RPD

From Asaction

Current revision as of 04:24, 18 March 2008

RPD is a cool dude, he gave me the nickname GMan CAC

hey ju need stuff in jur page!! RPD is lyk awesome lyk srsly lyk omg!! hawt! - ciddeh.

I know. I finally signed up, but I've gotta figure this shit out...

Too late I beat you to it!! HA HA!!! Sucker!!!

That's way better than anything I'd have written, anyway! ;)

In the Beginning

RPD was born a child prodigy. He created and learned to play guitar while still an infant. His guitar was created using a plastic bag, rubber bands and strands of twine with which he was allowed to play. At the age of 6 he rose to the status of GOD OF ROCK. He was offered a deal to tour with Aerosmith, but turned it down to attend Grace Christian Academy with the goal of becoming a preacher. When RPD hit puberty, he decided that life devoted to God was not his calling. After "leaving" GCA, he was actually kicked out for having a girl in his room past curfew (true story from my life, not his and it was a dude not a girl and curfew was only 9pm, so I didn't... n/m, back to him) RPD spent the next two years living in the 1974 Honda Civic he won at a dog fight. He toured the Western United State and Canada playing at honkey tonks and saloons to pay for his gasoline and booze. On his way back from the Canadaian Arctic Circle, where he developed a fondness for polar bear stew, he ended up on a barstool next to Gordon Lightfoot. The two discussed the recent tragedy of the SS Edmund Fitzgerald, Gordon eventually wrote a chart toping song on the subject.

After the Rock

After growing tired of his nomad ways and the extreme cold, RPD moved to Mexico. He bummed around bars in the Yukatan, hitting on senoritas and swindling tourists until he met Juan Jorge Jose Espinosa Rodriguez y Marquez. Juan Jorge Jose talked to RPD about a wonderful sport that would give him the rush of being in front of an audience and the thrill of beating a total stranger to a pulp. Juan Jorge Jose was talking about Lucha Libre. Again RPD was a master at the art, he trained hard and eventually began fighting using the name RaPiDo. RaPiDo traveled Mexico and fought in some of the lowest dives until he began to work his way higher in popularity. He evetually had t-shirts made with his name and face printed on him. RaPiDo won many matches and is still honored as one of the greatest luchadores in history. RPD finally turned 16 and decided to return to the US because he really missed Taco Bell.

Return of the Legend

RPD's return to the US did not go un-noticed. He was caught by Border Patrol trying to sneak back into the country because when he went to Mexico he didn't have a passport or anything and no one stops you if you go to Mexico, the trouble is in getting back into the US. Fortunately one of the officer's had attended an RPD concert and an exhibition match of RaPido and set him free, but not before calling the paparazzi. As RPD walked the long desert road to Las Cruses, NM, he had a steady stream of admirers follow behind but no one offered him a lift. After all, he had lived in Mexico for the last few months, seducing the senoritas and drinking the water; so, maybe contagious.

The King Comes Home

After an being gone 10 years, 11 months, and 16 days, RPD's parents did not recognise him and threatened to shoot him if he came any closer. Here RPD remembered that he was wearing his RaPiDo mask because it was so damn cold compared to the Mexican spring he left behind. He took off the mask and his parents rushed to greet their long lost son. Then he grew up some more and did other stuff that I'll explain later.

THE END

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