Soup/Wal-mart

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Walmart? Alright. You get in your car and drive there. Yes, you have a license. Anyway, you park in a handicap spot even though you're not handicap. You want a good parking space. You limp on the way to the door so you look all old and broken up. When you walk through the door, you grab a cart. A really cute guy who works there comes up to you. "Welcome to Walmart! Can I help you?"

Are you:

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