Take a shit
From Create Your Own Story
You go to the bathroom and sit on the toilet seat. It is delightfully cushioned and makes your ass feel like it's in Ass Heaven. Is there a Heaven for asses? Would that mean Ass Hell exists? What other body parts have their own separate afterlives? What if someone's ass killed a man but the rest of the body was genuinely innocent and blameless for the murder?
You continue pondering these fucking stupid as hell thoughts while you shit. Somehow this reminds you that you have a dentist appointment. You fucking hate going to the dentist. You could call in to work and tell them that you've got a dentist appointment. You could also call your dentist and reschedule the appointment. There is, of course, also the option to skip going to the dentist altogether and just go to work.
Call work and tell your boss about your appointment
