Les Dickery

From Superdickery

Revision as of 10:31, 23 May 2007

Les Dickery is a parody of Superdickery's actual history, written by bdsproductions under the pen name "J. Leo Arthurson".

It has absloutly no factual content, its an "epic" retelling, in other words, the Superdickery equivalent of that "great" Spider-Man: Chapter One.

Part One: Mike

Book I: The Forging of a Kingdom

In the beginning, a man named Mike sat in his throne at the height of the worlds, and said the words “Superman is a Dick”, whilst reading a sequential art magazine, and with that he created the phrase “Superdickery” and this is how it began.

Mike was a celestial king, his kingdom was a vast metropolis, and he rained supreme.

But that was to change.

Hither came Delrod and the hordes of the baboon army, and they invaded the city of Miksch.

Mike and the people of Miksch fought valiantly, but to no avail, the people of Miksch were enslaved, and Mike was banished.

All they left Mike, were a series of sequential magazines, one of a cruel and hateful git known as Superman, another of a man who wore tights and fought evil with a young man in panties, and a woman obsessed with bondage.

But lo, a few of his people escaped, and joined him in his quest, they were known as Neotom and Schide.

For a hundred years, they walked the earth, and they reached the mountain of Agatha, and its sister mountain Andria.

With a pick and hammer, he carved from Agatha, a city, his city, and he dubbed it a forum, and called it “Comics”, it was to be a society built around the sequential art magazine, a land of imagination, it was humble, but it was a start.

He built a gallery, and in it he plastered upon the walls, the pages of the sequential art magazines, and he dubbed it “Superdickery”.

In the beginning, it was but Mike, Schide and Neotom, but as the days passed, more and more people arrived from distant lands, kicked out of their homes by Delrod and his Baboon horde.

And so, a society was built

As the months progressed, Mike began to create his own mythology for the Superdickians, he would use the existing character known as the Batman, and craft it into his own tales, and he called it Legends of Batman.

The stories became increasingly popular entertainment, no bards ever arrived, as the mountain was secluded, where the Baboons could not reach it.

SD was peaceful, but soon, with overpopulation, came an anarchy....

People no longer cared of the mythology and Mike's tales, and began organizations and groups, the city soon proved to small for both, and Mike commissioned an expedition to Andre.

The expedition consisted of Neotom, one of the original pioneers, Gvalko and a young man known as SJ Whatley, with them they brought a hawk, and a piece of paper, to send their message back to Mike.

It was a long, hard mission, they climbed a mountain, and fought many battles along the road.

The journey took them from the cliffs of Mt. Agatha, through the forests below, they scaled the cliffs of Andre.

Eventually, they reached the top of Andre, it was perfectly shaped and even larger then Agatha, but there was a sacrifice in the mission, at the top of the mountain their was an avalanche, Gvalko and SJ survived, but Neotom was never seen again, his final fate remains unknown.

They sent the hawk with a letter back to Mike, the letter read:

“The expedition was a success, but at a price, we believe Neotom was killed in an avalanche, but we are not sure.

-Gvalko”.

And Mike sent a group of thirty men to Mt. Andre, to build a bridge connecting the two mountains.

The bridge required exactly five million tons of rock, held together by ropes forged by the finest magicians of Superdickery, it took precisely three years, two days, eleven hours, seven minutes, thirteen seconds and one millisecond.

The bridge was completed, and Mike split Superdickery in two sections, comics, the original city built upon mythology and dreams, and a second city built on Andre, which Mike called “Off-Topic”, dedicated to life and dreams apart from the mythology of Superdickery.

The two cities co-existed peacefully, but there was trouble in paradise.

Book II: The Rise of DarkGob

The two cities coexisted peacefully, but there was trouble in paradise, 13 years later, a young man born in Superdickery known as DarkGob, reached age twenty, and he was a man of wild, and revolutionary ideas.

DarkGob began writing a memoir of his struggle through life.

DarkGob was born in Superdickery, but at age two he and his parents immigrated to Off-topic, as a boy he idealized Mike, he was a strong and brave admin, but DarkGob grew weary of his reliance on mythology, and created his own idea for government.

His symbol was the batch, and the batch was loved, but the batch was loathed by some.

DarkGob began public speaking, he was known for his wild, often comedic style of politics, and use of bizarre catch phrases.

DarkGob's ultimate goal was to achieve Admin hood, but this was not something easy to accomplish, Mike was still loved throughout the two cities.

But, Mike grew ever busier, and he needed support, he looked to DarkGob and a young man named Bravely Brave Sir Robin to take up a job he called “Moderator”.

Moderators, or “Mods” jobs were too keep watch on the cities, on things Mike may not notice, small things.

Seeing this opportunity to gain power, DarkGob ceased it and began a crusade to become a mod, this crusade proved successful, and DarkGob became a mod.

The two cities responded well to the new political set up, and during this time a young girl who will become important to the story of Superdickery, very soon, started to make herself known.

Her name was Joyuna, she was one of the current generation, the first generation to be truly born and raised in the two cities of Superdickery, she grew up in the same neighborhood as DarkGob, but unlike DarkGob she did not immigrate to off-topic.

Some have called this the beginning of the Golden Age of Superdickery.