User talk:AgentVincent
From Create Your Own Story
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Hey, do you mind if you have a read through of my story I've been working on for a while. It's called [[Remember]], it's about a guy who's forgotten who he is, and has found himself locked inside a room. I'd just like some honest feedback and anything that I should fix up or perhaps add. --[[User:Heyoeveryone|Heyoeveryone]] 17 October 2011 | Hey, do you mind if you have a read through of my story I've been working on for a while. It's called [[Remember]], it's about a guy who's forgotten who he is, and has found himself locked inside a room. I'd just like some honest feedback and anything that I should fix up or perhaps add. --[[User:Heyoeveryone|Heyoeveryone]] 17 October 2011 | ||
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== [[War Pigs]]...Toppling == | == [[War Pigs]]...Toppling == |
Revision as of 16:19, 22 October 2011
Apology accepted. Now that I know you want to be the exclusive author, I'll wait until the day when [if?] you make it open to the public before adding more pages.
BTW, great story so far... kind of similar in tone to the story "Rescue"...
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Liking the style.
Hey. Just dropping in to say that I've looked through War Pigs and Danse Macabre and love what you did with the status bar. Very clever. --TheElderOnes 12:32, 26 July 2011 (UTC)
Yeah, I recognize Walter and Carol in Danse Macabre, Jack Black and Zooey Deschanel. --TheElderOnes 07:56, 29 July 2011 (UTC)
Deaths
Thank you for your contributions to my story. Even though you got me killed and zombified, it was still funny. --TyCampbell
I think so. I'm pretty sure that's a song, but I've never heard it.
Haha, that's genious. Also, I dug up Tarman. You'd think he'd at least thank me before devouring my brain. :(
Mind Reading?
I was trying to come up with an ending for all those demonic spirits -- I didn't like having them all in the same place like that -- but your ending beats what I had in mind. I started to write where a celestial army wiped them out but didn't like the way it was heading. I like your ending better. (In reference to Stay still and let Price have her way with you page) -- Teejay
Don't Be Discouraged!
I get writer's block at times too. Just don't think about it, maybe make a few contributions in a different story or just read everyone else's work for a day or two and don't try to write. Your creative juices will come back soon enough. I know sometimes the two us get our creative juices conflicted but I think the end product after we work it out has turned out fantastic so far. I really like your writing! -- Teejay
I Hope you feel slightly special!
Because your story War Pigs, it's the first story every to be reviewed in the review section! Please don't kill me about the few bad things I've said on your story. If you want, maybe you could make a review too? It's fine if you say no, but it would be nice if there was someone to help me start up the new section. Anyway, read the review here. Hope you enjoy! -- Heyoeveryone 4 October 2011
I'm so sorry about that XD. It was my first review and I still wasn't sure how I should set them up, but now that I've written a few more, I know what to do now. Good luck on finishing War Pigs! Though, I think you should work on William's story, as he is the main character and the whole reason the events happened. -- Heyoeveryone 5 October 2011
Maybe somehow get William to accidentally injure or kill one of Michael's friends when they first confront each other, which would cause Michael to go into a never ending rage against William. Then they would face off in an epic battle of sorts, where William is trying to calm him down and continuously saying sorry. I don't know, but maybe you could use that idea perhaps? --Heyoeveryone 8 October 2011
I am very interested! If you do post it up, make sure you don't write every single plot twist, I don't want to know everything and kill the fun for me. And thank you in advance. --Heyoeveryone 8 October 2011
Well I got William and Michaels bit mostly right, and the figure that arrives when Rebecca and Vincent are fighting, could it be Karen? As for the endings being named after songs, that's a very good concept, perhaps you should make an achievement idea of sorts when you get into those endings. Oh and were those songs made after 2000 or before? Since I can't seem to remember many songs before then. --Heyoeveryone 14 October 2011
Hmm.. That's a toughie. Karen should have the lowest chance of survival. As I think she is the weakest of all the characters. William and Michael should both have a 50/50 chance of dying. Since they both face off against each other in the end and the reader has the decision of either letting Michael or William die, or perhaps both? Make sure that Michael just go insane with rage, a good way to show this is to have him shoot a random civilian while going after William and he would not give a damn, not even to look back. If you can, make a second battle in say a closed in building or in an underground floor. Then you can have William choose to 'shut down the power'. I don't know the exact abilities William to do, so I'll let you take it from there.
As for Vincent and Rebecca, perhaps get Vincent to bring reinforcements against her, but Rebecca 'can' kill them all with some sort of epic weapon like a minigun. Then just when she finishes off the last guy, Vincent goes for a stab in the back with his Rapier. This can lead to Rebecca dying, but she can also dodge the shot and kick it off his hand. They then go into hand to hand combat. I don't know about how it should end.
Each character should each have a 'happy', 'average' and 'bad' ending.
Hey, do you mind if you have a read through of my story I've been working on for a while. It's called Remember, it's about a guy who's forgotten who he is, and has found himself locked inside a room. I'd just like some honest feedback and anything that I should fix up or perhaps add. --Heyoeveryone 17 October 2011
War Pigs...Toppling
I thought War Pigs had been on the featured for some time so I removed it. No hard feelings? In any case, the story was great although I kept finding redlinks, it was quite annoying, although I have a story like that. Well, actually that was to allow people to add on.I'm ironing out spelling mistakes in all the stories , alphabetically, but since yours is a W it'lll take a long time to get there. The Kitty in the Window will be a nightmare to edit in itself. *Shudder* Besides, your story won't be in FF after the Warning and all. Hope to see how the story turns out. If two more stories and three months pass it can go up again!:)
(I'm kind of new, so haven't actually completed anything yet. Close to finishing Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Added a weird twist.)
--Snowball 16:10, 22 October 2011 (UTC)