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This is a musical I am writing; it is the text of the script so far. Please do not use any part of this in anything else. Thank you.

j o h n n y

Dramatic Personae: [In order of appearance]

St. Jimmy – A mobster with a conscience and an obsession with disco. He takes his own hits on his enemies instead of hiring hitmen. He enjoys killing, but begins to feel guilty about it. He loves disco dancing, disco clothing, disco music, and his Luger, which he has named Betty. He wears a white disco suit, with a black disco shirt, a heavy gold cross medallion, and a white hat. Sometimes a fedora, sometimes a (bucket hat?). He has a bulletproof umbrella. He helps out homeless people and people who want his help and don’t get on his nerves. He asks a price, however.

Johnny – A young man (around 19 or so) out for vengeance. He was going to the local community college, but dropped out when his family was killed by the mob. He wore a lot of black even before his family died. His favorite color is red. He likes mushrooms and beef stew.

Ferguson – An old friend and business partner of Johnny’s father. He likes to drink and he’s a bit absentminded. He’s a relatively cautious guy, likes to mind his own business.

Jenny – A nice girl, about Johnny’s age. She likes knives. She also likes Johnny. She doesn’t like St. Jimmy.

[play Dead Man’s Party, roll credits, opening name-image]

FAMILY DEATH SCENE

[Cut to shot of white jacket, with wide lapels, open to show a black wide-lapel shirt and a big gold cross medallion on a chain. The shirt is also open a bit. A hand with a white sleeve enters from the left side of the screen and pulls a pistol (an old Luger) from the jacket.]

St. Jimmy: [singing along with the music]

[Shot of horrified family: mother, father, daughter, infant. They are standing in front of a wall in what looks to be a living room. The walls are a pale green. There is a blue couch behind them, and what looks to be a family portrait.]

[Show St. Jimmy (side camera). He busts a move, moonwalks, shoots, spins, shoots, does the “Running Man,” shoots, does the “Rocket Man,” and shoots. Does a final move, then (front camera, straight-on) stands erect and poses, hands on his hips.]

St. Jimmy: My work here is done!

[Shot of a boombox, still playing. St. Jimmy’s hand reaches down and presses “Stop.” Music stops. Side view of St. Jimmy; he picks up the boom box and walks out the door, closing it behind him.]

[Black screen, text: THREE HOURS LATER:]

JOHNNY FINDS HIS FAMILY

[knocking]

Disembodied voice: Hello? Mom? Dad? Jessie? Anybody home?

[sound of keys, show doorknob turning. Door opens, to reveal…]

[Enter Johnny, looks inside; gets a shocked look]

[shot of family portrait on the pale green wall, with blood spattered across it. It shows the family we saw earlier, plus Johnny.]

Johnny: HOLY-

THE FUNERAL I

[cut scene abruptly. Go to black. Fade in to funeral. Johnny is there, watching as the three normal coffins and one tiny coffin are buried next to each other. St. Jimmy is there too, standing a distance away from the gathering. Johnny stares at him. St. Jimmy doffs his hat, bows, replaces his hat, and walks away with a spring in his step. Johnny stares after him, hatred in his eyes. He leaves, storming off in the direction that St. Jimmy went, forcing his way through the crowd. He breaks free of the crowd- and St. Jimmy is nowhere to be seen. Johnny, feeling impotent and powerless, hangs his head and turns back to the funeral. An older gentleman, also attending the funeral, sees Johnny, and misinterpreting his mood:]

Ferguson: You know, funerals aren’t exactly my kind of thing either, Johnny.

[Johnny looks at him quizzically.]

Ferguson: My name’s Michael Ferguson. I’m an old friend of your father’s. I know you from the pictures he carried with him. He always used to talk about his family, before… well, you know. Come on, I’ll buy you a drink and we can talk about it.

[cut to bar scene. They’re both at the bar with a bottle of beer.]

JOHNNY GETS A CLUE

Johnny: I just wish I knew who did it. Then at least I could do something about it.

Ferguson: Do what? Go charging off to avenge your family? You’d probably get shot up just like them. Or worse, you wouldn’t be able to find the courage to face whoever did it, once you find out, and have to live with the shame of that. [shakes his head] Don’t bother with that. It’s a waste of time. I doubt your father would want you risking your life for some crazy idea of ‘honor.’

Johnny: Then what should I do?

Ferguson: Move on with your life. Get yourself a job, find yourself a girl, settle down somewhere, have a few kids.

[Johnny muses over this for a while.]

Johnny: There was this weird guy hanging around at the funeral. He looked like some kind of disco dancer. When he saw me looking at him, he bowed and left. Any idea who he was?

Ferguson: Hmm… He sounds like St. Jimmy. Odd character. Dangerous to people who aren’t on his good side. I’d stay away from him if I were you.

Johnny: Did he know my father?

Ferguson: Yeah… we both did. Did a little business with him. It went bad; we got out. Sent someone over with a gift and our apologies, haven’t heard from him since.

Johnny: Do you think maybe he’s the one who killed my family?

Ferguson: Well, may- [stiffens, looks at Johnny sideways.] Say, you aren’t planning on rushing off and trying to snuff him, are you? Didn’t I tell you not to try to avenge your family, that it’d be foolish, et cetera?

Johnny: [does his best to look innocent] Of course not! I just want to know more about my father’s life, that’s all. I never really knew him too well; he wasn’t home often. Was always off on ‘business.’ I want to know what kind of business he was doing that got him involved with a guy like this St. Jimmy character. Ferguson: [gives some kind of back story involving something illegal but with good intentions that I’ll make up later]

JOHNNY GETS A JOB [He tries to move on, and gets himself a job working at a bookstore. He’s still depressed, understandably.]

JOHNNY MEETS JENNY [Johnny meets Jenny at the bookstore. They start talking, and end up going out on a date.]

TALKING ‘BOUT ST. JIMMY [Johnny tells Jenny about his family while they are on a cliff overlooking the bay at night. Jenny has heard of St. Jimmy, but mostly about the good that he has done. She never did trust him. Says so. Et cetera.]

JENNY’S ENCOUNTER WI/ THE SAINT [Jenny meets St. Jimmy at the knife and gun shop. St. Jimmy is getting his Luger cleaned, fixed, etc. Something wrong with the trigger, it jams sometimes. Jenny is getting some knives. They start talking. Jenny brings up Johnny’s family, St. Jimmy doesn’t like her. He talks about business. Jenny storms out, St. Jimmy buys some ammo.]

JENNY’S DEATH [Jenny dies for saying what she said to St. Jimmy. Johnny finds her dead body, much like ha found his family. Also finds a note on a table, that Jenny had written, saying that she might be in danger, had talked to St. Jimmy, etc.]

JOHNNY MOURNS; DECIDES [Cops come, question Johnny. He mourns for Jenny. He walks away, and makes up his mind to find St. Jimmy and kill him.]

JOHNNY JOINS THE MOB [Johnny asks around and finds out where the mob can be found; where St. Jimmy helps out the homeless who want help. He goes there, finds the Saint, and offers to join him. Says he wants to help, and has a keen eye for business matters. St. Jimmy doesn’t trust him, but allows him to join. Johnny doesn’t let St. Jimmy know who he is or who his family is, gives a false identity.]

JOHNNY GETS ON THE SAINT’S GOOD SIDE [Johnny saves St. Jimmy’s life; he wants to kill him himself. St. Jimmy sees this as Johnny risking his own life to save his, and decides he can trust Johnny.]

THE FIRST JOB [Johnny goes on his first job in the employ of St. Jimmy. Does well to impress St. Jimmy and convince him that Johnny has nothing but good intentions.]

TALKING WITH SAINT JIMMY [Johnny talks with St. Jimmy. St. Jimmy likes him more and more. Johnny still hates him, but pretends to like him. The power of the mob tempts him, but he refuses. He sees the mob as small, and his family’s death and vengeance as huge. He has begun to go insane already, and begins to have delusions.]

ST. JIMMY TALKS WITH GOD [St. Jimmy is starting to feel remorse, has for a while. Talks with his God, tries to atone. Et cetera.]

JOHNNY PLANS [Johnny, in the midst of his madness, becomes more and more manipulative, and schemes and plots St. Jimmy’s demise. Finds evidence that his father was a murderer, thief, etc., and that St. Jimmy is more moral than his father, but is set on avenging his family anyways. He hears voices. They tell him to kill St. Jimmy, and how to do it.

ST. JIMMY DIES [In this scene, Johnny’s plan is about to come to fruition. He and St. Jimmy are at the edge of the bay, and St. Jimmy is talking, facing the bay. Johnny has a garrote hidden in his coat. He is not listening to St. Jimmy, he is listening to the voices in his head. As he is about to pull out the garrote and kill St. Jimmy, St. Jimmy turns, and says to Johnny: “Goodbye, Jonathan. You’ve been a good friend.” He pulls out his Luger, puts it under his jaw, and shoots himself. His brains fly out into the bay. The voices in Johnny’s head fall silent and he stands there, shocked and stunned, agape. St. Jimmy’s bodyguards rush past him to grab St. Jimmy’s dead body, a commotion ensues. Johnny leaves without saying a word.

JOHNNY WALKS AWAY [In this scene, Johnny walks through the alleyways of the city, and hears the homeless talking about St. Jimmy in glowing terms. He announces what has just happened, and keeps walking. He walks to an abandoned warehouse and hangs himself, having no purpose left.]

THE FUNERAL II [Johnny’s funeral. His friends are there. They weep for him. Denouement-type stuff. This scene not necessary, could be deleted. Could instead end with the instant of Johnny’s hanging.]

END CREDITS

Katie's Demon A screenplay by Brian Pait

Dramatic Personae:

Katie: A weird green-haired girl with no friends. She has odd interests and is lonely. Other people make fun of her or avoid her. She tries to summon a demon to be her friend.

Kent: A nyx, summoned by Katie, who takes a very long time to arrive

Rolf: An art student who Katie meets at art school.

Popular girls: Popular girls. They dress alike and make fun of Katie.

Katie’s dad: Katie’s dad. Duh.

Teacher 1: Katie’s Ancient World History teacher.

ACT I

Scene 1

School. Katie, walking. She is wearing a black shapeless hat and a faux army jacket wi/zippered pockets. The jacket is closed. She has black cargo pants on. She has hair that is naturally a rather dark brown, but it is dyed green from just above the bottom of the hat downwards. She has brown eyes and glasses with black rectangular frames. Her hair is just a bit shorter than shoulder-length and untied.

She walks into class, sits down. Nobody talks to her, or even looks at her. She looks at other students, says nothing. Gets out her supplies. Class starts.

Teacher 1: Alright class, let’s begin. Today we are continuing learning about the Sumerians. Can anybody tell me what kind of religion they had?

Katie: (hand shoots up) They had ziggurats for temples, each of which was controlled by an Ensi associated with each divinity. The various deities were part of a pantheon known as the Anunaki, which translates to “Heaven and Earth.” The main gods were An, Enlil, Enki, Ninhursag, Ashur, Ninlil, Ninurta, Marduk-

Teacher 1: (interrupting Katie) That’s enough Katie. I wasn’t looking for a lesson on theology. All I wanted was to see if you all remembered that the Sumerian religion was polytheistic.

Several students snicker; a group of like-dressed girls laugh at Katie. She slumps in her chair as the class continues, lowering her eyes to her desk. [Show desk, with paper sticking out of binder with the title Demonology: A Complete Practical Guide to (the rest is covered)].

Scene 2

Cut to scene in hall, students exiting class. Katie is shoved aside by the “popular girls,” and she drops her books. The printout on demonology falls out. A blonde girl sees it.

Blonde girl: (sarcastically/patronizing) Are you going to summon a demon to bite me, um… whatever your name is?

Other girls laugh as Katie snatches up the printout, and they continue walking as she glares at them. Nobody helps her pick up her books. Cut to Katie walking out of school, then to her on the bus, then entering her home.

Scene 3

Katie’s dad: Hi, Katie! How was school?

Katie: (irritated) Fine, Dad. I’m gonna go study in my room, okay?

Katie’s dad: Okay. Just holler if you need anything.

Katie walks into her room, tosses her bookbag onto a bed (really just a mattress, some blankets and some pillows on the floor). Shot of the demonology thing sticking out, then shot of the room. There is a poster of Anton Szandor LeVay on the wall, one of Einstein sticking his tongue out, etc. The room is messy. There is a filing cabinet, a desk with a computer, a cheir by a window, random other things. Shot of Katie from the door as she sits down at the computer and starts clicking and typing. Shot of computer screen: Shows an article on Satanic Spellcasting: Hurling Curses and Hexes For Beginners. Shot of Katie’s face from the side. She mutters to herself.

Katie: Stupid girls. They wouldn’t even know an Allu from Asag. I bet the worst thing they have to worry about is how to decide which boy to say ‘yes’ to first. Types furiously for a few more seconds, glances at bed, looks back at computer screen and looks at bed again. Shot of the demonology printout sticking out of her bookbag. Shot of Katie’s face, looking thoughtful.

Scene 4

Cut to scene of same room, but cleaned up and darkened. It is lit by a bunch of black candles and one white candle. Katie is dressed in black and holding a piece of paper with writing on it.

Katie: (in a confident, commanding voice) Ilasa micalazoda olapireta ialpereji beliore: das odo Busadire Oiad ouoaresa caosago: casaremeji Laiada eranu berinutasa cafafame das ivemeda aqoso adoho Moz, od maoffasa. Bolape como belioreta pamebeta. Zodacare od Zodameranu! Odo cicale Qaa. Zodoreje, lape zodiredo Noco Mada, hoathahe Saitan! Come forth spirit, and guide me! Aid me in my plight! Be to me as I would to you! Hail Satan! Shemhamforash!

She lights the paper with one of the black candles and drops it in a dish, then watches it burn. She waits. Nothing happens for a while. She looks around. Nothing happens.

Katie: Hello? (Pause.) Hello? Any… spirits around here? (Waits for an answer. None comes. She sighs.) Oh, well. I guess it didn’t work.

Katie blows out a candle, and scene ends abruptly.

END OF ACT I

ACT II

Scene 1

Begin with Katie going to school again. She's wearing an outfit similar to the one she wore the previous day, but the faux military shirt is a reddish color today instead of greenish. The popular girls talk in whispers, all look at Katie, and laugh. Katie glares at them and continues walking. Cut to art class. Teacher 2 is taking roll. One guy up near the front of the class [Rolf] keeps looking back at Katie. Katie begins staring at him, wondering why he keeps glancing back at her. He is looking at her when the teacher calls his name.

Teacher 2: Rolf? Rolf? (knocks on Rolf's desk; he turns with a start and looks at the teacher) Pay attention, Rolf. I almost marked you absent.

Rolf: Y-yes ma'am.

The teacher continues to take roll. Rolf glances back at Katie again, gives her a shy smile, then turns back and does not look at her again.

Stock Market Game: www.stockmarketgame.org Username: CLA_14_ZZ1331 Password: SJB25091

Brian Pait Arthur Davis Robert Leatham Period 1 Michael Wandrey Period 3 Week 4: Script

Movie for Teachings of Great Proletariat Revolution and Failure of Soviet Russia

Dramatis Personae: Professor Hobo, Expert of Economics – Brian Pait The Last Czar, Nicholas II / Nikolay Aleksandrovich Romanov (Никола́й Алекса́ндрович Рома́нов) – Robert Leatham Peasant / Bolshevik – Brian Pait The Komrades – Various lowerclassmen Announcer Guy – Chiheng Huor Mao Tse-Tung / Zedong / Tze-Tong – Michael Wandrey Chinese Peasant – Michael Wandrey Stalin – Brian Pait Hua Guofeng – Brian McKay Deng Xiaoping – Arthur Davis American Consumer/Producer – Robert Leatham Captain Poland – Michael Piastucki Der Kaiser / Kaiser Bill – Ryan Kerfoot Gorbachev – Robert Leatham Communist Hardliner – Brian Pait

[Scene I – In an office, with a desk. Professor Hobo sits behind the desk.]

Prof. Hobo – To understand the Russian revolution and the fall of the USSR, one must understand a vital aspect of Russian culture – the importance of vodka. Vodka is an essential part of Russian tradition, and is drank at celebrations, during holidays, when something good happens, when something bad happens, and to stave off the freezing cold in the winter. It is a large part of the Russian economy due to this. Here is a clip of a Russian cosmonaut discussing Apollo XIII to illustrate this point.

[Play clip: “When we heard, that the American astronauts survived, there was a big cheer- and we went to the bar and drank vodka, as was Russian tradition.”]

Prof. Hobo – Thus, taking away vodka would rob the Russians of an extremely important and ingrained part of their heritage, and deal a significant blow to their economy. Unfortunately for the Russian royal family, the Czars underestimated the importance of vodka during World War I.

[End scene.]

[Scene II – The Czar Nicholas II sits on a throne, wearing a furry crown. He pulls Captain Poland from one side as Der Kaiser pulls Captain Poland from the other side. A sign is hung from Captain Poland’s neck that says World War I.] The Last Czar - Our soldiers are not fighting well enough against Germany, and we are not producing enough supplies. The workers, farmers, and soldiers must be drinking too much! A ban on Vodka begins immediately!

Peasant/Bolshevik – But, Czar! Vodka is an important part of our economy, and we are already poor from the heavy tax burden you have placed on us with your war! My niece is getting married on Tuesday- how will we celebrate without vodka or money?

The Last Czar – No vodka for you! Celebrations distract from your work! The more you work, the sooner we win the war! The sooner we win the war, the sooner you get money and vodka back!

Peasant/Bolshevik – I will not stand for this! Your incentives will not produce the desired results- the negative externalities are too great, and heavily outweigh the benefits! [Soviet star appears on the Peasant/Bolshevik’s furry hat.] I must revolt for the sake of my people! Revolution- for Peace, Equality, Brotherhood and Vodka! Workers of the world unite! You have nothing to lose but your chains!

The Last Czar – What?! That’s not supposed to happen! Let me see that script! [The Peasant/Bolshevik pulls a script out of his coat and hands it to The Last Czar.] What’s this? My title isn’t “The Last Czar!”

Peasant/Bolshevik – It is now! Get him, Komrades!

Komrades – [entering stage left] For Lenin! For the Communist Party! [They charge at The Last Czar.]

[Cut to black. End Scene II.]

[Scene III – Announcer Guy suddenly jumps out of stage right, smiling and holding a box of glue, paper and scissors.]

Announcer Guy – Supplies! Meanwhile, in China! [Exuent stage right.]

[Switch to Mao Zedong, in the fields of China.]

Mao – The fething Brits! They ruined our pride with their Opium Wars! The Dynasties failed. The Nationalist Republic failed. The Nationalists are backstabbing fascists. We helped win this second world war! We must rule now! Peasants, rise up and win your freedom! One Party, One Nation, One Victory! For the Party!

Peasants – Peasant Power GO!!!!! [fight Nationalists, win.]

Mao – Now, we must imitate the Russian communists with five-year plans! Make steel, now!

Chinese Peasant – We peasants are farming people, and fail at making steel. We are starving because we are spending too much time trying to meet steel quotas to grow food!

Mao – Fools! You worship me now!

Announcer Guy – [jumps to enter stage right] Meanwhile, in Russia! [jumps out stage left]

[camera shifts to the left]

Stalin – [exact same stance and speech patterns as Mao.] Fools! You worship me now!

[camera shifts back to Mao, looking uneasy.]

Mao – Do not trust the Russian Soviet moustache-man. He owe me five dollars.

[Sign obscures view: YEARS LATER]

Mao – Gua huegoo! Echlthwat!

Jiang Qing – He is crippled with illness, but I can understand him! He says I rule!

[Mao dies, topples. Other Chinese officials come in and huddle with Jiang Qing, then face the camera.]

Official 1 – We have decided. Hua Guofeng will succeed Mao.

[Enter Hua Guofeng from stage right.]

Hua Guofeng – Hi! I think we should make reforms- in agriculture, industry, science & technology, and national defence. Zhou Enlai suggested it, and it sounded like a good idea.

[Enter Deng Xiaoping stage left]

Deng Xiaopeng – I think you should let me take over.

Hua Guofeng – Okay. [exuent stage right]

Deng Xiaoping – Mao was only 70% right. I am infallible! [shifty eyes] I think we should instate re- I mean, Four Great Modernizations- in Agriculture, Industry, Science & Technology, and National Defence. Is my idea not original and incredible?!

Wei Jingsheng – What about the Fifth Modernization, Liberty?

Deng Xiaoping – Silence, underling! You are but a counterrevolutionary electrician, and know not the ways of the world! You will be purged!

Official – There is unrest in the Soviet satellite countries. Perhaps some freedom would be good?

Deng Xiaoping – Okay… Here, some freedom.

People – Yaaay! We want freedom!

Deng Xiaoping – No freedom for you. Too loud. Well, okay, here’s some freedom again…

People – Yaay!

Deng – Yoink! No freedom! Ha ha ha! Dance, monkeys, dance!

[End scene III.]

[Scene IV – Sign, saying “Russia- The 80’s.” Gorbachev stands next to it.]

Gorbachev – We need reforms! China has shown us the way. First, political. I shall instate perestroikia and glasnost- Political restructuring and openness, to rid us of corruption and secret operations! And let the satellite nations decide on their own whether to be a part of our Soviet Empire or not!

Official – [pops in] Sir, the satellite nations left us. Only the nations bound to us forcefully are remaining, and they are rioting.

Gorbachev – Send in the tanks. [Official exuent stage left] On to the next problem! Econo- umm… That can wait. Alcoholism! The Russian people drink too much. [Cue horror-movie music for a few seconds.] I will try to convince them to drink less vodka.

[Pan out to show that Gorbachev is standing on a wooden crate labeled “Russian Economy,” supported by bottles of vodka.]

Gorbachev – People of Russia! There is a problem we face- and it is called Alcoholism. You are ruining your livers with your vodka. Your drunkenness leads to lack of productivity and abusiveness. This is not good for the nation and the party! You must stop drinking so much!

[Russian peasants begin to come in and remove bottles of vodka. Gorbachev continues to speak as they do this.]

Gorbachev – We must cease our adversity with the West and work with them if we are to survive!

Communist Hardliner – [enter stage left] Blasphemy! We will not work with the Capitalist pig-dogs!

Gorbachev – Yes we will, and you’ll like it, too!

Communist Hardliner – [backs off, hurt, seems to be thinking. Gets an idea, runs to Gorbachev waving his arms around.] Military couuuuuuup! Military couuuuup! Military couuuuup!

[Gorbachev pushes Communist Hardliner.]

Communist Hardliner – [as he falls] I fail! Nooooo! Do not banish me!

Gorbachev – Banished!

[By now most of the bottles have been removed. One more is removed, and the economy crate collapses, bringing Gorbachev down with it. He looks bewildered, for a minute, then leaves. Enter American consumer/producer person.]

American: Now the Red Empire is gone, demand for the Soviet things has skyrocketed! [picks up Soviet hat] This is worth a lot now!

[End scene IV.]

[Scene V – Professor Hobo behind his desk again, with vodka.]

Prof. Hobo – So as Gorbachev lowered the demand for vodka, and worked to improve the standard of living, vodka stopped moving, both in the black market for extra vodka and through legal channels. With it, the money stopped moving, and the economy became stagnant. In short, it failed, collapsed. Russia began the slow process of returning to capitalism, and rebuilding its economy- starting by selling off its stock of Soviet weapons, uniforms, equipment, and other paraphernalia to international markets of consumers looking to get a taste of the old Soviet empire. The arms market changed swiftly as supply skyrocketed and demand did not change- prices plunged, and small, poorly funded extremist groups found that they could now arm themselves as well as their enemies. The arms business and the souvenir business put Russia back in business as best as it could, but even now Russia is a poor country, despite its dealings with India in military technology development and sales. Meanwhile, China found that demand for everything that they had was increasing as long as they could sell it, and so the economic reforms continued- until China reached its current state, which resembles fascism more than communism, despite the name. In whatever form it survived- through propaganda, economic manipulation, and the sheer amount of resources it has, China survived.

D&D Character Background Info Introduction Questions

1. Give a two or three word description of yourself. (Describe your character concept.) Punk banjo bard. 2. Do you have any nicknames, street names, titles, nom de plume? Jagi Backswing 3. What is your full birth name? Jack mac Brinn 4. Where do you live? The Eastern district, in a basement off an alleyway, under a tavern. 5. Why do you live there? The rent's cheap. 6. What is your citizenship status? Natural-born citizen. 7. What is your most obvious blessing or strength? Skill with the banjo. 8. What do you perceive as your greatest strength? My charisma and ability to deal well with others and get what I need. 9. What is your most obvious flaw or weakness? My weakness for women. 10. What do you perceive as your greatest weakness? My bad fortune. 11. Was there any event or cause of these weaknesses? Not really. Just basic character flaws; fall in love easily and not particularly job-oriented.

Physical Traits

1. How old are you? 19 2. What is your gender? Male. 3. What is your species/race? Human. 4. How tall are you? 5'7" 5. How much do you weigh? 125 lb.s. (malnourished) 6. What is your general body type, frame, bone structure, and poise? Skinny, kind of lanky, angular jaw, kind of high cheekbones, thin nose that looks like it's been broken once or twice in the past, stand with my head high and a foot back. 7. What is your skin colour? Caucasian, kind of olive skin. 8. What is your hair colour? Black. 9. What is your hair style? Longish, almost shoulder length, greasy, wavy. 10. Do you have any facial hair? No. 11. What is your eye colour? Light brown. 12. Does it change? Not really. Sometimes it looks darker. 13. How attractive are you? I'm told I'm fairly attractive, but I don't think I am. 14. What is your most distinguishing feature? One permanently raised eyebrow that causes trouble 'cause people think it expresses an opinion or sumthin' when that's just how it looks. 15. Do you have any scars, tattoos, or birthmarks? Scar on back and across the ribs diagonally, as well as scarred knuckles and forearms. Callusses on fingers. 16. If so, how did you acquire them? The callusses are from playing the banjo. The rest are from knife fights. You shoulda seen the other guy, though... 17. What do these distinguishing marks look like? Like somebody slashed me a few good ones. What else? Though, the ones on m' knuckles are from me hittin' th' other guy. 18. Do they have any special significance? Th' mean I get into fights sometimes, whaddya think they mean? 19. Where are they located? .... 20. What is your handedness (left/right)? I've been diagnosed with left-handedness. Still play the banjo right-handed, tho. 21. Do you resemble some currently known person? M'self. Some girls say I look like some actor. 22. What is your hand size/description? Longish fingers with callusses, scarred knuckles, hands normal sized. 23. Do you wear a uniform? Hell no. 24. What kind of clothing do you wear? Thin leather vest, rough cloth pants, seldom-washed shirt, worn boots, old suspenders. If any armor is worn, it's studded leather. 25. What is your clothing's style or level of sophistication? I dunno. I wear what the immigrants wear, 'cause they got cheap clothes. 26. What size are you for various pieces of clothing? Small-medium shirt, tight pants. 27. Do you wear makeup? No. I'm not an elf, an' I'm not a girl. Ain't one a' those pretty-boys, neither. 28. Do you wear glasses/contacts? Can't afford 'em even if I needed them. 29. What sort of vocal tone do you have? Voice is kinda harsh, tenor, can still sing well. 30. Do you get sick? ' Duh. I just ignore it if I get sick, but yeah, everybody gets sick. 31. Maybe you catch the flu twice a year and that's it? Somethin' like that, maybe. 32. Or maybe you have a weak immune system and catch anything that goes around? Nah, I don't have it bad like that.

History

1. Where is your homeland? Here. 2. What are it's people like? You know damn well. They don't got no money, and those that do steer clear of here. 3. Are you aware of it's history? Uh... no. 4. Are you patriotic or a social outcast? Social outcast, I guess. 5. What are your opinion of home? It's a roof over my head. 6. Where is your home town? Here. 7. What is your home town's name? You know damn well. 8. What was the area like and how did it affect you? You know damn well. 9. Did you witness any historical events? Not yet. 10. If so, how did that event impact you? .... 11. Are your real reason for becoming an adventurer different from what you tell others?

• shrug* Needed money, that's all. Got evicted, got involved. Had this girl too, real scary, got mad at me, so I had ta leave.

12. If so, how might such secrets be revealed?

• glare*

13. How far would you go to keep such secrets from being revealed? What would you do if the truth became known? To tell the truth, I don't quite know why m'self. *read: I'd lie to people's faces, maybe pick fights, make 'em underestimate me.* 14. What do you fear would occur if the truth became known? I'd get arrested for high treason. I mean, I'd smash your face in. 15. Do you have any particularly high or low ability scores?

• looks confused* Ability scores? The hell?

16. If so, were these scores a result of you past? .... 17. How have these scores affected your life so far? >_> 18. Did you affect you in your chosen profession?

19. What about your race, growing up were you in the majority or a minority?

20. How were you treated by other nearby races?

21. Were you persecuted for your race?

22. Did this impact your outlook in any way?

23. Did it affect your personality?

24. How do you feel about other races?

25. Do you have any justification from your past experience for holding such views?

26. Were there any traumatic experiences in your early years (death of a family member, abandonment, orphaned at an early age, etc.)?

27. Briefly describe a defining moment in your childhood and how it influenced your life.

28. What was childhood like for you?

29. Was it calm and peaceful or turbulent and traumatic?

30. Did you have any childhood friends?

31. If so, who and where are they now?

32. Are you still close to them or have you grown apart?

33. What stupid things did you do when you were younger?

34. Which toys from your childhood have you kept?

35. Why? What do they mean to you?

36. If you didn't keep any, why not?

37. What did you do to them all?

38. Do you have any deep, dark secrets in the past that may come back to haunt you?

39. What conflicts might arise from your past?

40. Are you who you claim to be?

41. Do you have any sort of criminal record?

42. How do you view the heroes/legends of your country?

Family

1. Who were your parents?

2. Were you raised by them?

3. If not, then why didn't they and who did raise you?

4. What is your father's full name?

5. What is your mother's full name?

6. What did your parents and/or foster parents do for a living?

7. What was their standing in the community?

8. Did your family stay in one area or move around a lot?

9. How did you get along with their parents?

10. How would your parents describe you? Answer this in the voice of your mother, then in your father's.

11. Do you have any siblings?

12. If so how many and what were their names?

13. What was your birth position in the family (i.e.-ast born, and child, rd, etc.)?

14. How did you get along with each of their siblings?

15. What was your family life like?

16. List all current knowledge of family locations, spouses, children, birth dates, schooling and any important incidents that only you and they might remember.

17. Are any or all of your family still alive?

18. If so, where are they now?

19. Do you stay in touch with them or have you become estranged?

20. Draw out your family tree, including living and dead relatives.

21. Do you love or hate one member of the family in particular?

22. Is any member of the family special to you in any way (perhaps, as a confidant, mentor, or arch-rival)?

23. Are there any black (or white) sheep in the family (including you)?

24. If so, who are they and how did they "gain" the position?

25. If this person is not you, then how do you feel about them?

26. Do you have a notorious or celebrated ancestor?

27. If so, what did this person do to become famous or infamous?

28. What do people assume about you once your ancestry is revealed? Do you try to live up to the reputation of their ancestor, try to live it down, or ignore it?

29. Have you begun your own family?

30. If not, do you ever want to have a family of your own someday?

31. If so, with who or what type of person?

32. What type of person would be your ideal mate?

33. What would you be willing to do to protect such a person?

34. Is there anything you wouldn't do to protect such a person and if so what?

35. Would anything change your mind on this issue and if so, what?

Relationships

1. Do you have any close friends?

2. If so, who and what are they like?

3. What is the history of their relationship(s) with you?

4. Do you currently have a best friend whom you would protect with your reputation or your life?

5. If so, who are they and what caused you to feel so close to them? What would have to happen for you to end this relationship?

6. Do you have any bitter enemies?

7. If so, who are they, what are they like, and what is the history of their feud with you?

8. Have you defeated them before?

9. How might these enemies seek to discomfit you in the future?

10. What valuable or important contacts do you have?

11. How did you come to know them?

12. Which person(s) or group(s) are you most loyal to?

13. List any past serious relationships that you have had, and give a brief overview of the relationship(s).

14. How do you think others generally perceive you?

15. If someone crossed your path, what would you do?

16. Who is your most trusted ally?

17. Who do you trust, in general?

18. Who do you despise and why?

19. Name seven things you hate in others.

20. Is your image consistent?

21. Do people see you in similar ways?

22. Do you deliberately present yourself differently in different situations, and how?

23. For what would you die for?

24. For whom would you go to extremes for?

25. Who does you turn to when you're in trouble?

26. What is the worst thing someone has done to you?

27. What are your general reaction to an attractive member of the opposite sex who lets you know they are available?

28. How do you get along with others in the same field and/or work environment?

29. How can you be blackmailed, beaten, and tricked (by PCs or NPCs)?

30. Have you lost any loves?

31. How did you handle the situation (short & long term)?

32. Who would miss you, should you go missing?

33. Who might protect you?

34. Who might be convinced to sell you out?

35. How close are you to your friends?

36. What do they know about you?

37. What do they not know about you?

38. What do you know and not know about them?

39. Do you live with anyone (housemates, roommates, relatives, friends, near-strangers, family friend, spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend, lover)?

40. Are you a member of any special interest groups?

41. What is your level of involvement?

42. What is your current status with local law-enforcement?

43. Do you have a record of cooperation or non-cooperation with authorities?

44. Do you have a file with local, national or internation law enforcement?

Personality/Beliefs

1. Do you, or did you, have any role models? Do you have any heroes or idols, either contemporary or from legend?

2. If so, have you ever met them?

3. Did you ever become disillusioned with former heroes or idols? If so, why and what were the circumstances?

4. When did you decide to become an adventurer?

5. Why have you chosen to risk your life as a career?

6. What do you expect to get out of being an adventurer (satisfaction, glory, money, redemption, etc.)? What, if anything, would make them stop adventuring (death of a loved one, marriage, mutilation, money, position, old age, etc.)?

7. Do you have any dreams or ambitions?

8. If not, why?

9. How does adventuring fit into this dream, or does it at all?

10. What are your short term goals (what would you like to be doing within a year)?

11. What are your long term goals (what would you like to be doing twenty years from now)?

12. If these goals seem at odds with each other or with your dreams, how do you reconcile the differences?

13. How do you seek to fulfill these dreams, goals, & ambitions?

14. Do you have any great rational or irrational fears or phobias? If so, what are the origins of or reasons behind them?

15. What, if anything, would it take for you to be able to overcome this?

16. How do you react when this fear manifests itself?

17. Are you willing to discuss, or even admit to, the situation?

18. What are your attitudes regarding material wealth?

19. Are you miserly with your share of the wealth, or do you spend it freely?

20. Are you greedy or generous?

21. Do you see wealth as a mark of success, or just as a means to an end?

22. How do you generally treat others?

23. Do you trust easily (perhaps too easily) or not?

24. Are you introverted (shy and withdrawn) or extroverted (outgoing)?

25. Are you a humble soul or blusteringly proud?

26. Do you act differently than you feel (concealing your true thoughts)?

27. What habits would you find most annoying in friends?

28. Is there any race, creed, alignment, religion, class, profession, political viewpoint, or the like against which you is strongly prejudiced, and why?

29. How do others typically react to you?

30. Why, in your opinion, do they act that way?

31. What are your most annoying habits?

32. What is your favourite food?

33. What is your favourite drink?

34. What is your favourite treat (desert)?

35. Do you favour a particular cuisine?

36. Do you savor the tastes when eating or "wolf down" your food?

37. Do you like food mild or heavily spiced?

38. Are there any specific foodstuffs that you find disgusting or refuse to eat?

39. Are you allergic to any food?

40. What are your favourite colour(s)?

41. Is there any colour that you dislike?

42. Do you have a favourite (or hated) song, type of music, or instrument?

43. What is your favourite bard song?

44. If you have a favourite scent, what is it?

45. What is your favourite type of animal?

46. Why do you category that creature?

47. Do you have an animal totem or affinity, and if so for what?

48. Is there a certain type of animal that you hate or fear?

49. Are you allergic to any kinds of animals?

50. Do you have any allergies?

51. Is there anything that enrages you?

52. Is there anything which embarrasses you?

53. How do you react to being teased about it?

54. Do you enjoy "roughing it", or do you prefer your creature comforts?

55. Do you believe in the gods or not?

56. Do you have a patron Deity?

57. Are you devout or impious?

58. Do you actively worship and proselytize or do you simply pay lip service?

59. What lengths would you go to defend your faith?

60. Was your faith influenced or molded by anyone special?

61. Do you belong to the orthodox church, or a fringe element thereof (and is the group accepted, frowned upon, or considered heretics)?

62. How has this impacted your faith and life?

63. Is your church an accepted religion where you grew up or did it have to conduct its services in secret?

64. How did this affect your faith and life?

65. Have you, personally, ever been persecuted for your faith?

66. If so, when and how did you handle it?

67. Can you kill?

68. When did you decide (or learn) that they could?

69. What happened and how did you handle it?

70. When do you consider it okay to kill (under what circumstances)?

71. When do you consider it wrong to kill (under what circumstances)?

72. What would you do if someone else attempted to (or successfully did) kill under their "wrong" circumstances, what would be your reaction?

73. What if it were your enemy?

74. What if it were your friend?

75. What if it were an innocent?

76. What if the opponent were not in control of their own actions (i.e.-under duress, charmed, dominated, possessed, etc.)?

77. What would you do if someone shot at (attacked) you?

78. What would you do if something were stolen from you?

79. What would you do if you were badly insulted publicly?

80. What would you do if a good friend or relative were killed by means other than natural death?

81. What is the one task you would absolutely refuse to do?

82. What do you consider to be the worst crime someone could commit and why?

83. How do you feel about government (rulers) in general?

84. Why do you feel that way?

85. Do you support the current government of your homeland?

86. If so, how far are you willing to go to defend the government? If not, do you actively oppose it?

87. Do you belong to an anti-government organization?

88. If so, describe the group and it's aims.

89. What form of government do you believe is the best (democracy, monarchy, anarchy, aristocratic rule, oligarchy, matriarchy) and why?

90. Have you ever been persecuted for their political stance?

91. If so, describe the occurrence and how it affected you?

92. Are you a member of any non-religious group, cause, order, or organization?

93. If so describe it, its goals, and membership.

94. How loyal are you to this group and why?

95. How did you become a member?

96. If you are a former member, did you leave voluntarily or involuntarily and why?

97. Was it under good (amicable) conditions or bad?

98. Are you being sought or hunted by the organization?

99. If so, by whom and with what intent (to murder you, to force your return through blackmail or coercion, to spy on you and make sure they do not reveal any of the groups secrets)?

100. Do you have any unusual habits or dominant personality traits that are evident to others?

101. If so, describe them and how you acquired them, as well as when they might be more noticeable and what causes them?

102. How do you react if made fun of for any of these things?

103. Do you have any unusual or nervous mannerisms, such as when talking, thinking, afraid, under stress, or when embarrassed?

104. If so, are there any reasons behind them from your past?

105a. Do you have an unusual gait or accent?

105. If so, where did you acquire them?

106. Are there any circumstances where they become more (or less) evident?

107. How do you feel and react if made fun of for any of these things?

108. What is your favourite colour?

109. What place would you most like to visit?

110. What annoys you the most?

111. What (if any) are your favourite forms of art?

112. What is your most treasured possession?

113. What things could he/ she not live without?

114. Do you have a good luck charm? What is it?

115. If your life were to end in 24 hours, what 5 things would you do in those remaining hours?

116. Do you have a "Black-and-White" view of reality or can you see shades of grey?

117. Does you prefer to tear down or build up?

118. Are you deliberate or spontaneous?

119. Do you prefer the town or the country?

120. If made to decide, would you rather be deaf or blind? Why?

121. How do you feel about magic, myth, and the supernatural?

122. Do you remember your dreams?

123. Describe a typical dream you might have.

124. Describe your worst nightmares.

Career/Training

1. Where and how were you educated?

2. Who trained you in your class or job?

3. What was your relationship with your teacher(s)/mentor(s)?

4. How did you happen across this teacher or mentor?

5. Was your mentor kind, stern, cruel, indifferent?

6. Is this person or institution still in existence?

7. Were you forced into your profession by parents or peers?

8. Did circumstances dictate your choice of profession?

9. Were you a prize student or did you just barely pass?

10. Look at your skills. How did you acquire them (especially the unusual ones)?

11. Have you ever done anything else for a living?

12. How do you function in combat (maneuvers, weaknesses)?

13. How would you best be defeated?

14. Have you ever received any awards or honours?

15. What have you done that was considered "outstanding" in your occupation by others in your field?

16. What are your long-term goals in work?

17. Describe any traumatic experiences in your present occupation that has affected you deeply in some way.

18. How do your relatives and friends view your present occupation?

19. Is there anything that you don't currently know how to do that you wish you could?

20. Are you envious of others who can do such things in a good-natured way or are they sullen and morose about it?

Lifestyle/Hobbies

1. What is your normal daily routine?

2. How do you feel and react when this routine is interrupted for some reason?

3. What are your hobbies when they are not adventuring or training?

4. What would you do if you had insomnia and had to find something to do to amuse yourself?

5. What do you do for relaxation?

6. What things do they do for enjoyment?

7. What interests do you have?

8. How do you normally dress, when not in your adventuring gear?

9. Do you like to dress up or down to relax?

10. Do you have a look or style? If so, describe it.

11. What do you normally wear in bed at home?

12. What do you normally wear in bed while adventuring?

13. Do you wear any identifiable jewelry?

14. Where do you normally put your weapons, magic items, or other valuables when you are sleeping?

15. What morning or evening routines do you normally have?

16. Do these change when you is adventuring?

17. What pastime (that you participate in regularly) gives you the most enjoyment?

18. What pastime (that you participate in regularly) gives you the least enjoyment?

19. Do you read the newspaper?

20. If so, which sections and how often?

21. Travel: how do you get around locally?

22. What is your idea of a good evening's entertainment?

23. Do you get seasick, airsick, motion sick?

24. Do you like riding animals?

25. Any fears in traveling?

26. What sorts of general belongings or equipment do you take when traveling?

27.. What are your hangout places?

28. Do you go to a bar after work?

29. Do you go dancing?

30. Who goes with you?

31. What do you read? Scientific textbooks, historical novels, myths and legends, maps, cookbooks, romances, news magazines, science fiction, fantasy, horror, the newspaper, short stories?

32. What music do you like?

33. Do you have a favourite artist, band or bard?

34. Will you listen to or sing the same songs over and over, or does it drive you nuts when people do that?

35. How do you exercise?

36. Do you work out at the gym, walks in the morning, run marathons, play sports, couch potato?

37. Where do you live?

38. Do you rent or own? Apartment, house or castle?

39. How close are the neighbors?

40. Is it a good neighborhood?

41. What colour is the house?

42. Which floor are you on?

43. Do you have a lawn?

44. What about a flower garden?

45. Does your house have an attic or basement?

46. What does your furniture look like?

47. Do you buy antiques?

48. What are your walls covered with? Wallpaper, art, photos?

49. What sorts of curtains do you have?

50. Do you keep your house clean? Is it dusty?

51. Is the bathtub moldy or coated in rust?

52. Do you clean it yourself?

53. What do your desk or workspace look like? Small and cramped, huge and expansive, covered in drifts of books and papers? neatly ordered and clean?

54. Can you find what you're looking for when you need it?

55. What colour are your sheets?

56. Satin or cotton?

57. What sorts of food do you eat?

57a. How do you like your eggs done?

58. Do you cook your own dinners?

59. Are you a good cook, a gourmet, or a terrible cook?

60. Do you eat out?

61. Are you on a diet?

62. Where do you vacation, and how often?

63. Do you have any pets?

64. Do you keep a calendar?

65. Where do you keep it?

66. Did you leave a Will?

67. What does it say?

Miscellaneous

1. What would you like to be remembered for after your death?

2. What kind of threat do you present to public?

3. If your features were to be destroyed beyond recognition, is there any other way of identifying your body?

4. How much do you enjoy a pint of mead?

5. As a player, if you could, what advice would you give you? Speak as if he/she were sitting right here in front of you. Use proper tone so they might heed your advice...