A woman with a firecracker
From Create Your Own Story
The asian lady laughs, but, then, she sees your face, and, with doe eyes, says earnestly: "Crap."
At that moment, Brenda finds you, screams, "GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE!" and sticks one nice big 'ol red firecracker up your bum. It kinda feels good, until you realize it's been lit.
KA-BOOM!
The End.