Sam Sorenson

From Sotf Wiki

Name: Samuel Gabriel Sorenson
Gender: Male
Age: 17
Grade: 11th
School: Franklyn Senior High School
Homeroom: Mr. Dolph's Homeroom 11B.
Hobbies and Interests: Photography (Professional, works have been featured in National Geographic, Sports Illustrated, Franklyn Senior High Gazette, and the New Jersey Times), Bible Study, and underwater basket weaving.

Appearance: Samuel Gabriel Sorenson is best described as the typical all American boy. He’s a relatively average person, standing at 5’10” and weighs 150 pounds. His face is pale yet distinctive, solely for his good facial structure and beautiful blue eyes, this makes him seem like he should be part of the Aryan army, because they provide the perfect contrast to his short wavy blonde hair.

Biography: Born into this world into a good and honest christian family Samuel Sorenson was given the best childhood possible. He was thought to be a very gifted boy from a very early age and at ten years old his photographs where gaining precedence everywhere. Sam, of course remained humble about all of this and even rejected MAXIM magazine several times because he has quite the aversion to lewd pictures (although he did later claim that it didn’t help him in his relations with the other males at Franklyn who where absolutely shocked that he refused to take photographs that would most likely allow him to see many famous celebrity women naked). Sorenson simply sighed to all this and continued his good behavior.

An interest that Sorenson has is in gory movies, he claims that they are an indulgence (of course what he doesn’t say is that he had a full hard on during House of 1000 corpses, mostly because it would ruin his reputation and he assumes it was hormones), so Sorenson is just your average guy...except for a slight incident in a movie theater of course, but don’t worry it probably is insignificant.

Advantages: Sorenson is a good person and always lives by the ideology WWJD, hopefully this will lead to many people enjoying his company and trusting him.

Disadvantages: He’s to trustworthy and friendly, also does not have a stomach for killing, it is a sin afterall.

Number: Male Student No. 42

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Designated Weapon: Blowtorch
Conclusions: If there's one person that I'd never let near my daughter, it is B42. He seems slightly...off, but I can't put my finger on it...most definitely not cut out for the game, however. He'll freak out the first time he sees a corpse, and likely end up dead praying to whatever God he believes in.

The above biography is as written by Slacker. No edits or alterations to the author's original work have been made.