Episode 3: My Cards Will Go On

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Episode 3
My Cards Will Go On
Season 1
Based on YGO episodes 3
Length 4:33
Characters Bakura, Joey, Kemo, Mai Valentine, Rex Raptor, Tea, Tristan, Weevil Underwood, Yugi
Episode link

My Cards Will Go On is the third episode of Yu-Gi-Oh! The Abridged Series, and the first to contain references to the changes in the English dub of Yu-Gi-Oh!.

Contents

Site description

The gang travel to Duellist Kingdom on a luxurious cruise ship, but onboard shenanigans commence.

Transcript

(Taken from the Yu-Gi-Oh! Wikia.)

Yami: I'm not actually in this episode.. has anyone seen my agent?

Yugi: Well, Grandpa's a drooling vegetable. And now, thanks to Pegasus, he's lost his soul too. I just gotta save him. But first, I should probably figure out how to get down from here. Hello? A little help here? Anybody?

Joey: Hey, it's another video! I wonder if Pegasus wants my soul too?
Joey puts the video in the player.
Serenity appears on the screen.
Serenity: What's up big brother?
Joey: It's my sister who sounds nothin' like me!
Serenity: The doctors have been so busy trying to figure out why my voice is so high-pitched, they've neglected to treat my eyesight! So I'm going blind. Well. seeya later! ..or not..
The video stops.
Joey: I guess my soul ain't good enough for Pegasus.

Yugi: I've decided to accept Pegasus' invitation and travel to his private island where I'll be completely at his mercy. It's a shame rich megalomaniacs are immune from the law, otherwise we could just call the police!
Joey: Cash sure does do terrible things to people. It's like the old saying goes: Money is the root of all-
Tristan: Hey look! This tournament has a prize of three million dollars!
Joey: Cha-ching! Duelist Kingdom, here I come!

Yugi: Hey Joey, remember the time we became friends?
Joey: Yeah.

Joey has a flashback:
Yugi: Give me back my Millennium Puzzle you big dickweeds! Waaaah!
Joey and Tristan: We're tormenting you!
The flashback ends.

Yugi: Actually Joey, I was talking about the part after that.
Joey: Oh.. oh yeah, now I remember!

Joey has another flashback:
Yugi: I mean it guys, give it back!
Joey and Tristan: We're still tormenting you!
The flashback ends.

Joey: Man, good times!
Yugi: No Joey, I mean the time when I saved you from that bully!
Joey: Huh.. no.. no, I don't remember that..
Yugi: But I was all heroic and stuff!
Joey: Hey, remember the time me and Tristan took your Millennium Puzzle?

Joey has another flashback:
Yugi: Waaaahahahaaah!
Joey and Tristan: Torment!
The flashback ends.

Yugi: Remind me why we're friends again?

Kemo: Attention Duelists! My hair is telling you that it's time for you to board! Anyone without a crazy hairstyle will NOT be permitted to enter the Duelist Kingdom!
Joey: Hey! But my hair's all blonde and poofy!
Guard: Sorry sir, but it needs to be at least twice the size of your head to count.
Yugi: He's with me.
Guard: Wow! Your hair's crazy enough for two people! Okay he can go.
Joey: Thanks Yug. Man, your hair really is crazy. What the heck's your secret?
Yugi: L'Or���©al. Because I'm worth it.

Téa: Come on, Tristan! Let's sneak on board like Solid Snake!
Tristan: Don't our parents even care that we're missing?

Mai: Is that a Lightforce Sword in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
Joey: Check it out, Yug. It's a pair of giant breasts attached to a woman.
Mai: The name's Mai Valentine. It's not a very subtle pun, but then again, nothing about me is very subtle.
Joey: Boooobiiiiies.
Mai: I'll crush you when we get to the island.
Joey: With your boobies, right?

Tristan: What's wrong, T���©a?
Téa: I need to use the bathroom, but the lady who dubs me won't admit it.
Tristan: In another few hours the sun will rise!
Téa: What the f*ck does that mean?!
Text appears on screen: (seriously, he actually says that... wtf?)
Téa: Hey, isn't that Bakura?
Tristan: Bakura? That limey kid from school?
Téa: What's he doing here?
Tristan: Who cares? He's not even a main character!

Rex: Woah! Uh-huh-huh..Come to Raptor.
Mai: Tell you what, Rex, if I win this duel, I get to use your room. But if you win, then I'll give you a kiss!
Rex: Cool. Then I, like, won't be a virgin anymore.

Weevil: Heh-heh, hey Yugi, heh-heh, like, give me your cards or something. Heh-heh.
Yugi: Well, you're clearly evil, but I see no reason not to trust you.
Weevil: Say goodbye to Exodia!
Weevil throws Exodia overboard.
Weevil: Heh-heh-heh-heh, yeah, heh-heh that was cool, heh-heh-heh.
Weevil walks away.
Yugi: Holy cow, I never even saw that coming!
Joey: I'll save 'em!
Joey dives after the cards.
My Heart Will Go On starts playing.
Joey: Must.. risk.. life.. for cards!
Yugi dives in after Joey to save him.
My Heart Will Go On suddenly stops.
Tristan drops a ladder down to Yugi and Joey.
Tristan: Hey! Get a room you two!

Mai: Get out, loser!
Mai chucks Rex into the hall.
Rex: Uh.. did I just score?

Téa: Sorry you almost drowned, guys.
Tristan: If it's any consolation, the sun will be up in a few hours!
Joey: Man, I can't believe I didn't save your cards! Compared to this, my sister's imminent blindness seems like a minor inconvenience!
Yugi: Your sister? How come you never mentioned that sub-plot before?
Joey: My parents got divorced a long time ago, because I tried teaching her how to drive.

Joey has a flashback:
Serenity: Joey! Stop this crazy thing!
Joey: Apply the handbrake, ya dumb broad!
The flashback ends.

Tristan: If she's going blind, I might actually have a chance with her!

Yugi: We'll both do our best, Joey! You for your sister, and me for my Grandpa.
Téa: I'm not even sure why I bothered coming!
Tristan: Hey, look! I was right about the sun!

References

  • The title, My Cards Will Go On, is a reference to My Heart Will Go On, the theme song of the 1997 movie Titanic.
  • When asked how he keeps his hair like that, Yugi says "L'OrÃ�©al. Because I'm worth it." "Because I'm worth it" is the advertising slogan of L'OrÃ�©al, the world's largest cosmetics and beauty company.
  • When sneaking on board, TÃ�©a says "Come on, Tristan! Let's sneak on board like Solid Snake!" Solid Snake is one of the main characters of the Metal Gear stealth video game series.

Notes

  • At one point, TÃ�©a says "I need to use the bathroom, but the lady who dubs me won't admit it." In the original Japanese version of the episode, TÃ�©a says she needs to use the bathroom. Tristan tells her to pee over the side, and TÃ�©a angrily responds that she can't do that because she's not a boy. In the dub, this part was changed, and TÃ�©a says she's freezing, to which Tristan responds that the sun will rise in a few hours.
  • When Mai enters Rex's room, she says that if he wins a duel against her, she'll give him a kiss, to which Rex responds "Cool. Then I, like, won't be a virgin anymore." In the original Japanese version of the episode, Mai tells Rex that if he wins, she'll do anything he wants. This was deemed to suggestive for the English dub, so in the English dub, Mai instead says that if Rex wins, she'll kiss him.
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