frankenstory) 2.25 RebelTaxi Hates THE NAME OF THE DOCTOR (OMGWTFGENIUS!) 2.26 RebelTaxi Hates THE DAY OF THE DOCTOR (TYLER!) 2.27 RebelTaxi Hates THE TIME OF THE DOCTOR (Pray for Petey) 2.28 RebelTaxi Hates .--. 2.29 RebelTaxi Hates GOSEI SENTAI AKIBARANGER (Humiliation) 2.30 5 reasons why TOEI must dump SABAN BRANDS 2.30.1 Prologue 2.30.2 5: Greed 2.30.3 4: The "Power Ups" 2.30.4 3: Nickelodeon's Greed 2.30.5 2: Disney's Changed 2.30.6 1: Gangnam Girls 2.30.7 Epilogue 2.31 Cartoon Network Pilots 2.31.1 Scedule 2.32 Exchange Student Zero 2.32.1 Recap 2.33 The Electric Piper 2.33.1 Thesis 2.33.2 Recap 2.34 South Park Kickstarter 2.35 Sonic Boom X (How we'd salvage Sonic Boom) 2.35.1 Step One: The Blue Blur Arc 2.35.2 Step Two: Return to Mobius 2.35.3 Step Three: The Child of Solaris 2.36 Top 5 Smashers untouched by Sakurai 2.37 Animated Atrocities Score 3 September 2013 3.1 Newcomer: DEEP DiSH 3.1.1 Arrival 3.2 The Downfall of Nintendo (#DInACE) 3.2.1 Intro 3.2.2 Animal Crossing: New Leaf 3.2.3 Wii U Woes 3.2.4 Out of Touch with the Internet 3.2.5 "Games, Not Art" 3.2.6 Phase One: The Resistance 3.2.7 Phase Two: The Offer 3.2.8 Step Three: The Rebuild 3.2.9 Outro and Events 4 Fandom Arson 4.1 3/7/15 4.2 5/4/15 4.3 Fandy Handy Dandy Guide Reverse: The Time Traveler's Guide to 2013 4.3.1 Step 1: Those Kooky Hipsters 4.3.2 Step 2: Party Hardy 4.3.3 Step 3: Time Lord Troubles 4.3.4 Step 4: 50 Shades of Lame 4.3.5 Step 5: Star Trek into Yaoi 4.3.6 Step 6: Waifu Warzone 4.3.7 Step 7: Twerk it Hard 4.3.8 Step 8: A Pokemon World 4.4 Fandy Handy Dandy Guide Reverse: The Time Traveler's Guide to 2014 4.5 Fandy Handy Dandy Guide Reverse: The Time Traveler's Guide to 2015 4.6 How I'd Fix Sword Art Online 4.6.1 1: Fleshing Out the Game 4.6.2 2: Party System 4.6.3 3: Asuna 4.6.4 4: Kirito 4.6.5 5: Tentacle Porn 4.6.6 6: A Balanced Cast 4.6.7 7: The Premise 4.7 How I'd Fix Sailor Moon 4.7.1 6: Time Shenanigans 4.8 Fighting Foodons 4.8.1 Clip 1 4.8.2 Clip 2 4.8.3 Clip 3 4.8.4 Clip 4 4.8.5 Regular Customer 4.9 Rudy's First Adventure v. Dimmsdale Daze 4.9.1 The Episode itself 4.10 Birth of a Salesman (Jimmy Neutron) 4.11 Marvel Mastery 4.12 NEWS 4.12.1 Report 4.12.2 Beast 4.12.2.1 Blossom Detective Holmes Ad 4.12.3 The Last thing I Ever Wanted to Report 4.13 Loops 4.13.1 Loop 1 4.13.2 Loop 2 4.13.3 Loop 3 4.13.4 Loop 4 4.13.5 Loop 5 4.13.6 Loop 6 4.13.7 Loop 7 4.13.8 Loop 8 4.13.9 Loop 9 4.13.10 Loop 10 4.13.11 Loop 11 4.13.12 Loop 12 4.13.13 Loop 13 4.14 How I'd probably book 4.14.1 Red Ribbon Arms Race 4.14.2 Marvel's Gargoyles 4.14.3 Disney presents: Marvel's Beauty and the Beast 4.14.4 Marvel's Kingdom Hearts 4.14.5 Yoshi Muyo 4.15 Unlucky Knuckles 4.16 Yooka-Laylee 4.17 Why Tetsuya Nomura is the Cancer of Square Enix 4.17.1 How Nomura got upstairs 4.17.2 Why Nomura is Bad for Games 4.17.3 What happened to Square 4.18 Fairly OddParents: WTF HAPPENED? 4.18.1 Secret Origin of Denzel Crocker 4.18.2 Dimmsdale Daze 4.19 Unnamed Episode 4.19.1 PC Publisher 4.20 MARVEL VS DC: The Other Guys 4.21 HDG-R: What to Expect Smash 5 4.21.1 Opening Comic 4.21.2 Thesis 4.21.3 Step One: Time to Cut the Cheese 4.21.4 Step Two: The comeback Kids 4.21.5 Step Three: This Stage is Just too Small 4.21.6 Step Four: Gotta Catch 'Em All! 4.21.7 Step Five: Trophy Tussle 4.21.8 Step Six: Tentpole Overdose 4.21.9 Step Seven: New Tentpole Overdose 4.21.10 Step Eight: Can't Beat the Classics 4.21.11 Step Nine: Spinning Off the Deep End 4.22 Smash Underground 4.23 Shorts 4.23.1 Thesis 4.23.2 Episode Zero: The Blinkers 4.23.3 Prologue 4.23.4 Episode 2: Alien8ed 4.23.5 Episode 1: The Wishing Rock 4.23.6 Episode 2.5.: Super Spurts 4.23.7 Episode 4: Big Bad Booger 4.24 GHOSTBUSTERS (2016) 4.25 Boy who Would be Queen v Just the Two of Us 4.26 Bionicle Legends of Metru Nui 4.27 Exchange Student Zero 4.28 Dr Eggman's Tomato Sauce 4.28.1 Recap 4.28.2 Conclusion 4.29 Size Matters 4.30 Marvel Memoire 4.30.1 Unwilling Gwenpool 4.31 How I would have handled Belle's Magical World 4.32 ? 4.33 Top Ten Archie Sonic Characters 4.33.1 10 4.33.2 09 4.33.3 08 4.33.4 07 4.33.5 06 4.33.6 05 4.33.7 04 4.33.8 03 4.33.9 02 4.33.10 01 4.34 Top Ten Archie Megaman Characters 4.35 Late Fees Rogerified 4.36 Once Upon a Townsville 4.36.1 Opening Skit 4.36.2 Recap 4.36.3 Conclusion 4.37 Don't Judge Me 4.37.1 Recap 4.37.2 Conclusion 4.37.2.1 Horrible Mistakes 4.37.2.2 Final Words 4.38 Top 10 Reasons to Stuff Kingdom Hearts into Homestuck 4.38.1 Ditch Doze 4.38.2 Retcon Trolls 4.38.3 Artificial Identities 4.38.4 Character Prototyping 4.38.5 A Victory for the Midnight Crew 4.38.6 The Fall of English 4.38.7 Callie Ohpeee 4.39 Guilt Tripping 4.39.1 Bedroom 4.40 WTF is Care Bear Stars 4.41 Spider-Man Homecoming or The Emoji Movie 4.42 The Lorax Fandom and You 4.42.1 Step One: Watching the Movie 4.42.2 Skit 4.42.3 Step Two: Count the Characters one, two and three 4.42.3.1 Skit 4.42.4 Step 3: The Askblog Cometh 4.42.4.1 Skit 4.42.5 Step 4: Camp -- 4.43 Step 5: Thneedville High 4.44 Step 6: Principle of Business 4.45 Step 7: The Truffula Flu 4.46 Step 8: Deoncelerization 4.46.1 Skit 4.47 Epilogue 4.48 Oncest 4.48.1 Recap 4.49 Rainy Day (My Bed Bugs) 4.49.1 Recap 4.50 #41: "Video Game References" (Teen Titans Go!) 4.51 #42: Super Smash Bros. 4.52 #43: Gadget 2.0. (Inspector Gadget 2015) 4.53 #44: Hose Water (Teen Titans Go!) 4.54 #46: Robopeck (Back at the Barnyard) 4.55 #47: Jimmy Timmy Power Hour (FOP) 4.56 #48: Disney Infinity 2.0. 4.56.1 Part 1: The Toy Box and its Games 4.56.2 Part 2: Playsets 4.56.3 Part 3: An Open Letter to John Vignocchi 4.57 #MF: ReBoot: The Guardian Code 4.58 #50: Sonic Boom X (Re-Imaginating) 4.59 #60: Arc Rise Fantasia 4.60 #96: (Zixx) Phunkee Zee 4.61 #97: Super Smash Bros. Switch Wishlist 4.61.1 The Rundown 4.61.2 #A-5: Doctor Eggman 4.61.3 #A-4: 4.61.4 #A-3: 4.61.5 #A-2: 4.61.6 #A-1: Original Characters 4.61.7 #R-α: Bandana Dee 4.61.8 #R-Ω: Simon Belmont 4.61.9 #J-χ: 4.62 Kingdom Hearts X Back Cover 4.63 #Q: Marville Livewire 5 WHATCULTURE 5.1 7 things from the past ten years that will utterly depress you 5.1.1 7. Twitch Plays Pokemon has better writers than most children's cartoons 5.1.2 6. The Death of Saturday Morning Cartoons 5.1.3 5. Robocop's Reboot features barely any Robocop! 5.1.4 4. Duke Nukem Forever 5.1.5 3. Video Games have become a Floundering Industry 5.1.6 2. A World Without Toonami 5.1.7 1. The Hamburglar is a better Human than You! 5.2 7 Essential Tips for Kingdom Hearts to Pull its act together 5.2.1 Intro 5.2.2 7. Reboot that sonnabitch! 5.2.3 6. Two Worlds, One Family 5.2.4 5. A trip into the Toy Box 5.2.5 4. Greyer Morality 5.2.6 3. 5.2.7 2. 5.2.8 1.

Gags

Because x________

Clips

• Of Course!

Unsorted Shows

Thin Crust Loves KINGDOM HEARTS (TheKHRP)

<Pan Pizza: The Coach>

Pan Pizza: Okay, So what in godbear's name has you believing that you're Rebel Taxi Material?

<Thin Crust: Rookie of the Year>

Thin Crust: Well, I've got this Idea for a video segment It's called the 'Waifu of the Day'.

Pan Pizza: The What?

Thin Crust: My friend this is where I Select an Image of a chick that Turns me on rock hard and then Immortalise it on my Wall!

Pan Pizza: Do you have an Example of this new gag?

Thin Crust: Quite, do you know why they're going for a prequel instead of a sequel...

Pan Pizza: I'm sure they have a legitamate reason fo-(sees the Waifu) Ohh...Ohhhhhh!!! AW! YES!

Thin Crust: Think she's a better Idea than Monsters University...

Pan Pizza: Hell to the Yes!

Thin Crust: Thank you, As for my Segment Idea, Try this on for Size!

(Intro)

Pan Pizza: Ooohh... Pirated, I like that part in ya.

Thin Crust: And what do ya think of the set?

Pan Pizza: <Your Opinion of the Set>

Thin Crust: Alright, We've got a Show to do so let's get right to it. You and Me are gonna roll on through the entire Seeker of Darkness Saga for the Project, Run down an Elaborate Analysis of each of the Games and get into details of what we want to see. We add the Characters to our boster board that we've got there and plan out our story with you guys the fans. The first thing we gotta do is this... (drops the Xehanort Saga in the Garbage) with that said, lets dig into the leftovers.

(1-Davis Family, Bonnie Anderson)

Pan Pizza: uhhhh... Toy Story?

Thin Crust: yep.

Pan Pizza: the first ever CGI feature length film

Thin Crust: yep.

Pan Pizza: What? Are ya pulling my leg or somthin... huh?

Thin Crust: No Sempai, I'm ensuring Kingdom Hearts III becomes the first ever Interactive Motion Picture

Pan Pizza: What?

Thin Crust: It's a dream of mine... I'd be delighted to see this dream realised.

Pan Pizza: Yeah, Nobody Cares so... Why them?

Thin Crust: Why do I think the Davis clan and Bonnie Anderson are Important Characters? Well, in this story I'm setting up, Terra is Andy's Older Brother and Eraqus is the Father.

Step 1: birth by sleep

---

Next is Vanitas, a creepy mofo who spawns these Unversed creatures all over place.

And finally, There's Master Anthony Brian Xehanort. He's more or less a good guy who will ultimately reboot the franchise without that Rich Bitch Destiny Taking the wheel. He knows for a fact that nopony can die in this kind of Franchise, just ask Nomura!

Step 2: Kingdom Hearts

And this is where we get the Sora, Riku and Kairi we've come to know. Let's Add the Toys to our Box here

Step 3: Chain of Memories

Step 4: 358/2 Days

Step 5: Kingdom Hearts II

Step 6: coded

Step 7: Dream Drop Distance

---

And Reibranz makes it all complete! Give him a round of applause, for he's the last character we're gonna get in the games so far! Let us Cinnabrate!

To The Future (KHRP Game)

Mario Party 6

RebelTaxi NiGo Season 2 (How I Spent my Supper Vacation)

Intro

It's been one shell of a ride for my sempai and my comrade, A Gurren-Lagann Review, an interview with Maxwell Atoms, A subscription from one of our least enjoyable people... It's been a blast to see it unfold, But now's the time to ask: Doof, where have you been? Well, Now I'm ready to tell ya! Welcome, my friends, to Season 2.

Piñata Island

Poké-Paradise

<FE:A Country>

During Alph's time in the Pokémon world, I was with my Dragonauge... or at least, the young lady who used to be my Dragonauge...

Epilogue

Eventually, We reunited at another universe altogether. There was coffee as we saw a Curious Comet pass by which would be refined into the Cosby Comet you see before you by me and Deep Dish using a mysterious power embued upon us by a nebula of some sort. I think it gave the last guy cancer...

The Downfall of CAPCOM

Nintendo has gotten itself out of its sales slump when it comes to the Wii U... for now at least... But there's one target that I mentioned that may get Disney's Foot in the Door when it comes to the Japanese Market and, you guessed it, taking over the world.

<Cue Capcom clip>

But what can you do with a company as troubled as Capcom. Well for starters, we can breathe new life into Megaman since the last Megaman Game was a just a fanmade crossover with Street Fighter. Let's face it we did not expect the latest Megaman to come from Goddamn Box Art, Like, Dude, that may seem funny to some people but to the fans who trusted you to put Megaman in the Game, That's a dangerously low blow, dude!

Moving on to Dead Rising, the latest notable franchise on our list. The timeline and mythos now spans more than a Decade with it's third Installment, I see a bottle of Nerd Rage in your future.

Devil May Cry, badass hack n' slash adventure. Recently suffered just because the story was rebooted in a vain attempt to appeal to western audiences, although Raptor News has some potential. Not Disney's cup of tea but what can you do? Also unlikely to survive unscathed in the big Disney Buyout to come...

Resident Evil, A lesson from Don Bluth says: Children can take anything as long as there's a Happy Ending. You don't need to make it overly sappy, just have the goal of the game unsures that everybody lives, and that they're all in this Together, speaking of Sunday School Musical

Capcom Fighters are definitely a Packaged Deal, Especially when you count in the Capcom vs. Whatever Franchise, Which crosses over Street Fighter, Darkstalkers, All those Classic Capcom Fighters, even the other Capcom franchises out there and renders all deals to buy individual franchises entirely useless. I'm including Breath of Fire and Power Stone because I guess they're fighters, I dunno, I never even heard of 'em except for Power Stone for it is badass. According to a recent tweet from Yoshinoki Ono, the creator of Street Fighter, Capcom does not have enough resources to even port over Ultra Street Fighter 4, The money thing I get since they only have at most 152 million bucks left to spend, And they fired half their european staff. It's painfully obvious that Capcom's goin' Tits up in the months to come.

Bad Buisness Habits, Overreliance on bad DLC, Burying franchises, Milking only one franchise 'til it's bone dry, Needless to say, They're Screwed and you're in luck! Who's biting first, Midway, Arc, Dare I say... Disney? As you can tell by my collection of Disney Infinity Swag, The Answer is obvious.

Act now and you can relegate the very Management who got them into this mess to man the Ticket Booths at Tokyo Disneyland.

RebelTaxi Loves TURNER BROADCASTING (Donald Trump)

Pan Pizza: Welcome Back to Divorce Horse! If you are just joining us, Donald Trump needs to his Broadcasting Empire beyond Just the Apprentice.

---

Thin Crust: Pan, We wish to negotiate some terms for Donald Trump.

Top 10 Star Wars DI Figurines: Original Trilogy

3.0.'s coming up faster than a sweating bullet, and with it: Star Wars. We already know the guys from The Force Awakens will be well on their way to the Toy Factory, but there's no word on the Trilogy that started it all and that's what I'm counting down.

Top 10 Star Wars DI Figurines: Prequel Trilogy

Top 10 Star Wars DI Figurines: Expanded Universe

RebelTaxi Hates STEVEN MOFFAT (#Trump4Who)

RebelTaxi Hates LET'S KILL HITLER (WtFaiz, River!?)

---

The Doctor: Put him in the Cuboard.

Pan Pizza: What?

Pan Pizza: WHAT!? They have the oppritunity to explore a universe where World War Dos is freakin stopped and you shelve that plotline for-?

(Mels collapses)

Pan Pizza: Well, She was completely Pointless, Wasn't she...

Thin Crust: Actually...

Pan Pizza: Let's give a gihugic novelty hand to Mels the Most Pointless companion ever!

<Cue Party Scene from Wild Force>

The Doctor: We'll call your parents,

Mels:

<The same scene from Wild Force where everone stops partying>

Pan Pizza: *getting his pot out* huh?

Mels: Penny in the air...

Pan Pizza: Oh, no.

Mels: Penny Drops.

Pan Pizza: Thinny, Who names their kid "Mels".

Thin Crust: No one! It must be short for something like-

Mels: Melody.

The Doctor: You named your daughter... after your daughter.

Thin Crust:

RebelTaxi Hates THE WEDDING OF RIVER SONG (Isn't It All Pointless?)

RebelTaxi Hates THE DOCTOR, THE WIDOW AND THE WARDROBE (Androzani, What!?)

---

It starts with a spaceship exploding at the hands of the Doctor-Wait! I'm gonna need some Doritos and Mountain Dew, It's pretty obvious that this episode's gonna rely solely on Rule of Cool here... The Doctor survives the noisy fall from space to the serface of Early 20th Century London through a fancy Impact Suit-Hold Up! This just isnt the Right Size Bag and Bottle for the Job...(The Bottle and bag are replaced with a 20 oz bottle and a family sized bag) ...What? I needed something a bit more potent...

However, seeing the Doctor not only survive, but making sounds, in the airless vacuum of space is ridiculous. Further, the Doctor should have burned up in the Earth’s atmosphere, or been splattered into smithereens by the force of impact. But, it’s Christmas, and for once, Steven Moffat tried to offer an explanation for his seeming plot hole, so I’m gonna let this one slide – even if said explanation (the Doctor is wearing an “impact suit” that is repairing his damaged body, which is why he cannot remove the helmet, thus hiding his face from Madge, and leading to the events of the episode) is a bit contrived.

---

And Now, If you excuse me. I have a Six Hour Challenge to Run for Toonami and a Best Doctor Who Stories List to compile for the Campaign. And seeing as the Toonami Six Hour is Super Cereal because Cartoons, The Latter of the two (Pulls Snacks from under the Table) It's Gonna be all Your Fault! Pepsico Foodstuffs Wrapped in Kilbasa and Spicy Italian Sausages, Don't fail me now!

RebelTaxi Hates ASYLUM OF THE DALEKS (Just Cameos!?!)

Thin Crust: This Episode...Ugh!

Pan Pizza: What he's saying is... Ugh!

Both: It makes no... Gah!!!

Thin Crust: Asylum of the Daleks... I mean this is the lowest a Dalek story can possibly get, Lower than Destiny of the Daleks, Lower than Revalation, Evolution even! This thing looses to the one where a Dalek Rams a Guy up his Time Vortex to become...This!

---

Pan Pizza: This is by far the Jumping the Shark Moment of all Dalek-kind, Ruining them for the rest of the series and I hope to christ that the Daleks are soon Retired after this episode because we cant handle what kind of re-establishment Moffat would have in Store for the Show.

Thin Crust: With a Plot made of Swiss Cheese and wasted opportunities aplenty, this is by far the worst season opener since Warriors of the Deep. If you know what that is from whatever source you heard it from, please go take a few minutes with us... (He and Pan Pizza stare into the Mirror in tears)

-Transition-

Thin Crust: Now do you understand why we need this Masterplan?

RebelTaxi Hates THE ANGELS TAKE MANHATTAN (Predictable)

For this episode Moffat should be bringing his A-Game. He would ensure that the Ponds' Exit from the Show is a worthwhile adventure and perk up those who still have faith in him after the total train wrecks he wrote beforehand...

---

Ya know, This scene is not only pointless but it spoils the surprise you've got for Rory! Speaking of The boy who waited...

---

Ya see that tombstone that's over there If anyone in the audience does not see this thing being important later allow me to get you a number for a good psychiatrist.

---

(Bwaaaaa! Bwa-Bwaaa-Bwaaa!)

Rory begs the Doc- Wait, Ya Know what? I'm not even gonna call him that! Rory Begs Shinji the Slinky to try and fix this but Shinji the Slinky reminds him of fixed time. My god I can't believe I Live in a Universe where this is acctually Possible

Rory Decides to Commit Suicide to in order to change his future and cause a paradox against fixed time. He assures Amy that he could be ressurected and Joins him just as the Shinji the Slinky

(Bwaaaaa! Bwa-Bwaaa-Bwaaa!)

Thin Crust: See, The reason why we saw them get zapped right in front of their eyes which we commonfolk use to...you know, See Them... is Because Karen Gillan has made her desision about leaving the show Final!

Pan Pizza: So the Doc- Ya know what, I'm not even gonna call him that <Insert Insult name>

RebelTaxi Hates THE SNOWMEN (Old Monster Desecration)

I think I get it now, Moffat's Secret! I get why Blink didn't Focus on The Doctor and his companion at the time Martha Jones. I understand why Donna Noble was Trapped inside the Data Core away from the Doctor, I actually get the divorce subplot! River Song, Amelia Williams and Clara Ozwin Ozwald are all gimmick added to the show to keep < Rose Tyler > The Girl who Waited, The Doctor's quot-unquot "Wife", and now... the girl who died twice. They're merely gimmick to keep Rose around Moffat figured out how to cheat the system and let that bitch < Regeneraaaaaaate! >

Now do you see why this dickhole must be evacuated from the franchise...It's the Lucas Effect, he rocked then but he blows now...

RebelTaxi Hates THE BELLS OF SAINT JOHN (Frankenstory)

Hey, kids. Let's play Steven Moffat Bingo! Since we all know how ball-lickingly bad he's gotten at writing, I decided to create this Bingo Card with every element from Moffat's other stories each having a shot of an alcoholic beverage to help calm your nerves. There's a lot of contribance to watch and alot of Booze to Drink so let's take a look at The Bells of Saint John.

In the Prequel, The Doctor Encounters Clara as a little Girl...

It's bad enough when I have to take a shot this early, now Moffat's soiled one of Amy's few defining gimmicks! (Takes a shot)

The plot's kind of like the Idiot's Lantern, y'know the 2012 Olympics? As we see a warning from the Internet except the members of said internet is trapped with their computer webcam or something...God! A Blink reference, really? Your award winning story from when he didn't suck is getting shoehorned into this mess. Sorry, Steve-O... that's another shot against you. (takes a shot) Is copying your own work plagerism or fetish...

And that was the Bells of St John. (gets cross-eyed) Nope, need a minute. < Emergency Stomach Pump Session > it's shit! It plagiarised a story we have already seen in the idiots lantern, it spits in the face of River Song by all the flirting on screen with Clara, and the villains were a concept more suited for a 90s comic script for the Tick. And considering how many times actors return to Dr Who as new and more plot integral characters (the Brigadier, Gwen Cooper, Martha Jones, etc.) I don't really feel the impact of THIS COMPANION who died twice... Hell even Colin Baker was brought back to be the DOCTOR!!! the actress playing Oswin then goes on to play a character called Clara... I don't see a big deal to start bringing this up now. Also if was first named Oswin in her first life, then Clara in her second life, why is she Clara again? Her character concept is a plot hole in of itself...!!

RebelTaxi Hates THE NAME OF THE DOCTOR (OMGWTFGENIUS!)

This was Balls, This entire series of Doctor Who was flat-out Chicken Balls. To watch Moffat's earlier work especially Curse of Fatal Death knowing the shit I know now is just dissapointing. To even look at Steven Moffat's Face since the whole dang season has passed is painful to me. It is why I use the Image of Sayaka to represent him. She delt with stress and fell into darkness, Just like Moffat but at least she wasnt aware of what Octavia Von Sekkendoff has done in her existance.

Moffat has Made every story of series 7 its own blockbuster. And Moffat's Stories as of Late have been known for Angering the Fanbase in Three Ways, Jumping the Shark, Nuking the Fridge and Frying the Coke.

And the Moffat Era has been Very Crappy Thus Far with Walking Gimmicks, Inconsistant Time Lords and Plot Holes the size of the Grand Canyon but we have yet to experience the big moment series seven has been building up towards, The Moment Doctor Who Fries the Coke! I dont think It's gonna happen here tonight and Moffat's acctually being clever for -What's this?

Wait a minute, this could be it. The Doctor seems to be swallowing his pride.

He's standing there sadly...

Could this be the Frying the Coke Moment

Yes! Yes!

And we're safe! They did not reveal the Doctor's Name at all, and thank god. Cause that could have fried the coke big time.

Oh, dear... The Shark Chart's off the scale...

And there it goes, It hit the Highest Setting of Jumping the Shark, Coming Back to Shoot in the Nads, Rape it, Eat it's flesh, consume it soul, mount it's head on the wall and rinsing and repeating the process on twelve other goddamn sharks just to be safe! Johnny Hurt is living proof that Doctor Who Needs Saving! So keep tweeting the Hashtag #DisneyWho to ensure that No further Jumping the Shark Moments Occur and the Fans Have a say in the Production of the Franchise.

RebelTaxi Hates THE DAY OF THE DOCTOR (TYLER!)

You know what, I take it all back... Everything I said about... 'Mels' and the Rose Tyler Gimmick-Clones... All of it... I take everything back... Because I knew somehow it was gonna get worse...

and worse...

and worse...

and worse...

and worse...

and God-Jeaaabust! I'm sure you can forgive me for the hell I raised, Right Whoniverse... You're not gonna ruin the Anniversary for everyone right? Please... :(

And that was Day of the Doctor, Oh my christ... That certainly was a Wild Ride though Space and Time.

RebelTaxi Hates THE TIME OF THE DOCTOR (Pray for Petey)

Poor Matt Smith. He's proven to be one of the most Magnificent Actors to play the Doctor. He has had a stellar freshman year, but was screwed into a rather iffy sophamore year, an absolutely retarded junior year and a rather confusing Senior Year. But it all has to end somewhere and what better way to Graduate than in the confines of a Christmas Special. I kinda wanna see the Doctor Who christmas specials on the Isle of Misfit Christmas Specials on Platypus Comix. I also wanna see a fourth Policy Trailer Jamboree.

RebelTaxi Hates .--.

RebelTaxi Hates GOSEI SENTAI AKIBARANGER (Humiliation)

The Seventeenth Super Sentai, the one that was snubbed by it's American cousin Power Rangers and for good reason. We're taking a look at Gosei Senta-I F**king Hate Akibaranger!

5 reasons why TOEI must dump SABAN BRANDS

Prologue

Greetings, People of Youtube.

5: Greed

Budget Restraints.

• huh*

What this means is: they can choose to do just about anything to save some money for their bottom line.

• Huh*

4: The "Power Ups"

So, the nerdy Noah transforms into the badass Gokai Blue? And Jake into Green is kinda fitting, KINDA. Because Jake is the jokester, but he's not clumsy... Right, Don?

First off, A "Power Up" should enhance the look and the abilities of the current rangers. Second, Why do they have to change suits only to change to another suit? Third, Kibaranger with the Zyurangers pretty much worked out 'cuz they both have bestial motifs (dinosaurs for Zyuranger, mythical beasts for Dairanger). But Gokai Silver with the Goseigers? The pirate motif isn't really anywhere near to the angel motif... And the Main Problem, This version of powering up diminishes the well designed suits of the Gokaiger and essentially skips a full group of heroes! Henceforth, I Hereby Propose a new Law for adapting Power Ranger Teams to prevent this sheer lazyness, All Ranger Teams must be their Own Seperate Entity. I notice the Zordon Era has a special Problem. Dont worry, the Masterplan in this Bright Red Folder Donated from an Anonymous source has all the Answers. And Yes, This TARDIS Blue Folder also has a masterplan that will also be Important.

It's Funny because Toei Explicitly demanded that no Sentai shall be skipped, the fact that Saban Found this Loophole Agri-vates the Toku Faithful to no end.

3: Nickelodeon's Greed

Here's that first mistake that screwed everything up for fandom. I ran into a little kid in a Power Rangers T-Shirt one time at my Local Wal*Mart and said to me, "Where are the Power Rangers? Where did the go?" Guess which Red Ranger I spotted on said shirt, Jaden Shiba! I directed him to the local TV Tropes where he can get learned about The franchise beyond the Samurai Rangers and he would be humiliated and publicly insulted by Local Veterans of the Power Rangers Fandom. This is what two consecutive Twenty-Episode Seasons do to our generation. Why would they order only twenty episodes when clearly there's more than double that amount in Stock Footage. I'll give you a hint, Who's Bright Yellow, Peaked with a Movie, and Lives in a Pineapple Under the Sea. And that's not all el orange couch has done to add insult to injury, We also can also blame it for the Dissapearence of Power Rangers from Vortexx. Oh, Spongebob, Ruining the lives of his neighbors one day at a time.

2: Disney's Changed

And now, we have a new segment on the Show called < Kid-Vid! Slowly Dying, but still sorta okay > In 2001, they were given a choice, Ultimately Haim only wanted a huge pile of money to further his political goals and so he handed over the whole dang Ship to Buena Vista, One of the Walt Disney Company's Corporate Lap Dogs. We could have seen much better seasons in the Kalish Era, SPD would have been Epic, Mystic Force would have been Magestic, Operation Overdrive...would have been Watchable! But no, they Watered it down with explosions and Censorship, only letting up just so they could stuff it in the cupboard that they called ABC Kids.

But that's the thing with Disney, they didn't buy Saban for Saban. They Bought It for ABC Family, Everything Else they got was Junk to lock away into the vault, Even the Rangers! It was only saved from the void of obscurity by the Suggestion to film their Series in New Zealand where they Ironically ban Power Rangers, I might add. And to Top it all off, this half-hearted purchase became the catalyst for Michael Eisener's Removal from Office and the beginning of Iger's reign in the Magic Kingdom. If they were to give Power Rangers a Second Chance with Bob in control, They would welcome the franchise back with open arms and a clearer, Kalish-Free head.

1: Gangnam Girls

If the Internet is whining about how what the name would be applied to then you're officially Ruined Forever. The Name "Gangnam Girls" is More Freakin' Dated than a Transformer with an Afro, like, is it a disco ball? er... how do you transform with that thing? Huh? You'd think It would be one of those 4Kids-type dubs with that specific kind of Suck but clearly nothing good can come of their works when the name alone has the potential to doom the anime industry in America. Goodbye, Toonami ...again: Hello, World War III. I've said it before in the much less mature first draft of this video. Laziness can be excused, World-Threatening Racism cannot. The fact that we live in a world where the assumption that Asians are all the same could trigger the end of aforementioned world should be some cause for alarm. But if this Abomination comes in to ruin our day, We're History. Obviously something is wrong with the brilliant men who recruited five fantastic actors to portray that one group of Courageous Teenagers with additude since the day Murdoch left the Blokes at Buena Vista to gunt up his fridge and burn his house down with lemons, Because their age and the age of the rest of the fine folk at Saban Brands is as obvious as it can get with Gangnam Girls.

Epilogue

And those are my Five Problems with Saban Brands, But there is some good news, If you didn't hear me back with the Power Up Segment, A good fellow has handed me a Masterplan for Funimation should they get Motivation from the Fans and Rider Kick The 64-year-old virgins at Saban Brands back into the Nightosphere whence it came.

Cartoon Network Pilots

Scedule

Mars Safari fizzles out at 12

My Science Project disgusts the childrens at 12:15

Mystery Roomies echoes an old friend at 12:30

Steven Universe shows it's stripes at 12:45

Clarence drags us down at 1

Lakeford County Turbo picks us back up again at 1:15

Wolf's Rain sinks it's teeth into the 1:30 slot.

Super Pig slips through the cracks at 2

We'll top it all off with Fanime Selects at 2:30

--

Six Hours that are anything but wasted.

Exchange Student Zero

Recap

So, our story begins with a couple of losers fighting with trading cards and flailing arms around like there's no tomorrow. These two clowns are half of our foursome of protagonists: Bigbee and Coconut Head here are welcoming a foreign exchange student from Japan named Hiro.

DeeP DiSH: Or at least they would be if they weren't such annoying Weeaboos.

1:16-1:25: Oh, no. Duel Monsters is life and death, Bakugan is life and death, Bayblade is life and death, this thing is just a generic children's card game.

Bigbee shows off a booster pack he got in a one-off deal from a strange website and it yeilds some rare cards by the same cinematic dumb luck you'd see in any show. I mean, look at this spread! Ninja Prince of Karuta, Happy Peach Flower, Admiral Crunch!?

2:42-2:46 DeeP DiSH: Thank you, Matilda!

At school we meet this guy who-

3:28-3:40 DeeP DiSH: Wasn't sure I'd find a character dumber than Donald Drumpf, but... here I am.

3:58-4:06 DeeP DiSH: Urkel-grade nerd blackface, this is. And I am damn sick of it.

-Nerdface-

The Principal organized this exchange student scheme to transplant Hiro's 180 IQ into the most broken school systems on the face of the earth and sending his grade-school age son to fend for himself in a foreign High School. That is Gendo Ikari Grade cruelty if I ever saw it but it's not enough to put you on the list.

5:47-5:58 DeeP DiSH: Oh, that's adorable! You actually think you're the protagonist, how quaint!

No, it's actually this familiar-looking Yu-Gi-Oh! Reject. Hi, Ninja Prince of Karuta!

7:30-7:42 DeeP DiSH: I'll take 'Why the hell am I not panicking about this' for 2600, Mr Trebek.

After we meet his Animal Mascot Companion with laserbeam eyes, we end our first look at the school with the sharing of the anime sword!

9:04-9:16 DeeP DiSH: If you intend to get rid of it. I hear selling it on Craigslist is a good Idea... 's what I'm doing with mine.

8:30-8:40 DeeP DiSH: Wow, look! A Wall Thing!

Hiro explores his new home and we have money-saving inner monologues to parody.

8:40-8:44 DeeP DiSH: *Glances at the pile of wrecked DeeP DiSH Units then shrugs*

8:44-8:52 (CM Punk: You're not funny)

It's clear that this is one of those shows,

The Electric Piper

Thesis

Okay,

Recap

South Park Kickstarter

Do you like nickelodeon? Well, Have we got an Idea for you, a Roast of the first kids network from your favorite white trash redneck mountain town South Park! The Laziness and Racism of Saban, Overreliance on Spongebob, good shows being forgotten by the network and so much more will be covered by this episode. The title of the episode: Super Megasuck, But we need your help to make it happen. If you donate some money to fund this special episode of South Park or if you Tweet the hashtag #SuperMegasuck to Trey and Matt's Twitter Accounts and other Twittermen with strong ties to South Park and get the guys to actually acknowledge this movement, we could see a true game changer for Nick. I dont expect to see this be a success but if it ends up raising the $64,000 needed for a single episode, I will surely be amazed. I'll be doing extra incentives for this project, $86,000 - Tara Strong as Trini, The Original Yellow Power Ranger, as in the one with the vacant role, to sum up, she'll have a voice similar to Twilight Sparkle and Illana from Sym-biotic Titan as that's far closer to Trini than whover Saban Picked up for the show. $100,000 - Live Broadcasting not just on Comedy Central, but also on Nickelodeon where the sponge sleeps... Speaking of the Sponge, $128,000: Tom Kenny and company join the jamboree

Sonic Boom X (How we'd salvage Sonic Boom)

Alright, last time we visited the Blue Blur. They've been reduced to tending to mobius' elderly, with their franchise ultimately being the centerpiece which, due to Bill Friedberg's stellar writing and quality pedigree, has found sadly itself on life support. But there's a way to save the franchise from the mobile's nasty kiss. May I introduce Sonic Boom X: The starting point today's potential fans of the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise deserve! We'll be breaking down what needs to happen in the show, arc by arc, and figure out which of Sonic's comrades from throughout the franchise from the Games to the Comics. The Goal is to provide a great new jumping in point for incoming franchise newcomers and to pretty much succeed where Bill and his cronies beaten and bashed said franchise into a bloody lifeless pulp. With that out of the way, let's discuss potential showrunners.

DeeP DiSH: Personally, in terms of showrunners. I'd go with Ken Penders, He was one of the Sonic Writers I grew up with reading the Comics.

Step One: The Blue Blur Arc

Size: 3 episodes

THiN CRUST: So the first Arc is going to be a three episode introduction to Sonic's character as well as the Major Plot Device of the series, The Star Egg, an Interstellar Amusement Park that saw the earthbound area developed into Robotropolis, with more and more area being built over the natural landscapes the longer Robotropolis stands, the environment suffers because of it, but that's a minor detail here, wouldn't want this to go all Captain Planet on us, now would we. Sonic and Tails are relaxing in their island home with Amy Rose, but then along comes Sally Acorn, Princess of a Kingdom imperiled by the overgrowth of Robotropolis, to find Angel Island and see if it's untouched by Robotropolis' noxic spread. Sonic decides not to do that but to take the battle head-on by himself, Ending Episode One.

DeeP DiSH: Episode Two begins with a montage of the best levels of Sonic the Hedgehog 1-4 and Knuckles. Green Hill, -Ice Level-, -Ruins Level-, The Works. And it leads Sonic to Robotropolis where he meets the Freedom Fighters, Antoine, Rotor, Bunnie, -, and Nicole. The Band of Heroes venture across the Kingdom of Machines to reach the centerpiece of this Robot Apocalypse waiting to happen. We catch a glimpse at another couple Hedgehogs at the end of the episode, one pitch black with silver streaks, another who is silver all around. These two are members of the Cult of Lyric: A group of Mobians sworn to keep the eponymous Child of Solaris sealed away in a temple which was ripped from the Lost Hex to be the centerpiece of the Star Egg's hub area. We end the episode with a shot of the temple and the glowing red seal on the shrine.

THiN CRUST: Episo- no.

DeeP DiSH: But Boss!

THiN CRUST: No means No, I am not reading this!

DeeP DiSH: I promise it's not as convoluted as it is with their native games!

THiN CRUST: But the games you're referencing in this episode are nothing but Jokes!

DeeP DiSH: It'll work.

THiN CRUST: What?

DeeP DiSH: I wrote the scenarios from the memory I have from marathoning Sonic Let's Plays and Sonic Dissected, I have researched every wiki page in the Sonic News Network Wiki, I have read the Sonic Comic during the later part of Ken Penders' time with the comic. It'll Work.

THiN CRUST: ...fine. But don't complain if we lose subscribers. Episode Three's where the Major Character Conflict of the series comes into play, Sonic believes that Eggman's perfectly content with overcharging people for a vacation at a five-planets-in-one interstellar resort, while Tails is hesitant to trust 'Ol Egghead. They don't have time to think about this as two of the Deadly Six are pursuing Wisps in what appears to be an attempt to get a free annual pass at first because with prices this astronomical, who wouldn't want a decade pass to this park. But these clowns are actually seeking to use the wisps to break the seal placed upon their creator: wait for it... Lyric. Sonic rescues the wisps the two Ibla were chasing {Ibla? Oh, gimme a break...} and Sonic zaps out of their range and end up in front of Eggman whom they have chatted with during the start of the episode, he wants Sonic to surrender the Wisps to him in exchange for what amounts to two free years in Boom's version of Eggmanland, Sonic hesitates at first but Eggman insists that they'll be safe from the Deadly Six, but the tone is somewhat off, cluing Sonic into a more complex nature to Eggman's Facade. Sonic accepts the offer but the Lazer wisp warps him away again but makes a wrong turn towards the Tomb of Lyric, causing Sonic to slide brake himself across the floor... Smudging the seal that keeps Lyric in and the Deadly Six out.

<Cue Clip of Lyric's arrival>

Audio: Ah! Now you Fucked Up!

Step Two: Return to Mobius

size: 4 episodes

Long Story Short, Lyric curses Sonic with a special hex before shipping him off from the Western Galaxy, Which sets up our next segment of the Lyric Arc, which I have dubbed Return to Mobius where Sonic is Stranded on Earth for four episodes which is thankfully thirteen times shorter than the Original Sonic X. There we find out that Sonic is Cursed to walk the earth as a Warehog in the Moonlight while the rising sun grants him the form of the dominant species of this particular planet Lyric's sealed the blue blue away in. You already know what the dominant species is because you're watching this video, are you not? After wandering into the Thorndyke residence in the evening he meets Chris just as he does in the original series. When the Sun Rises, Sonic discovers the day part and gets himself dressed with whatever spare clothes he can find lying around. After a day at school where he meets Chris' friends, he tries to find a way back to Mobius, Going as far as drawing the same Rozmajin. Lyric inflicted onto him.

Step Three: The Child of Solaris

Size: 6 Episodes

Top 5 Smashers untouched by Sakurai

Animated Atrocities Score

• Gary Torture Porn: x$1 Billion
• Status Quo is God: x$1 Million
• Fatal Heart Attack Fuel: x$1 Million
• Mopey-Dopey Love Talk: x$128,000
• Patrick's A Prick: x$50,000
• Squidward Torture Porn: x$10,000
• Character Derailment: x$30-$3000 depending on importance of Character
• Hypocritical Moral: x$200

September 2013

Newcomer: DEEP DiSH

Arrival

EyEyEyEyEy! Which way do I go so that I can reach my home of-

DEEP DiSH: Who are you and what the Faiz are you doing in my grandma's TV?

Your Grandma's TV? Heh... I Applaud the RVT reference but...Your Grandma's TV?

DEEP DiSH: Yeah, I used to have this thing where I crashed at my grandma's place...Doin' it for old times sake so shut up!

Well, I won't till you point me to the way home, I got stuck in California by those Esquire Network bastards and I've been traveling ever since I picked up a few souvenirs from Texas as evidenced by my location in the previous review shown here.

DEEP DiSH: Wait, you're an Internet Critic?

Proud driver of the Rebel Taxi NiG0!

DEEP DiSH: How come I never heard of you?

Because I only have a subscriber headcount in the early triple digits...

DEEP DiSH: And you sure you can get me on That Guy with the Glasses.com?

I hope to get all the RT Bozos onto That Guy with the Glasses!

DEEP DiSH: How so? On that Inked Reality division they think they're gonna make?

Maybe!

DEEP DiSH: Yeah, guess it's better than nuthin'...

Yeah, If my Cinemark review doesn't get me on Pan's Good Side then the whole TGWTG business certainly-(sniffs) I sense a Disturbance in the force...and it coming from- Are you the DEEP DiSH guy I've been courting to add to my crew?

DEEP DiSH: You courted to join your crew, and it was unsuccessful 'til you managed to show up here with your magic trick. How'd you do that?

Well, I convert my body into electrical energy and I have to find a screen to stay on before I fizzle out of biomass and die so I usually recharge on any electrical gadget with a screen. That was where your Grandma's TV Screen came into the Picture! By the way for every state I made a video in, I pick up a few souvenirs so I hope you can carry them over.

DEEP DiSH: Well, I do all the Hard Work so... will do.

The Downfall of Nintendo (#DInACE)

Intro

This is going to be my most insightful video ever because I have a lot to say on this matter, I love Nintendo and I hope it'll stick around for 100 more years... But it won't unless we have some change upstairs, We're aiming to Kill the Beast ...metaphorically!

Animal Crossing: New Leaf

If you think Animal Crossing New Leaf is a satisfactory Game for the 3DS Lineup, you are sadly mistaken. Here's a Dissatisfied Customer who wants change in Nintendo's Kingdom in terms of her Animal Crossing adventures

The game was fun at the beginning when trying to unlock all the different shops and upgrading my house but once I caught or dug up everything, once all the shops were made, the game just got.... boring. Repetitive. Dull. I get there are people who like this game and I'm sure they probably still like it but I need more substance in the long run. I can't constantly play a game where I only get a few rewards of holidays and such threw out the year to make me want to keep playing. If this had more to do like mini games or some small manner of monster combat like if it was set in an RPG Fantasy world, it would be a lot more fun. As it is, its not my thing.

She Demolished her Town on a tuesday. Sad, All too sad...

Wii U Woes

You wanna know how many Wii U consoles have been sold so far... For the Chrystler, You already know this by now. I would love for Nintendo to make Mario games forever, but I also want the Wii U to be more than my Mario, Kirby or “Insert classic Nintendo character name here” console. I could quite honestly pop four AAs in my (still-working!) original Game Boy for that. I’m not the only one. Times have been tough for Nintendo. The company has been particularly hard hit by the rise of mobile games, which largely appeal to the same kind of lighthearted gamers as Nintendo titles. Comparisons to Sega, which had to switch from being a hardware company to a publisher after poor sales, are everywhere, especially after the company confirmed this week to GamesIndustry.biz that it’s selling the Wii U at a loss.

It's Current offering is Pikmin 3 and Let's face it, It isnt my cup of tea nor is it your. If I'm wrong and It is your cup of tea, I apoligize and more power to ya. But do we really want a new alliteration of Mario Kart or Smash Bros. Especially since all that's been goin' down upstairs. Games like The Wonderful 101, which was developed by Platinum Games and will be published by Nintendo, were great in demos. Nintendo’s also working to make using Wii U’s Game Pad controller a more integral part of the game, rather than the way it’s mostly been used up to this point, which is basically as a more convenient place to keep a map. And they're hoping to create a new franchise by aformentioned Mario Kart 8, That's a change that promises to get them back to Nintendo-like profits by 2014... That is, if it is in fact a new franchise...

Out of Touch with the Internet

Nintendo didn't want Smash to be at EVO at all, and the news that the broadcast was canceled came after a compromise with the EVO officials to at least allow the tournament to take place without the stream. Once the internet found out about this, the negative outcry was so great that Nintendo allowed the game to be streamed.

"Games, Not Art"

Star Fox Adventures is the result of this trope. Originally, the game was to be called Dinosaur Planet and had no ties whatsoever with the Star Fox franchise. Krystal and a male fox were the main characters. But since Nintendo was behind schedule with a Star Fox sequel, they forced Rare into changing the plot and characters around. The male fox was axed, Krystal was aged up and became the Distressed Damsel, and Fox McCloud became the hero of a game that had little to do with what he does best: flying around in space and blasting bad guys. Suffice to say many fans of the franchise still hate this game — even though it's not a bad game per se. But the meddling didn't stop at the concept phase. A rushed release date caused what could have been a climactic boss fight with General Scales to be completely cut. But the cut is extremely unnatural and jarring: the fight actually has its own arena and intro cinematic, and the fight itself actually lasts a second or two before it gets called off, and the player is left confused and wanting.

Super Mario Galaxy had a story built around the game that didn't interfere with the gameplay and gave players an insight on Rosalina's history. Most players liked the concept. However, when the developers tried to do it again for Super Mario Galaxy 2, Shigeru Miyamoto himself stepped in and wanted the story aspect to be scrapped because he wanted the game to be more focused on the gameplay itself like the NES games had done.

If that's not enough, He did it again with Paper Mario Sticker Star, saying a story wasn't needed (even though the RPG games have always been more story-based than the platformers) and requesting that they only use existing Mario characters rather than coming up with new ones. He also felt the game played too much like Thousand Year Door, which led to the battle system being completely revamped. Unfortunately, after the Base Breaking Super Paper Mario, many fans were hoping for a game that returned to the style of the first two games, so Sticker Star was dismissed by us, the fans.

Even the Zelda series has been victim of Miyamoto's story-phobia. Ever since Ocarina Of Time, the developers have tried to include more complex and detailed stories, only to be forced to stop and simplify the plot, even excluding major plot points (the whole point of the story of Four Swords Adventures was being the backstory of A Link To The Past, an idea that had to be scrapped, with the final product taking place sometime after Twilight Princess in the game's timeline (in the Child Link timeline branch) and having nothing to do with A Link to the Past (which is in a completely different timeline branch), which caused the series to have an even more convoluted timeline. Link's Crossbow Training is probably the most tragic example: the developers wanted to develop a full-fledged, epic Zelda game that would be to Twilight Princess what Majora's Mask is to Ocarina of Time, but Miyamoto forbid them from including a epic story—or a story of any sorts, bosses (sans a single one that the developers were allowed to put in after fighting for it), or large and immersive stages. This resulted in what's widely considered the weakest installment in the series (not counting the licensed CD-i games) both by fans and critics alike. Also, because of people uploading the Subspace Emissary cutscenes from Super Smash Bros. Brawl onto the internet, there will be no story cutscenes in Super Smash Bros. for Wii U and 3DS.

There were many Franchises that were aborted for their Icons. There was a game "Fluff's Yarn", starred a totally new character, Fluff. When the game didn't seem to be turning out very well, Nintendo suggested turning it into a Kirby game which we all know as "Kirby's Epic Yarn" and if that's not enough, Kid Icarus Uprising originally wasn't planned to have anything to do with the Kid Icarus series. Nintendo and Sakurai were just working on a Nintendo 3DS action game involving sky and land combat when they suddenly realized that Pit would be the perfect character for such a title. And once upon a time, an original fighting game with new characters by the name "Dragon King" was in the works. When they brought in Sakurai, he knew that fighting games at the time did not sell very well, he had the idea of using Nintendo characters. That Idea became the Super Smash Bros. Franchise... <Let it Sink in...>

Iwata carefully explained his position on development and Nintendo's role as an entertainment company. Saying that Nintendo makes Games, and that Video Games are not Art. As you can see, He's flipping retarded and he must be destroyed, at all costs. I plan to organize a little resistance movement called the Disney Infinity Allegence Committee of Exploitation or DInACE for short. We plan to hurt your bottom line not because we dispise the folks who rescued the gaming industry. Of course not, we just want you to get better!

<TOM explains Criticism>

And since Iwata-san cant take criticisim we must excrute him from his post and there is only one man to do it... or rather, one mouse.

That's Right, If it isnt obvious by the Acronym, We here at project DInACE Aim to have the Walt Disney Company perchase Nintendo so that they can:

1. Remove Iwata from the Company and get some new blood up in management
2. Have Disney start a Japanese Branch that will begin the Aquisition of a grocery list of Japanese Studios
3. Have Nintendo rise from the ashes of corporate cynacism and make commercially viable games again!

Phase One: The Resistance

The first thing we have to do here is to redirect all Nintendo-Based Investments to Disney Infinity, hitting Nintendo where it hurts. We all accept trading in Nintendo Stocks for Disney Stocks, Here's the Current Exchange Rate as of this Video.

Disney: $ 63.96

Nintendo: $ 15.83

Stock Rate: Around Four

Be sure to check every stinkin' day, the more Nintendo stocks you sell, the lower it's stock prices are gonna be. Back to Disney Infinity, Ranting Robots Bleep and Bloop explain how to get rid of that pesky Wii U fund.

<Disney Infinity Costs>

There are also Power Discs sold in blind packs for around five bucks eaches so boom! The emptied carcass of your entire Wii U Fund burninated one disc at a time. More figures and discs will be coming down the pipe and there are even retailers dealing out exclusive toys for this thing so buy the smeg out of this game, say it's for your kids, bring your actual kids for bonus points, Just buy into this great game because let's face it:

<Infinity Cash Cow>

You can also resist by going to Magic Kingdom Hearts, a special event at Walt Disney World's Not Quite Scary Halloween Party, specifically for fans of other ongoing Disney crossover franchise Kingdom Hearts. So yeah, Neither me nor Deep Dish will be attending for we have our own business to attend to. But we'll do a monthly DInACE Direct where we here at Rebel Taxi give you Information that shall Aid DInACE...Directly. Expect a few special guests from time to time as we dive into the Derp of Iwata San's mind and rescue Nintendo. It'll be greatly appreciated if any one of us were to star in and co-write an episode of South Park, It'll give us some exposure as to who we are and why we will not tone it down...

Phase Two: The Offer

Iwata has stated he'll try to get the company back to Nintendo-like profits by 2014. So if we foil his promise then he'll have to cave in to our demands, It'll take months for the deal to become legally stable so yes, you guys can still have your Kingdom Hearts III...I Hope. We're aiming for a $6.4 Billion dollar deal both in Cash and Disney stocks like in the Lucasfilm Deal and it must have Iwata leaving the company to move on to crack $#!- and I know the perfect place where you can stay when the deal happens... <Hobo Joe>

Step Three: The Rebuild

So now that Disney owns Nintendo, what happens now to all it's assets and properties? Simple, we flat out port 'em over to our ultimate tool that saved the day, Disney Infinity! We get Avalanche to develop a Developer's Kit for their game and ship them to All the 1st and 2nd Party Developers Nintendo owns and relegate them to Disney Infinity because they'd be better off making figurines than developing for an obviously outdated console they've been selling at a loss since it's launch day. I have a Masterplan for all Nintendo Properties should they go through with the big deal. After Nintendo finishes it's final farewell to the Console Market, It will be developing Playsets for Mario and two tastes of the Zelda Franchise (Ocarina and Wind Waker) Intelligent Systems will cook up Playsets for each country in Fire Emblem alongside a better Paper Mario Game. Hal will develop Kirby and Ice Climbers Playsets with Project Sora helping out whilst it Develops a Kid Icarus Playset alongside Smash Bros. for Infinity. Retro Studios would develop Metroid and Donkey Kong Country Playsets, Game Freak has six regions of Pokémon to port over as well as a Possible Seventh to Ring in the new Tools. Speaking of which, The Pokémon Company can develop a Playset for Pokémon's Rumble and Mystery Dungeon Series. Mario Kart, Mario Party, Warioware, the list goes on. But when the well runs dry, We've got Toy Boxes to Polish and a big old treasure trove of stories to adapt for new Playsets and such.

Outro and Events

I would like to thank you for sitting through my evil scheme and I hope you guys can assist in the Events I have planned, There's Magic Kingdom Hearts in October just as I previously mentioned...Then the release of the X-Box One and PS4 will be an event we call "Deep Hurting" In we explain the evils of Nintendo in excruciating detail to Nintendo fans, what little they have left, and sway them to Playstation, X-Box, Mobile Games, PC, anything but Ninty and for every Major Release Nintendo's got in store, we have Boycotts set up too. Pokémon X and Y wll have 'Pistols for Pokémon' Mario 3D World will have 'Rehash Relief' because let's all agree on this one, It's just Mario 3D Land with more Catnip. The Wind Waker HD remake isn't gonna sell consoles so lets call this one 'Heroes of Gaming' in honor of the one true hero of time! And I am afraid that 'The Smashtacular Battle' will be a Super Smash Bros. boycott and there's also a Mario Kart Boycott called 'Sidetracked' and the real punch to the nads here will be 'Occupy Hyrule'. Now that I have officially ruined the night <Awolnation - Kill Your Heroes> and you guys can join said fight not just with Disney Infinity but also with these T-Shirts I plan to make for each occasion. If you love Nintendo and think it could be better then hop aboard Rebel Taxi vs. Nintendo bandwagon and put Iwata-san back in his place!

Fandom Arson

3/7/15

• Food Fight: For being flanderized beyond all recognition and overall redemption, we condemn Mrs Turner to being re-tought the basics of cooking by Miss Akane Tendo. For the overuse of two unfunny jokes solely for the purpose of padding out the episode, we condemn writer -- to eat the results of said cooking. For the stereotypical notion that Fairies act like pop-culture spouting genies, we condemn the characters of Cosmo and Wanda to being sealed up in a slime lamp and an Orange couch respectively for representing everything wrong with Nickelodeon.
• Love Struck: For the homophobic overtones in the special's rancid morals, we condemn director Sarah Frost to be re-incarnated as the head-redded Stepson of Sir Jonathan Test. For the over-the-top clishe interpretation of the men and women of the world, writer Steve Marmel is hereby condemned to be re-incarnated as a blatant lesbian magical girl created as an inept attempt at replicating the awesome that is Homura Akemi. For spreading misaimed sexual behavior, we condemn this show's interpretation of Cupid to witnessing the fairly oddmovies' interpretation of Timmy Turner watching Tootie leave his life forever, whether it be in rage or death.
• Cosmonopoly: For not overseeing the regulation process of Cosmonopoly, the toy company who okayed the distribution of the game is hereby condemned to be taken over by Hasbro. For invoking the Spongebob style of Continuity, we condemn the writers to be guests of honor at a Spongebill YouTube Poop festival. And for not realizing how much Cosmo had ruined Wanda's life with that brief stint of Vehicular Manslaughter, we condemn Billy Crystalball to an episode of This is your Wish featuring Baltor.
• It's A Wishful Life: For storyboarding the purging of the good Timmy's non-existance had blessec the world, we condemn storyboard artist Dave Thomas to five years working at my local Wendy's. For not using the character of Miss Smartenhott in the final draft, we condemn writer -- to --. And for imagining Timmy Turner into existence, We condemn Butch Hartman, I mean: Number 1 to Solitary.

5/4/15

• Tentacollino: For keeping innocent lives away from their loved ones for the rest of time, King Ree is condemned to having the face of notorious Spongebob writer Zeus Cervas in my upcoming CGI sequel of Tentacollino. For trying and failing to recapture the same class of crazy as -rapper dog-'s rap solo in Titanic: The Legend Goes On, we condemn Cletus Razorteeth to become a main cast member of The Fairly OddParents from Season Twelve onward. And for Team Titanic, oh... You get the best punishment for a group with an ending such as yours. See, with your newfound immortality, you cannot grow old to tell your bastardized version of the tale of the Titanic, and without your crazy-arse framing device both movies are seemingly impossible. So you are condemned to helping the development of Los Angeloto on your fruity little Island so that the Doctor can have a badass parking space.

Fandy Handy Dandy Guide Reverse: The Time Traveler's Guide to 2013

Step 1: Those Kooky Hipsters

They like their bands hot before they're cool, so they blog it for the mainstream to see, just keep in mind that these hipsters might be Cultural Authoritarians in the later 2010s, so it's best to keep potential offspring from happening.

Step 2: Party Hardy

The Dark Knight Rises is a popular movie during the summer of this particular year and has naturally spawned a memorable villain, specifically for being a laughing stock in some way, shape or form... In this case, Bane's easily imitable voice.

Step 3: Time Lord Troubles

This is the year Matt Smith jumps ship from the Steven Moffat Lovey-Dovey Crazy Train of a Soap Opera Doctor Who has sadly become at this point in time. So whatever you do, do not spoil Peter Capaldi! Or else ripple effect-related bad vibes are gonna happen.

Step 4: 50 Shades of Lame

Stephanie Mayer's a Kinky little Cougar and an outright obsessive bitch, so avoid her at all costs unless you like the idea being the next shag puppet in her novels. And to be safe, run from anyone who considers 50 Shades of Grey as a work of literature.

Step 5: Star Trek into Yaoi

J.J. Abrams is known as the man who revived Star Trek, Star Wars, and Lyrical Nanoha. But the former of these three franchises were penned by the fuckers behind the Michael Bay Era of the Transformers Franchise and we all know its tied with the Xehanort Saga as one of the most intellectually bankrupt initial eras of a popular franchise ever to grace geek culture.

-Comic-

The answer, of course, is 9/11 Truther propaganda!

Step 6: Waifu Warzone

This is where Fire Emblem explodes in popularity due to the implantation of a Casual Mode, Shipping, Time Travelling Children who act as extra troops, Shipping, DLC featuring the three Smash Bros. Veterans of the Series, Shipping, and Avatar Customization... But mostly Shipping!

Step 7: Twerk it Hard

This is a fad that will be gone by 2020... that is, if you don't manage to fuck it up while you're stranded here! But the longer you recognize it as a thing kids today are probably doing makes you even more disgusted with the world with each passing recall.

Step 8: A Pokemon World

So the world leaders are gathered together in one place to discuss policies, refine trade agreements, and battle pokemon apparently.

Fandy Handy Dandy Guide Reverse: The Time Traveler's Guide to 2014

Fandy Handy Dandy Guide Reverse: The Time Traveler's Guide to 2015

How I'd Fix Sword Art Online

1: Fleshing Out the Game

Let’s make one thing perfectly clear, Aincrad is bland, repetitive and empty as Shit. No magic, no jobs, no long-range attacks, just a few axes and maces scattered across the many swords in the game. No gameplay variety whatsoever, you’re just a mook with a sword for Light Novel Boy to mow down in his travels. Without the cheap, VR gimmick in place, guys like Yahtzee, Jim Sterling, Angry Joe among others will tear it asunder as the Shittiest game of 2022. That proves that the writer knows jack shit about the golden rule: Show, don’t tell. Henceforth, I shall be fleshing out the systems of the Game.

Magic System: Elemental Spells, Status Buffs, You can enchant weapons with a weapon leveling system.

Other Weapons include guns, bows, whips, nunchucks, sai, tonfa, keyblades and all that shi-

Job System: Name as many final fantasy classes as you can.

And finally, a new feature called the Party System.

2: Party System

The Party System will be a huge incentive for

3: Asuna

4: Kirito

5: Tentacle Porn

Tentacle Rape.

Stop.

6: A Balanced Cast

7: The Premise

How I'd Fix Sailor Moon

6: Time Shenanigans

Let's not fool ourselves, Time Travel Stories are inherently impossible to get right, even the best out of any of the lot have their share of problems. Dragon Ball Z's Android Arc portrayed time travel perfectly in that time travel just does not happen but it's an alternative universe instead. So, we're just going to scrap the time travel aspect of Sailor Moon's lore altogether!

Fighting Foodons

Clip 1

DeeP DiSH: Would you believe that this Subway Sandwich is fifty percent chicken, fifty percent chinese fetus? Of course not, that would label me a conspiracy theorist and brand this show as Fake News. But you could see this as something out of a dystopia book like Sword Art Online's setting its universe up for with its overambitious hopes for virtual reality, and that brings our topic all the way to Anime and 4Kids Entertainment.

First appearing in the Manga Joint Comic BonBon in 1998 and making the Jump to Anime form in 2001, Fighting Foodons was licensed by 4Kids Entertainment for it's oft-reviled Fox Box project which Gen Z-ers like me look fondly upon for Sonic X and the '03 Ninja Turtles series. Fox Box, later 4KidsTV, is a block of ups and way way downs, but I have reason to believe that Fighting Foodons is one of the most unique shows of the Mon Wars with its finely simmered humor and yummy punny characters.

DeeP DiSH: Alright, I think I've gotten you hungry enough, Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, time to RiOT Loose with a Fandom Arson of Fighting Foodons Episode 4: You Wanna Pizza Me. Belts Up, Gang! We're about to land!

The episode begins with Clawdia exploring a Haunted House, searching for a pair of Foodons that live here. (1:14-1:31) just by seeing the character designs we see the premise of the show unfold.

(CH2=0:33-0:52) DeeP DiSH: And this is what makes Fighting Foodons so special in this age of insecurity, nowhere in this maturity obsessed TV cartoon culture would this stack of sheer silver-age crazy get off the ground today.

(CH3=1:00-1:10) We are currently looking at the dying gasps of the silver age of Family Animation. Struggling to emerge from the campy proceedural action shows like Street Sharks or Freakazoid, coping with the loss of the Spielburg Animated Universe, and riding high off of copying Pixar and Dreamworks, including the post-rennaisance Eisener administration at Disney. But is still a bit far for overarching stories in American TV Animation to become the norm in these parts, hence we have Japanese Anime picking up the slack.

(1:38-2:02) Leave it to the theme song to set the tone of this silly ol monster collect-a-thon. Its use of public domain music and adding lyrics establishes a quirky adventure series with a bit of a campy feel to it.

Cut to our main hero Chase and his companions reading up on the backstory of Flavio Flambet: the former keeper of the castle and a master chef of the Glutton Empire's royal family.

(2:59-3:30) Cuck NiNjA: I'd make a joke about how you spent too much time getting the perfect ingredients or do a rousing speech about imperfection for past actors from Doctor Who to recite at conventions... But this establishment is not allowed to give Tetsuya Nomura or Steven Moffat the benefit of association.

Naturally, he ends up going all Semour Asses and wastes his life waiting for something that'll never happen and now his Foodons are haunting the place.

(4:00-4:24) DeeP DiSH: I know my Danny Elfman so let me tell ya that if you're trying to be This is Halloween, Grim Grinning Ghosts you ain't.

Kayla gets kidnapped in the Crossfire and whiskey'd off to Flambet's. Hey, if puns are their only source of jokes, then I'm going through all the Puns I can get.

(5:11-5:30) DeeP DiSH: Playing around with expectations, well played.

With the bait on the hook, Chase and the gang seek out the villains. While Pie Tin is easily startled, Chase ain't having Clawdia's shit today.

(7:04-7:17) DeeP DiSH: Y'know. There's a Film Theory Episode in this little adventure, but I'm not too sure on if and when MatPat would have the Narcs to do it.

Pie Tin is cowering over the stock song as even the shifting of leaves is enough to make him jump.

(7:33-7:39) Cuck NiNjA: And now you're getting annoying.

The group soon finds trouble in the form of a Muk swarm and the group promptly flee from the Nintendo-brand cease and desist waiting to happen, knocking one of the burnt meatballs out of the food cart and into the range of... Frenchy Toast.

Clip 2

(0:22-0:28) DeeP DiSH: Please, you think he's gonna save yo ass, you're a dime a dozen. There's no reason for Chase to- (0:29-0:31) And you just won the Dumbass of the Year Award.

Despite the unconscious efforts of the show to end itself out of shame, Chase survives on account of the scythe merely being a sheet of Tin foil.

Cuck NiNjA: Maka Albarn shall frown upon thee.

And is rewarded with the pain usually reserved for his Seiyumate Escargoon

DeeP DiSH: And believe me when I say these kids have a lot of Seiyumates under the location squad lovingly dubbed the Anime equivalent of the Beeb.

They tend to re-use the same voice actors over and over throughout its decade plus of service and you can tell who's who from the accents they use. The more iconic roles and characters they have under their belt, the easier it is to pick them out of the crowd. Perfect example being Maddie Blaustein, the late voice of Meowth, turning up here as this wise 'saucerer' named Haoji Oslo. Amy Pallant voices Kayla, even Ted Lewis turns up again as Jack Makunouchi, Great Master Chef and Father to Two-to-Four Beautiful Children.

DeeP DiSH: Yeah this was before dub twins were banned from the Yggdrasil's restoration efforts, but after the crash so... Yeah.

After a light scorching of Frenchy-Toast, he guides the crew to the haunted mansion where they, by chance, freed a ghost to make them beetl- Erm, sorry. Out of context loop. ...as Kayla tries to get out but to no avail.

(2:34-2:46) DeeP DiSH: I've a Script Goof, poor fellas. Scripting Goof, Let's Throw... it in trash!

Predictably, they are tormented by a will-o'-the-wisp and shuffling objects, only finding solice in trick mirrors

(4:06-4:11) Miki: You call those haunted mirrors, we've got real haunted mirrors that can tell the future, right future me?

Future Miki: Well, we've survived two full terms of a Trump Presidency, hell, even thrived in it, so yeah. We're doing okay up here.

Nanasama: Thank you.

Clip 3

The group are led to Master Slice, armed with a real metal scythe this time and with No Turtle Dudes to to properly fight them, the chefs decide to break out the meal tickets just as I'm ready to break out the Gordon Ramsay Jokes.

(1:17-1:30)(1:57-2:10) -Gordon Ramsay Insult-

(2:18-2:35) -Gordon Ramsay Insult-

(2:45-2:52) -Gordon Ramsay Insult-

(3:02-3:22) Kyoko: This is getting exciting!

Future Kyoko: Ehhh... I've seen better.

They kick his hide, Omlette breaks out Kayla and the spirit of Master Flambet shows up again to visit who he views as Princess Cupcake. Oh, and spoilers, by the way.

Clip 4

(0:30-0:45) Karin: I would've waited til Kayla was more... developed... if I were Clawdia, but hey, you do you. Least you didn't bring out Sargeant Sidedish again.

Oslo states the moral of the story to Flambet and Kayla tastes and enjoys the perfect pizza that harlot cupcake walked out on.

(1:57-2:07) St. Peter: It's about damn time.

This was a servicible episode of a show that's very underlooked. Once you get past the generically cheesy premise and starchy 4Kids humor, you're sure to get a good taste of a show that can stack up with the finest culinary masterpieces in television on par with names like Bobby Flay, Adam Richman, Guy Fiarri, and obviously Gordon Fracking Ramsay. It can also be a look into what the modern cartoon community is insistant avoiding and thus are currently suffering because of it both in the terrible shows and the shows we take for granted.

(CH3=1:13-1:24) DeeP DiSH: Trying to appease these straw activists who only exist to drain the joy out of every corner of entertainment, well, that just makes you...

Cuck NiNjA: A Cuck Sandwich.

DeeP DiSH: Exactly.

Regular Customer

Virtuoso Girl: Hi, I'm Joselyn Davies, creator of the Sonic Sins Series where Captain THiN CRUST is a regular guest to rake in extra cash to pay off his tragic underuse. This particular segment is made to rank the targets on a particular category, today's being Anime.

Marin: That's right, today shows a MIAMAFV surprise as Gigi is uncerimoniously knocked out of second place by this new episode of Fighting Foodons. But there is still a chance for DeeP DiSH to pick out another episode to redeem itself, the best in the show is still Persia while the Suzuki Septuplets are watching their Seiyumate Clawdia fail to nab our crew of Foodons from the dead center of the chart. The bottom two remain the same, Charming Invaders sit on the edge of Meh that's the farthest away from Space Pirate Mito's abysmal pilot.

Rudy's First Adventure v. Dimmsdale Daze

DeeP DiSH: (Is Rewinding to and fro across several different episodes of the Fandom Arson Program.)

---

(in another room)

THiN CRUST: So you're a CuCK NiNjA.

CuCK NiNjA: yep.

THiN CRUST: Serving under Soros.

CuCK NiNjA: yep.

THiN CRUST: How long have you been looping?

CuCK NiNjA: A thousand years.

THiN CRUST: Great, so you're younger than the both of us. How that Soros servatude going for ya?

CuCK NiNjA: He's Dead!

THiN CRUST: Get out! Really?

Sans: Bwahahaha!

CuCK NiNjA: Yeah, it turns out it is not the best idea to ask Akane Tendo to cook your meals when she isn't Awake.

THiN CRUST: Surprised that didn't crash your loop. Well, we've already gotten ourselves a woman's touch. Would'nt hurt to have some extra muscle.

CuCK NiNjA: It would be my pleasure.

---

The Episode itself

DeeP DiSH: Mister Tabootie, If you are recieving this transmission then you have probably been activated for the Infinite Loops. Henceforth, I shall prove to you how much better your show is than your sibling show: The Fairly OddParents.

Initially Launching on the very first episode of Oh Yeah! Cartoons in 1999 and getting your own show three years later. Chalkzone is the second spin-off from the Second of Frederator's Talent Incubators following our other subject the Fairly OddParents. It's premise is simple, A Child is equipped with magic chalk that can draw things into existance within a world made from chalk and thinks up creative solutions to whatever problems he approaches, whereas the other show's main protagonist just wishes it away at the tail end of the episode. Mister Tabootie has a loving, supportive family whereas Mister Turner's Parents were crushed at the sight of a Son. Rudy has two friends that provide an interesting dynamic which lasts all four seasons whereas Timmy's Dynamic with his fairy godparents fizzles out in the second season.

DeeP DiSH: And I have full intent on telling you every reason why I want you all to hunt down and binge this show yesterday. Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, Time to RiOT loose with a Fandom Arson of ChalkZone episode 1: Rudy's First Adventure with minor peeks at the Fairly OddParents Episode 153b: Dimmsdale Daze. Belts up, Gang. Because this is just the beginning.

The Episode starts off establishing the mother and father right out of the gate. (CH1=0:58-1:12) Already they prove more endearing than a good 80% of couples in the Fairly Oddparents, even canon ones like Chloe's parents. (CH2=0:48-0:51) (Reactionary Vine) And Checkerboard wipe to Chalkzone where Rudy is being carried off by a giant ass canary, Best Bef Snap chugging along just to keep up.

(CH1=1:37-1:45) DeeP DiSH: I like this turn of events, proves that while Rudy is quite resourceful and keen at quick-thinking, he's not infallable in the slightest. Unlike Mister Turner who is... (CH2=0:21-0:39) Downright Evil.

Snap pulls the breaks on the train but that unfortunately pulls the chalk from Rudy's grasp just as the Train Crashes into a literal sandbox. Did I mention that this world is made from erased chalk drawings? Just ask this lady in a bathtub.

(CH1=2:21-2:38) DeeP DiSH: CAAAAAAT!!! Hehehahahah.... Always wanted to say that.

Rudy is then tossed in with the younglings who litterally hatch just as Snap runs through the arctic fiddling with the chalk to no avail.

(CH1=3:07-3:11) DeeP DiSH: Mainly because he is an organic being whereas you are made of... well, chalk. Nice way to establish bits of the show's logic, episode as opposed to Dimmsdale which states its rulebook to the audience. (CH2=2:11-2:14)

Snap takes the skystairs to find Rudy stuck in the birdhouse and through some quick thinking, uses the big arse floor as a springboard to launch himself in to pain-enducing results. (CH1=3:46-3:50) Go home, Mister White. You're dunked.

The Cat leaps in, Canary bites its tail, both homeboys are flung at such a velocity that would do wonders on their endurance ranking on Death Battle.

(CH1=4:15-4:19) DeeP DiSH: It's the first few minutes of the first episode, of course he'll be okay. (CH1=4:26-4:37) See...

The Show flashes back two years to explain the roots of Mister Tabootie while Chloe's body flashes forward twenty to get to the Dimmsdale Daze carnival which requires parental supervision because of course it does.

(CH2=2:25-2:40) DeeP DiSH: If you find this kids too out of control for your tastes, good for you, that means you've experienced having kids.

Immediately we recognise the talent of this clearly younger Rudy as he ends up at the mercy of the dimwitted Reggie Bullnerd who forces Rudy out of a Quarter by sheer strength.

(CH1=5:28-5:33) DeeP DiSH: And he didn't have to resort to a fangirl's blatant shipping to become likable.

Rudy heads to the chalkboard to manifest his frustrations in an artistic manner, only for Reggie to slam him with the kind of Criticism you'd see in the YouTube comment section.

(CH1=5:49-5:55) DeeP DiSH: And a good inhaler of asthma-causing chalkdust, too!

We meet Mister Walter and his reaction to the drawing is what you'd expect from someone teaching for grades three and up.

(CH1=6:07-6:15) DeeP DiSH: Oh, look. It's the Globalist Cover for their plans to dismantle free speech.

After repeating a depressing sentence, Rudy comes across a glowing stick of Magic Chalk that just so happens to have manifested IRL-

DeeP DiSH: as opposed to manifesting within the Ma-(Shuts his Mouth) Spoilers.

and draws a hole into ChalkZone, leading Snap to his Creator with a dreaded Bully Nerd on his hide.

(CH1=7:06-7:15) DeeP DiSH: I know, right? Dunking off a dude with just a Horseshoe seems as stupid as... (CH2=3:26-3:43) Nah, that ain't stupid and to be honest with ya... (CH2=4:05-4:17) Yeah, I agree with ya, that's... just plain creepy. (CH2=4:17-4:20)

We get our first use of Rudy's Chalk Rope to cause an even greater amount of damage and Snap drops an infobomb about the premise.

(CH1=7:45-8:01) DeeP DiSH: And we've got another Forum Weapon.

(CH1=8:01-8:08) DeeP DiSH: I can think up creepier things. (CH2=5:01-5:16) Yeah, like that... (CH2=5:26-5:34) *Facial Reaction* (CH2=4:18-4:20)

Rudy and Snap are chased into the familiar winter wonderland from the present day and draw the skyward stairs from then as well, all the way to Snap's kind knockback creating the springboard at the end.

(CH1=8:49-9:01) DeeP DiSH: Oh, how I pity you, Tabootie. At least your best friend's dad doesn't have the hots for you, like... (CH2=6:21-6:31) Yeah.

Bully Nerd dives into the tub where Rudy doodles a Shark Fin which Rudy immediately sketches the rest of when it catches on.

(CH1=9:25-9:29) DeeP DiSH: A Walking (CH2=7:10-7:16) Autism in a Nutshell.

As we see the bath lady chase the shark and bully nerd chase the duo, we can see the creativity flow with each chase scene. Each and Every episode of this show has some pretty creative settings and all of them fit with the logic of a child having drawn it into a stone surface before being washed out in some way or another, It's a decent asthetic on point with a Rocky and Bullwinkle toon. And the logic of this show, you can't just draw bars around a guy and call it a prison. Why, you ask?

(CH1=9:57-10:02) DeeP DiSH: Clever show.

A Simple Teeter-Totter attack gives the Bully Nerd the hint to launch Rudy back into his home reality just in time for Reggie to swipe away the Chalk. Rudy's response?

(CH1=10:45-10:50, 10:53-11:16) DeeP DiSH: You just brutally murdered a chalk dude by slamming the proverbial door in his face. And this hasn't this been used more frequently because?

-Conclusion-

This is a beautiful show and I want more folks to see it so that they know that its a beautiful show, the art style makes logical sense for the world that they've created, the pacing and action is heart-poundingly swift when it needs to be, and man are the characters hella-enjoyable unlike some other nicktoon that I know. It's easily one of the best nicktoons out there and if you don't believe me, take a look at how much it surpasses hidden gems like Catscratch or The Xs and outright blows Mr. Meaty out of the water. This is one of those shows that make you think about the laws of the land, like so...

(CH1=8:16-8:21) DeeP DiSH: Well, he is the lone organic standing here, but his lungs degrade somewhat after eightteen straight hours causing asthma and temporary lung cancer... Twenty hours ends up getting taste-buds flowers for algernon'd, twenty-two sees intestines and nerves simmer and stall, and a full day turns your entire fucking body into chalk... bone, muscle, tissue and all. *Horrified realization* what else is on? (CH2=7:31-7:43) *Pukes up blood* Once upon a time, there was a talentless hack who thought he could get away with producing a one-dimensional greedy dastard of a punk as the main character, then bury him underneath what was initially a straight-up Mary Sue before making a right turn into an easily insufferable bitch that caused her regressed parents to gain Cosmo and Wanda who were barely in this fucking episode! (CH2=9:20-9:32) And all in a season that plays it safe when the show is known for taking risks! Not as much as its younger, shorter-lived brother, but risks are risks. But now, the sheer brattiness of those children has made me Yak Blood... and ya'll know the rules with looping critics and shitshow bloodbaths!

Critics: All Blood Belching Branches will be slaughtered shitless by every Loopy-bodied critic in the bar.

DeeP DISH: That's right, you're getting the beating of a lifetime, Hartman. All the way down to our Hundredth Fucking Episode! GOOD FIGHT! GOOD NIGHT! AND STAY FROSTY FOR YOUR OWN SAKE, BUTCH! YOUR ASS IS COMING DOWN!

Kiwi: Run, Butch, Run. Run like the wind.

Birth of a Salesman (Jimmy Neutron)

DeeP DiSH: Mister Neutron, to say your archival hasn't aged well is an understatement. You've become the centerpiece of memes and jokes for the sake of making fun of how crappy this show is. I say this because Robbie is forcing me to aim my scythe at my first episode from your series out of his irritation at this particular show.

Released in 2001

Marvel Mastery

There are two forces among the Marvel Universe at each other's throats right now, There's the Marvel we know and love with Gwenpool, Spiderman Renew your Vows, and rising star Miss Marvel. And there's the SJW cancer that panders only to an audience that will never read a comic book out of spite, key example being Riri Williams: a supervillain in the making designed to check off Teen Black Girl off their list, America Chavez: A clearly racist BLM Terrorist built under the guise of 'Liberal Activism', and Dan Slott handcuffing himself to the Core Spiderman Book through thick and thin to turn Spidey into an Iron Man wannabe since Tony's bumped out to shove Riri in to predictable results.

There is a way to remove the cancer from Marvel, and it lies in who owns Marvel these days. In 2008, Disney purchased Marvel Entertainment for 4 Billion Dollars and plenty of guys and gals have been wondering: What does Marvel have to do with Disney? This is the masterplan we're working towards piecing together by heading into Gwenpool's world, bringing a few select ongoings together like Spiderman: Renew your Vows, Moongirl and Danger Dinosaur and Squirrel Girl, the character, not the ongoing, that shit needs to die in a fire. Then you totally nuke Marvel down to Zero!

From there, you build a foundation, something to keep the Disney branding in mind while also keeping with the Marvel tone. With this motivation, we dunk our prices to a $1.80 for new talent and $2.70 for seasoned veterans. But the universe in question is more or less gone for good...ish but that's a bridge to be crossed down the line. What matters is the core titles must scream Disney Magic and the best place to start is to say 'out with the capes and spandex, in with the wings and Leotards.'

NEWS

Report

-News-

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Beast

Breaking news from Yggdrasil, The Villaniue Branch getting a lotta lovin' in terms of data archival. Anon E Mouse Jr. reports that Christopher Potts has been Activated and has been introduced to the system by Anchor of the KND Branch Nigel Uno Agent Numbuh One of the Kids Next Door organisation for combatting adult tyranny. Following a snip which featured resident Anchor Belle meeting Adam, he's the Looping prince of the Branch, in full Green Lantern garb, I'd show ya the snip but that's for another time. What's interesting is the recurring problem that's made itself evident with the snips to follow, take a look.

-snip-

Yep. It's the curse. Of course it's gonna be the curse, it's Beauty and the Beast, my boiz. No matter what he does there's always something that ends up getting his ass cursed by the enchantress. Misgender Colonel Mustard? Cursed! A pickle out of place on her patented Skinner Burgers™? Cursed! Expecting the beggar woman seeking shelter? Too Bad, Waluigi Time! Unreal.

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Blossom Detective Holmes Ad

Hold on, we dive in, there's a bite over here for a new idea: Blossom Detective Holmes. Check out the Kickstarter and see how you can provide for this great idea which already has an episode or two fully funded. Now, back to the video.

The Last thing I Ever Wanted to Report

With all the radicalizing of Mainstream Media Audiences against Donald Trump, Alex Jones and literally any boob willing to speak with a Russian, this chunk of Kingdom Hearts III news was the last bit I ever wanted to make. Now, we've all seen the D23 Trailer and all the big swings this has, i.e. Big Bots, Beyonetta Combat, nods to our old friend Mister Driller, all wrapped up in a world that sees our lovable franchise add new meaning to the word 'you got a friend in me.' take a look.

.trailer.

So yeah, Toy Story confirmed, 2018 release window, fanbase successfully hyped up, that's the good news. Bad News, we're getting less Disney Worlds than Kingdom Hearts II. With under ten worlds, this means we have five slots open for the remaining worlds which will be showcased as the final lap of our long wait approaches its destination.

So we're probably getting more uncreative town names from the Kingdom Hearts Mythology which, need I remind you, features body snatching crooks who seeks to recreate an ancient keyblade war that happened a long-ass time ago which featured the creator of the Keyblade attaching a gazing eye that has him write down the main timeline from far into the past for he and his six disciples to assume the worst and end up spiraling into the keyblade war they were trying to prevent out of fear of the Keyblade War that the probable traitor Xehanort will clearly cause in Kingdom Hearts. The cherry on top, Xehanort cracked time travel and it has so much restrictions that it can't change shit!

Kingdom Hearts and pretty much the entire modern Square Enix library is mediocre to disappointing to god fucking awful and it's pretty much Squeenix's own fault, and it started with FF13 and the changes to their practices around that time. The FF13 trilogy is their most disliked product they've put out, and that particular series itself is polarizing to many fans. There's also the fact that they've done some questionable censoring of games like the Bravely Default series, and using justifications that make no sense considering that that particular series would appeal mostly to fans of JRPGs, who are mostly comprised of people above the age of 18. Or making a change in Bravely Second to one job class because they didn't want to be offensive to a particular ethnic demographic, only for the change to be even more offensive to that exact demographic.

Not to mention that Squeenix had to buy out Eidos so they could maintain some profitability. This was smart, but they've squandered that acquisition with actions like dumping Hitman out of their hands because the stealth genre has been filled by other games. It's not because the model they forced it into failed, we're just putting it to use with their other franchises, like Kingdom Hearts 3. Insanity at its fuckest, folks!

Then there's Final Fantasy 15, which was made from the carcass of the failed spin-off Versus 13. Because of the mismanagement of resources and manpower to do a variety of different projects, they had to constantly rewrite the script, redo the engine, and it resulted in the game being stuck in development hell. It got to the point where they had to scrap the project and use the characters and certain elements for something else just to keep the copyrights on them, the ways in which it was responsible for holding back development in Kingdom Hearts 3 for so long for a finished product of FF15 that admittedly wasn't worth the wait clearly didn't help. If this had been in development for 5 years, that'd be fine. But the combat system and engine, which just feels like an open-world Kingdom Hearts-style game, took this long to finish AND it still felt clunky? No Squeenix, this is not acceptable. You wasted your time, and you wasted our time by putting this out when you could have just expanded upon the engines and systems established in KH: BBS and 3D and done something comparable in far less time. That's not to say there's nothing good in it, because there is. But that makes it all the more painful to say that this game could never even satisfy expectations.

And this brings me to FF7: Remake. It's nothing more than a cash grab because Squeenix is desperate. They know there's a vocal and cancerous minority of the FF fanbase that loves to ride Cloud's and Sephiroth's dicks, even though FF7 is narratively among the weakest of the entire series. They also know that many other fans will buy it because of nostalgia, so Squeenix is simply pushing this title out not because fans want it, but because they know they'll make a profit from it. And that's also factoring into why they'll put it out in episodic format, so they can make continual revenue from it. They also threw out the possibility of a FFX sequel, which I might like, but didn't ask for, and many others didn't ask for besides. So there's further evidence that they're capitalizing on nostalgia.

I've been a fan of Square since FF8, and have played a lot of their games: FF4, FF6, FF9-12 (not big on FF7, but I do enjoy its gameplay mechanics, which I feel are the game's sole strong suit), FF11 Online, DQ8 (love this game so much that I bought the 3DS revamp), Brave Fencer Musashi, the Kingdom Hearts series, and Bravely Default (haven't gotten around to playing Bravely Second, unfortunately). And from what I've seen of NieR: Automata, I want to get that game, but not because it's a Squeenix game; because Yoko Taro's vision and aesthetics, plus Platinum Games's excellence in making fun and challenging combat, appeals to me.

But all this doesn't change the fact that I feel burned by Squeenix, starting with the FF13 trilogy, and extending into the mismanagement that put highly anticipated games like KH3 and FF Versus 13 into development hell. Because of all the above, I've pretty much moved on from Squeenix, and don't consider myself a fan anymore. I am telling you, talent comes first, look for the creatives behind the game and see if you can trust them. I however do not trust Nomura since because of his failures as a talent and Squeenix's actions as a corporation, we've had the opportunity to see other solid JRPG titles rise in prominence, such as in the Tales of series, or the SoulsBorne series. And especially Persona. When Persona 4 came out after the joke that was FF13, it cemented the Persona series as the top of the JRPG ladder in western markets. And this has only been proven beyond a shadow of a doubt by Persona 5 getting such acclaim compared to FF15, as well as P5 breaking the series into Triple-A title territory. Final Fantasy is no longer the JRPG series king in the west, Persona holds that title now, and thankfully Atlus knows how to treat its base right. I hope this makes Squeenix shape up and restructure itself so it's practices are far less abusive to its base and so it puts out quality products again. But that's a big if. Either Squeenix clues in and plays ball with us, or it can sink its ship with their completion of Final Fantasy 7's cancer. I don't want Square Enix to collapse, It owns Soul Eater and Fullmetal Alchemist probably. But if they pull this episodic format with KHIII and this Final Fantasy 7 remake that is destined for failure, I kinda see Squeenix getting swallowed by a bigger company, my money's on Toei since how else are they gonna bolster their Shonen Jump roster.

Loops

Loop 1

Battles and Melees!

This is a tale of Battles of Melees, the aftermath of the following clashes will warm the cockles of your Darkness coated heart. Everyone loves Death Battle except when those folks find Bias in each of those.

---

"...Wow," Sonic muttered, looking at the results of that match. "Kind of wish we had you around when Mecha Sonic decided to attack the group back home."

"He hurt my son," Bowser replied. "And I cared less about the other world than I did him, but if he was that dangerous, then it's probably a good thing I finished him off before he did more damage."

Shadow was rather speechless during the whole thing as he looked at the remaining parts. "I'm going to need to borrow the seven Chaos Emeralds so I can incinerate the rest of his body," he said. "Don't want another one of him running around and destroying everything."

Bowser tossed him a Chaos Emerald in response to that. "You do that," he said, picking up Bowser Jr. "Right now, I'm going back to the castle. He needs to rest."

Sonic nodded. "We'll probably run into each other the moment you decide to kidnap the Princess again," he said. "Until then, take it easy."

Bowser gave out a chuckle before Shadow disappeared...then reappeared with the Emeralds, the parts nowhere to be found.

"You threw them into the sun?" Sonic asked Shadow.

"Only way to be sure," Shadow replied. "Now let's catch up with the others."

Sonic nodded as they sped away with the Emeralds in hand, glad that they ended a threat for one Loop.

---

Yeah, I just saw Bowser vs Mecha Sonic, and...well...I kind of see it as an unofficial end to the original SMBZ run. Heck, I picture Bowser reacting this way to anyone about to harm his son even without the One Minute Melee factor.

Regardless...it doesn't matter how much of a joke he was treated as. There's a reason why Bowser's a credible threat to the Mushroom Kingdom, and this battle solidified why.

Also, the next one is a bit of a reference to the two times Lucario and Renamon fought...although the second one...

---

(Pokemon)(Digimon)

Lucario was, as usual, visiting Sir Aaron's grave.

Appearance aside, Riley was one of the few that, when they met, reminded him of the man, appearance-wise, but didn't have the same amount of Aura Ash had.

Speaking of...

"When I said I'd be up for a rematch," he said, sensing a presence, "this is neither the time nor the place."

"Funny," a voice muttered, Renamon appearing on one of the broken pillars. "That's not what happened last time."

Lucario looked confused. "Last time?"

Renamon blinked. "Oh, right. You're a recent Awakening, so you might not remember how you offed me with a bone club."

Lucario flinched. "Suddenly, that tie we had is a lot more forgiving in hindsight." He then sighed. "Now I know how Fox felt when he had nightmares about his Death Battle against Bucky O'Hare." He then looked at her. "Only thing that would bring you here is if you and your friends are around, and Ash and the others are helping them get used to the situation...although I'm assuming that your current form is more of an unusual take on Illusion."

"You guessed correctly," Renamon said, changing from her usual yellow and purple appearance into a form that involves red hair and a black body. "I woke up as a Zoroark, but I still know my own techniques. It's just harder to get used to."

Lucario nodded. "And at this point, I've got a rather obvious advantage," he said. "But as a general rule, Type Charts are mere guidelines, and you've got years of experience over me. And like I said before, not here. There's a nearby Pokemon Stadium that...well, last I checked, Mewtwo and BlackWarGreymon tend to borrow for sparring practice."

Renamon nodded before disappearing. "I'll be waiting for that rematch," she muttered before fading from Lucario's aura sight.

The Jackal Pokemon just shook his head. "I'll be there," he said, walking out of there.

---

---

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Loop 2

What we are looking at today is a heartwarming tale of how the Infinite Loops bring folks together. For this loop, we dive balls first into a branch that's all about fighting spirit and the strength of the soul.

---

Simon knew it was going to be a weird loop when he Woke up, surfing the wave of pig-moles towards the ceiling over Jiha village.

It didn't really help that Nia, with single-coloured, light blue hair and pink eyes, was hugging the pig-mole for dear life right behind his leg. It meant there'd been a role shuffle. Of course, this one was already better than the time Viral and Kamina had swapped places. Viral insisting that Simon call him Aniki was just weird.

He didn't get any reply pings when he sent one out, either. That meant a solo run.

-0-0-0-

It was, at least, still Yoko to drop through the ceiling in pursuit of the Gunmen. He'd needed a shot Brain Bleach in Eden Hall after the loop where it was Kittan, and still in the same outfit.

wait, did that mean that he was supposed to romance Yoko this loop? Kamina would kill him!

So after escaping the Gunmen (he could've taken the Gunmen out with a blood drill, but he didn't want to break from the loop so soon.), Simon let Yoko take the shot that Kamina would have interrupted. Not that it mattered. Leeron hadn't upgraded her rifle yet.

So Nia lead them to the 'Face' that she'd uncovered. It was blue and white, and rather more rounded than Simon's normal Lagaan.

"Solvernia." Simon said. It did look an awful lot like the head of her Tengan Toppa Solvernia that she had in the movie variant, of course without the blue and yellow mane of Spiral Energy.

Simon only hoped that the Gurren equivalent wouldn't be too feminine.

-0-0-0-

Simon wasn't Kamina. No, he was Simon, not his aniki. That being said, he'd heard Kamina's speeches often enough that he still managed to convince Kittan of the Bachika siblings that they should go out and get their own Gunmen.

Viral, on the other hand, was a much more difficult fight. Simon was used to fighting with a drill. That meant thrusting strikes, and little lateral movement. Kamina had always been the one to fight with the ridiculously long sword, and he made it look good. Simon looked like he barely knew how to hold it. So much so, that he was glad that Nia broke up the fight when she did.

He did put up a better fight when it came to mech-to-mech combat though, back in his natural element. Enough to hold his own, but not so well that people got suspicious.

He still stole Enki's helm.

-0-0-0-

Adiane had swapped with Thymilph this loop. Oh, she still had Sayrune, her personal mech, but she commanded the Dai-Gunzan, rather than the Dai-Gunkai.

Yoko didn't give him the Kiss of Death, luckily. Even if the upcoming fight didn't kill him, Kamina would.

Even so, Simon barely avoided getting skewered by Sayrune's tail. It also didn't change the fact that he 'created' the Giga Drill Breaker to deal with her. It also meant that Rossiu wouldn't get to drive. But Simon didn't mind.

-0-0-0-

Without the Solvernia vomiting, (and Simon still didn't know what that vomit actually was), he had to engineer an excuse to jump down the ravine. So when the horse-headed Gunmen showed up, he jumped on it with both feet. Literally.

He kicked the Gunmen into the canyon.

It was what Kamina would do.

-0-0-0-

When Nia unlocked the Drill-lock, the chest opened to reveal Kamina. With Blue-and-Yellow hair, and bright cyan eyes with a red gothic cross in the middle.

He was, as always, shirtless, but, this time, had a blue cape, rather than his normal red, and a thin layer of light blue chest hair in the shape of a spiral. He also had a blue set of his normal triangle shades. He was also the same age as Simon, rather than Nia.

He sat up, stretched, and said. "Hail fellows, well met."

"Hail fellows?" Nia asked. Simon was dumbfounded. That was so, so... UnKamina.

"And who are you, good lady?" He asked.

"Ano... I don't think I'm anyone important enough to be called 'good lady'."

Kamina looked around. "Oh, this is the outside I've heard so much about. And this is... Rain?" He got up and out of the box. "And this is... mud? It's cold and damp and squishy."

"Are you alright without shoes?" Nia asked.

"I'm fine." He replied. He got right up in Nia's face. "Why do you look like me? No tail, no fangs, or fur, nor claw or scale?"

Nia laughed. Her voice tinkled in the air. "I'm a human silly, that's normal."

"A human? And what, exactly, is a human?"

As Nia tried explain humanity to Kamina, Simon wondered at the differences this would make to the timeline. Anti-Spiral Kamina? That was an odd thought.

The Dai-Gurren crew rolled out the welcoming feast that was supposed to pass for an interrogation. The combination of Kamina's natural charisma, ham tendencies, and what seemed to be genuine ignorance, had them eating out of his hand.

-0-0-0-

But before long, Thymilph brought the Dai-Gunkai to the Dai-Gurren, and landed the Byakou right on their deck.

Kamina rushed out on deck and stopped not ten feet away.

"Stand down Thymilph! First Prince Kamina, son of the Spiral King Lord Genome, orders you!" Arms spread wide, he glared at the Gunmen. "I will not permit you to do violence upon these people!"

Thymilph took a moment to talk to his beastmen on the Dai-Gunkai.

Then he began laughing. "Aha, aha, ahahahahahaa... Oh, Prince Kamina, haven't you heard? Your Father threw you away. Like a Piece. Of. Trash. You can die with the rest of the trash on board."

It was only the fact that Simon was ready for a possible movie variant, where Cytomander and Guame could show up any minute, that let him intercept Byakou's spear in time. Like hell was he letting Kamina die so easily.

-0-0-0-

As it happened, this wasn't a movie variant, meaning that Cytomander and Guame were handled over the next month, rather than all at once.

The Beach Day had the otherwise 'sheltered' Kamina in a Speedo. It reminded Simon of the Bathhouse incident honestly. Yoko and Leeron had stars in their eyes. Thankfully, though, Nia was indifferent.

The major change here was that they'd already dealt with Thymilph, so they didn't get ambushed in the water.

Simon never got bored of seeing the Dai-Gurren kick the Dai-Gunten, and it did let them grab the Levia-sphere too.

But the biggest change of the loop so far came after Kamina insisted on speaking to Lord Genome personally, when they reached Teppelin.

-0-0-0-

As Simon and Nia confronted Viral in the Enkidudu (Not to be confused with the original Enki or the Enkidu - this was the four armed version), Kamina stepped out to face Lord Genome personally.

Not that Viral lasted long. No beastman, immortal or otherwise, would ever be able to match a human that had unlocked their Spiral power.

"Kamina."

"It has been a long time, Father."

"You're looking quite well. You do know I never expected to see you again."

Kamina stalked towards Lord Genome's throne. "I'd just like to know, why do you drive the humans underground, and exterminate them when they reach the surface. It seems like a cruel and heartless act, so unlike the man I know."

"Ignorance is such a frightening thing. You truly believe you fight on the side of righteousness, but I am the one protecting this world. It is I, Lord Genome, who am the ultimate guardian of humanity."

"By killing your charges?"

"This path is the only one that ensures Humanities survival. Your friends have strayed from the path, and for the whole of Humanities sake, cannot be allowed to live."

A thin, whip-like drill lashed out, only for Simon to block it.

"The Spiral Power is strong within them. But such power will lead to destruction. Allow me to teach you." His throne sunk down, and into the floor. "As you know, they are not the only ones to possess Spiral Power."

The Lazengann rose to the floor's level. Kamina dashed to the wall, blue Spiral Energy wreathing his legs, as Lord Genome's personal Gunmen leapt high.

-0-0-0-

The Gurren-Solvernia and the Lazengann were evenly matched. Punch for Punch, Drill for Drill. Despite the fact that both Simon and Nia were channelling Spiral Energy into their mech, Lord Genome seemed more powerful than normal too.

In the end, their arms broke, and their drills shattered.

Lord Genome tore the way out of his own cockpit, "I shouldn't have trusted a Gunmen to get the job done!" His head blazing with his signature red Spiral Energy, he strode towards the crippled Gurren Solvernia.

Only for Kamina to stand in his way.

"Kamina."

"Father."

They threw simultaneous punches, each hitting the other in the face, sending both backwards. They got up and resumed the fistfight, bodyblows and jabs making meaty thuds, uppercuts rocking jaws. Blue Spiral Energy met Red as fist met fist.

They locked hands, pitting their strength against one another. "We can protect humanity together."

Lord Genome knocked Kamina back. "I've haven't this much fun in months."

"I knew I was your favourite son."

"Show me your Spiral Power son, make me proud!"

With a straight lunge, Kamina's fist connected dead center with the spiralling hair on Lord Genome's chest. Blue Spiral Energy burst from his back, and he was sent tumbling backwards, until he slammed into the wall.

"I see. Your Spiral Power has grown to match my own." He chuckled. "Maybe you're right, my son. Perhaps we should try it your way."

-0-0-0-

Simon reflected on just how weird it was. Lord Genome had survived the battle of Teppelin. He stepped down as ruler, though, and was content to serve as an advisor to the new Teppelin council.

And so he passed on the message of the Anti-Spiral's ultimatum personally. And for the next seven years, between Simon's out-of-loop knowledge, and Lord Genome's own knowledge of the world before the Beastmen, they managed an even greater level of technology than normal.

With the repaired Lazengann, they had two flight-capable Gunmen specifically designed to counter the Mugann, and, between Lord Genome and Simon, two pilots that knew all about the Mugann's explosive tendencies.

Rossiu, whom still had a place on the council of course, had no reason to arrest Simon and Nia, nor Lord Genome.

Kamina didn't turn out to be the Anti-Spiral Messenger, thankfully. It actually turned out to be one of Lord Genome's daughters, Kamina's sister for the loop. Simon had known that Lord Genome kept a harem, but he'd never actually followed up on that train of thought...

Lord Genome, on the other hand, was pissed. The Anti-Spirals dared take one of his children? Kamina was spitting nails too.

When the Catherdral Terra activated, they still launched the Arc-Gurren.

Then Lord Genome revealed the secret of Teppelin Tower. It was actually the Dai-Gun Dekabutsu!

-0-0-0-

The rest of the loop played out pretty much baseline, with Nia in the lead role. The Arc-Gurren Solvernia taking over the Cathedral Terra to form the Choginga Dai-Gurren, though Lord Genome could have used Dekabutsu to the same effect, the Galactic Spiral Abyss, which Simon preferred to call the Sea of Despair, full of dead and drained Lagaan-type mecha, and Kittan's ultimate sacrifice, before finally the multi-dimensional labyrinth.

Using the necklace worn by Lord Genome's daughter, Team Dai-Gurren made their way to the Anti-Spiral space, and each member, using the Lagaan-types from the Sea of Despair, combined with the Choginga Dai-Gurren Solvernia to form the Tengan Toppa Gurren Solvernia.

Nia started. "Even when trapped by karma's cycle.."

Next was Yoko. "The dreams we left behind will open the door!"

Leeron got in on the action: "Even if the universe stands in our way..."

Lord Genome wasn't left out: "Souls once drowned in a sea of despair, reawaken!"

Then Viral: "Our burning blood will determine what will be!"

Kamina was never going to be silent: "Using our power to cut through Fate!"

Simon: "We'll break through time and space!"

They all came together: "And defy all who would stop us to grab hold of our path!"

And then back to Nia: "Tengen Toppa Gurren Solvernia!"

"JUST WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK WE ARE?!"

-0-0-0-

The Anti-Spiral mech combined two galaxies to form their ultimate attack.

"Infinity Big Bang Stoorrmm!" It brought the beam to bear. "Burn in the everlasting hellfire of creation!"

"Not yet, we're not done!" Nia cried.

"Nia!" Lord Genome yelled. "Leave this one to me." The Lazengann tore it's way out of the Tengan Toppa Gurren Solvernia, and caught the beam.

"Father!" Kamina yelled.

"Do not grieve for me, my son. I waited a thousand years for my revenge. If my sacrifice can create a tomorrow for all Spiral Life then I will gladly give it."

"Your Sacrifice will be for nothing!" The Anti Spirals yelled, as they intensified the beam.

"That's what I was waiting for!" Lord Genome countered, as he turned his essence, his very being into Spiral Energy, absorbing and redirecting the Anti-Spiral attack with it. "Nia, take it!"

"He allowed himself to undergo quantum breakdown to become one with the energy?!"

"Eat this!" Nia screamed, as she brought a fresh drill to bear.

"Never!"

It was drill to drill combat, until, finally, the Granzeboma brought out extra drill directly from the homeworld on the crest of it's head, catching the Tengan Toppa Gurren Solvernia. In reply, it released the Choginga Dai-Gurren Solvernia, then the Arc-Gurren Solvernia, then the Gurren Solvernia in turn.

As the drills looked set to pierce the Gurren Solvernia too, the Dekabutsu Lazengann, piloted by Kamina, smashed through them from beneath the Gurren Solvernia.

"My father was a shining example of the potential of humanity, how can I do any less?!"

"Solvernia. Impact!"

-0-0-0-

As the crowds died down, Kamina, still in his blue cape and triangle glasses, turned to Simon, and winked before walking into the sunset. After feeling a ping, the loop immediately ended.

-0-0-0-

"Kamina?"

---

Beautiful, it's unsure who sent the ping, that's the special power to detect fellow loopers that might be awake in a particular branch, many theorize that it was Kamina himself who sent it, indicating that he was Awake for a while be it that he Awoke during either the Anti-Spiral Wars, the timeskip leading up to it, or even when Nia opened up the capsule. Either way, it is so freaking satisfying to see these bozos get their happy ending for once, but in another way, that just speaks to how well that world was archived.

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Loop 3

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0

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Loop 4

.

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0

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Loop 5

We found Proof! Of how the worst Nicktoon ever can produce the nicest Loopers. Longtime fans of the classic Fandom Arson program will remember my vendetta with the Fairly OddParents and how this show does everything wrong in terms of being a Nicktoon, If we're being honest, it's the Sword Art Online of Nickelodeon. But that did not stop -admin- from getting that branch to Loop. Take a look.

---

"I wish I had a better lunch," Timmy declared. Wanda and Cosmo, his wish granting fairy odd parents, waved their magic wands and made that small, sucky part of his life all the better. School necessitated these sorts of wishes.

Timmy saved his "cause adventure for the day" wishes for after school... usually. Assuming his bully Francis or his crazy teacher Mr. Crocker didn't make things worse than normal. Or his evil babysitter Vicky didn't show up.

Usually this meant boredly eating lentil salad with bleu cheese, a hard bread crumble and rosemary vinaigrette. Timmy stared at his staring best friends, Chester and AJ. "What? Ten year old can't have good taste?"

"...Where did you get that?" AJ asked.

"Internet."

"...Okay," AJ, his genius best friend, said. Timmy smiled at the fact that despite millions of years, that excuse still worked. It was like the Fire Players, or whatever Sokka called that troupe.

Further discussion was halted when Trixie Tang walked by. Of course, ten year old puppy love kicked in while she was moving, and vanished when she was gone. "So, how's the salad?" Chester asked.

"Eh. It's alright." Timmy kept eating his salad. "I wish it had some more sauce."

There was more sauce to be had.

"Now, I aye aye." AJ tried and failed. Timmy turned and his jaw dropped.

There was... Trixie. Trixie Tang. Who had swapped out her skirt and blouse for a sweater and jeans. Baseball cap, sneakers, even a comic book under her arm. "Hey, is this spot taken?"

"..." The trio of stunned boys nodded.

"Thank you," Trixie said. She sat down and opened her Crimson Chin comic book... Unside down. "I'm not sure I'm doing this right?"

Well, that broke the shock. AJ talked her into turning out over, and before long the argument of who had the best chance against the Chin (between the Bronze Kneecap and the Iron Lung) was on. By the time lunch was over, the group glare the popular kids were sending them and the small crowd that had gathered cemented Trixie's position as just one of the kids.

It was only after lunch that Timmy's significance sense went off. He shrugged it off. It was probably nothing.

---

Oh, yeah. That plot thread of Trixie Tang being a closet geek, front and center with the Loops. For those wondering if Timmy is clued into this twist, don't you worry bout a thing, friends. We've got Sequel!

---

Timmy enjoyed these kinds of loops. The loops where nothing bad happened, and a few well-worded wishes made his life a bit better.

"You know guys? This is nice." The Anchor told his fairies. "No Anti-Fairies, no Pixies, The Darkness was defeated, Vicky is still in Yugopotamia..."

"Not to mention you and Tootie are doing great as a couple!" Wanda declared, as she fed Poof.

"Yeah, what can I say, she's my wife a lot of the time."

"But sometimes Trixie is too, and yet you keep going to her."

"Well, Trixie is fine, pretty and all, but I've been Tootie's husband a lot of times, including those Variants where I grow up."

Poof stopped drinking his milk. "Oh yeah, I had forgotten about those. Weird, huh?" He said.

"How can you forget the Variant where you learnt to talk?" Wanda asked.

"I dunno, ask dad how he forgets things." The baby answered, and Wanda had to accept, he had a point.

Just in that moment, a little green superhero-styled car appeared and impacted with Timmy, making him fly to his bed. From the car, Cosmo, or rather Super Not-Cosmo, appeared. "Super Not-Cosmo reporting to Timmy's room!"

"Alright, next time I'll wish for an anti-car crash shield." Timmy muttered. "Now then, what's the status?"

"Everything normal! Crocker's still insane, Tootie's getting ready for your date, Trixie's helping her without Tootie blackmailing her, there's a taco sale down the street..."

"Wait, what?" Timmy did a double-take at what Cosmo had said.

"Oh yeah! There's a taco sale! I'd come sooner, but they did effect almost instantly and-"

"Not that! The part with Trixie and Tootie!" The magic godchild said. "Wanda, I wish for my Dimsdale Big Brother TV."

"You know, you could just put it into your Pocket."

"And risk myself to seeing you explode for lack of wishes? No thanks!" Timmy said, as, Rising her wand, Wanda made appear a golden plasma TV with a long remote control in a poof.

"Let's see, Trixie, Trixie... Ah, there it is!" Timmy declared, pressing a button with Trixie's face on it. The screen lit up, and an image of Trixie helping Tootie with her clothes and in the outfit she used to buy comics appeared.

"Huh, and I thought it was gonna be Baseline." Poof said.

"Silence, they're talking!" Cosmo said, while eating popcorn and eating soda, watching the screen.

"And so, Crimson Chin saved Crash Nebula from the combined forces of Negachin and Nega Nebula!"

"Wow! That was awesome! I have to see Crash Nebula when I have the time." Tootie said, as Trixie fixed her hair.

"Yeah, I enjoy that crossover a lot, I had three copies of it, the comic version, the movie and the novel. I just told you the movie ending." Trixie said, which set some alarms off in Timmy's head.

"Awesome! Can I borrow it?" Tootie asked, not noticing the rich girl wincing at that.

"Sorry, but I lost the movie on the internet." Trixie said. "But I have the comic, if you want it."

"I guess that's fine too..." Tootie said.

"Good, now stay still, these pigtails won't appear magically." Trixie said, and the two girls stopped talking until Timmy shut the TV down.

"Do you think..." Wanda asked, realizing what Timmy had in mind.

"Even I realized that!" Cosmo said, as Poof nodded.

"The TV special was only made a few loops ago, and not this one..." Timmy said to himself. That meant...

"Trixie's looping?" Timmy asked. "Now that I think about it, she has been acting strange in more loops than usual... We need to talk to her."

"But Timmy, your date!"

"Oh, don't worry, I have a plan..."

--

"Thanks for the makeover! I'm sure my Dreamy Timmy will like it!"

"Yeah, I'm sure he will. Good luck!" Trixie declared, as she left Tootie's home. It was nice to help the little girl with her love.

'Maybe next time I'll try the same.' She thought, as she arrived to her home.

However, to her surprise, Timmy was there, as if waiting for her.

"Timmy? What are you doing here? Your date is-"

"Don't worry, I'm there right now." Timmy answered. "I'm a Shadow Clone, and I need to talk with you."

"A Shadow what? Where did you learn to do that?" Trixie asked, not fully believing what Timmy was saying, and yet keeping an open mind.

Timmy grinned when she asked that. "Internet."

"Uh, no, it can't be. How do you learn to clone yourself with the internet?" Trixie asked, confused. Confusion that grew bigger when Timmy started laughing. "And what was so funny?"

"Sorry, sorry..." Timmy said between laughs. "Is just that I haven't heard anyone from this world question that in decades!"

"Decades?! What are you talking about?!"

"I'll explain everything, but before that I want to ask you a question. Are you repeating time?"

"I... How did you know that?!" Trixie shouted, really dtartled for how did Timmy know that.

"Well, let me tell you a story about a multiversal magic tree..."

---

Beautiful. Trixie would go on to have plenty of adventures in the Infinite Loops, even one where she obtains the powers of the Shapeshifting Master of Darkness himself Aku. But then there's the new Looper's Addendum, it is okay to share your secret about fairies with fellow Loopers on the account that they're four-dimensional extensions to the person's memories. Personally, with this newfound freedom to spread the word at least a tiny bit, I say good riddance to that secret. Social Media's invasion of privacy has made suspension of disbelief much harder when secret identities are involved. No mask, no secret, all thanks to face recognition software and those domino masks sadly don't count for shit anymore. Secret Heroes have to go full cowl.

You really feeling it? Comment below, let me know. Subscribe for more videos coming down the pipe. Follow me on Social Media if you feel so inclined and if you want Fandom Arson to continue its Evolution then do please, support us on Patreon and share this video on your social networks. DeeP DiSH for Fandom Arson Embers, Yggdrasil.

Loop 6

The Clown who got the supreme chancellor's chair reacted in a unique way than anyone expected. Now for those new to the Loops, the title of Supreme Chancellor is subject to a democratic vote and there is always that one Loop where they elect someone completely out of Left Field, you know, like America.

---

N just gave them a frown.

"Of all the people to choose as Chancellor," he muttered, "why me?"

"Don't look at me," Anakin replied. "You're probably a safer choice than the rest of the nutjobs."

Ash, Pikachu, and N looked at each other, but really...he had a point. Giovanni would have to give up a lot of power in order to become Chancellor, Maxie and Archie's ideas would probably screw with planetary orbit, Cyrus would have become God of a galaxy without emotions, Ghestis...dropped out once N was put in power and offered to become his cabinet (Ash and Pikachu had to fight in order to prevent that from happening), Lysandre would have probably gone the Palpatine Route, and they weren't exactly sure what Lusamine would do, but when they saw some kind of jellyfish thing hovering over her head, it probably involved that.

Then they stared at the man who actually became N's adviser, a man with asymmetrical sunglasses and a jacket with an S on it.

"Don't look at me," he said. "I voted for Zinnia."

Anakin had no idea where this guy came from, but he had a feeling that this guy didn't run for a reason.

---

..

Loop 7

Unreal, The way this big attempt at fixing Yggdrasil backfired will make you Yak. Kamina and Simon are men of fighting spirit and this clearly translates into reckless abandon within their actions, everything they do is radically over the top and it is redonkulously easy for these fools and just about any boob they bestow the secrets of spiral power upon to crash their Loop.

---

Memories flooded the two Loopers almost mid-stride. It was like vertigo for a moment, you didn't know which end was up and it always sucked. "Bro," Simon began, "remind me why we tried combining Spiral Teleportation with the Anti-Spiral Big Bang Storm again?"

Kamina placed his arm around his younger brother and held the other up to the roof of the bunker they were now in, "Isn't it obvious, Simon?! We're men, and we'll do anything we can to destroy the ceilings placed over us. It's our duty since the formation of team Dai-Gurren to break free from all chains that hold us down! Using their own weapon and our teleportation, we would move our entire universe back into the normal time flow."

Simon deadpanned, "Instead, we somehow managed to destroy all of time and space."

Kamina would not let his spirits be dampened, "Don't give me that, Simon! No matter how many Eiken Loops we have to go through, we'll someday find a way to escape the Loops. Now, let's go find my woman!"

Little did they know that the goddesses running Yggdrasil had set up special contingencies just for the Gurren Lagann Loops to prevent catastrophic system failure based on their destructive actions alone.

Kamina and Simon turned to exit the bunker when an air raid siren sounded. Countless people rushed past them in fear while the two Loopers took no note of them. Kamina bellowed, "Who's causing that noise! The great Kamina demands that it cease at once!"

The older of the two picked up the pace, drawing his prized katana from his pocket hammerspace dimension, intent on beating the hell out of the moron sounding that alarm. Over the wail, the crackling of flak guns couldn't be heard. Simon seemed a bit more nervous, "Uh, bro, I don't think this is another Eiken Loop."

Kamina paused his pursuit of the siren and looked himself over, noting a torn military uniform, "Hmm...true. Seems we might be in some sort of military."

He looked over to Simon and gave a shit-eating grin, "Think we're in another Command and Conquer Loop? Playing as Empire of the Rising Sun was a blast."

A minute later, the two were out of the bunker. Their first sight when exiting was a multicolored barrier a little under four miles away with a sea spanning the distance between them. However, what they could tell was that it was enormous. It made them forget about the siren they had come up to stop.

Around them, countless anti-air batteries continued to fire away on an unknown foe overhead, making the two of them look to the sky. If the barrier gave them pause, countless pegasi descending like dive bombers caused their brains to shut down for a moment. It was in that moment that their Loop Memories returned.

Simon pinched his nose as a headache started forming, "Well, damn."

It was moments later that glass jars filled with colorful purple liquid dropped like rain.

Yes, the goddesses of Yggdrasil had set contingencies for the abnormally destructive nature that was the Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann Loop. Entire galaxies in the prime universe were used as weapons after all. Those contingencies meant sending them into a Fused Loop in order to give time to reboot their universe. Unfortunately, those contingencies just couldn't handle the stress of all of time and space collapsing.

---

Oh, Loops can't handle extreme power and thus are suspectable to crashing even the Fused Loops that follow. Wow, Science! Simon the Digger alone is a fireball of pure badassitude, but put him with Kamina, Awake or no, and you're practically begging for sheer unpredictability at every turn and plenty of us here enjoy every moment of it!

You really feeling it? Comment below, let me know. Subscribe for more videos coming down the pipe. Follow me on Social Media if you feel so inclined and if you want Fandom Arson to continue its Evolution then do please, support us on Patreon and share this video on your social networks. DeeP DiSH for Fandom Arson Embers, Yggdrasil.

Loop 8

To cinnabrate Undertale's first clumsy's steps onto home consoles, We've got a snip honoring an often forgotten gem of gaming.

---

0

---

.

Loop 9

.

---

0

---

.

Loop 10

This is a very hype situation, this unique method of Activation is the thing that miracles are made of! We get a brief peek at Undertale and it's been looping for about two million years now, it's Anchor Frisk really fracking wants their friend Asriel to live, and with their Loop beginning long after his tragic death, it seemed incredibly unlikely until Flowey started Looping. Take a Look.

---

Jizo had taken a few moments to relax at his work station. The loop was set to complete in a moment's time. Chara a bit more active this loop, acting more as an evil voice in the back of Frisk's head. He almost cracked up when, at Grillby's, Chara had demanded the souls of the innocents for sustenance. Frisk replied a second later to Grillby's request for two bagels, one presumably for her evil advisor, who screamed in outrage. As he prepared to activate the continuation into the next loop, a sudden pop up appeared.

LOOPER CANDIDATE DESIGNATED 'FLOWEY' APPLICABLE FOR LOOPING STATUS

ACTIVATE? Y/N

Jizo's hand instinctively went for the NO button. It was far too soon. I need to reconstitute Asriel's soul before I can activate it, he thought to himself as he hovered over the NO button. But then he paused and thought about it for a second. His eyes landed on a video he had recorded of Frisk wandering around SnowedIn with Flowey, the flower grumbling in frustration the whole time. Then of Frisk and Flowey interacting after leaving the underground, Frisk showing off Flowey to his classmates. Even now the loop was set to close with Frisk hanging out with Flowey as the Sun set in the distance.

(Undertale POV)

Flowey leaned in front of Frisk, who just lifted the potted plant up and planted it on her head. Flowey frowned, "Your neck is gonna get really tired-"

He blinked in what he thought was realization. "Oh! You're gonna make me fall, aren't you?"

Frisk smirked and said cheerfully, "Nope!"

Flowey frowned, then looked up at the sun rising in the distance. His eyes widened slightly. He barely resisted smiling at the sight. He muttered, "I still have a better view than you."

Frisk just chuckled.

(Admin POV)

Jizo didn't push the button. He minimized the pop up and started forming a plan in his head. With a couple commands, he added another couple hours to this loop's run time. Though he couldn't add a whole day and he would be writing up quite a lot of paperwork for the extension and drain on Yggdrasil's resources, he knew this was the right course of action. Afterwords, he activated one of his avatars and slipped into the Undertale Universe.

(Undertale POV)

With the sun below the mountains, Frisk sighed and stood up, pulling Flowey off her head and carrying her back home. It wasn't too far a trip. He set Flowey down on the table, when her cell started ringing. She opened up the phone and answered. The voice on the other end was one she hadn't heard in awhile, and needed a moment to recall. "Frisk, this is Jizo."

She snapped her fingers after a minute, remembering it was her admin, "Mr. Jizo! I haven't spoken to you in awhile! Tell me, do you like butterscotch and Cinnamon Pie?"

Jizo paused, then replied, "That would sound nice, but now is not the time for that. Can we talk? I have an important question to ask. I will send the River Person to meet you."

Frisk hung up and stepped out, telling Toriel and Flowey she would be back later. A short time later the River Person, carrying Frisk, arrived at Waterfall and deposited the young girl. She made her way quickly to the statue, which still had the umbrella up from earlier this loop. The statue seemed to smile even as the music box played in the background. "Good to see you again, determined one."

Frisk dug in her pocket and pulled out a whole Butterscotch and Cinnamon Pie. The admin was touched by the gesture. Frisk set the pie down in front of him. A moment later, though the statue could not actually move, the pie faded away. She asked, "What did you want to talk about?"

The statue seemed to shift, appearing serious, "Frisk, if Flowey started looping, do you think you could teach him right from wrong, guiding him?"

Frisk blinked in shock as Jizo continued, "I was prompted with a decision before this loop ends, to activate Flowey as a looper. Then I saw how you interacted with him in the loops, so-"

"How can Flowey loop? I thought loopers had to have a soul. Something about containing the essence of a person or something."

"How can Flowey loop? I thought loopers had to have a soul."

Jizo seemed to all of a sudden be contemplative, "Tell me, do robots and computers have souls?"

Frisk paused in her answer, "Mettaton does, and so does Tsunderplane. But just computers...no...not a monster soul anyway."

Jizo seemed to smile again, "In some universes, computers have artificial intelligence. One in particular, Data, is looping though he has no monster soul. See, the soul is more than just a container. It's your essence, the very thing that makes you who you are. Your loves, your hates, your joy and sorrow, ability to feel. Even Flowey has a soul in a manner of speaking. He can feel things: fear, anger, annoyance, other emotions."

Frisk pondered this a second, then gasped, "But if Flowey Loops, wouldn't that mean Asriel never will?"

Jizo chuckled, "I'm going to use Flowey as a sort of anchor...not the same as you, mind you, but an anchor to gather and hold Asriel's essence so I can rebuild his soul from the ground up. The more he loops, the more Asriel will recover, like being on life support and the body slowly mending itself. Once he is fully reassembled, Asriel can start looping when prompted."

Frisk blinked and felt excitement well up. Quickly though, that excitement dissipated after remembering the fun she had with the flower, "But I don't want Flowey to disappear either."

Jizo seemed proud, "You are kind beyond measure. I assure you though, Asriel and Flowey will awaken as two different people."

"I...don't understand."

Jizo answered by explaining another looper's condition. A pony named Luna. She had a darker side, known as Nightmare Moon. In a certain variant, the Anchor, Twilight Sparkle, adopted the essence of Nightmare Moon who had been reborn as a child through an ancient ritual. Her name was Nyx, and Twilight thought her lost forever when the loop ended. But the admin in charge of the branch was cunning, and used a loophole to get Nightmare Moon looping, in the form of Nyx. Nyx would separate from Luna's body and form a body of her own.

"That's what I'm going to do here. But in order to do this, I need you to teach Flowey right and wrong, to keep him from destabilizing and trying to ascend. Teach him how to be kind, and how to adapt to his new life. Do you think you can do this."

Frisk pulled out two notebooks from her pocket. One had pictures of Asriel and the other her adventures with Flowey. Both were still small comparatively, but they filled her to the brim with determination. She nodded, and Jizo seemed to grin.

A moment later, Jizo reappeared at his terminal. A Butterscotch and Cinnamon pie sat on his desk a few feet away. His finger tapped the screen, authorizing Flowey's activation.

(Undertale POV)

It happened almost instantly. Flowey blinked, watching the full moon through a window from the counter top, only to open his eyes and be present in the underground again. Frisk stood before him, a ball in hand. Flowey looked around, asking, "What...how...you...we're...you reset?!"

Frisk grinned, which set Flowey off. "YOU IDIOT! You had everything you ever wanted, and you reset everything?! What were you thinking you miserable crybaby?!"

Frisk fell on her bottom and dropped the ball. "I didn't do this. It happens eventually."

She pushed the ball forward towards Flowey, who angrily pushed it back, "You're the only one with enough DETERMINATION to reset the timeline!"

Frisk pushed the ball back to Flowey, "The multiverse is broken. Time is repeating itself over and over again for a lot of universes. You'll probably meet some of them since you're now aware of those too."

Flowey growled as he sent the ball back, "You expect me to believe that nonsense!"

Frisk shrugged as she pushed the ball back, "Well, you are a talking flower while really being the reanimated remains of a dead prince. You are also talking to a human that can, at will, reset timelines in this universe. Why wouldn't you believe there is a multiverse and that it's broken?"

Flowey opened his mouth to retort, then paused and developed a very put off look. He looked down and muttered, "touche."

Frisk smiled. "Did mom ever tell you the tale of the great tree, Yggdrasil?"

With that, Frisk began her Welcome to the Multiverse Speech.

---

Gotta admit, using the soulless husk your dust has maticulously animated as a magnet for the soul inhabiting the dust from whence it was housed, that's a pretty smart idea unlike the thought of pocketing someone you want Looping to activate them. I mean, damn, who'd be dumb enough to do that... For those wondering if it worked, don't cause we got Sequel!

---

.snip.

---

A Touching moment, what else can be said except... how touching.

You really feeling it? Comment below, let me know. Subscribe for more videos coming down the pipe. Follow me on Social Media if you feel so inclined and if you want Fandom Arson to continue its Evolution then do please, support us on Patreon and share this video on your social networks. DeeP DiSH for Fandom Arson Embers, Yggdrasil.

Loop 11

Yes! First. Contact. If this doesn't make you abso-fracking-lutely tired of winning, I dunno what will! Yes, it's no secret that humanity has tried time and again to become a spacefaring species for decades on end and all we've managed to was lose the technology to fly us to the moon. The Obama Administration forcing NASA to focus squarely on the Climate Change Eugenics Scam was a major thorn in our side, but we have refocused our efforts to set sail to the stars! Until today when an array of alien freighters parked on earth to declare that we are the descendants of the Eden System of transgalactic terraforming and promptly ask about the engineers stationed on Atlantis before promptly learning what had happened over the past 25 trillion years since they created this planet. Yes, Creationism is real and so's evolution. Not as you know it, mind you, but a sort of scale for evolutionary power. And we humans are at the tip of the proverbial food chain, single celled organisms at the bottom, these Lespiran administrators at the top can channel the electromagnetic waves to trigger a process called evolutionary metamorphosis which causes Animals to spontaneously grow into a more humanlike level on the chain. Great, so some disease-riddled chimp is gonna grow into a human disease-riddled chimp, right. Eheheh, Wrong. Faunus are basically Humans with animalistic traits, and the ultimate form of animalkind, nothing higher, not even the state of humanity. But the big thing is the Yggdrasil Olympics, Designed as an event of peace across all of their colonies to celebrate the awakening of cosmic travel across the board! So for Fandom Arson Embers, we bid thanks to Lady Celestia deLanza and Madame Diana L. deLanza from the planet Equalia for lighting our path to the stars.

Loop 12

Loop 13

How I'd probably book

Red Ribbon Arms Race

Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, it's no secret that Akira Toriyama started making shit up after the Freeza Arc. But what would the Android Saga look like if it were planned out in advance, that's a rather interesting concept to ponder. So I'm going to channel my inner MasakoX here and piece together how a tactiful Toriyama would cook up the Android Saga.

We open right at the end of the Freeza Arc, Freeza considers blasting Goku but considers the possibility he might get fried himself and spares the Saiyan Monkey on the grounds that he'll work to surpass him, the same way Goku spares Freeza on the grounds that he'll do better. The fact that he considers doing the thing he did back in the original version means he has a lot of growing to do, please consult the fanfiction 'The Fall of Lord Freeza' for details beyond what I'm going into here but regardless: Freeza's family is sent in, older brother Cooler and Father Karuato Cold bringing their troops which the Z-Fighters effectively display their training with King Kai on the Cooler Armored Squadron while Trunks squares off against Cooler and Karuato, Latter Cold breaks out his Third Form while the former Cold holds his own in his apparent final form. But when backed into a corner, Cooler boasts a fifth form in addition to his fully-unsealed fourth form. The King raises an eyebrow at this until he sees it for himself.

-Android 19-

-Android 21-

-Androids 22 and 23-

-Androids 13 to 18-

-Android 24-

-Androids 25 and 26-

-Android 27: Cell-

Marvel's Gargoyles

Disney presents: Marvel's Beauty and the Beast

Marvel's Kingdom Hearts

Yoshi Muyo

A lot of buzz has been humming about with Tenchi Muyo and the original creator -name- what with his continued devotion to the series to the point where he illustrated the final end is Tenchi marrying every one of the girls who find themselves living in his house. Now, -power-. Fans have always wondered what family life would be like for Tenchi, -name- has apparently always been wondering about that, too, because now we have an array of concepts in Tenchi Muyo if. Although it's just a mere series of timelines going from birth to marriage, that just gives us room to build a whole four season series out of it so let's get it on!

First up, we gotta name the offspring of the hour, Tenchi's daughters are dubbed Aoko and Yukane, Seina's boy is Senshi, and our main protag is going to be called Yoshi!

We open on Yoshinaru or Yoshi since we need to keep the four syllable title in.

Unlucky Knuckles

DeeP DiSH: Sweet Crap on Toast, I could be slowed down by a bonbardment of bombs during the Time Eater Boss on the PC Port of Sonic Generations and I could still call it a more doable task than this! Worst part of the game, by far! You know what, Sonic Heroes, You made me feel like Wailing on Sonic again, so you're going to sit right there while I tear apart another serving of Boom!

-INTRO-

DeeP DiSH: There will never be another good Sonic Game, at least not one that is developed by the current Sonic Team. Writer Robbie realized this at the Frog Forest Zone of Sonic Heroes, I have accepted this the minute I saw 'Shadow the Hedgehog', a good chunk of the fandom saw this unintentional admission at every loading screen of '06. Sonic Team has absolutely no faith in Sonic the Hedgehog.

And nowhere else can this be more evident than Knuckles the Echidna, once an important part of the Sonic franchise with his own lore, his own clan, his own purpose, has now become the butt of everyone's jokes. The hell he's been through as a concept perfectly mirrors what is going on to the Sonic Franchise and his Boom counterpart with his pitiful IQ score and absolute lack of stability naturally exemplify that in spades and barring the Archie Comics, this class clown as Roger put it is the most defined version of the poor Echidna. |16: That is sad. I am sad.|

DeeP DiSH: It didn't have to come to this, but it needs to be said so that you will understand my problems with a certain other franchise that's in a similar hole to the blue blur. So, let's get started. Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, time to Riot Loose with a Fandom Arson of Sonic Boom Episode 13: Unlucky Knuckles. Belts up, Gang. We're about to Land.

The episode begins with Knuckles on the Back Nine figuring out who putts first.

(0:25-0:32) DeeP DiSH: Took the words out of my mouth, Maurice. Yes, there are versions of Sonic I respect enough for the nickname to stick, you ain't one of them.

Maurice goes first when Tails flips the coin Tail-Side up and naturally gets a hole in one atop a freaking mountain, Knux keeps overshooting his balls and that's after he wasn't getting blocked by leaves and birbs.

(1:47-1:50) DeeP DiSH: Join the Club, Jackass.

As you can tell by his blazing temper, he's pretty much subjecting himself to become the butt of everyone's joke. So far, that is true to Knuckles' character, but it lacks the direction and purpose the Early Sonic games and especially the recently-shitcanned Archie Comics establishes for him. That can sadly describe the Sonic Franchise as well, with Sega knocked out of the Console Race, their faith in the Blue Blur suffered because of it, their indecisiveness over Sonic's true meaning and overreliance on recycled gimmicks such as Classic Sonic Levels in Forces and Wisps in Lost World. This particular Alliteration is one of the most well-defined version of the series that doesn't have greedy artists attached to them willing to sue Sega at a moment's notice. |16: That is sad. I am sad.|

Knux confronts the ladies on his frustrations with Sonic scoring onsies at Golf. |Linkara: I can't believe we live in a world where that phrase is actually possible.|

(2:34-2:44) DeeP DiSH: Sure you dont.

Sticks suggests pouring on so much bad luck that it immediately flips back to Zero like it tends to do in video games.

-Review-

With Creative Assembly and Sports Interactive already in-house, the acquisition of Relic was, for me at least, the moment it became apparent that Sega was changing in ways few would have thought possible even a few years before; a Japanese company synonymous with the console market now had three of the biggest names in PC strategy and simulation working side-by-side.

"Sega had a plan, to quietly become a powerhouse in PC publishing," Dowdeswell says. "Out of everything that happened in that auction, I don't think anyone had the same depth of thought and planning that Sega did. Sega knew how Relic would fit into its portfolio. It wasn't a shot in the dark. It had a plan for the future.

DeeP DiSH: In other words, Sega wants to move away from console game development and more towards being a steam publisher and there's a chance that Forces will be the final step in that bitter transition. |16: That is sad. I am sad.|

DeeP DiSH: Well, that show was complete and utter garbage, tune in next week where we break down Sonic's spiritual successor: Yooka-Laylee. Till then, here's your Arson Clip of the Day (2:44-3:07)

Yooka-Laylee

Once upon a time, there was a group of talented developers that were down on their luck throughout their existence, their first attempt at a franchise with Battletoads didn't do so hot, their planned Project Dream fell apart with the shifting of consoles, and the once kid-friendly Conker's Twelve Tales mutated into something else entirely. The only thing keeping them afloat was Donkey Kong but even that was yanked away from them by Microsoft buying them out and slowly draining away at their vitality til it became a shriveled corpse of itself with its brands neglected and its staff having drifted away... until now.

DeeP DiSH: Enter Playtonic Games, born from a gathering of longtime Rare devs that want to revive the 3D Platformer with a familiar flair attached to a fresh IP which prides itself on being a spiritual successor to Sonic the Hedgehog! Ladies and Gentlemen of the mob, time to RiOT loose with a Fandom Arson of Yooka-Laylee for Steam. Belt's up, gang! We're about to land!

Already you can see the Sonic Similarities with its Villain Capital B, a greedy, egg-shaped mofo who acts to smother nature and goodness with the type of homogenized corporate atmosphere we've all come to dread Microsoft for with its strict focus on its commander in Chief! The scheme of the day is to suck in all the books in the world including the One Book: a powerful reality manipulating macguffin which can mold the world to its whim. Knowing that danger is beginning, its magical Pagies scatter to the wind and it's up to our heroes to gather them together.

DeeP DiSH: And the way Rare designed these characters and the first world prove how this game wear the Blue Blur's legacy on its sleeve.

Rocking the green scales of a chameleon is Yooka, his cocksure but friendly demeanor is showcased with his facial expressions and the shape of his head, body and especially his tail prove him to be someone capable of seemlessly curling up into a ball unlike most modern designs of Sonic.

DeeP DiSH: Bonus Points for rocking one of my boi DiGi's favorite colors, mate. Speaking of, lets compare and contrast with Freedom Planet's Sasha.

For instance Yooka and Sasha have similar builds and both have companions that can fly. Both have a wide array of friends and enemies corresponding to the contrasting tone of each game. And Sasha's light purple compliments Yooka's green just as much as Laylee's deep purple does within the context of their games.

DeeP DiSH: And it's with Laylee's rather ambitious demeanor that we realize the core theme of Yooka-Laylee's world: Capitalism.

And I don't mean the fool's gold crony capitalism, I mean full red-blooded americana capitalism where you pay the corresponding price of a specific object and you get it. In Yooka-Laylee, Capital B is driven by earning as much money as he can squeeze out of the consumer, Trowzer supplies moves like you would sell power-ups for mobile games via microtransactions, the environment of Hivory Towers is not only intentionally toxic both figuratively and literally but a grim reminder of what Microsoft has done to Rare.

DeeP DiSH: Even the development of the game keeps to the theme, all the way down to borrowing the typical elements of a Sonic Game.

Tribalstack Tropics is designed to be yet another Green Hill Zone, Shovel Knight has been shamelessly shoved into the game to advertise his, Yooka's design harkens back to Sonic as we've brought up several times, and I do believe that the idea of expanding the already vast worlds with the Pagies you collect is supposed to symbolize DLC.

DeeP DiSH: But you're probably wondering about the Gameplay. Well, that's where Trowzer comes in.

A basic jumpman at first, Yooka unlocks quite a few moves that harken back to his hedgehog predecessor. You can curl up into a ball, spin dash, but no flow-breaking homing attack, not that the flow's pacing's fast enough for that to break but I'm sure the sequel would fix that. He can also whip it good with his tail and slam his bat buddy Laylee around, but she doesn't mind, what matters is getting her book back so she can make a mint off of it. Her ability to glide and later on just straight-up fly makes her a boon for rounding up those last pagies and pirate skulls. And her sonar based moves are par for the course, since these boys like to go all in on their nods to nature almost as much as their puns.

DeeP DiSH: Bottom line, as a much more realistic bat than Rouge, Laylee will be finding herself pleasantly surprised in a Sonic Loop.

There are five fantastic worlds in Yooka Laylee, each with its own distinct theme to it. As previously stated, Tribalstack Tropics is a much more vibrant and standout tribute to Green Hill than any of the Green Hill knockoffs farted out by Sega over the years, Glitterglaze Glacier is about s fun as an Ice Level should be, Moodymaze Marsh is criticised for imitating a similar level in the original Donkey Kong Country level, Capitol Cashino fits in with the rest of the ritzy levels in the Sonic Canon, and Galleon Galaxy boldly goes where Rareware's never gone before. If critics see the worlds as just too small, then just expand it out with more Pagies and behold its boss.

DeeP DiSH: Despite some Solid Gameplay, breathtaking levels and a memorable level-unlocking system, there are a few bugs in the system.

-Complaints-

DeeP DiSH: But does that take away from what's an amazing game, shell no!

This is a Game I take pride in calling a Successor to Sonic, on par with Freedom Planet and Spark the Electric Jester. The character dynamic of Yooka's kind-hearted clashing with Laylee's cynical yet sympathetic personality fits the theme, the levels are challenging when they need to be and the clever subtext is a wonder to behold. While I sadly haven't backed the game myself when it was on Kickstarter, I must say that this is a great start to the revival of 3D Platformers we'll soon see if A Hat In Time and Super Mario Odyssey can keep the bass pumping.

DeeP DiSH: Just go to your local game shop when it lands on the Switch and see the magic for yourself.

Why Tetsuya Nomura is the Cancer of Square Enix

Little over fifteen years ago, me and my dad bought a PS2 with the addition of a few bargain bin titles to try out each of the PS2's features, Neverending Story for her DVD player, Crash Bandicoot: Wrath of Cortex for the console itself, and for the built-in emulator of its predecessor... (Final Fantasy VIII) Yeah, I have had the misfortune of playing the weakest member in Final Fantasy's trilogy of PSone titles, all the way to the emo, soulless, slit-your-throats-open dissatisfactory end. I wanted to wash away the suck that if left untreated would have tainted my interest in Squaresoft for good, luckily I had a friend who had Final Fantasy VII who told me about his Journeys as the adventureguy Cloud Strife and his crack team of rebel fighters, though hearing about his anger towards Sephiroth killing Aeris couldn't necessarily do that scene as much justice as watching that particular cutscene in a playthrough or... hell, just playing it myself. I took interest in how it ended, and how the spell Holy washed away every threat to the earth's existence, humans possibly included, and this gave me the idea that the whole mindfuck of an ending FF8 had recently thrust upon me at the time was the effects of Holy and that VII was occurring seas apart from the Hydra Sewage that was Final Fantasy VIII. What does this little story have to do with this video, you ask? Overambition. Overprotection. Cancer. All of these are symptoms that propelled Tetsuya Nomura up the ladder into the safe slot of 'Star Director' by sheer luck and we're here to deconstruct how he made his meteoric rise, his shortcomings as a creator, and his effects on Square Enix as a company

How Nomura got upstairs

I believe it all started with the ten million units they sold with Final Fantasy VII, a lot of that could be attributed to the simplistic character designs that Nomura-san has drawn for this particular game. But those only exist because of the Hardware Limitations of the game and the polygonal shapes used to design them ultimately have to be dynamic and expressive in order to emote. The gameplay and more importantly the story is more or less because of the studio staff working at Square at the time. Yoshinori Kitase and Hironobu Sakaguchi hammered out the story, Gameplay was breathtaking and so very satisfying, and the moments that wove the story together is still talked about around the world wide web even today.

DeeP DiSH: In fact, it's because of this easily impressionable young internet generation of Millennials that caused Nomura to happen in the first place. And among the reasons to consider myself a member of Generation Z, this is the reason why Kingdom Hearts as it is cannot receive a TV Show.

Why Nomura is Bad for Games

DeeP DiSH: There are dozens of reasons why we've chosen to describe Nomura as the Cancer of the company but here are five that was listed by the fission mailure blog, real informative site, go check it out, hell, go make your own blog if you want, truth dies in the dark no matter what subject we're talking about.

First off, let's talk about how Nomura pretty much screwed over the original Tokyo Team behind Kingdom Hearts II as well as the Osaka team that's worked on nearlynevery game since, all by spreading himself too thinly across his personal creations and his latest contribution to Final Fantasy Versus-XIII. That game would linger in development for seven freakin years with barely any progress! This game, with a team of two hundred people working on it, had seen no progress made on it for seven years with Nomura at the helm, despite his protestations that he was focusing so much effort on it. Seven years of development, and by the time the subseries it was supposed to be a part of outright concluded in Late 2012 Nomura was considering the nuclear option and scrapping the plot and voice work in favor of a musical.

DeeP DiSH: Cause we all know how much we liked Atlantica in Kingdom Hearts II, Right!?

Versus XIII was so incomplete that the game had to be outright cancelled with its characters and plot recycled into Final Fantasy XV with Director Hajime Tabata and his team were basically building the gameplay from the ground up, because no work had been done on it. GG Nomura.

DeeP DiSH: Now, for this next point, I want to play a little game with you. Describe to me the plot of either the Dark Seeker Saga of Kingdom Hearts or the Fabula Nova Crystallis in three hundred words or less, in a way that somebody who wasn't familiar with any of the games in it could understand. Leave your answers in the comments section below and I will read them aloud in a future video later in the year. My Advice: good luck writing those words!

The first Final Fantasy XIII alone feels like it was written in three hours by someone who was very drunk, but when you add in every other game in its little sub-series, it becomes a tangled mess that you could spend hours trying to explain in a way that didn't make you sound like a lunatic. These Games include time travel because of course he would, multiple dimensions because of course he would, several different orders of godlike being because why bother with a full heiarchy, a shadowy substance that gives life but also kills people because Bokurano was a thing right? Everyone becoming immortal because of course he would, and France solely because of course he would. And it's here where you understand that this story has been spread far too thin across multiple titles, Kingdom Hearts has eight games and four compilations on PS2, PS3, PSP, PS4, GBA, 3DS, DS Classic, PC and Mobile Phones alone!

DeeP DiSH: Jeezus! If this is what the Dark Seeker Arc looks like, I shutter to think of what the Cell Arc is gonna do to us as a Fandom!

I mean, come the shell on! I shouldn't need to explain why both those things are a problem - especially the latter, which apparently assumes that the franchise's entire audience has enough money to buy the same game three fucking times over! - and why they put the lie to the idea of Nomura being a writer of any ability.

DeeP DiSH: Which is not even getting started on how his stories always take themselves so very, very seriously.

But enough about how Nomura can't write his way out of a corner, let's talk about a playable character in Final Fantasy X which Nomura designed the cast for. It's not entirely clear on how far Nomura was actually involved in that game, but one thing that we do know for sure is that he designed your team's resident maternal figure and doll-wielding Black Mage, Lulu, all the way down to her belt made out of dozens, or maybe even hundreds of interlocking belts, and while that's a ridiculous idea all on its own, what really stands out is why Nomura did this. According to him, it was his challenge to the game's visual programmers, that they would have to recognise the ridiculous pattern of belts and reproduce it consistently throughout the game. He said, at the same time, that he makes a point of giving the game's visual programmers a 'challenge' with each game he designs on.

DeeP DiSH: That greedy... disrespectful weeaboo trashbag!

Let's not make any bones here, the job of the visual programmers is more difficult than the job of the character designers - and I say that with the utmost respect for the character designers, because it's not that that's an easy job, it's that it doesn't involve working within the limits of available technology, it doesn't involve attempting to translate someone else's two dimensional work into a three dimensional format, and it doesn't involve having to consistently do these things over the course of a forty-plus hour game. It is astounding to me that Nomura, the one with the objectively easier job, would take it upon himself to challenge his colleagues, as if their job is a cakewalk that needs to be spiced up.

DeeP DiSH: Yes, but this was an age of Hardware Limitations so of course it would be difficult to program this tacky belt-dress you came up with.

So to recap, He drags his lower-tier staff through the mud because he believes their role seems as easy as his own, His horrific writing has taught us the hard way about the perils of a shonen manga structure in a video game franchise, and I don't know about you, but I find it a little suspicious that Kingdom Hearts III was labeled in two trailers as: Now in Development.

What happened to Square

Like I said, Overambition, Overprotection, Cancer. You could trace this back to Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within, which was intended to herald the beginning of Virtual Actors to take our jobs away from flesh and blood like with every other robotizing industry we currently have choking out our humanity, Overambition.

Fairly OddParents: WTF HAPPENED?

Secret Origin of Denzel Crocker

Dimmsdale Daze

Ya got yer knife in me pretty deep, Viacom. So why aren't you twisting it?

Unnamed Episode

PC Publisher

With Creative Assembly and Sports Interactive already in-house, the acquisition of Relic was, for me at least, the moment it became apparent that Sega was changing in ways few would have thought possible even a few years before; a Japanese company synonymous with the console market now had three of the biggest names in PC strategy and simulation working side-by-side.

"Sega had a plan, to quietly become a powerhouse in PC publishing," Dowdeswell says. "Out of everything that happened in that auction, I don't think anyone had the same depth of thought and planning that Sega did. Sega knew how Relic would fit into its portfolio. It wasn't a shot in the dark. It had a plan for the future.

MARVEL VS DC: The Other Guys

Anakin: Hi! I'm a Lucas!

Mickey: And I'm...Confused as all hell? Anakin, what the hell is this-

Anakin: Hot Dog, was January a great month for movies like last January's 'Strange Magic' or what!?

Mickey: What! But that movie bombed at the box office!

Anakin: At least it ain't a Michael Bay Joint! {13 Hours}

Mickey: Seriously, Anakin, you're scaring me here!

Anakin: Of course I remember the Revenant! Why would I forget?

Mickey: You're not willing to talk to me unless I play along, huh?

Anakin: I have a date with a senator, some skittles, and a {The Boy} Six-Year-Old Boy

Mickey: Ugh, please master Jedi Skywalker, tell us what other films await us in January...

Anakin: {Ride Along 2} I wanna die, too!

Mickey: Of course you would feel that after watching {Norm of the North} Rob Schider Cartoons all day.

Anakin: At least it wasn't a gritty Hollywood remake of Uncle {Dirty-} Grandpa!

Mickey: Come on, I was just asking you to go see Kung Fu Panda 3, DreamWorks Really needs the Help.

Anakin: Not as much help as The 5th Wave's gonna need!

(Spiderman and Iron Man are sitting there, watching the mess go down.)

Spiderman: Geez, Tony... How long are they gonna keep this up?

Iron Man: Bout half an hour? Why?

Spiderman: Oh, my god...

Iron Man: Happy third anniversary of the Disney Infinity Announcement.

Spiderman: And Many Mooooore...

HDG-R: What to Expect Smash 5

Opening Comic

Thesis

Step One: Time to Cut the Cheese

Clones are often a No-No when building a Smash Game, so We'll be cutting Lucina and Dark Pit. Capcom's having its share of troubles so we might as well say goodbye to Ryu and Rocky Here... But there's always DLC, am I Right?

Step Two: The comeback Kids

People all over are super pissed that this O'Donnel Chap didn't make it back to Smash 4...

(Squirtle and Young Link Confirmed)

Step Three: This Stage is Just too Small

Ridley deserves a seat in the Roster like the Fine Brothers deserve Subscribers. The fact of the Matter is that if you try scaling him down, then all the fun of the guy would be lost... If you want a Rep for Metroid, I think I know a guy or two...

(Adam Malcovich and Space Marines)

Step Four: Gotta Catch 'Em All!

Step Five: Trophy Tussle

Step Six: Tentpole Overdose

Last time, Mario got two newcomers and a returning Vet. Now its the Zeldaverse's Turn in the limelight. Ghirahim and Demise for Skyward Sword, Young Link for Majora's Mask and for Windwaker, we have...

(Tetra in a realistic bod.)

Step Seven: New Tentpole Overdose

Step Eight: Can't Beat the Classics

Do you know what I miss in gaming, Fellow Kids?

(DK Jr. Confirmed)

Step Nine: Spinning Off the Deep End

Smash Underground

Smash Bros. Underground

Shorts

Thesis

Shorts is a magnificent butterfly of corny CGI and Adam West Batman-grade writing produced by Robert Rodriguez, director of one of the Spy Kids movies and Adventures of Shark Boy and Lava Girl. I got it at my Local Library when I went to renew my card there, and hopefully, the whole tradition of me reviewing random flicks I find at the Library on my monthly visits to Memere's will probably stick, I guess. It's about the wonders of childhood and how technology is kind of eating away at it, I guess... So it's up to a magical macguffin to tie us all back together! A moral you can find at the butt of a cereal box, how forfilling... Let's just get started.

Episode Zero: The Blinkers

The Movie begins with a segment with these two characters who have a stare contest and they go about their day during said competition, goin' to school, playing outside, playing inside, even sleeping with their freaking eyes open. I-Is this even safe? Are there going to need medical attention after this? The one time that it ends, they don't know who won so they keep it going throughout the entire rest of the goddamn movie.

Prologue

So, yeah. It's called Shorts because the film is told in little episodes shown 'Completely Out of Order', a novel type of storytelling, almost like a kiddie-version of Pulp Fiction. I guess I have to introduce you to the cast now, init. Jimmy Bennett plays 'Toe' Thompson, a lonely excuse for a human being and predictably the main character. Lug and Loogie, the Bulk and Skull characters who have a nack for treasure because movie. Helvanka, the Snooty rich girl you find in every form of media that has a school in it. Jake Short plays a germaphobe and also Steve Mobs is in this. The way he pitted a man and his wife against each other to come up with a big feature to edge out the competition. I have purchased myself a Purple Pyramid specifically to spite the man! So let's get this tube started, shall we?

Episode 2: Alien8ed

You have clicked on the first short to be showcased in the movie, Alien8ed, where we meet 'Toe' Thompson himself and his goofy braces which I can't afford since the corporate establishment running the political oligarchy doesn't want to pay for our healthcare. Also, turns out his parents are the captains of the opposing research teams, tightly tying it back to the bloody Black Box right alongside Mobs' young son Cole Black and daughter Helvetica.

Helvetica: because I hate you?

Toe: Because you love me. <Tsundere>

<FUCK THIS MOVIE>

Then she stuffs the kid into a trash can... twice. We get a scene with the blinkers where one kid offers him life advice and a Reeses Nutrageous Bar... out of infinity. Also, Cole overhears his narration and promptly chases him to a construction site where the bullies try to stone the smeg out of them. And this is where we first see the Rainbow Rock that inspired me to create an anime concept where Never Fairies shift to human size to become Xorcerers I guess and fight wish monsters or something. He wishes for friends and it triggers first contact with an alien species, One that can fit inside his backpack but still, their UFO vehicles use their tiny tractor beams to cook a gourmet buffet I would love to help myself to if the budget allowed me to... After a scene with the parents, we get to see a room cleaning montage that acts as a showcase of how far we've come since Disney's own Mary Poppins before the aliens move on to fix up his teeth. But not before we see the sister barking at her loser boyfriend, she makes a wish that will clearly bite us in the ass later. Toe squares off with the bullies on the following day, and delivers a prompt dunking to Helvetica before chemistry class.

Helvetica: Where are your braces?!

Toe: Up my nose.

{GET DUNKED ON!}

We get a rather hilarious bit of a Chemistry class scene, alien metalheads, Helvetica eating a failfish right out a fishtank, infinite Nutrageous bar kid shows up again, and the two twerps survive a fall that probably might have killed them in real life... I think this is a precursor to Sharknado. During their recovery in detention, Helvetica eats chicken noodle soup... with her feet. Holy Fuck, it is a Sharknado prequel.

Also Mr. Black intends to fire Toe's parents at the costume party because evil. If you want to see how that turns out, click on Mum and Dad. If you want to know how this shitstorm of a plot started, click on Infinite Nutrageous kid and his brothers.

Episode 1: The Wishing Rock

You've clicked on the first short in the movie's chronological order, The Wishing Rock. We start on a rainy day while Infinite Nutrageous kid is playing video games with his brothers, but he's bored out of his mind so it's outside they go... The storm having cleared up in Black Falls upon his suggestion. The trio make their way to the wishing rock at the end of a rainbow. This kid named Lougie wishes for an endless supply of candy and so begins the tale of Infinite Nutrageous Kid. His opening act is wishing up a Fortress, but the three fuck it up and loose the rock in the canyon of doom that was also wished up by Loogie, where a crocodile eats the rock and wishes for evolution... okay. Then they're 'Rescued' by a Pterodactyl, huh. And he wishes for... Telephonesis, Wut!?

Luckily Loogie wishes themselves home and wishes that one of them was Super Smart: Baby Lisa, who can now communicate with people with her mind. So the kids catapult the rock out of here before the idea for world peace crossed their minds... As baby Lisa put it, they'd find a way to screw it all up. This leads to Episode 2 and all the craziness that follows, so if you want to see a short that actually happened in the movie, click on the dork with glasses. But if you want to see a short that clearly didn't happen, click on Baby Lisa.

Episode 2.5.: Super Spurts

You've dived balls first into my fictional Short, 'Super Spurts' It starts with Infinite Nutrageous Kid and his brothers asking Lisa for lottery numbers since she was wished into being super-smart enough to see the future. She finds the wishing rock under her seat by wishing she was old enough to handle a Mr Potato Head, being aged up into a four year old by sitting on a magical rock. How inappropriate.

Lisa crawls a bit then waddles a bit, ages herself up again to Loogie's age to ratchet her walk to a sprint, which leads to her jumping through a window... which means nothing because she wishes that she could fly upon the jump. She has a brief chat with Toe upon his kind dunking Helvetica, telling him that revenge will get him nowhere but 'six feet underneath a hole in the ground'. She wishes for super strength when she has to look for something that some guy's missing, and a martial arts tournament

Episode 4: Big Bad Booger

GHOSTBUSTERS (2016)

2016's Ghostbusters is the worst movie ever. It's a full on centerpiece of the worst aspects of female-centric Reboots on par with Jane Foster becoming Thor, and the cast and crew are just the most generic paint-by-numbers worksuits hired onto a project simply to just 'Get it Done.' Penned as a sort of soft reboot where the events of the franchise happened, but they've faded into obscurity by ghost activity drying up or something, Yeah. That's what you get for not franchising at the end of the first movie, you lugnuts! So now we have a new team of Ghostbusters consisting of four independent young women, an engineer, a psychologist, a mathematician and a negro minstrel show with coltish legs and a Tyler Perry movie for a mouth. She is the worst character in the whole movie, her actress is a self-entitled whore whom I hope shall go to hell before she dies. But I'm getting ahead of myself, let's dig into the juicy stuff, shall we.

Amy Paskel, once the CEO of Sony Pictures at the time, always wanted an all girl ghostbuster movie being the #Messiah Slave that she is, and flogged it to any director that could take it, Director Paul Fieg only signed on if he would be given creative freedom over it. Emma Stone, Amy Shumer among others were eyeballed, but all they could get alongside Mellissa McCarthy from the scraps of SNL were Kristen Wigg, Leslie Jones and Kate McKennen. Two of which I never heard of until this movie, though I wish I could forget about the formermost one... Things were going smoothly despite the signs that it just shouldn't be. But then the Sony hacking hit the film division, leaking as many eMails as possible which revealed corruption of superiors and their bigotry towards their pawns. Paskel was fired and replacement Tom Rothman cut the budget by several millions right the fuck before filming, and the disaster scenario being recounted and showcased on 4chan in the same manner as Green Lantern and Fant-4-Shame for all to see...

Boy who Would be Queen v Just the Two of Us

Bionicle Legends of Metru Nui

Legends of Metru Nui is fucking awesome and that's a rarity for sequels.

Exchange Student Zero

DeeP DiSH: This year marks the 20th anniversary of an Iconic Monster Collecting series that influenced a generation, touched countless lives, and brought people of all races together... I am of course talking about Battle Day Zero! (thnx 5 watching)

Dr Eggman's Tomato Sauce

Last Week, I reviewed a Sonic Boom Episode that was actually good enough to swipe the top spot from BDFF. Try to wrap your head around that logic... Then again, Dino Posse's fucking horrible, so what do I know? Today, However, we're gonna blow that episode out of the water!

Having made its debut two episodes prior, Dr Eggman's Tomato Sauce was an episode my co-writer Robbie Walker has begged me to review since we started homing in our attacks on the show to begin with, and I figured I might as well get my piece out there since it is one of the few episodes Random actually enjoyed.

Recap

We begin our episode with Tails installing a stereo in his Plane.

Knuckles: Do you wuv your plane, Tails, do you wuv it!?

Well, Tails does need a helping hand to, y'know, work the shaft if he needs to.

Tails agrees to follow Sonic and his crew, but only to collect more parts for his Plane, and guess who they find selling Tomato Sauce.

Eggman: <Boasting>

Sonic: This isn't good...

So Sonic does his thing, but Eggman states that the Sauce isn't part of any evil scheme.

Eggman: (Tries his Sauce) See, It's Harmless and Delicious. You Try.

Sonic: I think I'll pass.

Oh, It's one of those episodes!

Eggman: I think I found Sonic the Hedgehog's weakness: He's Afraid of Tomato Sauce!

Actually, it's that Sonic cannot swim for beans, but that's not really the point here, point is his taste buds are taken for a ride and Tails goes to analyze for any devious tricks eggman might have up his sleeves based solely on assumption. And you all know the saying Robbie says about those things.

Sonic's watch appears to be on the fritz as well as Knux's Headphones, Amy's Artifact Tracker, Sticks' Flashlight and Tails' Plane. I wonder why?

<Eggman on the Comedy Chimp Show>

Well, I've heard worse career challenges for supervillains. (Donald Trump)

But it turns out it's not the sauce that he's using in his scheme, but the cans containing them, That's actually pretty intriguing!

<Sticks being Sticks>

Just wait til you see Sonic Dream Collection.

Predictably, Sonic and his crew manage to fend off the bots for a bit, But Tails starts to choke when he sees his plane... because of course he would. Tails tries to talk it out of the whole 'killer machine' thing... but... Take it, Michael Bein

<It cannot be reasoned with.>

Sonic and Company show up sans Tails to Square off against Eggman with a fancy new junk robot. Tails struggles to regain control and Sonic and Company struggle to tear apart the mech as it keeps pulling itself together

Eggman: Face it, ya blue blockhead, I've got this one in the bag!

Tails flies in to snatch the remote and deactivate Eggman's modifications.

<The final scene of the episode>

Conclusion

This episode is actually the closest to the whole action-adventure angle the show advertises itself towards that I've seen in the .7 years we've been reviewing this show. The choirography of the fight sequence was decent, the jokes hit hard and fast, the characterization's top notch and you can easily say that Alan Denton and Greg Hahn have proven themselves to be the best fit for the Sonic Franchise going forward. It doesn't grind to a halt like Late Fees or decicrate continuity like Tails' Crush, this is an episode that was made by people who, y'know, actually care about these characters! Why is it so hard to find people who care nowadays? (Politics of Marketing) Oh, yeah, that's why.

You know, speaking of Fans, There's this fanmake of a particularly terrible episode we reviewed one which was the death knell for the Sonic Franchise. And he's offered to be a guest on whoever's willing to get it out there! What a guy! Too bad I don't have a sort of soapbox to kinda express my emotions towards a particular subject I like and/or dislike.

Roger: Oh, Hey there!

(Glares at TV Screen)

Oh, cool. I actually have one of those, that's nice.

Size Matters

So, Yeah. I have just now realized that now was the time

Marvel Memoire

In the six months since her last visit to the Marvel Universe, Gwenneth Joan Poole has seen better days.

One little slip up in North Korea has gotten Ironheart Injured, Squirrel Girl killed, and a new toy called the 'Genesis Nuke' fired at Yellowstone Park where the President was currently visiting. The result was a good three-hundred people dropped into her world from a licensed continuity and a government protection program that costs the comic house behind it their licence to create further comic in that mythos.

Under the watchful eye of the US Government run by the very president that she was partially responsible for killing (in-universe, of course.) Those three-hundred men, women and children went their separate ways. Some came to serve the newly-founded S.H.E.I.L.D organisation, some became archeological aces, some traveled the world and some lived in Gwen's neighborhood.

But the one thing they had in common was their effect on Gwen's faith in herself as a figure in the Universe she loved.

In the five years since the last known sighting of 'Gwenpool', The Marvel Universe has seen better days.

The Yellowstone Genesis has left America in shambles. The Gray Spaghetti plague melted every source of Carbon Dioxide within Nabraska, Kansas and a good chunk of Oklahoma, the devastation of which led scientists to stop it in its tracks before more of it became evidence against taxing Carbon Dioxide. The northeastern tip of America from Maine to New York became the Communist Combine of New Sweden and was reduced to a Sharia Shithole. Control of California, Nevada and Utah went to the now Disney-owned Mollosia for Silicon Valley experts and Disney Imagineers alike work to convert the land into Crystal Kickassia. And the leftover Washington Establishment claimed Nega-Korea, consisting of Washington, Oregon and Idaho. The only remotely American States include Texas, Arkansas, Kentucky among others and the corporate giants of America moved there and allowed free market handle just about everything as America intended. So it's not all doom and gloom...

That area goes to its superhero community, if they're not suing each other for physical and psychological damage, they're out in space, dead, dead and replaced with alternative universe versions or just hiding from the limelight in shame of just how toxic the community had become without Steve Rogers to keep them grounded. There was a hole that needed to be filled with actual love and care, not this virtue-signalling and purse puppy crap. And sadly, the only other person capable of such love was ignoring the comics in which the world was portrayed.

Unwilling Gwenpool

Gwen is comfortable with her job at the Movie Theater, Teddy is thankful that she's put her adventures in the comic world behind her, her parents are glad to see her at work for once. But once you make the fourth wall pop, It won't be long til your absence stops. Nowhere would that be more evident than when she received Defeated Iron Man #1.

How I would have handled Belle's Magical World

Okay, So Disney's Beauty and the Beast is celebrating its 25th Anniversary. And with that comes memories of what passed as Sequels during that time, how terrible they were, how they could have been prevented, but not what can be done to fix them. That's where I come in, there is only one logical way for these movies to make sense: If they were set in another universe entirely! Case and Point: If the director in charge thought a bit more like me, The Enchanted Christmas won't have a framing device, but if it had to, I would have a loving couple spending Christmas with their family including their young son, Christopher Robin. As in:

Winnie the Pooh and the Beast's Beauty

The hook is that Christopher Robin's world of make-believe: The Hundred Acre Wood, is in essence a hodgepodge of stories and dreams that Christopher Robin has ever played with. And every sunday, His mother reads him a bedtime story she's written

?

DeeP DiSH: (Sitting through Teen Titans Go like: uuuurrrrghhhh...) I can understand your pain, America. It's hard being the only one in your squad who's interested in the Emoji Movie, especially when I compared it as being Superior to Spiderman Homecoming. They're both train wrecks, yes, but they're interesting train wrecks, ones where you know how it's going to happen before stepping into the theater but can't help but watch out of pity. Lord knows just as many folks who harken the Emoji Movie as being a shitshow to end all shitshows gravitate towards Homecoming like the Millennials they are for reasons I and my extra half-decade in existence experience can't possibly comprehend. I just want you to know that my opinions don't exactly line up with the rest of the crew and thus does not represent the whole. With this little PSA out of the way, let's figure out what to do with our time since we're here... Christ, this? The last thing this trash deserves is our attention, they've certainly done enough with that already! Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog, I'm sure Robbie would appreciate it, but I'm not in the mood. Perhaps a Video Game might help, with my writing schedule, god no... What should I do...

-Cyberteam in Akihabara-

DeeP DiSH: Oh, geez. Not now, here goes! I can't stop it!

(Space Walken)

Released in 19--

Top Ten Archie Sonic Characters

DeeP DiSH: Here on this show, we tend to review what crawls into our minds. Like when I reviewed an episode of Whatever Happened to Robot Jones or praised the Emoji Movie when everyone wants the whole thing wiped from the face of the earth. But it's not all fun and lolcows, we often dive into politics.

-Salami-

Yeah, Not sure if I could get in trouble for such things, but it's there. And as if the real world isn't enough, there's also Archie's kind forgetting that hiring writers for licensed comics requires contracts to keep the talent from begging for licensing fees because of the comics industry collapsing under the boot of Marvel Comics and Diamond Distribution. Leave it to Ken Penders to start the domino effect which wiped out half of Mobius' history, populace and even the god forsaken name a few crappy years back and then came back for the rest on this year's Fuck You, It's January.

-Endless Trash-

We reach out to you, Mister Trump to send the mother of all C&D orders through your honorable Supreme Court to strike down the shackles for Sonic's new home at IDW. Out of the 244 characters lost, we have ten samples of characters that best exemplify everything that made the Archie Sonic Comics worth reading.

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02

01

We, the justices of the Supreme Court of America hereby decree that any and all intellectual property produced by Sega of America's licensing agreement to Archie Publishing be placed into the Public Domain for all fellow Americans to use as they please. This includes exclusive comic rights towards the current holder of the Sonic the Hedgehog License for Comic Publication.

I think you can give IDW a Very Merry Christmas.

Top Ten Archie Megaman Characters

Last time on Fandom Arson, we looked at Archie's legendary record-shattering licensed Comic for Sonic the Hedgehog. This Week, we're diving balls first into the accidental face of the Super Genesis Wave himself: Mega Man!

Late Fees Rogerified

The Sonic Fandom has been a well of creativity on par with MLP, Steven Universe, and just recently, Undertale. But back to Sonic, one of it's biggest contributers and harshest critics is Roger Van der Wilde!

Renowned for his Disected series where we details whatever details he finds off about the Sonic Franchise... or japanese media as a whole, Roger's a pretty entertaining fellow to hang out with and toss around ideas.

Once Upon a Townsville

Opening Skit

DeeP DiSH: How nice of you to lend your talents to Team Plasma, Victor Vivisector. As the highest leautenant to the very captain of its current flying lair, our talents have worked non stop to defeat our most notorious target: a group of Andillites that shift from between Pokemon and Human Forms. The Seven Sabres, they are called. We've already had one of them time out in her Human Form, rendering her a Nothlit. Now all that's left is to destroy the others and the Andillite posing as their trainer.

Krump: So, we gonna get in their way? Fight em off or sumthin'?

DeeP DiSH: Actually, You're supposed to keep any sort of backup from coming to her aid, like Mimi who's flying in on a Skarmory as we speak.

Hip Hop: And If the Furry Force is on the Prowl?

Vivisector: Morsels compared to my latest creation: The Scaley Squad!

Hip Hop: Hope you're saving those crackers specificly for those overgrown critters, man. Anyone else wouldn't be as comfortable with fighting a dragon with junk like that. Hell, he won't even stop rubbin'!

Vivisector: Ugh, Hopefully, they'll just wipe each other out.

Krump: And after that, we can take the forest of both the worlds we're connecting here and turn them all into beautiful parking lots, right.

Vivisector: Nope, Probably just get a regular job, I'm not even a bad guy anymore, I just want the Furry Force to be dead!

FF Clip 0:27-0:47

DeeP DiSH: I know, Dude, I know, a whole smegton of toxic musk turns the whole world into fucking furries, everybody drowns in a sea of wolf cum and I am required to sit through an episode of the Powerpuff Girls Reboot.

-Thesis-

DeeP DiSH: Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, time to riot loose with a Fandom Arson of Powerpuff Girls 2016 Variety: Episode 17: Once Upon a Townsville. Belts Up, Vivisector?

Vivisector: It's too Big, Ugh, the tip is so red.

DeeP DiSH: Too Bad, Loser, We're about to land.

Recap

The episode begins in a faraway fairytale world where the first new character from the Powerpuff Reboot is fleeing from a dragon, Begging for a Prince that will clearly never come.

(0:32-0:38) DeeP DiSH: Dear Christ, you're going to be one of those princesses, are you?

She falls into a magic well and into Buttercup's Arms. After a sound thrashing of the aformentioned Dragon, the Princess, named Bluebell, shows irritation towards the person who she just- Oh God! Bad Touch! Send him in!

<Singing>

This is litterally someone singing her own made up lyrics over a freaking Disney Song! Belle's Song, to be more precise. This has got to be one of the most shameless pieces of Plagerism I've ever seen! It's amazing that Disney isn't watching this show, They'd sue their asses on the spot!

(3:28 - 3:35) DeeP DiSH: STOP! Just spit it out alright?

(3:50 - 4:06) DeeP DiSH: Actually, I think that's a metafore, a pretty shallow excuse for equally shallow behavior in the shape of a metafore but a metafore none the less...

So yeah, she keeps tossing herself in mortal danger in order to beckon her prince forward to her side. Even trying to dunk herself into a volcano before the Powerpuffs try to teach her the lesson of the episode: Being that you should be able to do whatever you want with your life beyond just waiting for something to happen.

DeeP DiSH: And how exactly do they express this lesson when it's clear she's dull as a sack of hammers?!

(5:10-5:22) DeeP DiSH: *Expression of Disgust.*

(5:25-5:41) DeeP DiSH: It can't get worse, this fucking hit job we've got cannot get any worse! (Alarms are blareing) What just happened to make it worse?!

Krump: Uh, Boss. There's a Pokemon zooming up there.

DeeP DiSH: Then try scanning her into the global Pokedex?

Hip-Hop: We tried that, but that piece of Plasma Junk can't find her.

DeeP DiSH: Then put it on screen. Cambot, can we at least get a stock image on the display screen (Looks at the screen to find a Lunala) My god, It's the fallen Andalite, Impossible, she's gone nothlit and yet she still manages to morph a Lunala!

Krump: Then that means that they aren't really andalites at all, right?

DeeP DiSH: Certainly, who else wouldn't get stuck in their pokemon morph when the morpher was a pokemon right from the start! (Is knocked off his seat by an impact)

Vivisector: Oh, My God! She Breached the Hull!

DeeP DiSH: We can't let a Lunala get here when their tech's two regions behind, They'll be walking into a slaughterhouse! Hip Hop, Krump, Attack!

<Hip Hop and Krunk Kill themselves>

(6:00) Also, Nice Disney Reference to the one that charted the course of evolution for the Animation industry you insensitve dick holes!

She's dead fucking set on being rescued by a prince to the point where she's delighted to see the dragon come back.

(6:57-7:00) DeeP DiSH: And clueless to boot.

(7:00-7:07) DeeP DiSH: Me neither... Knowing what this is going to set up, Bluebell here's got no choice but to... Oh no.

(7:14-7:16) DeeP DiSH: Sweet lord, No!

(7:19-7:31) DeeP DiSH: WHYYYYYYYYY?!

Repurposing 'Make a Man out of You' to your sexist self-objectification is not a way to make you endearing, Bluebell! In fact, that makes you an insult to all of Disney's Efforts to break those molds over the past few decades! You go to your room, Show, until you know what real satire is like!

(7:58-8:14) DeeP DiSH: Aiming for those Legasus Glutes, I see.

The Prince finally shows up again, but it turns out she is completely over the fool and leaves him in the dust to start her life independantly.

(8:55-9:10) DeeP DiSH: Smooth Fucking Move, Tenesson. (A Reference to Yuri Lowenthal)

Conclusion

Why the fuck hasn't Disney Sued their asses for this shit! Is it the parodic lyrics, is it the design conforming to Clarence's art style like the rest of the characters?! What is it about your abuse of animation as an art form that's allowed you to get away with being a shallow parody of what's popular? That's what it is, This show is nothing more than the exact personification of Tumblr from the memes to

Lion: You see, Vivisector, This is why we must teach the Scalely Squad compassion, So that we don't-

Vivisector: Fuck That! (Kills the Crocodile as DeeP DiSH Tramples on the Velociraptor)

DeeP DiSH: (Calls Ghetsis)

Ghetsis: Hello?

DeeP DiSH: Yeah, Ditto. Remember that whole 'manipulate Team Plasma into getting a Pokemon-Trainer Duo to sacrifice on both universes to ressurrect Demon King Demise' thing.

Ghetsis: Yes, my master, I am listening.

DeeP DiSH: Good, because we're angling to make the sacrifice of the other world be that universe's N and his Zoroa. How about you, V?

Vivisector: Just to be safe, I'm gonna burn this place down with all of us in it!

DeeP DiSH: So, Call back when you're the other half of Demon King Demise! Bye. *Hangs up* So, Wanna go to grillby's?

Vivisector: You're buying, right?

DeeP DiSH: Totes.

(Credits) And that concludes the final broadcast of the Cosby Comet, While we face the imminant combination of this world and the world of the original nuzlocke, make sure to click on our other videos if you want to see more of our shenanagans, like favorite comment and subscribe if you're a conformist, follow us on social media if you feel so inclined and hey! if you like what we do and want to see more of it, hop on over to our patreon page and drop a few dollars our way. Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, Thanks for RiOTing Loose with our Fandom Arson and until all are one, Good Fight, Good Night and remember, I'm DeeP DiSH... And I welcome Death!

Don't Judge Me

And now that you know how network meddling can fuck over a show. The episode we're talking about an episode that can rival franchise death nail Late Fees in terms of Shittiness whilst also reminding me of an episode which uses the exact same premise but much better. With that said, ladies and gentlemen of the Mob, time to RiOT loose with a Fandom Arson of Sonic Boom Episode 17: Don't Judge Me. Belts Up, Gang! We're about to land.

Recap

1:26 And You will not believe how Eggman worms his way out of this one.

1:27-1:34 *Facepalm* Dude, you are a worse actor than Adam Sandler, I can't believe that I'd actually be willing to say that...

2:17-2:28 There are words to describe how wrong this is, but I'm going to save it for the conclusion.

3:26-3:38 I can't believe it, this is actually more biassed than the Trial in Sonichu No.10, Oh god, something surpassed Sonichu in Shittiness.

4:00-4:10 Instead we have Knux. And thus, yet another nail in the coffin of Sega.

5:30-5:38 *Facepalm* You know what this reminds me of, Bubsy the Bobcat. You know, that Mascot that went nowhere designed by a video game dev that went nowhere. Yeah, he's the guy that appeared in progressively worse games, handled terribly in all of them, and he could never shut up no matter how much we all despised him. And thinking about Sonic after the genesis days, Barring a few rises in quality like the Dreamcast Trilogy post Sonic Adventure and the Hedgehog Engine Games like Unleashed, Colors and Generations... he's appeared in progressively worse games, handled terribly in almost all of them, and he never shuts the hell up! So we've got Bubsy ripping off Sonic only for Sonic to Rip off Bubsy. Market Research Inbreeding: Its where integrity and consistency go to die!

6:30-6:44 Hence why Eggman probably hired him for a lot of his politican-buying money.

6:55-7:09 Meh, I've seen better.

8:16 Careful Knux, you're testing Sonic's Patience and if you cause what I think you're gonna cause, I'm going to pull out a video to show fans what you're supposed to be!

8:16-8:32 Ugh, Go watch Knux's Episode in DiGi's Character Analysis 'Who Dat?' and leave comments as to how terrible his decay as a character has gotten over the duration of this god-forsaken franchise!

8:42-8:46 Eat a Dick Orbot.

10:56-10:58 Took the words out of my mouth CC.

Conclusion

Horrible Mistakes

For this one, I have to dig deep into the archives. Like, 'Earliest Arson Ever Produced' Deep. That's right, the similar episode we're talking about here is 'Krabs vs. Plankton' from the First show we ever aimed our scythe towards: SpongeBob Squarepants.

Our First Drop of evidence comes in with the crashing of the mothbot. In there, Plankton was taking the idea of being in pain (or pretending to), because he heard a customer saying he would sue Mr. Krabs, which gave him the idea of doing so to get the Krabby Patty Secret Formula. Why? Because Plankton slipped on the Wet Floor without any sight of a wet floor sign. The ironic thing is that when Mr. Krabs hired a lawyer being prepared for the trial, the lawyer slipped on the wet floor and actually got himself hurt. "WHOOPS!" Here, Eggman had no reason to fake the injury (shows Eggman in a neck brace) other than to make himself look like an idiot.

At least with KvP, He was too damn small for anybody to see right away, hence why Plankton

{Plankton: [whispering] I'll give you one last chance. I'll drop the charges if you give me the formula.

Mr. Krabs: [yelling] Never, you little runt! [The court audience gasps]

Plankton: [dramatically] Oww, oww! My wittle arm! [audience gasps]

Mr. Krabs: What? No. I didn't lay a claw on him.

Plankton: Oww! My other arm! [audience gasps]

Mr. Krabs: He's lying! Bah!}

However, Mr. Krabs has to go along with the case, because he has to defend himself until there's evidence.

"Don't Judge Me", on the other hand, had nothing to believe to the crowd that Sonic is harming Eggman by accident. It would've been funny if Sonic had a restraining order and cops attacked him, like in the Cartoon Network Shortie: HarrassCat (0:45 - 1:00) But NO, Bill wanted to make a boring court case.

Now compare the 'Evidence' from Don't Judge Me to the evidence from KvP, Sheldon brings in a visualized piece of evidence to prove his point.

Plankton: [presents a "wet floor" sign to Mr. Krabs] Mr. Krabs, can you identify this item?

Mr. Krabs: It's a "wet floor" sign.

Plankton: Do you own one?

Mr. Krabs: Uhh...well...umm...No, I don't. [everyone gasps] No, no! You don't understand! I had to make some tough business decisions and the sign seemed so superfluous?

Court Audience: Guilty. Guilty, guilty, guilty.

Plankton: No more questions.

With Sonic Boom's "Don't Judge Me", there's nothing to prove whether Sonic is Guilty or not! Hell, MatPat of Game Theory, even with all the hits and misses he often makes throughout his career, thought he was bad at doing his job... but at least from the start, he had some visuals to prove his point! And he just made a video about how Night Howlers were connected to Drugs! When you make MatPat look like the better presentator, you that something is wrong.

But the final comparison comes with how the heroes handle the situation. At least with Krabs VS. Plankton, the Krabby Patty Formula gave into Plankton's temptation of greed, lust, and gluttony. Heck, even the most famous of Court Cases, King Kong VS. Donkey Kong, had Nintendo as the Defendant and Universal as the Plaintaff; yet Universal lost, because they were in the wrong! Sonic Boom failed miserably because they don't care about Sonic's side of the story, and there was no Plot MacGuffin in the series for them to u- OH WAIT A MINUTE! YOU JUST MADE THE CHAOS CRYSTALS IN RISE OF LYRIC!!!! WHY DIDN'T YOU MAKE EGGMAN REALIZE HOW POWERFUL THEY ARE, OR MAKE SONIC AND HIS FRIENDS THE NEW GUARDIANS?!? And no, I'm not going to bother with the rest of episode anymore, because... {ISNT IT ALL POINTLESS}

Final Words

And that's only the comparison to one episode, think about Sonic Heroes and how much better it was with characterization, think about A Truman Scorned and how the solution was more creative than just 'Roboviolence', Think about JBX and how at least the lunacy of having Simon the Digger on the Director's Chair led to something interesting. Think about, yes, Freiberger's own Drawn Together and how it was at least more energetic in its shittiness. It's clearly one of, if not the worst Sonic Boom Episode we've reviewed thus far. You want to know why this episode deserves a good thrashing? My coworker, Robbie Walker, wasted his time on it, during the Men's Retreat in 2015, when he should've been focusing on God. He felt that because he was going to miss it at home, he should try showing it to the guys in the at gathering. After watching it by the time Eggman faked his injury, Robbie could not take it, but had to sit through it THE WHOLE... DAMN... EPISODE!!! It's as worse as Late Fees.

So the Dino Posse's turning this wild ride around with two terrible episodes from the Boom Catalogue. Will this keep their footprint on the Top Three after two of the good ones ganged up on 'em these past couple of weeks, tune in next week, Same Smash Time, Same Smash Channel, Back to you, Freeza.

Freeza: Zarbon, didn't your nephew fake an ailment to sue the school board for feeding him stuff he didn't like and didn't I come over to blow the entire school to smetherines for its trouble?

Zarbon: Ah! Yeeesss... (Sobbing)

Freeza: Still Ahead, The Glitter Force and their Precure comrades in Japan, we'll tell you how stupid the 'Glitter Force' name is after this.

Top 10 Reasons to Stuff Kingdom Hearts into Homestuck

Ditch Doze

(A3I Part 1)

What kind of person can say slowing down time for yourself is awesome power with a straight face? Think about it, think about it, Exactly! Hence why we need to swap out Doze with a new guy with a new power like, say preserving your existence when your past self has been killed off.

(Science Man explain the Terminator Timeline)

Maybe by this replacement touching future stuff with it's body, they won't get erased when the timeline edits itself upon its past self gets removed from its post. I dunno, just get rid of Doze

(A3I Clip)

Retcon Trolls

(Clip of the Trolls being the Trolls)

The trolls are one of the best alien creatures ever to be blessed with the gift of intelligent life. Taking Internet troll archetypes and molding an ecclesiastical cast of dynamic characters is no easy task especially when plenty of them have traits that make them outright unlikeable, Andrew Hussie should be commended for his efforts even though only three out of twelve remained alive to the end.

(Insert Troll getting Killed)

A solution would be to use Die's Voodoo Doll to warp themselves to a timeline where all the Trolls made it out okay akin to how the Felt bounced back from being dead in the fifth intermission of Act 6. We have the Technology

(More Troll Things)

Artificial Identities

(Young Xehanort)

Let's not fool ourselves, most of the original characters are absolutely wooden, Xehanort is right about Light and Darkness needing to co-exist in perfect balance, the conflict is racist and outright meaningless, and the mystery aspect that ties it all together is absolute bullshit.

(Demyx's Death)

How do you negate a convoluted mess that has stuffed time travel into in an effort to remain relevant, you completely negate its existence by saying the events and characters are digital ingredient to create a cosmic eraser for Lord English and thus, they don't really exist or even matter.

(Family Guy Reference)

Retconning the Kingdom Hearts Mythos to being mere fiction means that the Kingdom Hearts cast can be reborn when the Homestuck cast recreates the universe, the shallow personalities of 70% of the cast make a lot more sense, and the Heartless, Nobodies, Unversed and Dream Eaters are reduced to a singular category of Monst-no, Puppets, because that's what they're programmed to be: Grind Fodder.

(Level Grinding in Kingdom Hearts)

Sometimes we need a clean slate.

(Xemnas speaking)

Character Prototyping

A Victory for the Midnight Crew

(0:00 - 0:47 A3I Part 1)

I just love it when the politics of mobster rivalries come into play, especially when we get allies as glovely as the Midnight Crew. Having asserted themselves in the Intermission between Acts 3 and 4, they've become as well known as the iconic Trolls but with a less prominent fanbase.

(4:02 - 5:25 A3I Part 1)

Spades Slick has obviously been through too much just to be tossed aside like that in Collide, didn't he promise to take down english himself, and speaking of 'ol English.

(3:15-3:33 A3I-Part 4)

The Fall of English

(0:00-0:10 Paradox Space: Horse Play)

Another one of the things I find dissatisfaction with was the uncertain outcome of Lord English, like we get a peek at the utopia they build, but it stops without even bringing up Lord English's fate. Personally, I've thought up the perfect way to kill him off, Erase Caliborn from existance ala Doris from Meet the Robinsons.

(That Scene)

Severely weakened by the erasure of his past self but preserved via having Biscuits stuff himself and the rest of the Felt Clan into his oven, Lord English is now able to be finally killed off, and you can bet your britches that Spades Slick will be taking this opportunity to its logical limit with the cherry on top being what he plans for his Corpse, I'll show you a visualization of what will happen but Now is the time to ask: How the faiz is this gonna work?

(2:50-3:20 A3I Part 4)

Callie Ohpeee

Fin traces the future path of Vriska

Guilt Tripping

Bedroom

DeeP DiSH: Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, time to riot loose, with a Fandom Arson of Sonic Boom Season 1 episode 9... Guilt Tripping. Belts up Gang, we're about to Land.

DeeP DiSH: Well, Sonic HAS been losing his touch since Sonic Heroes gaves us bad pinball Physics.

DeeP DiSH: So you remember this guy here? He is the Gogoba Chief. We recognize him from the hours of sleep you had from watching Late Fees, but here in his debut episode, he's a main player in a plot that linked it to another show that did something quite similar but failed miserably: Adventure Time's the Silent King.

DeeP DiSH: Yes, we're litterally putting Sonic on the Backburner for something that was, for Robbie the Writer, a very long time coming.

DeeP DiSH: Says the guy who's scared of Vampires, was a thief at one point, and originally doesn't want Finn to be with Flame Princess.

DeeP DiSH: Marketing Overhype at its fuckest folks.

DeeP DiSH: You know what, we're going to save this scene for the conclusion. It's clearly something that will bite this series in the ass later.

{THiN CRUST and DeeP DiSH looked a bit displeased}

DeeP DiSH: There isn't a scene where the Gogobas regurgitate Sonic's Food, right?

DeeP DiSH: Thank God, then he'd face the risk of Goblin AIDS, Goblin AIDS makes your Teeth Go Gray.

DeeP DiSH: What Adventure Time did here just doesn't make any sense and to explain why it's outright nonsensical: We have Dr. Carrot Carrington: Adventure Historian and Bonne Certified Carrotologist. Dr. C: In the Medival Era of history, Kings would often go into battle to prove their bravery and courage. What they are doing by restricting Finn from even giving out a speech is enforcing cowardice, which is frowned upon in circles of nobility. DeeP DiSH: Geez, No wonder the Goblin Kingdom was frowned upon. They're making Glass Joe from Punch Out more braver than those guys.

DeeP DiSH: If you were the king in this type of situation, please do not turn around because if you did, you would see the establishment plotting out the next eight years of eroding rights and human extermination up to and including president trump nuking the earth into nonexistence with World War III.

DeeP DiSH: Can't believe I'm saying this but THANK NEPTUNE FOR THE 'STATUS QUO IS GOD' TROPE!

DeeP DiSH: I honestly did not know that it Nimh was a book.

DeeP DiSH: And it's all because Sega's marketing politics flushed Stephen Frost out the door.

DeeP DiSH: Considering how bad Sega's Marketing over Storytelling Mentality has been following Sonic's Inception, it's all the more depressing that it's obvious Sega's never going to learn.

DeeP DiSH: Why do you have to correct them? Isn't this kinda pointless?

DeeP DiSH: I'm sorry, but I have to agree with Roger on that one; it's dumb, pathetic, and downright sad for any Sonic Fan forced to see his homebase wither away like this.

DeeP DiSH: Why do you think these guys are good manipulators again, you ask? And why is the Chief's crown not falling off of his head?

DeeP DiSH: You're telling me, Sam Sheepdog and Ralph Wolf don't do weird stuff like that, unless it's a lunch break.

DeeP DiSH: Wait until they get back home.

DeeP DiSH: Gotta love that karma folks. One minute you're riding high as one of the few good things on the Fox Box, the next you're being filed for Tax Deductions in an act of Tax Fraud.

WTF is Care Bear Stars

DeeP DiSH: (taps the remote to cue three quotes) To review a fan-based passion project that was decimated by Corporate Brass before it was even able to see is often among the most depressing things to review, granted despite being the best job you can ever have, it ain't always easy. But every time I point out that some dude tried to make a magical girl show based around the Care Bears, It gives me a little bit of determination that any idea can work out in the end. But when I point out that its original creator was pushed out of Youtube upon the appearance of a Cease and Desist order, I die a Little Inside. The fact that this Joshua Click made the Care Bears intentionally Badass gives me the will to live every time I stumble across this show! So, Let's get to it, Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, Time to Riot Loose with a Fandom Arson of Care Bear Stars, The little Spin Off that should have been... Belts Up, Gang. We're about to land!

Spider-Man Homecoming or The Emoji Movie

DeeP DiSH: It's been said by many critics that animated projects tend to be better and smarter when they keep a solid head on their shoulders on what they're supposed to be geared towards, but to engage in the superficial trapping of the millennial definition of maturity is to damage your artistic vision. Just look at the Legend of Korra for example:

How the world showcased within evolves and changes with its four rows of thirteen episodes is considered bold and brash with each of its designated Villains being more three-dimensional in their political beliefs than Ozai from Last Airbender, showing true maturity in its writing. But in terms of how Bryke ends up going too far with this,

DeeP DiSH: Can anyone tell me why main character Korra belongs in the trash?

-E;R-

DeeP DiSH: Very good, Class. Now keep an eye out for a little detail on the problem with modern cinema as it concerns the producers of a particular film. Mainly Spider-Man Homecoming as I pit it against the Emoji Movie which, by the Time I post it, I have gone to see.

Both films released this year in 2017, both films released by Sony and both films are emblematic of the shortcomings of each creative talent driving those projects. But which is worse off and which is worth seeing?

DeeP DiSH: This is a Question I see as being worth asking and It's way past time I did something about it. Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob Time to RiOT loose with a Fandom Arson to see which is worse. The Emoji Movie or Spider-Man Homecoming

First thing to notice with our friendly neighborhood Marvel Flick is that it doesn't exactly feel like a Marvel Movie nor does Peter Parker actually feel like Peter Parker. In fact, this is literally just one of those cheap Disney Channel Sitcoms in disguise all the way down to the diverse casting for the sake of nothing else but the sake of diversity, the main character being the mandatory goofy kid that's in every damn one of these, and once you hear all that neutered millenial garbage that passes as humor, you'll cherish Michael Keaton's Vulture as much as you can cause that's all the good you're gonna get out of this cash grab.

-Marvel-

DeeP DiSH: The MCU is a business venture first and ongoing story second. Which makes it very sad that those indoctrinated on this stuff will end up as the next batch of Marketing Executives designed to ruin every drop of entertainment they touch... Ugh...

Cut to the Emoji Movie and you know exactly what you're getting: Inside Out with Wreck-it Ralph's coat of digital paint. We have a standard finding one's self journey that gives me flashbacks to Smurfette's arc in the Lost Village, and the odds are stacked against it by fans, critics and even staffers heralding it as the death knell for Sony Animation as we know it today. Hell, they even cancelled Popeye for this train wreck in the making! There were ways for it to be salvaged, You could call it: 'Phoned In' and it would be less blatant in its marketing and more catchy like with Ghostbusters '86 and more fitting with the cheap, dim humor the writers have 'Phoned in'

DeeP DiSH: But it's too late to change the outcome of a film destined to make back its budget of 55 million dollars, I am merely a bee buzzing against a failing corporate juggernaut.

Switch back to Homecoming and the Pathetic Spiderboy we've got is a little punk who's not interested in being Spiderman in the slightest, he just wants to be an Avenger. He stumbles in everything he does, he doesn't science all that good, he's an irresponsible prick who keeps bugging people about what to do and his supporting cast only makes matters worse. Michelle Obama is a pale imitation of the genuine MJ, -Character- was so inconsequential I labeled him as character in the initial script, Returning Avengers like Steve Rogers or Tony Stark are doing their best with what little they have and Flash is a straw Paul Joseph Watson willing to cut anyone down for no reason other than the Liberal Nazis in charge of Hollywood hate Paul Joseph Watson.

DeeP DiSH: Imagine my shock when I watched these young teenagers acting like young toddlers in a young grade-school type scenario. Modern College culture in a nutshell, let us move on to Phoned in.

This is Gene, as you can see, he's an Emoji. A meh, to be more precise. He's somehow able to showcase all the emotions, but the rest of the yellow-faced Emojis bully him into believing himself to be defective. Insert similarities to Globalization, White Genocide and Population Replacement here.

DeeP DiSH: We Luv ah salami, we luv ah muzzles, oh dey so good, oh dey so sweet!

He is accompanied by Hi-Five played by James Corden who is so bland and uninteresting I know a guy who legitimately called him James Comey, not that one. Pound Symbol Drain the Swamp. The only relatively interesting character is Jailbreak who's supposed to be the stand in for those kinda folks who hack their phones, she's the forced love intrest what with the Wyldstyle Vibes I'm getting from her. Alex seems like a good dude to put in the role of Riley, Bonnie and Andy before him.

DeeP DiSH: Note to self, in honor of Kingdom Hearts being canon in Toy Story, get Andy and Bonnie Looping.

When we get to our villain, Maya Rudolph as Smiler, she seems to have this creepy menace of being attached to her 'main emotion' and she's more or less the Merkel Model, would've been the Hillary Model, but we showed her!

-Screaming-

DeeP DiSH: And Patrick Stewart... way to piss away all that goodwill from Logan, man. Last great superhero movie and ya piss it away, why you do dat, man. Ya broke my heart!

Move on to the uniqueness of the setting and we have the same gentrified New York Skylines we've been getting sick of these past few years, except now we're stuck on the street level of Queens for most of the movie in a goddamn standard setting of a Disney Sitcom.

DeeP DiSH: Has PhantomStrider made his point clear about old Uncle Walt being disgusted with how safe they're playing Marvel these days, Hollywood's more or less Nazi Germany right now so is it any wonder we're stocking up on JPop trash?

Cut to Phoned in's concept and world and it is anything but! A world inside your cell phone opens a bunch of opportunities for stories that will immediately date themselves the minute a change happens to any of the Apps involved, YouTube, Snapchat, InfoWars, name an App and a corresponding world will be as designable as a Channel-tan. And the Animation, they really nailed the design and animation of human characters here, really pulling their A-Game for your Andy and Bonnie scene, your Riley comes home scene, your use time warp for recycling scene!

DeeP DiSH: A lot of effort went into this movie's look and feel for the first original feature of Sony Animation's Christine Bellstin era. But how does it stack up with the rest of our offering from:

Regular Customer

Y'all know the order, Goosebumps and hopefully its sequel are the Top Dog round these parts with Smurfs: The Lost Village isn't too far behind but not too high above Amazing Spiderman 2. Pixels barely scrapes by with Honesty towards itself as a cheap Adam Sandler comedy just like Ghostbusters: Answer the Call which doesn't have such virtue... Just like the Disney Channel Cinematic Sitcom the Pathetic Spider-Twerp which is only better than Answer the Call in terms of its villain but is dragged below Answer the Call by its pathetic cast that's worse than the new SJW team in Answer the Call and more annoying in their mannerisms. If there's one edge I can give to Answer the Call, at least its no longer the worst Movie on the list. This leaves Phoned in to take the Second Place Prize from Smurfs: the Lost Village on account on being a higher dose of originality!

DeeP DiSH: Red-Pilled audiences have really skyrocketed in the past year and a half, knocking away the Globalist cult of death and their tumblr puppets. The failure of Homecoming was phase one, Phase Two is why we need you to go see the Emoji Movie, for Phase Three to kick right in.

For those of you who have been keeping up with me throughout the past two months, I have been reading snippits from the Infinite Loops series. This is all to spread the word of this writing exercise and hopefully sell a movie out of it! HitchHiker's Guide to Infinity, Anyone?

DeeP DiSH: But that's a fantasy for another time. For right now, it's time to wave farewell to fallen press secretary Sean Spicer

Oompa Loompa, Doopity-Doo

I can has extra puzzle for you

Oompa Loompa, Derpity-Dee

If you are wise, you'll listen to me

What is it with puppeteering our fate

on the pay of the collapsing deep state

Why are you killing and eating our kids

God knows what, how, and why you did

You're all masks of Satan

Oompa Loompa, Dopety-Dar

If you are gen'rous you will go far.

You would live in happiness, too.

Like the Oompa Loompa, Doopity-Doo

The Lorax Fandom and You

In the far edge of 2012 where the prickle grass grows and the corporate brass smells slow so sour as it goes and no good ideas fly except those scraped by internet crows layth the street of the lifting Comcast corporation. Adapting the works of Dr. Seuss into fine-tuned family pictures has a lot of elements that could go haywire with the drop of a hat. For every Jim Carrey cast as a 'Grinch', there was a Mike Myers Vehicle waiting to Crash and Bernstein.

Now keep in mind that most of this garbage actually happened, this is literally how Tumblr reacted to an unoriginal piece of animated shlock complete with annoying minion backwash. I have never felt more frightened of or dissapointed in you.

Step One: Watching the Movie

If you're going to consider yourself a fan of something, you're going to have to witness it for yourself to see what the hell the internet sees in this goddamn beanpole. How bad could this movie possibly be?

Skit

Step Two: Count the Characters one, two and three

Take a look at how little characters there are. We've got the Lorax, Onceler, And critters yes. But the characters beyond the Truffula Woods don't get a scent of screentime beyond the freakin' Onceler clan. And they're fucking terrible characters in their own right. At least an askblog or two can flesh out Audrey as a character beyond the bland piece of Who Ass she was in the film. Comcast just made the fatal mistake of not even giving Oncie anyone attractive enough, relevant enough, in-his-timeline enough or not-related-to-him for a stable ship. Who the hell are you going to ship him with, himself?! You already did that, didn't you.

Skit

Step 3: The Askblog Cometh

Vest Oncelers, Suit Oncelers (or greedlers if you want to forsake subtlety), Robot Oncelers, Pimp Oncelers, Old Oncelers. Young Oncelers! Hell, Even the Onceler from the 1972 animated special has an askblog! What could make you stand out from the nonsense that is Money on Wheels? I saw Ted kissing a box of Empty-Os that one time.

Skit

Step 4: Camp --

Step 5: Thneedville High

Step 6: Principle of Business

Step 7: The Truffula Flu

Step 8: Deoncelerization

At this point, you realized that The Lorax was utter garbage. So now you do the sensable thing and scrub any and all scent of Comcast's recent stink from your cast of characters so you can save them for a more copyright-friendly venture.

Skit

Epilogue

And with that, you have officially survived the mess that is the Lorax Fandom. Go forth and tinker with your newly rebranded cast of characters.

Oncest

Logo

Commercial: Banned Cheetos Commercial

DeeP DiSH: Oh Internet! Breakfast is on the way.

(Meanwhile)

Pumpkinator: Viacom CEO Philipe Dauman, Seven Seconds remain until the time comes for your weekly beating.

Phillipe Dauman: Is that you, Pumpkinator?

(Begins transmitting tonight's episode into his brain, causing his head to explode)

Pumpkinator: Ha! Ha! Ha! See you next thursday!

(Flies off)

Intro

DeeP DiSH: Well, Folks. I have some good news and some bad news, bad news is, despite being an overwhelming success, merging two worlds together has reduced the cosby comet and all the inconsequential background troops within it, myself included to mere atoms on the molecule. Good News Is I managed to synchronized my consciousness into another DeeP DiSH unit, thanks for keeping her toasty, Nanna DeeP DiSH!

Nanna DeeP DiSH: Keep up the Good Work, Bud!

DeeP DiSH: Anyway. On to the Review.

Recap

Lorax: The Following Transmission contains ideas you might find psychologically dangerous, observe with caution and please, do not try this malarkey at home.

(A finger aims for Onceler's crotch)

Lorax: No Really, Don't.

To be honest, I'm a little scared that this might act as a shot in the arm for this Fandom because whatever I say might inspire them to do more fanart of this tripe, I'm taking the risk just to see how completely ridiculous it is and how much a fandom can scrape the bottom of the barrel.

okay, context. Lorax is just... forgettable. There is no substance to this story, they try to give it substance what with the framing device of the book being bloated into a dystopia of commercialism which the companies merchandising the smeg out of it apparently failed to notice. The only relatively decent thing about this movie was the cult following of this gangly green noodle of a character.

---

And believe it or not, there was a version of this clown as the cat in the hat! Why the fuck is there a Cat in the Hat Onceler.

---

There was also this process of 'deoncelerization' where you change the oncelersonas into new, original characters. And believe it or not. The big names of this meme started this trend, probably the fandom realizing that the movie was utter garbage and are now re-habilitating their characters into more copyright friendly forms. They seem to be getting the right Idea.

I kept digging to interesting ask blogs, even going as far as to check the Internet Archive to see if those blogs were preserved because this Fandom just, well... It vanished.

---

I'll see you clods next week when '4-once' is a fucking meme.

Rainy Day (My Bed Bugs)

<Don't Hug Me I'm Scared>

(Tony the Talking Clock is laying in bed, Paige the Sketchbook and Geoffrey the Globe are looking down upon themselves, Colin is Sleeping)

Tony: What are we going to do? We're down to our last student.

Paige: I'm sure we'll get the others back, We've been through our share of scrapes.

Geoffrey: You paid the ransom to save Paige and the students! You managed to keep it together when laptop was out for repairs, and don't get me started on your 'thing' with Strignold.

Tony: That was before Manny Escaped, before Brendon showed up, before Crowley- Dear God...

Paige: Hey, DeeP DiSH came back to see us, maybe he can help!

Tony: That's... precisely the main distraction I have at the moment.

Paige: And why's that, Tony?

Tony: (Sits Up) Because for someone to have returned, they need to have left first...

Paige: And?

Tony: He never left.

Paige: oh...

(Beat)

Geoffrey: Well, at least it can't get any worse!

D: What's your Favorite Idea?

Mine is Being Critical

P: How do you get the idea?

D: I Just try to think Critically!

So take a look at this shlong!

Tell me, please, What do you see?

P: It's just generic ol' garbage.

D: Maybe to you, but not to me!

I see a shitty movie!

Breaking the rules of movie chains

P: I don't see what you mean...

D: Cause you're not thinking critically!

D: Now get a load of my shades!

I wear the shades to express myself!

T: That sounds very boring.

I wear the shades to express myself!

Tony: Alright, Alright, Stop the Music, we get it already! You're reviewing this thing for your show

-Thesis-

Recap

The Episode begins with Toofy and Gooby talking about the joke they intend on pulling on Woozy, but J. Edgar

#41: "Video Game References" (Teen Titans Go!)

THiN CRUST: I'm pretty sure you remember our rebuttle of Sonic Boom from the previous Arson... (shows clip from the previous clip.) Well, that's because... I hate bad reboots. "The Looney Tunes Show", "Sailor Moon Crystal", "Sonic X", "Teen Titans Go", "Yo Yogi", "Quack Pack", "New 52", "the Amazing Spider-Man". Heck, Not even Disney's Innocent in this trade, from Maleficent to The Jungle Book to the concept of the freaking Underland, they're under the delusion that they can recreate the Marvel Cinematic Universe out of their animated classics. You better hope to christ that the Night on Bald Mountain movie is your Avengers, Disney or so help me, I'll be praying for the devil himself, Churnabog, to eradicate every last one of those shit reboots. Especially the shitstains Viacom's left on the carpet for us to clean up from J.J. Abrams dissatisfaction with Star Trek to the acquisition of the Ninja Turtles building up to a Michael Bay Movie and a new cartoon that acts like Teen Titans but- (Clip of DonnieXApril) Yeah, we'll be tearing that show apart some day soon.

DeeP DiSH: But by far, the biggest offense is that a man who thinks that cartoons are stupid is given the keys to a comedy-oriented re-interpetation of a 2000s DC Classic: Teen Titans Go! And their hasty writing, cheap animation, and overall immature nature towards its periferary demographic who grew up with the Titans just goes to show why the DC Universe these days ain't giving us nice things... Like Action Cartoons. Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, Time to RiOT loose with a Fandom Arson of Teen Titans Go! Episode --: "Video Game References" Belts up, Gang! We've gotta get acquainted with our latest regular customer.

#42: Super Smash Bros.

Once upon a time, there was a boy by the name of Artemis Haze, he had a wide collection of Nintendo toys.

#43: Gadget 2.0. (Inspector Gadget 2015)

#44: Hose Water (Teen Titans Go!)

THiN CRUST: I'm pretty sure you remember our rebuttle of Sonic Boom from the previous Arson... (shows clip from the previous clip.) Well, that's because... I hate bad reboots. "The Looney Tunes Show", "Sailor Moon Crystal", "Sonic X", "Teen Titans Go", "Yo Yogi", "Quack Pack", "New 52", "the Amazing Spider-Man". Heck, Not even Disney's Innocent in this trade, from Maleficent to The Jungle Book to the concept of the freaking Underland, they're under the delusion that they can recreate the Marvel Cinematic Universe out of their animated classics. You better hope to christ that the Night on Bald Mountain movie is your Avengers, Disney or so help me, I'll be praying for the devil himself, Churnabog, to eradicate every last one of those shit reboots. Especially the shitstains Viacom's left on the carpet for us to clean up from J.J. Abrams dissatisfaction with Star Trek to the acquisition of the Ninja Turtles building up to a Michael Bay Movie and a new cartoon that acts like Teen Titans but- (Clip of DonnieXApril) Yeah, we'll be tearing that show apart some day soon.

DeeP DiSH: But by far, the biggest offense is that a man who thinks that cartoons are stupid is given the keys to a comedy-oriented re-interpetation of a 2000s DC Classic: Teen Titans Go! And their hasty writing, cheap animation, and overall immature nature towards its periferary demographic who grew up with the Titans just goes to show why the DC Universe these days ain't giving us nice things... Like Action Cartoons. Ladies and Gentlemen of the Mob, Time to RiOT loose with a Fandom Arson of Teen Titans Go! Episode --: "Hose Water" Belts up, Gang! We've gotta get acquainted with our latest regular customer.

#46: Robopeck (Back at the Barnyard)

#47: Jimmy Timmy Power Hour (FOP)

Well, if it isn't the Fairly OddParents Equivilent to Atlantis Squarepantis.

#48: Disney Infinity 2.0.

Part 1: The Toy Box and its Games

Disney Infinity 2.0. been in circulation for nearly a year now, which means it's time for our midseason tradition of dissecting the world of the Toy Box and its new offerings. We've nailed together... or rather, I've nailed together a format for these specific reviews. We'll be starting with the Toy Box this time around and all the New Toys it has to offer. Well, for starters, there are new road pieces, new blocks, new skydome-and-terrain combos, and new Non-Existance for the Toy Vault, Replaced with a fancy Toy Store because lets not fool ourselves. (Nostalgia Critic: I *Bleep* Hate Biodome) Though, granted, These Baby steps are to be expected, I do hope there's room for improvement in 3.0. just as there is for the new INteriors function from this particular version. What the Nuts, A separate Folder?! (BLEEP) Dat Noise, I'm goin' to Grizzlebees!

Well at least the Creativitoys are still operational indoors. And they've gotten themselves an upgrade.

-Assault on Asgaurd-

-Escape from the Kylm-

-Stitch's Tropical Rescue-

-Brave Forest Siege-

Part 2: Playsets

-Avengers Playset-

-Spiderman Playset-

-Gaurdians of the Galaxy Playset-

-Toy Box Exclusive Characters-

-Theoretical Big Hero 6 Playset-

-Theoretical Wreck-It Ralph Playset-

-Theoretical Toy Story that Time Forgot-

Part 3: An Open Letter to John Vignocchi

Hey, John. It's Alex. I decided to write this open letter to you and the rest of The Walt Disney Company as a loud cry to see if you'd be willing to lend an ear to our cause. Precisely one year ago, We explained why and How Disney Infinity can be used to tell a heartwarming story using the Don Bluth Principle of 'Kids can take Just about Anything as long as it has a happy ending.' while taking it to its logical conclusion. Its now one year on and you're ready to roll out the final major brand Disney has in its Arsenal of IP, Ready to move onto producing the next chapter. To be honest, one of your hosting First Party Companies, Nintendo, they're in talks to begin a new chapter themselves. And their definition of 'the next chapter' is anything but 'more of the same' unlike most companies. Because let's face it, there are more people in the industry that care more about selling toys than telling stories, but Nintendo is a company that's been there and done that longer than Uncle Walt has been alive. Think about that for a second. Nintendo has existed longer that Walter Elias Disney, let alone the concept of Video Games.

Nintendo's actually more like Disney than the actual company. The irony is... Nintendo was generations ahead of them. See, Each Generation of Disney ages like wine. It has a pretty stellar taste at first, but when it ultimately turns sour towards the end with horrible Idea after horrible Idea, It's safe to say it's time to swap out the head honcho in favor of a new kid on the block. We've seen it with Michael Eisner's Direct-To-Video Sequel Shenanagans. And as much as we don't like to admit it, the live action re-imaginings of Already Iconic Disney Classics. That's Mister Iger's cue to get out and make room for a new bossman. Let's hope Tom Staggs or whoever else might be capable of filling Rob's shoes because if you don't pull yourself together, You might just fade into the ether like you almost did with Cinderella. I don't want that to happen, you own Marvel, You own Star Wars, You own Mickey Mouse for god's sake! The bench you guys have is really fraggin' deep, and the fact that executives keep you away from fully taping into said deep bench and instead focusing more onto the new additions to the deep bench is really draining in the hope department if you catch my drift.

The Fact is that Nintendo is older than any American entertainment company, There's you guys, but then there's Warner Bros., Viacom, Screen Gems, Sony, Even Universal Believe it or not. Nintendo is the only company in the business of entertainment to have originated in the 1800s, try wrapping your head around that. and it's because of that sense of longevity that the Boss has pretty much decided to go 'Nintendotarian' and thus is only willing to play Nintendo Games and buy Nintendo Things and nothing else, he's even sworn off American movies entirely. because you followed the routine. You imitate, because you're afraid to innovate. Hell, Even Skylanders Innovates. You cobble together penis-envy explosions into a 90 minute toy commercial and you call it a feature film. Allowing Ariel to outlive the heroine of the original story by Hans Christen Anderson, Toys. Ignoring things such as natural character development in favor of aforementioned penis envy explosions, Toys. Ripping Off FoodFight and puking video games into it, Toys. The Paint-By-Numbers Plot of the Haunted Mansion Movie, Toys. The Cars Franchise Existing, Toys. Live-Action Re-Interpetations, Toys. Film Studios Act like Toy Companies in an effort to push ticket sales and keep the roof over their heads, Disney Used to be the exception to this, Making Money to make the movies he wanted to make... But not anymore.

There's no more personal touches in movies these days, the whole system's run by a corporate mass of shareholders who think they know what demographics want, and time and again with the backlash with 'Teen Titans Go!' 'Mr. Pickles' and 'Family Guy' and through the success of 'Gravity Falls', 'Steven Universe', 'My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic', and yes... Even the not one, but two massive multiplayer crossover franchises you have under your belt... The Customer has proved that it's always right and demographic charts are always wrong. It's not what they show on the outside with layers of special effects and, for lack of a better word, Pingas-Envy Explosions, but the memorable characters and the journey that these particular characters go through. Quality of Quantity, The Boss would often say. But you're pre-occupied these days with trying to top pigs with pigs and as a wiseman knew from experience, that's a bad idea if there ever was one. If Frozen 2's plot's as predictable as we've expected, You're probably going to learn the hard way. And with the world as our stage, the public will know how sour the company has gotten. Not because we despise this company, far from it, we want it to get better. (TOM: Criticism serves a healthy function, sometimes it can help you get better. That's because it comes from a good place.) People call out your shortcomings because we know for a fact that with the money you've got in your vault, you can do better. People rag on Time Warner because Disney needs viable competition because let's not fool ourselves, DreamWorks was never fit to be in the same ranks as you to begin with. We openly beat on Viacom... Because it does not deserve to exist. (Irwin: I have no Friends)

But the point of the matter is, There's a Way you can redeem yourselves, a way to use the Toy Box universe as the perfect tool for storytelling that it can potentially be. And I happen to have sent it to you guys already, by the time you watch this video. I conclude my message with the words of Another Wiseman, 'there's a storm coming in, you either evolve or perish'. It's your choice, guys. Because the Boss is more than happy to let you guys rot away into nothing like so many other companies out there. And It's not just for this very game, Its for the movies as well. I hear you're remaking the aformentioned Haunted Mansion Movie. It's a simple fix, really. You utalize the plot in the ride as a backstory and have the butler be a living decendant of the killer, Madame Leota. And for Maleficent 2, go balls to the wall and be creative with this character, prove to us that this Maleficent can at least be up to par with the Mistress of All Evil we've come to know and love. And in terms of keeping your animated classics relevant in the modern age, how about you just re-release them on Streaming Services so that when the corresponding Live Action Re-Interpetation fails to please, at least they can go back to it to watch again and again.

Because Like with this very game, Disney Infinity, The Possiblities are Endless. You guys are ready to roll out the third generation of the building blocks we have used to build our own adventures that you deem worthy of upholding the creativity of this company that has touched so many hearts, united so many families, created so many memories. To put it bluntly, Uncle Walt said this and said it well: 'If you can Dream it, You can Do it!' Again, I am praying that you look inside, and lord knows that plenty of fans are praying too, Remember the man who made you who you are, Because unlike the Boss, I still have hope for this deep bench of a conglomerate. After all, The success and fame you've garnered in the past, it was all brought to you by one man. One soul. One heart that acts as the drill to create the heavens, and as you always say, this entertainment company/heaven-creating drill started with a mouse.

#MF: ReBoot: The Guardian Code

Hypertime is No Joke. Every time loop has to be perfect. Every Looper mentally stable. But any hiccup in expansion, any relapse in sanity can be devastating.

With the Advent of the Guardian Code, ReBoot is on a Collision Course with the Infinite Loops, And it is up to you to archive as much as you can.

#50: Sonic Boom X (Re-Imaginating)

#60: Arc Rise Fantasia

THiN CRUST: This Season was a whirlwind of Suffering, I sat through two of the shittiest shows that are still on the air today, our weekly schedule was comprimised by our co-head writer being screwed over by a freak rainstorm, I was kidnapped by my old boss who's somehow an angel of darkness now, And my relationship with Mr DeeP DiSH has been through hell and back merely through the limitations of my computer. But if there's one thing we've got, it's a light at the end, something to congratulate us on a season well done.

DeeP DiSH: And the game I decided to pick for our final dive into the abyss? Arc Rise Fantasia,

#96: (Zixx) Phunkee Zee

DeeP DiSH: This is a Transmission to Zixx Phunkee Zee. If you can hear us, then I am about to tell you about the Infinite Loops. See, Yggdrasil has been damaged and I'm not allowed to divulge when, how and why, all I can say is that you're going to repeat your life time and time again. The second thing you'll notice is that it's not always going to be the same thing, there could be universe fusion, cooky variants, even a guest or two in your baseline. Three, there will be times where you visit a universe similar to our handy little Hub, the place where Admins archive the universes. For Example, Let me talk to you about a man by the name of Jeffrey Hirschfield.

Jeffrey Hirschfield was used to archive two specific universes that are dormant as of this recording, Yours as the taping hasn't made it obvious already, and an obscure Sci-Fi Show called Lexx. Produced by one half of dhx media, it features a spaceship and its crew searching far and wide for a new planet to call home or something, I guess it's worth an episode or two if you're in the mood for some Firefly.

DeeP DiSH: Right after its end in 2001 after four seasons, Hirschfield would be back at it again with a new show with a more child-friendly premise of an Alien Invasion and the kickass heroine working to dismantle it before things go further into the DeeP south. That's where you come in, Agent Zixx Phunkee Zee.

Released in 2004 for YTV up in its homeland of Canada, the show features CG Animation for the Inner Keep that you tend to traverse through with assistance from several earthlings you have encountered throughout its three distinct levels, all to destroy the alien conquerer Algoron and upend his various forces.

DeeP DiSH: And I am here to walk you through a episode number one. Belts up, madam. We're about to land.

We open on a curious old man rummaging for food when he gets assulted by Globalism!

(0:55-1:02) DeeP DiSH: Don't you realize that these zombified soldiers are unable to compromise or debate or anything intelligent?!

Hobo Mr Coreander gets cornered when help arrives in... well, you.

(1:38-1:45) DeeP DiSH: Impulsive, Much? Flannco, be thankful that you're probably going to end up Soul-Bound by the Loop's coding.

The two clansmen rush to the engine room and vert their molecules outta there!

(2:02-2:10) DeeP DiSH: Now comes the time to introduce the true star of the show: the Keep.

A transdimensional antimatter field engineered by the old Gaanth race that founded your happy little network, the Keep's atmosphere was archived by Elliott Digital using an obscure game engine named LithTech to create the animation, the first time a game engine was used exclusively for TV Animation. It's clunky, sure, the henshin sequence has certainly showed that to be true. But that clunkiness comes when engines are at the PS2 Level of rendering power. Future co-producers at Rainmaker would naturally use Unreal like the rest of us for the Upcoming Expansion to the Mainframe Loops ReBoot: The Guardian Code

DeeP DiSH: Which probably won't do too much damage to Yggdrasil

You make short work of the Harlok Goons and head back to fetch Hobo Coriander

(3:42-3:49) Well considering what he has in his Library, there might be some room for concern.

Of course he's safe, he promised to send a little something to a certain someone.

(4:00-4:13) DeeP DiSH: Kinda hard for me to trust you when you talk like Gollum.

You know him as Adam, I know him as another face on the list! His Mother is an Archeologist who has been absent from his life for a good two years and man, has he been worried sick about her.

(5:18-5:32) DeeP DiSH: The Indoctrinated Left's views on Alex Jones in a nutshell. Captain, I know why you fired me, so... Yeah, I'm... Looking at you.

(5:40-5:46) DeeP DiSH: The Indoctrinated Left's views on Patriotism and Free Speech in a nutshell. Yes, Google, I'm... Looking at You.

The Hargok Empire was naturally hot on his twelve-year-old tail and his best buddy Griff doesn't believe the poor boy in the slightest.

DeeP DiSH: My relationship with Jake Zaret- Ah, fuck it! Dude gets sent to the Shrink!

(7:42-7:50) DeeP DiSH: Name's on the same creep level, so it doesn't really matter.

Zixx overhears their conversation as Adam heads up to meet the obvious enemy.

(8:30-8:40) DeeP DiSH: Could be a bit brighter, though.

(8:55-9:04) DeeP DiSH: Or else you'll end up reviewing trash like the Emoji Movie or Kung-Fu Dino Posse.

One Breaking and Entering offense later, Adam dials up Griff to give chase after the offenders and you know where their trail leads.

(10:25-10:47) They enter the Keep in their spiffy new Ganth Armor and after fleeing from spiders, guess who finds them?

(11:33-11:42) DeeP DiSH: Hey, Adam should try his hand at Ping Pong at the Yggdrasil Olympics. Ooh, be sure not to get any little bugs in your teeth.

Zixx comes to the rescue when there's nowhere the two dweebs could run, and naturally slam the door from behind when they make their escape before parting ways and telling them to forget what they saw.

DeeP DiSH: I'd say that you could've used a Neuralizer had you had one handy, but considering the help they'll provide as volunteer backup at least for this season, that might have been your godsend.

Deeth covers his tracks like you probably would when you're caught red handed, so the only option left is to Metal Gear it till dusk and dig into the office... But the Principal catches them in the act by the time they realize the trail's iced the ride up, so they book it before they're charged for attempted vandalism

(16:20-16:28) DeeP DiSH: Love how you added the squeak of a turning valve for set up...

(16:28-16:38) for the ever-subtle payoff. Better luck next role, -Actor-

Announcer: The Preceeding Joke was brought to you by iMdB

Chorus: What you do instead of things.

So yeah, the two hide up in the keep and tinker with the inventory function of their suits to leave a trail for when you inevitably saved their asses a few more minutes into the episode.

(17:17-17:30) DeeP DiSH: One more step and the Dran's Feather in my inventory could have been a sour-scented Griph.

After they return from the Keep, they promptly steal a Map of the Keep from the boiler room like you do, only to be caught by Deeth and immediately indoctrinated on the Hargok empire's history.

(18:37-19:04) DeeP DiSH: Sensing a bit of Stockholm Syndrome on ya, Deeth. Has your Hargok Empire been North Korea'd into Communism and had to be put down by the Gaanth? Well, that's something for when you loop into the Network Academy.

Adam's gem from dear 'ol Mom turns out to be some Gaanth leftovers she found that the Hargok were more than happy to snag whilst dropping the two boys in the acid pit for you to drop in and rescue before the acid eats through the suits.

(20:20-20:36) DeeP DiSH: Oh! So you're intolerant to the vital Carbon Dioxide in our ecosystem, eh? Chalk one up for Al Gore, glad we're not listening to that ManBearPig.

Deeth goes after you, knowing too well the damage done to the fancy telecommunications systems when your ship crashed, resulting in you being cut off from the aformentioned Network.

DeeP DiSH: Fortunately there is such a thing as Volunteer Backup

(21:10-21:20, 21:23-21:40) DeeP DiSH: And the rest, as they say, is history.

And so have the Gaanth who have moved on and became Glowy and Shit, taking all their instruction manuals and tech with em, leaving only whatever's in the Keep.

All in all, they've done a relatively decent job breathing life into this particular footprint of your mission. Writing aludes to a hidden depth to the Hargok, but the animation's pretty clunky. Acting makes up for it somewhat, making it a relatively decent show to watch when you end up in the Hub.

DeeP DiSH: Well, that was fun. Guess I should go to the Yggdrasil Olympics and see how the coding of that universe is doing... Catch Y'all on the flipside, folks. Good Fight, Good Night and Stay Frosty.

-Outro-

DeeP DiSH: Another day, another dollop. Now to dive back into... the before times... (Looks to the sky to a glorious sight) Captain, you there?

THiN-CRUST: Hey, glad to see you on the Discord Server. So what's up, DeeP DiSH.

DeeP DiSH: I need you to get Joss and probably Jake on here, I know what we're gonna do next week.

#97: Super Smash Bros. Switch Wishlist

DeeP DiSH: Alright, dudes. Who's up for some major selling out?

THiN-CRUST: Given how little screen time I've been getting, how can I resist?

Virtuoso: Yeah, uh... Did you really hafta go through all the trouble of making this avatar for me?

THiN-CRUST: Hey, at least you're getting some screentime.

DeeP DiSH: Right, this should be enough to fill a video. Let's roll up our sleeves and drop dat

The Rundown

THiN-CRUST: Man, what a difference a year into a new console's life makes for a company corporate suits expected would pull out of the console business, am I right?

DeeP DiSH: Whether you like it or not, Nintendo is winning all the proverbial sports down here in the hub with its sensational Switch console with Breath of the Wild, Mario Odyssey and even a wide assortment of hand-me-downs from Gaming's Atlus Shug the Wii U helping the console sell like crazy.

THiN-CRUST: Let's all be frank here, we all knew it was only a matter of time before the devs pumped out the console's mandatory installment in the Super Smash Bros franchise... BUT THIS IS RIDICULOUS!

Virtuoso: So we came together to submit our five favorite fighters for the greatest crossover franchise on the planet.

THiN CRUST: For this list, we're going to submit five different fighters each round robin style. One guy suggests a new fighter and the other two comment on the proposed idea and see whether we're eager to accept it or not.

DeeP DiSH: There's going to be some rules in this household, One: No returning veterans are allowed which means you can go chuck Wolf, Snake and Ice Climbers out the window.

THiN-CRUST: Two, they have to have appeared on a Nintendo Console as a playable character, Cloud was a fluke, Cloud had his fans, not into how he got in, no Playstation JPop Cancer allowed, Square Enix.

DeeP DiSH: Rule Tres: No fighters that are owned by companies that aren't primarily known for video games, so schmos hoping for Batman, Shrek, or the Wayfinders are out of luck.

THiN-CRUST: Wait, why mention those twats over the face of the big twat's matinee franchise?

DeeP DiSH: Ah, that's where we get into the fourth and most famous rule: No fangame veterans.

THiN-CRUST: ...what?

DeeP DiSH: You heard me, if a candidate had already appeared on a fangame then they are disqualified for this list so, if Sonic, Mega-Man, Duck Hunt, Ryu or Cloud weren't blocked by rule number one being in place, then this rule definitely would be the final nail here as would be the violators of rule three: Inu-Yasha, Mister Incredible and Boruto's Dad from Smash Flash. Ichigo and Luffy from SSF2, Son Goku from both this and rival game Crusade, and finally: Deadpool, Scott Pilgrim and Ronald McDonald from the Brawl modding community.

Virtuoso: So we can't dust off Geno?

DeeP DiSH: He's in Crusade and Legacy XP so yeah, disqualified.

THiN-CRUST: And I guess that blocks Tails and Knuckles, too.

DeeP DiSH: Smash Flash with both making it into SSF2 and Project M respectively.

THiN-CRUST: At least the OC Trash Heaps are out of the question, too.

DeeP DiSH: And thank god for that.

Virtuoso: And Crono from Chrono Trigger.

DeeP DiSH: Yeah, and Lloyd Irving of Tales managed to end up in the sequel with Golden Sun's Isaac and Chibi-Robo.

THiN-CRUST: And Bomberman! Fowl temptress!

DeeP DiSH: And Crusade means we gotta say goodbye to Toad, Ridley, Krystal, Ashley, Porky and Gooey.

THiN-CRUST: Saki from Sin and Punishment, Pheonix Wright fro the Ace Attorney franchise, Rayman from Rayman, Christ, Crusade's even got Ristar!

Virtuoso: Andy's still fair game, right? From Advanced Wars?

DeeP DiSH: Yeah, but Sami just got her Project M moveset completed alongside Fire Emblem's Lyn.

(The Doctor arrives in his TARDIS)

Doctor: I hear you're disqualifying fighters from the Super Smash Bros. Underground, I have this modified Steve-O-Meter ready to see if the standard fangames thought of them already so send me a suggestion for a fighter and I'll run it through.

THiN-CRUST: Crash Bandicoot! His spiffy new N.Sane Trilogy Port means he can waltz into Smash.

Doctor: Yes, Just gotta give it a run-through... (The Steve-O-Meter buzzes with a glimpse of Crash in Crusade) Ah, he's thought of it!

Virtuoso: What about Shantae? She pops up in all these lists, why not have her turn up here?

Doctor: Yeah, let's pass her through the Steve-O-Meter and... (It rings and displays Shantae's character reveal on Crusade.) Ah, pity...

DeeP DiSH: Yikes, twelve disqualifications in a row, Crusade is a dick to Smash Bros. fighter wishlists.

Virtuoso: How do they even do that!?

THiN-CRUST: WALUIGI! There is no chance in hell any game has implemented a moveset for him yet and they're still clamoring for him to show up! He has to be free of the underground's clutches! (Runs the Steve-O-Meter over him and it promply displays Waluigi in Crusade.) NOOOOOO! THEY GOT HIM! CRUSADE'S GOT WALUIGI! IT'S EVERYWHERE! (DeeP DiSH and Virtuoso join in the mantra as the Doctor looks up to find the firey circle in the sky. Cue Doctor Who Intro)

#A-5: Doctor Eggman

THiN-CRUST: NO!

DeeP DiSH: Whadiya mean 'no'?

THiN-CRUST: I mean we are not adding another Sonic Character to the roster!

#A-4:

#A-3:

#A-2:

#A-1: Original Characters

#R-α: Bandana Dee

DeeP DiSH: Captain?

THiN-CRUST: (Looks to the screen to find that Bandana Dee in SSF2) IT'S EVERYWHERE! IT'S EVERYWHERE! IT'S EVERYWHERE! IT'S EVERYWHERE!

#R-Ω: Simon Belmont

#J-χ:

Kingdom Hearts X Back Cover

Kingdom Hearts X Back Cover is a mystery that requires you to read a decades old-manga to solve it. {KILL ME}

So let's get started on our main players. They act pretty accurate to their manga and mobile counterparts. Ira Tinmen is the President of the United Keyblades, he's the most level-headed of the group, even knowing when the Master of Masters inevitably fucks up. Gogalaioh Aced is the beefy bouncer of the group, always willing to take action to keep Ira on his toes. Ava is the sweet and nurturing one, -. Invi, Gula

#Q: Marville Livewire

Issue 8: Lock and Key

• Young Xehanort and Eraqus joins the group on orders from Ted Turner VII to protect the universe from Remake!King Stephan's Ghost posessing his Wife Jane Fonda XIII via Bobsheaux's Box.
• Ted Turner and Jane Fonda are playing Duel Monsters on Motorcycles while the Rest of the Livewires are on A Skateboard (Haxidecimal), Snow Skis (Hollowpoint Ninja), Rollerskates (Social Butterfly), A Radio Flyer (Gothic Lolita), And a Unicycle (Cornfed)
• Thirteen Pages in, The Livewires arrive at Al's Camping Tent (The Mansion was lost to the crap economy.)
• A Giant Gunman with an enormous pointed phallic cleft follows them into the past.
• The comic ends with Eraqus realizing the true nature of their new mecha bodies and Hax trying to cheer him up with a thing the future does not have: "Clean Underwear!"

Issue 9

Issue 10

Issue 11

Issue 12

Issue 13

WHATCULTURE

7 things from the past ten years that will utterly depress you

7. Twitch Plays Pokemon has better writers than most children's cartoons

6. The Death of Saturday Morning Cartoons

5. Robocop's Reboot features barely any Robocop!

The Robocop you've come to know was red hot as the blood it splattered across cinema screens everywhere! It sported a colorful cast of characters and a strong moral message that makes it all the more awesome for the adults who were to consume it.

This newfangled Robocop is nothing more than a bunch of copypasted characters. The only absentee was the kickass girl cop who was required to be out of commission so that the lead can save her, since the only woman on the force was replaced by Axel Foley clone No. 1221. Robocop's Chrome plating was replaced with nothing but black with the occasional dark gray for the sake of contrast. And need we remind you of the PG-13 Rating they were forced to implement?

4. Duke Nukem Forever

Imagine if you will, you waited for the Force Awakens for quite a long time and you were promised an early glimpse at the new Star Wars feature, blindly believing it to be The Force Awakens... But it's revealed to be Jar-Jar Binks starring in a New Star Wars Holiday Special!

3. Video Games have become a Floundering Industry

2. A World Without Toonami

1. The Hamburglar is a better Human than You!

Imagine if you will, a quiet suburban home where a quite handsome man spends some quality time with his wife and son, meat patties on the barbecue, flipping 'em in a hammy fashion when he receives word that a recovering McDonald's is offering an Angus Third-Pound burger for a limited time.

Naturally, A man like him would want to try one during this rare opportunity. So he gears up in a trenchcoat, red gloves, striped shirt and a cheezy black Zorro Mask that might have made him look cute back in his portly 'ol childhood days but now makes him as menacing as you'd expect out of such a well-built person of his stature.

In case you were wondering, this man is the Hamburglar, having grown up and moved on with his life since last we saw the guy in 2002: Thirteen Years Ago! And now you realize that if you fall under the category of 'privileged white 30-something man-child weeaboo loser'. You have now realized that the Hamburglar, a freakin' HR Puffinstuf-esque character from a goddamn fast-food restaurant chain was treated nicely by puberty, got himself a wife, complete with offspring, and lived a pretty decent middle-class lifestyle while Anita Sarkeesian regularly yells at you to treat women in video games seriously atop the groaning bodies of the Gamers that don't fall into the aforementioned category of '-category-'. It's sad to see how low the bottom of the masculinity barrel has gotten over the past fifteen years.

7 Essential Tips for Kingdom Hearts to Pull its act together

Intro

Kingdom Hearts has proven to be one of Square Enix's biggest cash cow franchises under its belt that isn't either A)-Final Fantasy, B)-A European/American Franchise or C)-Final Fantasy Seven. But there's this looming problem that's basically acted as a thorn on the brand's side, not alot of new fans are getting into the franchise. Even with the two HD Collections they've developed, Nomura's favorite pet project is still facing stagnant growth.

7. Reboot that sonnabitch!

Kingdom Hearts has lured fans in with a sense of mystery, answers would be provided but the game would aimlessly throw in new questions to keep the ruse up. But It was when they utilized the concept of Time Travel that we realized the shtick wasn't funny anymore. So what do you do for a mindless rollercoaster of mindfuckery? Simple, Torch the canon and run!

6. Two Worlds, One Family

-

There has to be an at least visible divide between the Disney side and Square Enix's cast of characters. I'd propose

5. A trip into the Toy Box

You may think it's a joke, but we are far from joking.

With Disney Infinity, it's possible to mix and match franchises in an internal storyline within the Safety of the Toy Box where the established canon is worth precisely dick.

4. Greyer Morality

3.

2.

1.